Mid-Morning Art Thread

Pan and Selene
Hans von Aachen

Posted by: CBD at 09:30 AM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Sponge!

Posted by: rickb223 at November 17, 2025 09:31 AM (cIxJn)

2 BOING!

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at November 17, 2025 09:31 AM (w9A/e)

3 Corgis called.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 17, 2025 09:31 AM (cIxJn)

4 That butt cheek looks like a giant donut.

Posted by: redridinghood at November 17, 2025 09:32 AM (NpAcC)

5 I'd prefer Selene with Pan, if she's cooking up some bacon in the pan.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at November 17, 2025 09:32 AM (Dv3i1)

6 4 That butt cheek looks like a giant donut.
__

Yummy!

Posted by: Mayor Pete at November 17, 2025 09:33 AM (Dv3i1)

7 Sexy.

Posted by: Tuna at November 17, 2025 09:33 AM (lJ0H4)

8 I think I paid a quarter in some contraption out in san fran to see this back in 1980.

It was , ummm, not good then and its double plus ungood now.

Back to the dealer for a refund it goes.

Posted by: Somewhere South of I-80 at November 17, 2025 09:34 AM (89Sog)

9 Glad that Pan's Peter is not visible, at least.

Posted by: Peanuts Are Legumes, Too at November 17, 2025 09:34 AM (oftw2)

10 That Selene got around.

Posted by: Count de Monet at November 17, 2025 09:34 AM (wVcYX)

11 Pan was half goat. This painting should involve Muslims.
Would gang though, old style painting.
Thx CBD

Posted by: Smell the Glove at November 17, 2025 09:34 AM (bfwj/)

12
You know how I know Cupid isn't gay?

He doesn't want to stare at Pan's erect wiener.

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:35 AM (iJfKG)

13 Out of the frying Pan and into the fire.

Posted by: Debby Doberman Schultz at November 17, 2025 09:35 AM (0nHVk)

14 Aachen's grandpa chose that family name so that his plumbing company would come up first in the Yellow Pages.

Posted by: Let Your Fingers Do The Walking at November 17, 2025 09:36 AM (oftw2)

15 Clap for the goat-man
He's gonna seduce the moon goddess

Posted by: Burton Cummings et al at November 17, 2025 09:38 AM (wVcYX)

16 Aachen's grandpa chose that family name so that his plumbing company would come up first in the Yellow Pages.
Posted by: Let Your Fingers Do The Walking at November 17, 2025 09:36 AM (oftw2)

Unfortunately, he was outsmarted by-

AAA AACE Plumbers

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:38 AM (iJfKG)

17 I don't think that Mr. von Aachen was as skilled a painter as some others that have been on here. The only thing I like about this painting are the blue and pink drapes.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (Yl2Ob)

18 It's not rapey rape.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (t0Out)

19 This painting radiates evil. Not joy or frivolity. Debased evil and gluttony.

Nope. I don’t like it.

Posted by: nurse ratched at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (is5Ol)

20 What in the heck is that little glint of a pickle-shaped highlight between the two, right about Pan's waist height? That can't be what it looks like, can it?

Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (Ve/HL)

21
The Goat Man is horny.

Geddit?

Do you geddit?

Hahahahaha.

Goat Man. Horny!!!!

Hahaha...ha...

Oh fuck all y'all!!

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:40 AM (iJfKG)

22 Soft porn, 17th century style.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:40 AM (t0Out)

23
Boobs, therefore art.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at November 17, 2025 09:41 AM (tgvbd)

24 This painting radiates evil. Not joy or frivolity. Debased evil and gluttony.

Nope. I don’t like it.
Posted by: nurse ratched at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (is5Ol)

So... frat party or OF filming session?

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at November 17, 2025 09:41 AM (ExV1e)

25 Early centerfold, look at that crease.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 17, 2025 09:41 AM (Ydr2P)

26 It's not something I would hang in the dining room.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:42 AM (t0Out)

27 Hans von Aachen painted a lot of boobies in his time. He would have made a fine Moron.

Posted by: You Know About The Cup Sizes? at November 17, 2025 09:42 AM (oftw2)

28 Mixed signals. Her right hand says 'no,' but her left says 'yes.'

Plus, she's totally nekkid, save that little sash around her knees.

Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:42 AM (Ve/HL)

29 Her toes are curling.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:44 AM (t0Out)

30 Soft porn, 17th century style.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:40 AM (t0Out)

-------------

Pan Solo?

Posted by: ShainS -- Bury My Heart At a Texas MoMe at November 17, 2025 09:44 AM (52caq)

31 That butt cheek looks like a giant donut.

Posted by: redridinghood at November 17, 2025 09:32 AM (NpAcC)

Well...Selene was the moon goddess!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 17, 2025 09:44 AM (n9ltV)

32 Woah!

Posted by: Bad Andrew at November 17, 2025 09:44 AM (6qf1m)

33 would hang

Posted by: Gref at November 17, 2025 09:45 AM (5rh/l)

34 She needs more sun....

Posted by: It's me donna at November 17, 2025 09:45 AM (VE6XX)

35 bulbous buns

Posted by: Don't blame the alligators at November 17, 2025 09:45 AM (1Nv0l)

36 I can't get a handle on this.

Posted by: ShainS -- Bury My Heart At a Texas MoMe at November 17, 2025 09:46 AM (52caq)

37 Selene was often eclipsed by Gaia.

Posted by: Count de Monet at November 17, 2025 09:46 AM (wVcYX)

38 Mixed signals. Her right hand says 'no,' but her left says 'yes.'

Plus, she's totally nekkid, save that little sash around her knees.
Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:42 AM (Ve/HL)

Looking at the background, it looks like she's at an orgy. Her right hand is saying, "Wait, let me shift position."

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (ExV1e)

39 According to Virgil, Selene also had a tryst with the god Pan, who seduced her with a "snowy bribe of wool". Scholia on Virgil add the story, ascribed to Nicander, that as part of the seduction, Pan wrapped himself in a sheepskin.

You're all wrong! When I saw him playing his pipes, and his tongue flicking about so dextrously, I figured I'd give him a shot...

Posted by: Selene at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (JCZqz)

40 Beauty standards change over the centuries. If this were painted today she would have more pullcritude.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (t0Out)

41 Pat does not skip glute day.

Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (Ve/HL)

42 I like how the artist incorporated all the aspects of the myth: Selene's milky skin tones vs. the earthy darker Pan, that it is a night scene (obviously), and the atmosphere of lust and desires that come out at night. The subdued colors all add to the feeling. Very effective. I can imagine this hanging in a tavern or a man's sitting room.

Posted by: JTB at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (yTvNw)

43 I did Hans a disservice . I looked him up. His individual portraits are much better, IMO, than his group paintings.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (rZCVI)

44 Playing pipe

then

Laying pipe

lol

Posted by: Bad Andrew at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (6qf1m)

45 This could use a happy little bush or three.

But, hey, it's your painting!

Posted by: zombie Bob Ross at November 17, 2025 09:48 AM (0sNs1)

46 I think my hands would be aching too.

Posted by: pawn at November 17, 2025 09:48 AM (sPsWv)

47 I can imagine this hanging in a tavern or a man's sitting room.
Posted by: JTB at November 17, 2025 09:47 AM (yTvNw)

Or the Longbranch

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:48 AM (t0Out)

48 Looks like Pan is about to get a little.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at November 17, 2025 09:49 AM (g8Ew8)

49 Racy.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at November 17, 2025 09:49 AM (UAGeO)

50 Least we ain't featurin' no Greek homos this mornin'.

Posted by: Reverend Al Sharptongue at November 17, 2025 09:49 AM (oftw2)

51 I think I'll go see what the husband is doing.

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:50 AM (t0Out)

52 High Plains Drifter barn scene, Greek god style?

Posted by: Count de Monet at November 17, 2025 09:50 AM (wVcYX)

53 https://artworks.thetvdb.com/banners
/v4/series/420225/posters/631df0769c84a.jpg

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at November 17, 2025 09:51 AM (uSvZK)

54 Selene didn't have the scratch to pay for her delivered pizza, but it appears a satisfactory negotiation has occurred to resolve the tense situation.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (0sNs1)

55 40 Beauty standards change over the centuries. If this were painted today she would have ~~more pullcritude~~ whatever she wanted to have, she's a divine Goddess!!!
Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair

Fixed it for you, you misogynist male gazer! I'm 340lbs, blue haired with shaved sides, a septum ring and plenty of tats, queer and neurodivergent, and I'm beautiful! Men want me, but are intimidated and hate women too much to ask me out, which I'd never accept because I hate men so much!

Posted by: Angry Feminist at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (JCZqz)

56 20 What in the heck is that little glint of a pickle-shaped highlight between the two, right about Pan's waist height? That can't be what it looks like, can it?
Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM (Ve/HL)

Don't know what you're talking about. I was busy looking at the boobehs.

Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (GD2xa)

57 Was this part of Hugh Hefner's collection?

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (t0Out)

58 Selene: I hope he cleaned his hooves.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at November 17, 2025 09:53 AM (UAGeO)

59 Posted by: Angry Feminist at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (JCZqz)

Snort

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 09:55 AM (t0Out)

60 Would this be beastiality?

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM (EYmYM)

61 Selene needs to get outside more, I bet she's Vitamin D deficient.

Posted by: Sonnenfans Nudist Colony at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM (oftw2)

62 What in the heck is that little glint of a pickle-shaped highlight between the two, right about Pan's waist height? That can't be what it looks like, can it?
Posted by: red speck at November 17, 2025 09:39 AM

It's a reflection from the sniper's scope. Proper employment of a sun screen on your optics significantly reduces this risk of being detected, which, as Carlos Hathcock proved, can be detrimental to a sniper's health.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM (0sNs1)

63 Selene didn't have the scratch to pay for her delivered pizza, but it appears a satisfactory negotiation has occurred to resolve the tense situation.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at November 17, 2025 09:52 AM (0sNs1)

The plot of the first popular Ancient Greek Porno Play written by Aristophanes,

"Deep Goat".

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM (iJfKG)

64 Is Paolo this swarthy?

Posted by: Pale Imitation at November 17, 2025 09:58 AM (oftw2)

65 Still not fond of dark paintings.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 09:58 AM (EYmYM)

66 The plot of the first popular Ancient Greek Porno Play written by Aristophanes,

"Deep Goat".

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM

You want tongue, you should see what our first draft looked like.

Posted by: The Frogs at November 17, 2025 09:58 AM (bFu5X)

67 58 Selene: I hope he cleaned his hooves.
Posted by: San Franpsycho

Dear Diary: I never thought my job at Morning Glory Milking Farm would lead to a date with a satyr, let alone a celebrity one! I was so turned on, I gave it up on the first date...

Posted by: Selene at November 17, 2025 09:59 AM (JCZqz)

68 Hey baby would you like some goat milk?

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 09:59 AM (EYmYM)

69 Pagan boibs are best boobs. Art, even with no dog.

Posted by: From about That Time at November 17, 2025 10:00 AM (sl73Y)

70 Will you still respect me in the morning?

Posted by: Selene at November 17, 2025 10:01 AM (0sNs1)

71 Selene: Hey, Pan. Ya ever fucked a goddess?

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at November 17, 2025 10:01 AM (g8Ew8)

72 Those two are blowing curfew

Posted by: ALH, Sister Golden Hair at November 17, 2025 10:02 AM (t0Out)

73 I'd like more info on the right side action there. Looks ....interesting.

Posted by: From about That Time at November 17, 2025 10:02 AM (sl73Y)

74
Toned buttix.

Posted by: Jack Lalane at November 17, 2025 10:02 AM (d4X7t)

75 What in the heck is that little glint of a pickle-shaped highlight between the two, right about Pan's waist height? That can't be what it looks like, can it?
Posted by: red speck

IT'S PAN'S PENIS.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at November 17, 2025 10:03 AM (JCZqz)

76 There's some other hot action in the background.

Posted by: Angzarr the Cromulent at November 17, 2025 10:03 AM (CVEDh)

77 Those greek and roman gods were all running around having sex with other gods, humans and animals.

Way too much time on their hands.

Posted by: Gods and Whores at November 17, 2025 10:03 AM (1mUlr)

78 Will you still respect me in the morning?
Posted by: Selene at November 17, 2025 10:01 AM (0sNs1)

In the morning? Hell, I don't respect you now.

Posted by: Pan at November 17, 2025 10:03 AM (wVcYX)

79 Who's that goatlegged fellow in Sector B? I like the cut of his jib.

Posted by: toby928(c) at November 17, 2025 10:03 AM (yRJGL)

80 With all this rapin' and sex crimes happening in Greece, it's no wonder the normal Greeks came to America to open diners.

Posted by: Gus and Stavros at November 17, 2025 10:04 AM (oftw2)

81 The plot of the first popular Ancient Greek Porno Play written by Aristophanes,

"Deep Goat".

Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:56 AM

------------------

The Iberian Peninsula version was marketed as "Selene Does Salas."

Posted by: ShainS -- Bury My Heart At a Texas MoMe at November 17, 2025 10:06 AM (Dc/5i)

82 With all this rapin' and sex crimes happening in Greece, it's no wonder the normal Greeks came to America to open diners.
Posted by: Gus and Stavros at November 17, 2025 10:04 AM (oftw2)

Now I'm hungry for a gyro.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at November 17, 2025 10:07 AM (g8Ew8)

83 This period of Mannerism came right after the Renaissance of Michelangelo and Da Vinci. Like the beginning of abstract , it took what was beautiful and tried to make it ugly.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:07 AM (EYmYM)

84 82 With all this rapin' and sex crimes happening in Greece, it's no wonder the normal Greeks came to America to open diners.
Posted by: Gus and Stavros

We taught philosophy and astrology and mathematics before Socrates and them Greek homos ever got around to it! (lol...actual quote)

Posted by: Rev Al Sharpton at November 17, 2025 10:09 AM (JCZqz)

85 Pan is hoping she'll play his flute.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:10 AM (L/fGl)

86 Pan was a major perv.

Posted by: runner at November 17, 2025 10:11 AM (g47mK)

87 79 Who's that goatlegged fellow in Sector B? I like the cut of his jib.
Posted by: toby928(c)

What? Who cares?! I'm about to get my fill of Sector D!

Posted by: Selene at November 17, 2025 10:11 AM (JCZqz)

88 Selene: Can’t you take neighhhh for an answer !

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:11 AM (EYmYM)

89 With all this rapin' and sex crimes happening in Greece, it's no wonder the normal Greeks came to America to open diners.
Posted by: Gus and Stavros at November 17, 2025 10:04 AM (oftw2)

No Coke, Pepsi.

Posted by: Olympia Diner at November 17, 2025 10:14 AM (wVcYX)

90 I know someone who knocked down and nearly knocked out Jack Lalanne with one punch. Jack was hitting on his wife and didn't stop when warned. Jack was on the floor, holding his chin, and said to my friend, "I'll sue you!". Buddy answered-No you won't! You would never want someone to know I took you down with one punch! Of course, Jack didn't sue.

Posted by: Glass Jaw at November 17, 2025 10:14 AM (oftw2)

91 Selene has that Greek Toe going on.

Posted by: Count de Monet at November 17, 2025 10:15 AM (wVcYX)

92 10 to go

Posted by: alpine_beer at November 17, 2025 10:15 AM (van9r)

93 Posted by: Glass Jaw at November 17, 2025 10:14 AM (oftw2)

Wrong thread. The non-sequitur thread is down the street.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:15 AM (EYmYM)

94 Was Selene pansexual?

Posted by: Still lurking up north, read some, don't comment much at November 17, 2025 10:15 AM (kTd/k)

95 With all this rapin' and sex crimes happening in Greece, it's no wonder the normal Greeks came to America to open diners.
Posted by: Gus and Stavros
___________

That's how we got Cincinnati chili. For which I am thankful, but I understand most of you lot consider a curse.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at November 17, 2025 10:15 AM (XvL8K)

96 Not surprised she didn't stay loyal to Endymion after he was put into eternal sleep.

But to make like a Jihadi and go directly to a goat?

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:16 AM (UnA8+)

97 Wakes up
Scratches
Looks around
Dang. It's Slam Bam Thank Yee Pan!
Goes looking for coffee.

Posted by: Diogenes at November 17, 2025 10:16 AM (2WIwB)

98 From Pausanias we hear that Selene was supposed to have had fifty daughters, by her lover Endymion,

-
Ehh, you can't trust Pausanias.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:18 AM (L/fGl)

99 Pan and Selene
Hans von Aachen

Christie's -
Provenance
Painted for the Imperial collection of Rudolf II, Prague, where possibly recorded in an inventory of 1621 as Pan and Selene.
Sold to the art dealer Daniel de Briers in 1623 and recorded in an inventory dated 30 March 1623, no. 34, 'Buhlschaft Venus mit zwei satyri'.
London art market, circa 1984, where acquired by the present owner.

Lot Essay
In part, "Variously described in the past as Venus and a Satyr and Jupiter and Antiope, Fucíková was first to identify the subject as Pan and Selene, taken from Virgil's account of how the moon goddess Selene was seduced by the shepherd Endymion in the guise of Pan. The choice of subject reflects Rudolf II's taste for erotic mythological paintings and also reveals how von Aachen was influenced by the Italian paintings in his patron's collection: most obviously Correggio's Jupiter and Io and Titian's Danae.
--
While an excellent artist, I'd pass in as far as hanging this painting. (Porn fantasy for Rudolf II, Holy Roman Emperor from 1576 to 1612, Prague.)

Thanks
PS - Read the one name as Fu*kover at 1st glance.

Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at November 17, 2025 10:19 AM (NFX2v)

100 A lot of the Greek Diners in NY/NJ were owned by collections of 3-4 Brothers. There was always one brother at a time visiting back home in Greece, probably living high on the hog, impressing the locals.

Posted by: Stavros, Nick, Gus, and Christos at November 17, 2025 10:21 AM (oftw2)

101 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:22 AM (Zz0t1)

102 I saw Greek Toe open for Delta Spirit at Club Downunder in '07.

Posted by: ShainS -- Bury My Heart At a Texas MoMe at November 17, 2025 10:22 AM (Dc/5i)

103 And I'm lookin......

At yo tittays!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:22 AM (Zz0t1)

104 I guess levitation was a thing back in the biblical times.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:22 AM (Zz0t1)

105 He's got rotten leg disease.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:22 AM (Zz0t1)

106 And now a lot of diners, delis, etc. are actually Lebanese owned and operated.

Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (NFX2v)

107 Now they've gone too far!

Report: British Government To Enact Milkshake Tax

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (L/fGl)

108 It kinda looks like my mom when we found her.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (Zz0t1)

109 Ehh, you can't trust Pausanias.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:18 AM (L/fGl)

Pausanias men were giants but the women were quite small. And when the women got old they got even smaller. They were known as minipausians.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (g8Ew8)

110 106 And now a lot of diners, delis, etc. are actually Lebanese owned and operated.
Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (NFX2v)

------------

You can tell by the lumberjack shirts.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at November 17, 2025 10:24 AM (dyewR)

111 So is she screwing a man or a goat?

Really I don't care.Would not hang anyway.

Posted by: Case at November 17, 2025 10:25 AM (9HFDU)

112 Update:

First lady is doing OK from the surgery pain wise, however it appears her compromised immune system from chemo still has her susceptible to viruses as we believe she's got ecoil again. She's been spiking fever all weekend. We'll be calling the doctor today to see if we can just get an antibiotic or whatever instead of having to go to the damn ER and her getting poked and prodded to find what we already know..........

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (Zz0t1)

113 I'm wondering if this isn't beastiality, or is Pan the first Furry?

Posted by: Skip at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (m9F4f)

114 100

Posted by: Stavros, Nick, Gus, and Christos at November 17, 2025 10:21 AM (oftw2)

What, no George?

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (UnA8+)

115 Maybe it would look different in person, but I'm not a fan of paintings like this one that have a lit of dark, dim space.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (JtU44)

116 I’ve said before my favorite pizza place owned and operated by a Greek family. It was way more than just pizza and had a unique menu and taste. Everyone told them to expand and they would make a fortune but they just remained one restaurant going on 65years now.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (EYmYM)

117 I've seen worse porn.
I'd hang this pic.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, Buy ammo at November 17, 2025 10:27 AM (xcxpd)

118 Posted by: Stavros, Nick, Gus, and Christos at November 17, 2025 10:21 AM (oftw2)

What, no George?
Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (UnA8+)

Close enough............You asked for it...........

https://youtu.be/gPpKjo3TIuU

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:27 AM (Zz0t1)

119 Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (Zz0t1)

I'll say a little prayer for an easy fix...

Posted by: It's me donna at November 17, 2025 10:27 AM (VE6XX)

120 The Goat Man is horny.

Geddit?

Do you geddit?

Hahahahaha.

Goat Man. Horny!!!!

Hahaha...ha...

Oh fuck all y'all!!
Posted by: naturalfake at November 17, 2025 09:40 AM (iJfKG)

***
That was baa-aaa-aaa-aaad!

Posted by: Diogenes at November 17, 2025 10:28 AM (2WIwB)

121 113 I'm wondering if this isn't beastiality, or is Pan the first Furry?
Posted by: Skip at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (m9F4f)

There is a LOT of bestiality in Greece and Asia Minor. Some loose shit running around that part of the ancient world.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, Buy ammo at November 17, 2025 10:29 AM (xcxpd)

122 116 I’ve said before my favorite pizza place owned and operated by a Greek family. It was way more than just pizza and had a unique menu and taste. Everyone told them to expand and they would make a fortune but they just remained one restaurant going on 65years now.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (EYmYM)

The last of the Greek Diners in my area shut down because the family decided to focus specifically on Greek dishes and opened a Gyro shop in another town.

Apprently it's doing really well, though.

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:30 AM (UnA8+)

123 107 Now they've gone too far!

Report: British Government To Enact Milkshake Tax
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (L/fGl)

*Kelis has left the chat*

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, Buy ammo at November 17, 2025 10:30 AM (xcxpd)

124 I'll say a little prayer for an easy fix...
Posted by: It's me donna at November 17, 2025 10:27 AM (VE6XX)

Thank you.

I hope she's had enough with doctors and all that and lets her body just heal for a LONG time.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:30 AM (Zz0t1)

125 Selena said he was the GOAT!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:30 AM (L/fGl)

126 Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (Zz0t1)

Thanks for the update.Hopefully they can get it taken care of without you going to the hospital. Prayers continue.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 17, 2025 10:31 AM (Yl2Ob)

127 Thinking of Bulg this morning and hoping his orientation day with the USPS is going well and that he finds an opportunity for satisfying employment.

Posted by: old chick at November 17, 2025 10:31 AM (F3Dlr)

128
Thanks for the update.Hopefully they can get it taken care of without you going to the hospital. Prayers continue.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 17, 2025 10:31 AM (Yl2Ob)

Thank you.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:32 AM (Zz0t1)

129 Maybe it would look different in person, but I'm not a fan of paintings like this one that have a lit of dark, dim space.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at November 17, 2025 10:26 AM (JtU44)

Based on the subject matter, we're better off with lots of dark, dim space.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at November 17, 2025 10:33 AM (ExV1e)

130 123 *Kelis has left the chat*
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, Buy ammo at November 17, 2025 10:30 AM (xcxpd)

She already hated us so much right now (AAAAAAAAGH!).

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:34 AM (UnA8+)

131 Posted by: old chick at November 17, 2025 10:31

That's very nice of you. I was just thinking that's why he isn't here.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 17, 2025 10:34 AM (Yl2Ob)

132 So long as painters remember Athena was, is, and will always be black…

Posted by: Christopher Nolan at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (sVOFR)

133 In 1971 my dad took me to the first weekend of Indy 500 quals to celebrate my birthday, several family members were there. During a lull in the action I noticed that there were 2 people wrasslin in a tent over across the way in the Infamous Snake Pit......I grabbed my birthday present binoculars and zoomed in..... It wasnt 2 guys and it wasn't wrasslin! I handed the spyglasses over to my cousin and softly said "there are 2 people over there in that tent" and he proudly announced "she's naked too". My dad took the binoculars and I never did get them back. All he ever said was "don't tell your mom what you saw"

Posted by: TheCatAttackedMyFoot at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (LOZbR)

134 107 Now they've gone too far!

Report: British Government To Enact Milkshake Tax
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Why Do the Heathen Rage? at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (L/fGl)
---
How soon until angry Brits start dumping milkshake mix into the Thames River?

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (IBQGV)

135 132 So long as painters remember Athena was, is, and will always be black…
Posted by: Christopher Nolan at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (sVOFR)

AEW wrestler Adrienne "Athena" Palmer, yes.

But otherwise...

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:36 AM (UnA8+)

136 Now I can never watch the Magnificent Seven again . Eddie Murphy ruined it for me.

He claims Yul Brynner tried to pick him up at Studio 54 when Eddie was 22 years old.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:37 AM (EYmYM)

137 I rode in the Endymion parade at Mardi Gras.

Tried to impregnate Selene but was too drunk on all the daiquiris.

Posted by: stu-mick-o-sucks at November 17, 2025 10:37 AM (MDua2)

138 132 So long as painters remember Athena was, is, and will always be black…
Posted by: Christopher Nolan at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (sVOFR)

Congolese tribesmen sitting around, 15 thousand years ago, bullshitting about cosmology and stuff....

"Hey, you know how we have a god of shoving bones and metal and crap through holes in our septums?"

"Yeah?"

"We should make that guy Japanese."

".... What?"

Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:38 AM (JwNbV)

139
He claims Yul Brynner tried to pick him up at Studio 54 when Eddie was 22 years old.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:37 AM (EYmYM)

Murphy picked up transsexuals and played with their feet.

I'm not sure I trust much that comes out of his mouth on such things.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:38 AM (Zz0t1)

140 Some bald nobody cousin of some backlot movie executive, running around telling people he's Yul Brynner to get laid....

Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:40 AM (JwNbV)

141 Now I can never watch the Magnificent Seven again . Eddie Murphy ruined it for me.

He claims Yul Brynner tried to pick him up at Studio 54 when Eddie was 22 years old.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:37 AM (EYmYM)

I have always assumed that everyone in Hollywood would fuck anything that moved at the drop of a hat. As long as they shut up about everything not having to do with whatever film they're currently promoting, I don't really care.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at November 17, 2025 10:40 AM (ExV1e)

142 I pray that Heritage’s research and advocacy will be guided by the conviction that each and every member of the human family, irrespective of race, ethnicity, religion, or anything else, as a creature fashioned in the very image of God, is “created equal” and “endowed by our Creator with certain unalienable rights.”

The anchor for the Heritage Foundation, and for our Nation, and for every patriotic American is that creed. It must always be that creed. If we hold fast to it even when expediency counsels compromising it, we cannot go wrong. If we abandon it, we sign the death certificate of republican government and ordered liberty.
--Prof. Robert George
====

Another Heritage board resignation.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at November 17, 2025 10:41 AM (9ipOP)

143 How soon until angry Brits start dumping milkshake mix into the Thames River?
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (IBQGV)

The first of Never. They will meekly go along, and muse about how Starmer’s government will fall any day now and how polls today show Reform winning the 2029 election.

Posted by: Christopher Nolan at November 17, 2025 10:41 AM (sVOFR)

144 Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:38 AM (Zz0t1)

Just looked at the intertubes . Didn’t know that it was an open secret that Brynner was likely bisexual. I wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:42 AM (EYmYM)

145 Off, sock…

Posted by: Cow Demon at November 17, 2025 10:42 AM (sVOFR)

146 141 I have always assumed that everyone in Hollywood would fuck anything that moved at the drop of a hat. As long as they shut up about everything not having to do with whatever film they're currently promoting, I don't really care.
Posted by: I used to have a different nic at November 17, 2025 10:40 AM (ExV1e)

You want in the club?

You f*** what they tell you to f***.

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:42 AM (UnA8+)

147 You f*** what they tell you to f***.
Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:42 AM (UnA8+)

"Embrace the suck" means something completely different to those people....

Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:43 AM (JwNbV)

148 And now a lot of diners, delis, etc. are actually Lebanese owned and operated.
Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (NFX2v)

The Pappa's Gyros near us is actually run by a Pakistani family. That was a surprise.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at November 17, 2025 10:44 AM (lFFaq)

149 Selene's great love was the shepherd prince Endymion. The beautiful boy was granted eternal youth and immortality by Zeus and placed in a state of eternal slumber in a cave near the peak of Lydian Mount Latmos (Latmus). His heavenly bride consorted with him there in the night.

Seems like Selene is the one doing the raping, amirite?

Posted by: stu-mick-o-sucks at November 17, 2025 10:44 AM (MDua2)

150 71 Selene: Hey, Pan. Ya ever fucked a goddess?
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at November 17, 2025 10:01 AM (g8Ew

I FEEL THE URGE THE GROWING NEED
TO FUCK THIS SINFUL CORPSE

Posted by: Slayer at November 17, 2025 10:44 AM (sVOFR)

151 How soon until angry Brits start dumping milkshake mix into the Thames River?
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at November 17, 2025 10:35 AM (IBQGV)

The first of Never. They will meekly go along, and muse about how Starmer’s government will fall any day now and how polls today show Reform winning the 2029 election.
Posted by: Christopher Nolan at November 17, 2025 10:41 AM (sVOFR)
***

Be better off dumping a bunch of muzzies into the Thames.

Posted by: Diogenes at November 17, 2025 10:45 AM (2WIwB)

152 Back to it…

Posted by: Cow Demon at November 17, 2025 10:45 AM (sVOFR)

153 The gods were angry that day, my friends...

Posted by: George Costanza at November 17, 2025 10:46 AM (O0FVw)

154 I wish the Woke Left would follow the lead of the woke lesbian celebrities and all move to the British Isles.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:46 AM (EYmYM)

155 125 Selena said he was the GOAT!
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks

Once you go faun, you, uh...can't stay away long?

Posted by: Pan at November 17, 2025 10:47 AM (JCZqz)

156 154 I wish the Woke Left would follow the lead of the woke lesbian celebrities and all move to the British Isles.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:46 AM (EYmYM)

Nooooooooo!

Posted by: Hank Johnson at November 17, 2025 10:47 AM (JwNbV)

157 Just looked at the intertubes . Didn’t know that it was an open secret that Brynner was likely bisexual. I wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:42 AM (EYmYM)

You asked for it.........

https://youtu.be/EMprpu0et9M

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:47 AM (Zz0t1)

158 Once you go faun, you, uh...can't stay away long?
Posted by: Pan at November 17, 2025 10:47 AM (JCZqz)

Once she goes satyr, nothin' else will sate 'er?

Posted by: Hank Johnson at November 17, 2025 10:48 AM (JwNbV)

159 Thanks, Hank.

No way i'm taking credit for that back-alley abortion of a joke.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:48 AM (JwNbV)

160 148 And now a lot of diners, delis, etc. are actually Lebanese owned and operated.
Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at November 17, 2025 10:23 AM (NFX2v)

The Pappa's Gyros near us is actually run by a Pakistani family. That was a surprise.
Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at November 17, 2025 10:44 AM (lFFaq)

A lot of the Diners/"Family Restaurants" around here are Egyptian-owned, of all things.

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:49 AM (UnA8+)

161 what is going on with my man's left glute?

It looks like a shark took a bite out of him.

Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 10:49 AM (dCxaZ)

162 It appears as though this Pan was circumcised.

Who do we blame for that?

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at November 17, 2025 10:50 AM (X8fgo)

163 Damn Sponge you ruined another group I kinda liked.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:50 AM (EYmYM)

164
A lot of the Diners/"Family Restaurants" around here are Egyptian-owned, of all things.
Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:49 AM (UnA8+)

Every convenience store or small liquor store around here, and even in the middle of nowhere, is owned by middle easterners. And they love to overcharge.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:51 AM (Zz0t1)

165 Satyr? I just met her!

Posted by: Rimshot at November 17, 2025 10:51 AM (O0FVw)

166 You know how I know Cupid isn't gay?

He doesn't want to stare at Pan's erect wiener.

He looks like he's staring at his own little stiffy

Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 10:51 AM (dCxaZ)

167 hmm. art is oddly topical.

when someone planned out the software i'm currently working on, they dubbed one piece of it hermes and the other aphrodite. it's a theme i grabbed with both hands and ran with. a server running in our labs is called selene. the software i've been working on this pi to molest selene is called pan.

Posted by: anachronda at November 17, 2025 10:51 AM (oY6Yp)

168 I'm beginning to think 'furries' might be mentally ill.

Breaking from Daily Mail:

Donald Trump's would-be assassin used 'they/them' pronouns on a website known for hosting pornographic 'furry' material.

Thomas Crooks, who shot Trump at a rally in Butler, Pennsylvania, at the height of the presidential campaign in 2023, went by the alias 'epicmicrowave' and 'theepicmicrowave' on the website DeviantArt.

The website hosts sexually explicit images of 'furries' - human-like animal characters.

Posted by: one hour sober at November 17, 2025 10:52 AM (Y1sOo)

169 Damn Sponge you ruined another group I kinda liked.
Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:50 AM (EYmYM)

I help where I can.

However, that song was them making fun of the hollywood elite jet set. They did that a lot......Now, they were also kinda racist and hated white people, so there's always that. Whitey always holding them down.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:52 AM (Zz0t1)

170 166 You know how I know Cupid isn't gay?

He doesn't want to stare at Pan's erect wiener.

He looks like he's staring at his own little stiffy

a 3.5" floppy?

Posted by: anachronda at November 17, 2025 10:52 AM (oY6Yp)

171 Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:52 AM (Zz0t1)

I only listened to half of it but I didn’t hear the making fun part. Sounded kind of self revealing but maybe I have bias blinders on.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:54 AM (EYmYM)

172 164 Every convenience store or small liquor store around here, and even in the middle of nowhere, is owned by middle easterners. And they love to overcharge.

is mistranslation. is supposed to be "reset".

Posted by: hillary! at November 17, 2025 10:54 AM (oY6Yp)

173 These Hans were made for Aachen....

Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:54 AM (JwNbV)

174 164 Every convenience store or small liquor store around here, and even in the middle of nowhere, is owned by middle easterners. And they love to overcharge.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:51 AM

Most non-chain convenience stores here are still Hindu-owned.

We don't have privately-owned liquor stores.

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:55 AM (UnA8+)

175 These Hans were made for Aachen....
Posted by: Warai-otoko at November 17, 2025 10:54 AM

Is that what the kids are calling it today?

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at November 17, 2025 10:55 AM (bFu5X)

176 161 what is going on with my man's left glute?

It looks like a shark took a bite out of him.
Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 10:49 AM (dCxaZ)

When you have defined gluteus maximuses 😀 that happens.

Posted by: Piper at November 17, 2025 10:56 AM (aT5K/)

177 Most non-chain convenience stores here are still Hindu-owned.

We don't have privately-owned liquor stores.
Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 10:55 AM (UnA8+)

We have a mix now. The cleanest convenience store next to me is Indian owned.

Posted by: the way I see it at November 17, 2025 10:57 AM (EYmYM)

178
Is that what the kids are calling it today?
Posted by: RedMindBlueState at November 17, 2025 10:55 AM (bFu5X)

No, I think they're calling it 'going to get ice cream' now.......

*sigh*

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:57 AM (Zz0t1)

179 No, I think they're calling it 'going to get ice cream' now.......

*sigh*
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 10:57 AM (Zz0t1)

That's so gyatt i'm gonna skibbidi.

Posted by: Warai-otoko speaks fluent retard at November 17, 2025 10:58 AM (JwNbV)

180 Every convenience store or small liquor store around here, and even in the middle of nowhere, is owned by middle easterners. And they love to overcharge.
Posted by: Sponge

Spec's or Goody-Goody. And stay the hell outta Lake Dallas. They were higher than a cat's back in the early 80's.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 17, 2025 10:59 AM (cIxJn)

181 179 That's so gyatt i'm gonna skibbidi.
Posted by: Warai-otoko speaks fluent retard at November 17, 2025 10:58 AM (JwNbV)

Cap. On G-d.

Posted by: XTC at November 17, 2025 11:00 AM (UnA8+)

182 Rant up!

Posted by: rickb223 at November 17, 2025 11:01 AM (cIxJn)

183 one hour at 168- I'm beginning to think furries are mentally ill.

Is there any other explanation?

Posted by: Eromero at November 17, 2025 11:03 AM (LHPAg)

184 A lot of the Greek Diners in NY/NJ were owned by collections of 3-4 Brothers. There was always one brother at a time visiting back home in Greece, probably living high on the hog, impressing the locals.
Posted by: Stavros, Nick, Gus, and Christos at November 17, 2025 10:21 AM (oftw2)

and Greeks dominated the diner supply chain

Lacas coffee, anyone?

Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 11:04 AM (dCxaZ)

185
Spec's or Goody-Goody. And stay the hell outta Lake Dallas. They were higher than a cat's back in the early 80's.
Posted by: rickb223 at November 17, 2025 10:59 AM (cIxJn)

I stopped going to Goody Goody years ago because they kept selling my kegs, which I reserved in advance, out from under me.

There was a local place, owned locally, that I frequented, but he sold to an Indian (dot) and they moved, but there is a brand new Spec's near by.

When we move, however, that gets more difficult. The local place is Indian (or Paki) owned and the other is Asian......and they're both expensive as hell.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at November 17, 2025 11:04 AM (Zz0t1)

186
When you have defined gluteus maximuses 😀 that happens.
Posted by: Piper at November 17, 2025 10:56 AM (aT5K/)

a shark bite on the side?

I have dated a personal trainer, a boxer, a martial artist and other various and sundry athletic types.

I don't recall a shark bite on the side of the butt. And those men were fit, like fr fr

Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 11:06 AM (dCxaZ)

187 maybe a little indentation or cut, but that thing on Pan is extreme

maybe it's the goat DNA making its mark

Posted by: kallisto at November 17, 2025 11:06 AM (dCxaZ)

188 So was Selene panned or Pan mooned? The inclusive or reigns supreme in this golden moment.

Posted by: epador at November 17, 2025 11:21 AM (a+SRK)

189 I tried to explain to Bulg “Part Time Mail Handler” isn’t what it sounds like. It’s a job description, insofar as one is not a “regular” employee for USPS.

There is absolutely nothing “part time” about the hours. 12 hours daily with no set day off is the standard. Holidays too. All of them. While there is no mail delivery maybe, the gnomes and trolls deep within the bowels of the postal system have to keep things moving along.

The turnover is high, many people can’t hack it, regardless of whether carrier or clerk.

Posted by: Common Tater at November 17, 2025 11:25 AM (vEz2K)

190 > 61 Selene needs to get outside more, I bet she's Vitamin D deficient.

I think that's abut to get rectified

Posted by: Waiting for Martel at November 17, 2025 12:34 PM (x7+cv)

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