First World Problems...

As much as I like bacon and fish (sometimes even together!), cooking them is another issue. Recall the poor function of my kitchen vent? Well, it hasn't gotten any better, and the most pleasant solution for redolent cooking odors is a nice scented candle.

But..damn! They are expensive, and they mostly smell like cloying laundry detergent. So what's a cheapskate to do? Make them myself of course!

That's a cheap whiskey glass that came with a bottle of Dalmore about 100 years ago. The other one broke, so I have repurposed it for the extra wax after I made two large candles in old and hazy wine glasses. Yup...that's the progression at Chez Dildo. Wine --> Candle --> garbage!

But wine glasses don't get hazy at the same rate as I burn candles, so I am poking through cupboards looking for appropriate candidates!

The struggle is real!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:01 PM (+qU29)

2 So a bacon scented candle? Alrighty then

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 02:02 PM (VPPG8)

3 My wife is a candle burner, Doesn't do much for me

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:02 PM (+qU29)

4
Candle-making is the last refuge of a mental defective.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:03 PM (yZua4)

5 Depressing day as usual but...

@TheBabylonBee 1m
King Saul's Troubled Spirit Soothed By Sick New Effects Pedal David Got For His Harp

Posted by: weft cut-loop at September 28, 2025 02:04 PM (mlg/3)

6 FWP

On the ferry to Bainbridge island to meet up with Some Rat. I have Ladyl with me.

The mountains are hiding. Grrrrrr

Whoot!

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 28, 2025 02:04 PM (sevWW)

7 instead reach the machine room.
There, the Priestess of the Whip, assisted by two topless drummers, commands more than a hundred slave girls. They are naked except for loincloths.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at September 28, 2025 02:04 PM (TJZm9)

8 My FWP is: there's a knot in the screen fabric of my patio door. It's near the center and distracts me as I gaze out-- it RUINS the view!

Posted by: JQ at September 28, 2025 02:05 PM (rdVOm)

9 Mason jars work well

Posted by: It's me donna at September 28, 2025 02:05 PM (VE6XX)

10 So... Mandles?

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at September 28, 2025 02:05 PM (GZJe+)

11 That's a very pretty cheap whiskey glass, CBD. It makes an attractive candle.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:08 PM (FMtrg)

12 Wide mouth canning jars half pint or pint
Wrap candle in foil after removing candle from mold

Posted by: epador at September 28, 2025 02:08 PM (lMDLA)

13 I saw this at a questionable news site, so who knows if it is true...

Marcus Hale: Ex-Army Vet Identified in Grand Blanc Church Shooting That Killed 2
Suspect in Grand Blanc LDS Church Shooting Posted Anti-Mormon Rants Before Fiery Attack

Posted by: Mister Ghost at September 28, 2025 02:08 PM (TGPs7)

14 Mass shooting at a church in Michigan

https://tinyurl.com/4kcn8f42

Posted by: Don Black at September 28, 2025 02:09 PM (AOsQT)

15 Mass shooting at a church in Michigan

https://tinyurl.com/4kcn8f42
Posted by: Don Black
----------

That's a 3rd world problem. Down the hall, on the left...

Posted by: JQ at September 28, 2025 02:11 PM (rdVOm)

16 My aunt burned candles all the time. After she passed, it took my uncle a while to scrub the ceilings clean. There was that much of a build-up, but she burned a LOT of candles.

Here's a truly 1st world, small town problem.

There's a truck that comes around a few times a year to scrub the curbs clean. It passed by this week. Man is that thing loud.

Posted by: Posted by: Stateless - VERY GRATEFUL, BLESSED, LOVED AND HAPPY! -- - New Life Creation - 18.1% at September 28, 2025 02:11 PM (Sco7b)

17
This week's FWP: people who clog a parking lot aisle for ten minutes waiting for a space to open up. Likely in league with the driver of the car sitting in the space, who is making a leisurely phone call.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:11 PM (tgvbd)

18 On the topic of candles and FWP, has anyone else noticed a decline in the quality of cheap candles? I never remembered any cheap candles in the past refusing to burn for more than a few minutes. I have some tea lights that simply won't stay lit.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:14 PM (FMtrg)

19 Candles are the future of home lighting in the era of sustainable energy

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 28, 2025 02:14 PM (JkO4W)

20 I have some tea lights that simply won't stay lit.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:14 PM (FMtrg)

Tea Lights are junk for the most part.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo [Flying the American Flag!] at September 28, 2025 02:15 PM (n9ltV)

21 There's a truck that comes around a few times a year to scrub the curbs clean. It passed by this week. Man is that thing loud.

Well, don't make us all guess. Did it at least clean your curb?

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 28, 2025 02:15 PM (JkO4W)

22
Kinda hard for a mormon to piss someone off, yes?

Why do I suspect "anti-mormon" is code for anti-Christian?

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:16 PM (yZua4)

23 Candles are the future of home lighting in the era of sustainable energy
Posted by: Cicero

Which is why I have two old timey oil lamps on my desk ready to go.

Posted by: Tonypete at September 28, 2025 02:16 PM (cYBz/)

24
Not a candle enthusiast. In the sanctuary of a church is the only place I want to see them.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:16 PM (tgvbd)

25 Mass shooting at a church in Michigan

Jimmy Kimmel has already linked it to MAGA

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 28, 2025 02:17 PM (JkO4W)

26
Candles are bee exploitation.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:17 PM (tgvbd)

27 My wife generally only burns candles during the Thanksgiving - Christmas period. Non-scented. She's not real fond of scented ones.

We have a fair stockpile of them too. A byproduct of power outages.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (Q4IgG)

28 Who did it better?

https://is.gd/AW9o3b

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack! at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (L/fGl)

29 Well, don't make us all guess. Did it at least clean your curb?

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 28, 2025 02:15 PM (JkO4W

No, for whatever reason, just the other side of the street. No cars on the street.

My side of the street just got screwed over. WTF?

Posted by: Posted by: Stateless - VERY GRATEFUL, BLESSED, LOVED AND HAPPY! -- - New Life Creation - 18.1% at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (Sco7b)

30 >>has anyone else noticed a decline in the quality of cheap candles?
--------

I stopped buying/burning candles when they started being made of whipped paraffin. I suppose the industry has found a cheap additive, to replace the 'incorporation of air' process, and/or sh1ttier wick material?

Posted by: JQ at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (rdVOm)

31 Not a candle enthusiast. In the sanctuary of a church is the only place I want to see them.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

The sound of coins dropping into the money box does wonders for this old man.

Posted by: Tonypete at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (cYBz/)

32
Your first world problem is that you're running out of liquor-oriented glasses. Mine is that I have too many.

Two people in my life never used their fancy glasses so they gave them to me. One set is a cheapish collection of about 8 goblets, the other is some crystal-like engraved set of tiny little sippers suitable for liqueurs that no one drinks. I was cleaning house yesterday and finally threw away all my old college papers that I myself haven't read in mumblety years so why do I think they'll be precious heirlooms, and I rounded up all the glasses and put them in my car to drop off the next time I'm driving by the Goodwill or the Cancer Society store.

There's a Useless Stemware Distribution System in the first world. Pay attention, people. The threat is real.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (n7CIX)

33 There are candles all over the house, a legacy of the late wife.
We've had no hurricane or snow power outages since.
The candles remain unlit.

Posted by: From about That Time at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (n4GiU)

34
You know what's faster than gay candles?
Incest sticks.

You want a quick aroma? Burn an incest stick. They come in hundreds of scents.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (yZua4)

35 We have a few o I l lamps if power goes out, happens about 1 time in 5 years

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:19 PM (+qU29)

36 Kinda hard for a mormon to piss someone off, yes?

Why do I suspect "anti-mormon" is code for anti-Christian?
Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:16 PM (yZua4)

Could be an ex-Mormon who has a grudge against the church

Posted by: Josephistan at September 28, 2025 02:19 PM (DFLxb)

37
For sustained power outages, we use solar lights.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:20 PM (tgvbd)

38 You want a quick aroma? Burn an incest stick. They come in hundreds of scents.

Posted by: Soothsayer

The Paolo, how you say, has known a few of those with incest sticks. They didn't survive the consequences.

Posted by: The Paolo at September 28, 2025 02:20 PM (cYBz/)

39 Could be an ex-Mormon who has a grudge against the church

Could be Mohammed Mohammed Mohammed swinging hard for those 72 virgins.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 28, 2025 02:21 PM (JkO4W)

40
"islamocommie goonfest"

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:21 PM (yZua4)

41 You know what's faster than gay candles?
Incest sticks.

You want a quick aroma? Burn an incest stick. They come in hundreds of scents.

----

Go on....

Posted by: House Lannister at September 28, 2025 02:21 PM (DFLxb)

42
Likely in league with the driver of the car sitting in the space, who is making a leisurely phone call.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

==============

That's the person who has to turn to the left and the right ten times to get their seatbelt fastened. Sort of like a dog that has to turn around in a circle five times on one spot before it lies down.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 02:22 PM (n7CIX)

43 Tea Lights are junk for the most part.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo [Flying the American Flag!] at September 28, 2025 02:15 PM (n9ltV)

But I think they used to burn much better than they do now.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:22 PM (FMtrg)

44 My late mother had a small collection of candles, including some of the really fancy ones. I found enough as I've been thoroughly cleaning and organizing the house the last THREE months...with occasional benders. Should be done this week FINALLY.

All the candles were donated or given away. I just don't need them.

Posted by: Posted by: Stateless - VERY GRATEFUL, BLESSED, LOVED AND HAPPY! -- - New Life Creation - 18.1% at September 28, 2025 02:24 PM (Sco7b)

45
Suspect in Grand Blanc LDS Church Shooting Posted Anti-Mormon Rants Before Fiery Attack
Posted by: Mister Ghost at September 28, 2025 02:08 PM (TGPs7)

_________

Not from Carthage, IL, is he?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:27 PM (tgvbd)

46 Aldi sells some very nice inexpensive scented candles.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 28, 2025 02:28 PM (XQo4F)

47 I think modern candles use some sort of soy sludge instead of wax.

Posted by: All Hail Eris,, coming to you live from the Roller Disco of Discord! at September 28, 2025 02:29 PM (kpS4V)

48 36 Kinda hard for a mormon to piss someone off, yes?
You must not know all the mormons I know. The group traits on the whole are mostly positive, but when that one guy I know gets in that one mode he gets in...ya vex me, Brudda!

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:30 PM (+Jojf)

49 I like an essential oil diffuser.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at September 28, 2025 02:31 PM (CA6zO)

50 26
Candles are bee exploitation.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:17 PM (tgvbd)

These days, it's soy exploitation.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:31 PM (FMtrg)

51 On the topic of candles and FWP, has anyone else noticed a decline in the quality of cheap candles? I never remembered any cheap candles in the past refusing to burn for more than a few minutes. I have some tea lights that simply won't stay lit.
Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:14 PM

I noticed. They're like cheap crayons. Vietnamese jar candles are okay, but not cheap. The "crackling wicks" are wood and burn fast.

I bought boxes of 8-hour tealights made from palm wax with cotton wicks. Each isn't strong enough to read by, but three in front of a mirror is perfect.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 02:31 PM (5m2gG)

52 49 I like an essential oil diffuser.

I had a vehicle like that once. Turns out it was the rear main seal.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:32 PM (+Jojf)

53 Candles?? Luxury! We had to stick wicks in ourears.

Posted by: fd at September 28, 2025 02:35 PM (vFG9F)

54 I recall oil lamps that were popular back in the 70's that used scented oils. They were shaped like old hurricane lamps, and similar, glass oil lamps from around the turn of the century.

(1900, not 2000 in case you were wondering.)

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 02:35 PM (Q4IgG)

55 " I think modern candles use some sort of soy sludge instead of wax.
Posted by: All Hail Eris,, coming to you live from the Roller Disco of Discord! "

Soylent Candles?

Posted by: fd at September 28, 2025 02:36 PM (vFG9F)

56 Buy more fruit preserves in the tiny jars.

Posted by: banana Dream at September 28, 2025 02:36 PM (3uBP9)

57 Confession: I didn't think I was a scented candle person. Then I marry someone who was and damned if I didn't get dragged into a make your own scented candle shop.

It ain't cheap, but it's fun. My first candle was mix of leather and I forget what else but I was going for my favorite smell in all the world: New baseball glove.

My son is from Oregon so I did him a candle of rain, patchouli, and cannabis. My sister is a crazy but not leftist cat lady so I put together something to mask that odor.

Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at September 28, 2025 02:36 PM (vKEG1)

58 I noticed. They're like cheap crayons.
Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 02:31 PM (5m2gG)

Thank you, NaughtyPine. I feel heard.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 02:37 PM (FMtrg)

59 53 Candles?? Luxury! We had to stick wicks in our ears.
You were lucky! We couldn't afford earwax. Had to get the police to shoot wax bullets at us and collect the fragments!

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:37 PM (+Jojf)

60
I think modern candles use some sort of soy sludge instead of wax.
Posted by: All Hail Eris

Yeah, They want to make more gays.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:38 PM (yZua4)

61 I have a couple hundred tea lights (very cheap at the time). Use them like night lights when power goes out.
That only happens a couple times a year. Usually hurricane related.

Nothing this year. So far.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at September 28, 2025 02:39 PM (/lPRQ)

62 My mother likes feesh so I cook it outside on the grill, in an aluminum pan lined with parchment paper.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 28, 2025 02:40 PM (ULPxl)

63 Candles became a required thing in California after SoCal Edison instituted rolling blackouts during Santa Ana season (Oct-December, typically). A few years back, they pulled our power the day before Thanksgiving. Had to bring my turkey to my friend's place in Camarillo to roast it. My neighborhood was dark for about a week...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at September 28, 2025 02:40 PM (nbLIj)

64 My 1WP is should do yard stuff but not feeling super

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:40 PM (+qU29)

65 Use ice to create swiss cheese pattern.

Posted by: Dreamingrobot at September 28, 2025 02:41 PM (uIXO9)

66 60
I think modern candles use some sort of soy sludge instead of wax.
Posted by: All Hail Eris

Yeah, They want to make more gays.
Don't know what all of thr effects arde, but that crap is in absolutely eveything inbthe middle of the grocery store.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:41 PM (+Jojf)

67 To light your scented candle you need a rechargeable plasma lighter.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 28, 2025 02:42 PM (XQo4F)

68 My FWP is those relatively new resealable plastic bags of things, nuts, dog treats, candy, etc. Sometimes, the seals are so tight you actually rip the seal from the bag before the seal unseals. Then you can't reveal it.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack! at September 28, 2025 02:42 PM (L/fGl)

69 You make your own candles ?? Ok....

Posted by: runner at September 28, 2025 02:43 PM (g47mK)

70 Also recycling bikini wax.

Posted by: Dreamingrobot at September 28, 2025 02:44 PM (uIXO9)

71 Oh, we dreamed of having wax bullets shot at us! We had to scavenge used dental floss from the dump and scrape the wax off with our teeth and use that. And we were glad of it!

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at September 28, 2025 02:44 PM (PiwSw)

72 Last two houses we, meaning myself, installed serious exhaust hoods for cooking stinky fish. First one was rated 700 cfm. That next was 1200 cfm.

When pulling that much air you have to have make-up intake, or open a window. It is powerful enough to pull air through a fireplace chimney and fill your house with smoke and ash in seconds... ask wife how we know this.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at September 28, 2025 02:44 PM (/lPRQ)

73 You had TEETH?

Posted by: fd at September 28, 2025 02:45 PM (vFG9F)

74 Talk about a FWP!

Starbucks announces hundreds of store closures and layoffs

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack! at September 28, 2025 02:46 PM (L/fGl)

75 oh, you know what helps ? Vinegar. Just a few bowls with vinegar around. I heard that works. Expecially with fish.

Posted by: runner at September 28, 2025 02:47 PM (g47mK)

76 Wow. I really hate seeing you having to deal with all of these hig-impact First Whirlled problems … have patience. Remember what the doctor told his constipated patient after administering the laxative dose: "All things shall pass" …

Posted by: Dr_No at September 28, 2025 02:47 PM (ayRl+)

77
Starbucks announces hundreds of store closures and layoffs
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack!

__________

Where am I going to get a cup of overpriced, horrible coffee???

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:47 PM (tgvbd)

78
Humanities grads hardest hit.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:48 PM (tgvbd)

79
Oddly enough, the cheapest candle I could find to stick in my jack-o-lantern last Halloween was a sickly-scented thing in a little glass. Perfect for putting in a pumpkin, because I didn't have to carefully prop it up with toothpicks.

The thing burned all night. Half of it was left. Being me, I had no choice but to bring the rest of it back in the house and put it in a drawer to use THIS year.

Every time I open that drawer, its sickly scent wafts through the house. A long year of patient suffering will be rewarded this October 31 when it lights another jack-o-lantern and burns all the way!

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 02:48 PM (n7CIX)

80 Not letting homeless destroy your business didn't save every store?

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:49 PM (+qU29)

81 @77
Starbucks announces hundreds of store closures and layoffs
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack!
__________

Where am I going to get a cup of overpriced, horrible coffee???
_____________________________________

Come to my place … I'll happily overcharge yez for bad cuppa …

Posted by: Dr_No at September 28, 2025 02:49 PM (ayRl+)

82 Dude...really? 16 Mason jars run under $20 at most of those Dollar stores.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (dIske)

83 Went into Starbucks, (Starbucks's, Starbux?), ordered a large cup of coffee, and they called me a drip!

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (+Jojf)

84
You know what I think is killing Strabucks?
The employees.

Tattooed. Nose piercings, etc. Bad attitude.

Nobody wants to see that shit, and nobody wants that shit touching their food.

Starbucks employee fatigue is real.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (yZua4)

85 2 So a bacon scented candle? Alrighty then

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 02:02 PM (VPPG

Save yer bacon grease, put a wick in it before it solidifies...instant bacon-flavored and scented candle!...
Well, not really...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (ynpvh)

86 84
You know what I think is killing Strabucks?
The employees.

Tattooed. Nose piercings, etc. Bad attitude.

Nobody wants to see that shit, and nobody wants that shit touching their food.

Starbucks employee fatigue is real.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (yZua4)

They can work at Chipotle and spread their Hep B to the customers...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (ynpvh)

87 Before electricity, how many candles did they need to light a room?

Posted by: dantesed at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (Oy/m2)

88 @22/Soothsayer: "Kinda hard for a mormon to piss someone off, yes?"

Have you heard of an author by the name of Larry Correia? :-)

Pissing leftists off is his entertainment between writing sessions on whatever book he's writing currently.

I've heard that he's quite kind and generous, IF you're not an idjit leftist trying to pick a fight with him, or tell him what he thinks, or tell him how to do what he knows to do in his fields (plural) of experience. He is a man of many talents, that one.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at September 28, 2025 02:51 PM (O7YUW)

89 OMG don't you know there's a wax shortage?? Candles or leaky toilets your call buckos!

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 02:51 PM (VPPG8)

90 78
Humanities grads hardest hit.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 02:48 PM (tgvbd)

Oh, the humanity!

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:51 PM (ynpvh)

91 75 oh, you know what helps ? Vinegar. Just a few bowls with vinegar around. I heard that works. Expecially with fish.
Posted by: runner at September 28, 2025 02:47 PM (g47mK)

I recall my mother leaving a saucer or two filled with ammonia for that purpose...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at September 28, 2025 02:52 PM (nbLIj)

92 87 Before electricity, how many candles did they need to light a room?

Posted by: dantesed at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (Oy/m2)

Just one and the whole room will be alight...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:52 PM (ynpvh)

93 No mentions of pumpkin spice scented candles?

Really?

*heavy sigh*

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 02:53 PM (Q4IgG)

94
When your twitter timeline occasionally shows you a Tik Tok goblin making a fool of herself, and then you walk into a food-serving establishment and see one of those goblins behind the counter, you're going to think twice about ingesting something that goblin handled.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:53 PM (yZua4)

95 Can't say only been to Starbucks once, now twice. Last convention wanted a coffee and Starbucks was it, did get a plain cup so was ok

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:53 PM (+qU29)

96 93 No mentions of pumpkin spice scented candles?

Really?

*heavy sigh*
Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 02:53 PM (Q4IgG)

Or Gwyneth Paltrow.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at September 28, 2025 02:54 PM (PiwSw)

97 *set alight.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:54 PM (ynpvh)

98 Period movies 1 candle lights up the whole room

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 02:54 PM (+qU29)

99
They can work at Chipotle and spread their Hep B to the customers...
Posted by: jim

Quiznos, too!

Fuck that place.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:54 PM (yZua4)

100 Before electricity, how many candles did they need to light a room?
Posted by: dantesed

One. If you were rich.
Otherwise you went to bed when it got dark.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at September 28, 2025 02:54 PM (/lPRQ)

101 pumpkin is a strange word; sounds like something a redneck family does.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:55 PM (ynpvh)

102 Starbucks concept was a good one, Schultz wanted to bring Italian style coffee experience to the US. On a mass scale. Before we maybe had a few coffee shops, here and ther, more so in college towns, where you could hang out, do your studies , work on slides , meet up you crew, do a first date, whatever. Then ugly things happened. Bo woke , go broke. It is still a good concept.

Posted by: runner at September 28, 2025 02:55 PM (g47mK)

103 Save yer bacon grease, put a wick in it before it solidifies...instant bacon-flavored and scented candle!...
Well, not really...
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (ynpvh)

Cool and just slap labels on em and take them to the Dearborn flea market.
https://tinyurl.com/4tdawnxk

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 02:56 PM (VPPG8)

104 I see CBD has discovered communism.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 28, 2025 02:56 PM (zZu0s)

105 I recall my mother leaving a saucer or two filled with ammonia for that purpose...
Posted by: Joe Kidd at September 28, 2025 02:52 PM (nbLIj)

👀

Posted by: runner at September 28, 2025 02:57 PM (g47mK)

106 103 Save yer bacon grease, put a wick in it before it solidifies...instant bacon-flavored and scented candle!...
Well, not really...
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:50 PM (ynpvh)

Cool and just slap labels on em and take them to the Dearborn flea market.
https://tinyurl.com/4tdawnxk

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 02:56 PM (VPPG

Dearborn flea market probably smells like Mohammed's armpits...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:57 PM (ynpvh)

107 97 *set alight
He ride a set-alight saddle!
Kinda works.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:57 PM (+Jojf)

108
Have you heard of an author by the name of Larry Correia? :-)

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant

Is that what he is. The only time I've seen his name is associated with a tweet, so I figured he was just a professional tweeter agitator.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:57 PM (yZua4)

109 They shouldn't have said, You'll have flying cars in the next decade. Which of course changed the course of my life.
That was back, well you know.
These Marxist imped evolution.

Posted by: Dreamingrobot at September 28, 2025 02:58 PM (uIXO9)

110 I have 4 good towels that I love to use in the shower. I'm able to dry myself, then the shower doors, then the shower in one pass with no streaks.

I've looked a bit for replacements but everything is microfiber and huge. Pretty good but not the same.

Posted by: Posted by: Stateless - VERY GRATEFUL, BLESSED, LOVED AND HAPPY! -- - New Life Creation - 18.1% at September 28, 2025 02:58 PM (Sco7b)

111 107 97 *set alight
He ride a set-alight saddle!
Kinda works.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:57 PM (+Jojf)

Make a man a fire, keep him warm for a night; set a man on fire, keep him warm for the rest of his life...--Terry Pratchet

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:58 PM (ynpvh)

112
Not a good idea to leave saucers of vinegar laying around. Believe me now, or believe me later when you knock the dish off the counter.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 02:58 PM (yZua4)

113 Friend just got back from NYC. His brother (lib) and others are terrified of Mandami, think he will be a disaster. Admit DeBlasio was a disaster. Say Guiliani went "too far," Bloomberg was "just right."

Posted by: Goldilocks and the Three Marxist Bears at September 28, 2025 02:58 PM (qUkBO)

114 Beeswax candles made in FL:
https://ambrosiancandles.com/

Nick Cage hardest hit.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 28, 2025 02:59 PM (ULPxl)

115 meet up you crew
Heh. First read that as "med-up your crew".

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 02:59 PM (+Jojf)

116 I used to shoot over to Yankee Candle every so often when I lived up in New England. The candles were over priced, but I still shelled out a few bucks if I saw something intriguing or innovative. The had one called Mmmmm Bacon...which I got and had to admit. Yup, that smells like hickory bacon.

I can recall one Halloween they tried something a little different (it was during the whole Harry Potter era). They created Halloween candles that were repulsive (like the jelly beans in Potter). Just some examples...Old Sweat Socks, Something's Rotting in the Fridge, Lactose Intolerant, etc. You get the idea. I don't know why they didn't continue doing it. They were selling well.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 03:01 PM (dIske)

117 My FWP was averted. Mower threw a rock at a window but no damage. Phew!

I got paid last week and was able to fend off other problems, like filling the tank. I was shocked to find - by accident - that the main-drag gas stations in the neighboring town were 30 cents cheaper. That's the fancy place where people go to shop, drink expensive coffee, and watch plays. I thought it'd be higher.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 03:01 PM (5m2gG)

118 [snip] 30 cents cheaper. That's the fancy place where people go to shop, drink expensive coffee, and watch plays. I thought it'd be higher.
_-_
Probably have to do that to get people to take the extra risk...

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 03:03 PM (+Jojf)

119 Old mugs make great containers for candles - very sturdy and you get a handle for carrying them around, which is useful for emergency situations. Plus it gives a purpose to those mugs you don't use but that have sentimental value!

As to vent hoods - this is a giant pet peeve for me after I learned new builders dont vent the vent hoods out of the house - they are designed to "filter" cooking air. They do nothing, but it looks like there is a vent because a fake one is nailed to the ceiling. Cost cutting at its finest.

Posted by: moki at September 28, 2025 03:04 PM (wLjpr)

120
soooo...this happened

Hollywood decided it was a good idea to make a quasi pro-antifa movie, and then decided now is a good time to release it in theaters. It flopped.

Leo Dicraprio is in it, and you'll never what kind of wife he has! Not a man-wife, but the next best woke thing: a super-smart black wife with attitude.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:04 PM (yZua4)

121 Leo Dicraprio is in it, and you'll never what kind of wife he has! Not a man-wife, but the next best woke thing: a super-smart black wife with attitude.
Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:04 PM (yZua4)

So what you're saying is Leo DiCaprio is transphobic....

Posted by: That BBC Presenter at September 28, 2025 03:05 PM (PiwSw)

122 they are designed to "filter" cooking air.
_-_
aka get the smoke alarm to stop beeping

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 03:05 PM (+Jojf)

123 Might as well inhale a pack of cigs if you are going to burn candles in your house. Same effect on your lungs.

Posted by: Pete at September 28, 2025 03:06 PM (i4riO)

124 As to vent hoods - this is a giant pet peeve for me after I learned new builders dont vent the vent hoods out of the house - they are designed to "filter" cooking air. They do nothing, but it looks like there is a vent because a fake one is nailed to the ceiling. Cost cutting at its finest.
Posted by: moki at September 28, 2025

I see you viewed my home before I bought it. I had no idea until the first time I caramelized onions.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 03:06 PM (5m2gG)

125 As to vent hoods - this is a giant pet peeve for me after I learned new builders dont vent the vent hoods out of the house - they are designed to "filter" cooking air. They do nothing, but it looks like there is a vent because a fake one is nailed to the ceiling. Cost cutting at its finest.
Posted by: moki

The metal hoods are a fire code requirement.
Exhaust is not a requirement under any residential code that unaware of... So the fan just blows the odors back in your face.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at September 28, 2025 03:06 PM (/lPRQ)

126
In the movie I mention above, there are scenes with attacks on ICE detention buildings. Yeah, hollywood made this love-letter justification of the Democrat party's antifa terror wing, and released it this weekend.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:06 PM (yZua4)

127 This is definitely a first world problem and a personal gripe. I look at YT fairly often, mostly about literature and hobby stuff. Those channels aren't the problem. What's annoying are the thumbnails for other channels that keep popping up with obnoxiously exaggerated facial expressions (pop eyes, stupid outfits, over the top captions) and misleading photos that have nothing to do with the alleged topic. Even medical 'news'. If I were interested in those things I would be insulted that this was needed to get my attention. I don't like the click bait approach to serious matters; it's, at best, dishonest.

This may not be hugely consequential but it is annoying and points to a culture aimed at children even when the topics are for adults. If it's not bright and loud no one will notice? Save it for kids' breakfast cereal commercials.

Mini rant off.

Posted by: JTB at September 28, 2025 03:07 PM (yTvNw)

128 There's a truck that comes around a few times a year to scrub the curbs clean. It passed by this week. Man is that thing loud.
Posted by: Posted by: Stateless

You can tell us scrub the curb is a euphenism for something naughty, right?

Posted by: Mind In the Gutter at September 28, 2025 03:07 PM (oftw2)

129 >>>>Could be Mohammed Mohammed Mohammed swinging hard for those 72 virgins.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43)
---------

Maybe he thought he could double or triple the count?

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 28, 2025 03:08 PM (OS3X9)

130 Was bound to happen with CBD in France. Probably was stuck with candles for lighting many nights with rationed electricity

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 03:11 PM (+qU29)

131 114 Beeswax candles made in FL:
https://ambrosiancandles.com/

Nick Cage hardest hit.
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 28, 2025 02:59 PM (ULPxl)

That is an excellent price, Helena! You have the best internet shopping skills!

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at September 28, 2025 03:11 PM (FMtrg)

132 No one puts nicotine in candles, do they?

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (+qU29)

133 124 As to vent hoods - this is a giant pet peeve for me after I learned new builders dont vent the vent hoods out of the house - they are designed to "filter" cooking air. They do nothing, but it looks like there is a vent because a fake one is nailed to the ceiling. Cost cutting at its finest.
Posted by: moki at September 28, 2025

I see you viewed my home before I bought it. I had no idea until the first time I caramelized onions.
Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 03:06 PM (5m2gG)
____________________________

I speak from experience on this. There was a big push a few years ago for local municipalities to require a certain level of ventilation on stove hoods. Failure to do so properly is a building violation. This was, primarily, aimed at gas stoves for obvious health reasons. But, if your municipality adopted the legislation (which a lot did), then you can get it fixed (for free by the builder) and the builder probably gets a fine on top of that.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (dIske)

134 I just heard the Starbucks restructuring story. As usual, the Moron News Network is faster than national news.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (5m2gG)

135 OT

People say clunky things (write.)

Tapscott over at Insty says 'One need not be a Jesus follower on the Right...'

That is clunky as hell. It just looks wrong.

'One need not be a conservative follower of Jesus (I'd use Christ.)...'

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (zZu0s)

136 DiCaprio gets older, but his wives stay the same age.

Posted by: gKWVE at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (gKWVE)

137 FWP - Wherd are the paper maps? I want a paper map! I know where I am, just wat to locate the next destination and figure out how to get there on my own. My sisters and I took a trip together, and for every single place we visited, they wanted to turn on those annoying turn-by-turn voice announcements! Aaaargh!

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (+Jojf)

138 If it's not bright and loud no one will notice? Save it for kids' breakfast cereal commercials.

Posted by: JTB
----

blinking, must be blinking

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (OS3X9)

139 Rwanda has flying cars.

Posted by: gKWVE at September 28, 2025 03:13 PM (gKWVE)

140
My coffee pot was broken so I had to drive thru Starbucks for a few mornings. Those people are trained to be chirpy and friendly and morning glory to the max. They might have piercings and colored hair, but they know customer service talk. The speakers are minimal static, and you don't have to grapple with incomprehensible accents.

I also discovered that for a plain brew (not an espresso drink), the price is the same for every size. So splash out! Get yourself a venti Pike Place with extra cream!

THAT said, I'm glad I got a new coffee pot. Pays for itself vs daily Starbucks in a week.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:14 PM (n7CIX)

141 No one puts nicotine in candles, do they?
Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 03:12 PM (+qU29)

That is one of their downsides.

Cigarettes win.

Also, I always thought they smelled good both lit and unlit.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 28, 2025 03:14 PM (zZu0s)

142 I was in a SBUX not long ago and saw a purple hair with a nose ring. Typical employee. Except she was smoking hot. Body, face the works.

And I thought damn girl you’re wasting your talents working here.

Posted by: Its Go Time Donald at September 28, 2025 03:15 PM (wrRTB)

143 The guy who shot up the Mormon church is dead. Not only did a local cop go after him but a DNR officer, too. When I was a kid, most of the young hooligans were more worried about getting pulled over by DNR than any police officer.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 28, 2025 03:17 PM (5m2gG)

144 venti Pike Place
_-_-_
That's where they lose me. Old, traditionally-dressed guy like me comes in and asks for a large cup of coffee, they should kinda get that and fill-up a cup and hand it over.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 03:17 PM (+Jojf)

145 We had a vented range hood. Then, we got an over stove microwave that vented back inside. That's not the biggest issue we had.

No, blocking off the old vent, eventually removing it altogether during a roof replacement was the biggest issue. Bugs, especially wasps, loved to nest in the unused tube.

Nothing quite like opening a cabinet over the stove and having 2 dozen wasps looking back at you.

Was years ago. We still open that cabinet periodically just "to make sure."

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 03:18 PM (Q4IgG)

146 Glad you put a wick in it or I'd try to drink it!

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at September 28, 2025 03:20 PM (36PRH)

147 2 dozen wasps looking back at you.

_-_
Very fun to watch, though.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at September 28, 2025 03:20 PM (+Jojf)

148
Posted by: JTB at September 28, 2025 03:07 PM (yTvNw)

============

Those YouTube thumbnails and captions drive me crazy, too. Those wild faces are shot in batches and then stuck in for any and every topic. Even the ones on our side are doing it, like Benny Johnson. "Conservative DEEESSTROYYYS Mamdani!!!" Really? I think Mamdani's still around.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:21 PM (n7CIX)

149 Mr. Dildo, doesn't Gwyneth Paltrow, a lurker and infrequent commentator here, sell high-end scented candles that might be the solution to your problem?

Posted by: Duncanthrax, a mid-tier AoSHQ commenter, according to Grok at September 28, 2025 03:23 PM (0sNs1)

150 @148 I'm DESTROYING a piece of chicken right now.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM (36PRH)

151 If you are a government body and you are bad to christians, that makes you a bad government to all.

Posted by: Dreamingrobot at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM (P/9oj)

152 My FWP of the weekend was a small one, but annoying nonetheless. The battery for the remote control for my ceiling fan died, and of course they didn't go with a standard AAA or AA. Nope, it was an A23, so I had to go to the battery and bulb store to get a replacement. I bought two - and marked the package so I'd remember what the extra one is for when the first one dies. Hopefully it'll still have some charge.

Posted by: PabloD at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM (1HNVY)

153 105 I recall my mother leaving a saucer or two filled with ammonia for that purpose...
Posted by: Joe Kidd at September 28, 2025 02:52 PM (nbLIj)

👀
Posted by: runner
----------

Ammonia candles all around the house.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM (OS3X9)

154 Just chopped up an 8lbs pork butt into 3 parts for freezing and dinner. I really need to find a good sharpening system, my knives are crap dull. I was too lazy to smoke the dinner portion, so liquid smoke it is.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM (mlg/3)

155 149 - he wants it to NOT smell like fish....

Posted by: PabloD at September 28, 2025 03:25 PM (1HNVY)

156 @ 137 FWP - Wherd are the paper maps? I want a paper map! I know where I am, just wat to locate the next destination and figure out how to get there on my own. My sisters and I took a trip together, and for every single place we visited, they wanted to turn on those annoying turn-by-turn voice announcements! Aaaargh!
__________________________

If you ever give in to the delusion that you can 'get lost' and be 'unfindable', listen to Waze or Google Maps nag you when you don't follow their directions to the letter. They know. We don't. That said, I still have many outdated paper road maps from my time on the road during the '70s. They're good for getting me from one town to the next. The piddly new ones - who cares? Waze, however, has nicer female voices than Google …

Posted by: Dr_No at September 28, 2025 03:25 PM (ayRl+)

157
That's where they lose me. Old, traditionally-dressed guy like me comes in and asks for a large cup of coffee, they should kinda get that and fill-up a cup and hand it over.
Posted by: Don in SoCo

=============

Oh, they do. I'm just using venti and Pike Place to convey the maximal luxury that you can get for the minimal price.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:25 PM (n7CIX)

158
Somehow the SBUX model is beyond me. When I want a cup of coffee, I want some ordinary joe, not pumpkin spice vanilla latte soy half whip. But their ordinary joe is terrible.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:26 PM (tgvbd)

159 I really need to find a good sharpening system, my knives are crap dull. I was too lazy to smoke the dinner portion, so liquid smoke it is.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at September 28, 2025 03:24 PM

Two words: Spyderco SharpMaker.

Posted by: Duncanthrax, a mid-tier AoSHQ commenter, according to Grok at September 28, 2025 03:26 PM (0sNs1)

160 Nothing quite like opening a cabinet over the stove and having 2 dozen wasps looking back at you.

Was years ago. We still open that cabinet periodically just "to make sure."
Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 03:18 PM (Q4IgG)

That's a run fron the house screaming, set explosives, blow it, and burn what's left situation.

Gah.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 28, 2025 03:27 PM (zZu0s)

161
The Texans are actually playing a team worse than them.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:28 PM (tgvbd)

162 But their ordinary joe is terrible.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:26 PM

That's because 70+% of their 'beverages' are milk-based drinks, and they horribly over-roast their beans to get some coffee flavor punching through the milk and other flavorings.

Order their 'Blonde' roast. It's marginally drinkable.

Posted by: Duncanthrax, a mid-tier AoSHQ commenter, according to Grok at September 28, 2025 03:29 PM (0sNs1)

163 I find that little ozone generators like the EdenPure Thunderstorm are great at eliminating strong kitchen odors like cooked fish.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at September 28, 2025 03:30 PM (4tFle)

164 > FWP - Wherd are the paper maps?
--------------
We have a 2023 Rand-McNally spiral bound, large format North America Road Atlas that travels with us. Not particularly cheap, needs to be updated with a newer one in 2026, but easy to read in the vehicles when the nav system is borked.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 03:30 PM (Q4IgG)

165 Order their 'Blonde' roast. It's marginally drinkable.

Posted by: Duncanthrax, a mid-tier AoSHQ commenter, according to Grok at September 28, 2025 03:29 PM (0sNs1)

Marginally. And their espresso is drinkable. Not great, but not awful like their coffee.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo [Flying the American Flag!] at September 28, 2025 03:30 PM (n9ltV)

166
Somehow the SBUX model is beyond me. When I want a cup of coffee, I want some ordinary joe, not pumpkin spice vanilla latte soy half whip. But their ordinary joe is terrible.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

==============

I discovered something: McDonald's has a totally acceptable cuppa joe for 1/3 the price of SBUX.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:31 PM (n7CIX)

167 @ 154 Just chopped up an 8lbs pork butt into 3 parts for freezing and dinner. I really need to find a good sharpening system, my knives are crap dull. I was too lazy to smoke the dinner portion, so liquid smoke it is.
_____________________

Sharpening system? Go online and do a search for 'Japanese Water Stones' - and get a grade comparison guide if the site offers one.

Alternative: Ace Hardware, a silicone carbide whetstone, and a can of 3-in-1 oil … seemsayin' … ?

Liquid Smoke is its own tiny marvel - just don't drink it straight from the bottle (ask me how I know).

Posted by: Dr_No at September 28, 2025 03:32 PM (ayRl+)

168 Celebrity News: Mr. Swift and his football game will be watched by Taylor today.

Posted by: AoSHQ Celebrity News Bureau and Rumour Centre at September 28, 2025 03:32 PM (0sNs1)

169
FWP - Wherd are the paper maps?

_________

HM keeps a Rand-McNally atlas in the RV. We were once driving from Cincinnati to Louisville and instead of the interstate the navigator wanted to send us through places like Burgoo, Possum Snot and Mushrat Dell.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:34 PM (tgvbd)

170 Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 03:30 PM (Q4IgG)

Dad buys a laminated one every year. I think the man knows every road in the US by heart, but he drives with an atlas and gps every trip and has as long as I have been alive (the map at least.)

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 28, 2025 03:36 PM (zZu0s)

171
discovered something: McDonald's has a totally acceptable cuppa joe for 1/3 the price of SBUX.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:31 PM (n7CIX)

_________

Not only is Buc-ee's coffee good, but it's the same good at every Buc-ee's.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:36 PM (tgvbd)

172 The Texans are actually playing a team worse than them.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

HOU has a good defense. It's the offense which has struggled, until 4Q today.

Posted by: gKWVE at September 28, 2025 03:38 PM (gKWVE)

173 Not only is Buc-ee's coffee good, but it's the same good at every Buc-ee's.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:36 PM

Concur.

Posted by: Duncanthrax, who "represents the geek-conservative archetype in AoSHQ's ecosystem", according to Gro at September 28, 2025 03:38 PM (0sNs1)

174 he navigator wanted to send us through places like Burgoo, Possum Snot and Mushrat Dell.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:34 PM

You don't care for banjo music?

Posted by: Duncanthrax, who represents the "geek-conservative" archetype in AoSHQ's ecosystem, according to Gro at September 28, 2025 03:40 PM (0sNs1)

175 Bath and body works has an annual 3 wick candle sale. I stock up then. The cranberry and the citrus scented ones are the best imho.

Posted by: lin-duh: I'm offended! at September 28, 2025 03:40 PM (nKjbR)

176
The Texans are playing the Cowboys???

Posted by: naturalfake at September 28, 2025 03:41 PM (ktiKM)

177
Beeswax candles made in FL:
https://ambrosiancandles.com

Do they smell like bees?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at September 28, 2025 03:42 PM (63Dwl)

178 I'm of the belief that if you want to live to be 100 years old, then you should include a daily stop at some gas station or convenience store for your coffee needs. It might not taste too great, but medicine seldom does.

They never clean those coffee machines. As a result, they have voluminous different forms of bacteria just hovering inside the nozzle. Over time, your body develops long lasting natural immunity to what I like to call "percolator of death controlled poisoning." It's an old snake charmer technique. Get the snake to bite you enough times and the poison loses it's effect.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 03:42 PM (dIske)

179 Texans are playing Shelbyville

Posted by: gKWVE at September 28, 2025 03:43 PM (gKWVE)

180 Your gonna be smellin candles when yer livin in a van down by the river

Posted by: Captain Fantastic at September 28, 2025 03:44 PM (VPPG8)

181 Do you break the wine glass when you use it as a candleholder? Why not re-use?

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 03:44 PM (Dvcu+)

182 HM keeps a Rand-McNally atlas in the RV. We were once driving from Cincinnati to Louisville and instead of the interstate the navigator wanted to send us through places like Burgoo, Possum Snot and Mushrat Dell.
______________________________

And you missed the opportunity to be told 'Now skweel lak a pig!' … that'll never come again, y' know.

Posted by: Dr_No at September 28, 2025 03:45 PM (ayRl+)

183 I keep a half dozen or so cheap dollar store candles around for storm candle use. Get the ones in the glass that looks like a fresnel lens, because it will amplify light like a fresnel lens. The scent isn't much but some will burn about 10 hours. A friend gave me a wax melter to cut down on smoking order, and if you put one of the cubes in the melted candle wax it will enhance the smell.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at September 28, 2025 03:45 PM (gm9Sb)

184
It's an old snake charmer technique. Get the snake to bite you enough times and the poison loses it's effect.
Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 03:42 PM (dIske)

__________

I see little kids at dog shows with their parents who are showing and think that, between and among, those kids will live forever.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 28, 2025 03:46 PM (tgvbd)

185 Asked AI how much caffeine was in a cup of coffee.
Its response, depends on the size of the cup.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 28, 2025 03:47 PM (OS3X9)

186 @108/Soothsayer: "Is that what he is. The only time I've seen his name is associated with a tweet, so I figured he was just a professional tweeter agitator."

If you're interested in finding out what his writing style is, his first book "Monster Hunter International" is available for free at Baen Books:

https://tinyurl.com/c5a5bf58

No signup required for the free book either (rather sporting of them.)

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at September 28, 2025 03:48 PM (O7YUW)

187 Do you break the wine glass when you use it as a candleholder? Why not re-use?

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 03:44 PM (Dvcu+)

The heat and flame usually stains the glass enough that it is a pain to clean. Plus, I glue the wick base into the bottom of the glass, so removing that is difficult without breaking the glass.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo [Flying the American Flag!] at September 28, 2025 03:49 PM (n9ltV)

188
lol, what such lolcows

kalama harris' ghost-ridden book includes an "amusing" revelation of her family's SS code names. She says the kids were allowed to choose their own name as long as it began with a P.

Her hairy-armpitted weirdo step-daughter Ella chose...

"Pickle!"

And that's how audio-AI reads it -- like it was so very funny & charming. Pickle!

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:49 PM (yZua4)

189 182 Toad Suck, AR. Real place.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at September 28, 2025 03:49 PM (gm9Sb)

190 I bought a couple of those 24hr emergency candles for hurricane season a few years ago. We have yet to use them.

Posted by: toby928 at September 28, 2025 03:50 PM (jc0TO)

191
Not only is Buc-ee's coffee good, but it's the same good at every Buc-ee's.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

================

There are no Buc-ee's in California, which may actually be a Third World Problem.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 03:50 PM (n7CIX)

192 Glad you put a wick in it or I'd try to drink it!
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at September 28, 2025 03:20 PM (36PRH)

Honestly, based on the pic, I thought he had encountered dissolving stirrer sticks in his Kahlua or something.

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 03:50 PM (Dvcu+)

193
btw, what she omits is that SHE too chose her SS code name. Offuckingcourse she did. They all can, if they want.

And she CHOSE "Pioneer." She picked it. But she pretends it just happened to be the name SS gave her. Everything is still fake with this phony dooshbag.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:51 PM (yZua4)

194 I bought a couple of those 24hr emergency candles for hurricane season a few years ago. We have yet to use them.
Posted by: toby928

If you do need them, you'll be glad you have them.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 28, 2025 03:52 PM (Q9Vcs)

195 Could have chosen Platypus. Freak of nature, somewhat poisonous.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at September 28, 2025 03:52 PM (gm9Sb)

196 glue the wick base into the bottom of the glass
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo [Flying the American Flag!] at September 28, 2025 03:49 PM (n9ltV)

Drill a hole in a small Euro coin, thread the wick through and knot it on the underside, then settle that in the bottom. Much nicer, and you can use different countries in all your candles and make it a conversation piece.

Also, it can then confuse people with the ones where you use a wiretapping bug....

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 03:52 PM (Dvcu+)

197 185 Asked AI how much caffeine was in a cup of coffee.
Its response, depends on the size of the cup.
Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 28, 2025 03:47 PM (OS3X9)
_________________________

Oh, man. That's an AI Burn. They are too human already.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 03:53 PM (dIske)

198 > We were once driving from Cincinnati to Louisville and instead of the interstate the navigator wanted to send us through places like Burgoo, Possum Snot and Mushrat Dell.
---------
I'd rather take my chances with the local traffic in and around "Possum Snot" than any interstate. Just have to beware of potential Amish buggies.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 28, 2025 03:53 PM (Q4IgG)

199 I'm going to make me some emergency heat candles that can also be used as firestarters for my Get Home Bag. Altoids tins, sealed with wax once complete, 3 wicks.

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 03:54 PM (Dvcu+)

200
Imagine the idiots at Secret Service forced to say "Pickle" over the comms because an emotionally-stunted weirdo forever-tween girl decided she wanted that as her code name.

No wonder President Trump got shot in the head.

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:54 PM (yZua4)

201 My new neighbor likes to cut out the mufflers from his vehicles and straight pipe them, for minimum neighborliness. He bought his girlfriend some little coupe. Nothing special, i think its something Korean IIRC. Two days later... loud as a fuckin' semi.

His driveway is pretty near our bedroom, and our daughter's, so for good measure, he makes sure that one of those vehicles is pulling in, or out, or simply idling at all hours of day or night.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at September 28, 2025 03:54 PM (O6U33)

202
lol @ emergency candles

How do you find your "emergency" matches?

Or do You People have "emergency" lighters rtg?

Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:56 PM (yZua4)

203 199 Get the can your C Ration peanut butter came in, put in a pinch of C4 and it will burn a long time. Or just burn the C Ration peanut butter.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at September 28, 2025 03:56 PM (gm9Sb)

204 Bacon grease candle. TA DAH!!!

Posted by: Eromero at September 28, 2025 03:58 PM (LHPAg)

205 So, is that like four fingers of candle wax?

Posted by: Paco at September 28, 2025 03:58 PM (mADJX)

206 FOOD FIGHT

Posted by: Skip at September 28, 2025 04:01 PM (+qU29)

207 They should have picked for her. Polyp. Putrescence. Something fitting.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at September 28, 2025 04:01 PM (BI5O2)

208 NOOD Deadly Mushrooms

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at September 28, 2025 04:01 PM (/HDaX)

209 Rabbit Hash Kentucky is a cute little place on the river with a dog for the mayor.

Posted by: Megthered at September 28, 2025 04:01 PM (kueL3)

210 lol @ emergency candles

How do you find your "emergency" matches?

Or do You People have "emergency" lighters rtg?
Posted by: Soothsayer

Ferro rod & dryer lint.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 28, 2025 04:01 PM (Q9Vcs)

211 lol @ emergency candles

How do you find your "emergency" matches?

Or do You People have "emergency" lighters rtg?
Posted by: Soothsayer at September 28, 2025 03:56 PM (yZua4)

Well, I put my emergency matches AND my emergency lighter by the emergency candles. And I use my EDC flashlight to find those in the dark. The emergency candles I'm going to make for my GHB will be IN the GHB, along with a lighter. And that's in my car, behind the driver's seat.

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 04:02 PM (Dvcu+)

212
A bit OT, but I just read Powerline's (sympathetic) summary of Andy McCarthy's (disapproving) take on the Comey indictment. I had to draw myself a picture and I still don't get it.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 04:02 PM (n7CIX)

213 28 Who did it better?

https://is.gd/AW9o3b
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, [0] Day(s) Since Leftist Terror Attack! at September 28, 2025 02:18 PM (L/fGl)
Abigail Spamberger's a guy right? Am I right?

Posted by: Eromero at September 28, 2025 04:05 PM (LHPAg)

214 Nooded, BTW

Posted by: GWB at September 28, 2025 04:06 PM (Dvcu+)

215 During The Storm, I relied not only on one of these (from my camping gear) but also on the bare spare candles for it (they come in 3 packs) that I had on hand.
https://shorturl.at/f1GJf

9 hrs/candle.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 28, 2025 04:16 PM (XeU6L)

216 You can make a candle from a big old tub of Crisco.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 28, 2025 04:18 PM (XQo4F)

217 101 pumpkin is a strange word; sounds like something a redneck family does.
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at September 28, 2025 02:55 PM (ynpvh)
Well now, let's just hold up there.

Posted by: Eromero at September 28, 2025 04:19 PM (LHPAg)

218 A bit OT, but I just read Powerline's (sympathetic) summary of Andy McCarthy's (disapproving) take on the Comey indictment. I had to draw myself a picture and I still don't get it.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 28, 2025 04:02 PM (n7CIX)
___________________

That evaluation by McCarthy is made based on what is known and only what is known. There's a pesky little issue called "corroborating evidence." I still think what was in those "forgotten" burn bags, and the multitude of self-posterior protecting whistleblowers will have a big part to play in that case.

The whole basis of McCarthy's position was based on McCabe making the call, and Comey playing dumb. Failure to give thought to those two concocting this approach is amateur night IMO.

Posted by: Orson at September 28, 2025 04:25 PM (dIske)

219 the picture I have of Andy McCarthy is a stick figure with a blindfold sitting on a big sack with a "$oro$" drawn on it
I'm not a good artist

Posted by: gKWVE at September 28, 2025 04:25 PM (gKWVE)

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