First-World Problems...

Looks normal...right? That's the bit holder on a drill-driver I used to loosen the bolt assembly screw on a Savage rifle. The damned thing is tightened at the factory to a ridiculous degree, and it's impossible to remove by hand. 1/4" hex in the bit holder and zip...zip...zip. Nice and easy, and I can now clean the bolt assembly easily.

Except...The bit holder won't come out! That collar slides up and down just fine...locking and unlocking the holder, but it is jammed so tight that I cannot remove it. Those streaks on the bit holder are from the teeth of my vice!

Yes, we'll just have to sell the house and move.

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:00 PM (fwDg9)

2 First world problems

Posted by: Pete Bog at March 24, 2024 02:00 PM (B5mgJ)

3 FIRST!
@ Those streaks on the bit holder are from the teeth of my vice!
__________

Umm ... shouldn't that be 'vise' ... ?

Posted by: Dr_No at March 24, 2024 02:02 PM (ayRl+)

4 First! Wp

Posted by: Pete Bog at March 24, 2024 02:02 PM (B5mgJ)

5 I'll go let 'em know about CBD's issues.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at March 24, 2024 02:02 PM (qPw5n)

6 Sucks to be you

Posted by: Martini Farmer at March 24, 2024 02:03 PM (Q4IgG)

7 Try putting tip in and running in reverse, a screw that is hard to get out will be best bet.

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:03 PM (fwDg9)

8 Disappeared then returned. A mystery.

Posted by: Pete Bog at March 24, 2024 02:03 PM (B5mgJ)

9 Or not, Skip was on the job.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at March 24, 2024 02:03 PM (qPw5n)

10 AOP to the courtesy phone phone please.

Posted by: Rufus T. Firefly at March 24, 2024 02:03 PM (5J0gB)

11 My impact screwgun gets jambed and often need to bang the tip left and right to get it to come out

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:04 PM (fwDg9)

12 First world problems? There's a sailboat parked on the beach. I wonder if the captain used his waze app on his cellphone instead of looking at the damned chart.

Idiot.

Posted by: nurse ratched at March 24, 2024 02:04 PM (PavmY)

13 @ 8 Disappeared then returned. A mystery.
____________

Maybe it's an 'Easter Kinda Thang' ... ?

Posted by: Dr_No at March 24, 2024 02:04 PM (ayRl+)

14 It's a vise. A vice is something else entirely.

Posted by: Jim at March 24, 2024 02:05 PM (zhWvq)

15 Just got off roof cleaning off sticks and gutters

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:05 PM (fwDg9)

16 3 FIRST!
@ Those streaks on the bit holder are from the teeth of my vice!
__________

Umm ... shouldn't that be 'vise' ... ?

Posted by: Dr_No at March 24, 2024 02:02 PM (ayRl+)

Words mean whatever I want them to mean!

Posted by: Jim at March 24, 2024 02:06 PM (zhWvq)

17 In order:

a) Bigger hammer
b) Bigger lever
c) Have you tried turning it off and on again? (hat tip to Pixy's world)
d) Gas "wrench" (torch)
e) The proper application of high explosives.
f) Thermite
g) A trip to the store to buy another one.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at March 24, 2024 02:06 PM (qPw5n)

18 Time to replace that drill with one made in the last 30 years. 😁

Posted by: Chairman LMAO, AI Expert at March 24, 2024 02:07 PM (snyZJ)

19 I guess you'll just have to leave it there and buy another one.
Problem solved.

Posted by: Dr. Claw at March 24, 2024 02:07 PM (roH4R)

20 @ 16 3 FIRST!

Words mean whatever I want them to mean!
_________

That's SO 'Alice in Wünderland' ... but it works ...

Posted by: Dr_No at March 24, 2024 02:07 PM (ayRl+)

21 Uh, just one phone sir, thank you

Posted by: Rufus T. Firefly at March 24, 2024 02:08 PM (5J0gB)

22 Eventually it will just fall right out. Maybe in your lifetime, maybe not.

Posted by: fd at March 24, 2024 02:09 PM (vFG9F)

23 Umm ... shouldn't that be 'vise' ... ?
Posted by: Dr_No at March 24, 2024 02:02 PM (ayRl+)

It could be either one, vices are hard to shift and have sharp teeth.

the solution of course is to build and EDM machine and spark that tool out

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 02:10 PM (D7oie)

24 I guess you could say that about most anything.

Posted by: fd at March 24, 2024 02:10 PM (vFG9F)

25 11 My impact screwgun gets jambed and often need to bang the tip left and right to get it to come out
Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:04 PM (fwDg9)

That should do it.

Posted by: Dino58 at March 24, 2024 02:13 PM (LVPff)

26 Maybe take it to a gunsmith repair shop and see what they'd charge to fix it.

Posted by: redridinghood at March 24, 2024 02:15 PM (NpAcC)

27 Dip in ice water for a few minutes?

Heat gently with a torch?

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 02:15 PM (QB+5g)

28 They do have a tendency to not come out when you want it and won't stay in when you do

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:16 PM (fwDg9)

29 Usually drop a little oil in the holder then keep using it a few times in each direction.

Posted by: Rex B at March 24, 2024 02:17 PM (5h/8D)

30 BIGGER HAMMER.

Posted by: zooomzooom at March 24, 2024 02:18 PM (rfnUk)

31 Sometimes the collet on my Dremel misbehaves in the same way. Takes patience. And ya gotta hold your mouth right.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at March 24, 2024 02:18 PM (dg+HA)

32 One word:
Oxy-acetylene torch.

Posted by: Weasel at March 24, 2024 02:18 PM (JwHpX)

33 Give it to some chick and ask her to get it out.

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 02:19 PM (QB+5g)

34 Ok so we solved that problem now what?

Posted by: fd at March 24, 2024 02:20 PM (vFG9F)

35 Just read an article on how to fix that problem but cannot remember where or what. I think it was on a jammed Dremel chuck.

Posted by: Braenyard at March 24, 2024 02:20 PM (O3WQj)

36 Well, CBD, if you are going to move, make sure you get a good realtor. I think this one's probably available: "Real Estate Agent Accidentally Burned Down $2 Million Property ahead of Open House by 'Tidying Up'".

https://tinyurl.com/35c2a548

Posted by: Paco at March 24, 2024 02:22 PM (njExo)

37 There is the thought already brought up go buy a new drill/ screwgun made in this century.

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:22 PM (fwDg9)

38 One word: Heat

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 24, 2024 02:23 PM (XeU6L)

39 Sweet.

Cooler than an easy-out.

Posted by: Redenzo at March 24, 2024 02:24 PM (V/pbu)

40 First impact tool I ever owned, a 14V Dewalt, I put a socket driver into it, the kind with a straight hex shank, not the one with the around-notch for the ball detent.

The fucking thing was wedge tight and could not be removed, once I put the tool to work and torqued the bit.

Took it back to the lumberyard where I bought it and they somehow got the bit out.

Never did that again. Those tools are meant for that specific hex shank, with the detent notch. No notch, no go.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at March 24, 2024 02:26 PM (KiBMU)

41 Have you tried shaking your fist at it, and calling it vulgar names? I suggest 'Whoremonger'.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 24, 2024 02:26 PM (XeU6L)

42 Gotta heat that thing up...get it real hot and it will slip right off there.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at March 24, 2024 02:26 PM (R/m4+)

43 Enter the search term "stuck chuck" but keep it on 'safe search'.

Posted by: Braenyard at March 24, 2024 02:27 PM (O3WQj)

44 bang the tip left and right

Used to date her.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in solidarity with the Struggle to maintain Moron standards at March 24, 2024 02:28 PM (c/7nx)

45 11 My impact screwgun gets jambed and often need to bang the tip left and right to get it to come out
Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:04 PM (fwDg9)

-------

Was expecting a Paolo sock on that comment

Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at March 24, 2024 02:29 PM (kOluj)

46 I hate those and always use regular cordless drills with keyless chucks.

I was just looking at this LRN2DIY guy yesterday. He's OK.

https://youtu.be/43cuU0lP6To?si=mxF6ux32pzN4rIYs

Posted by: Scottst at March 24, 2024 02:29 PM (W3yCW)

47
Send it back to the factory and tell them to get the damn thing out.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at March 24, 2024 02:33 PM (lCaJd)

48 1)Place base in ViSe. 2)Grab the shaft with a substantial pair of pliers. 3) SQUEEZE! 4) Smack the pliers near the gripped shaft with a hammer in the direction needed for removal.

You will end up gouging your pretty chrome plating but it will remind you not to do that again.

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 02:33 PM (QB+5g)

49 Removed a 2 5/16in hitch ball yesterday from our antisway hitch. It is torqued at 350 ft/lbs. Used a 1/2in breaker bar with a cheater pipe. It almost bent the pipe but finally broke loose. Impact gun didn't budge it.

Posted by: Maj. Healey at March 24, 2024 02:34 PM (eYF7X)

50 You gotta hot wrench that shit!

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 02:35 PM (cOq4q)

51 sous vide it

Posted by: Ronster at March 24, 2024 02:36 PM (X/vd3)

52 Put it in the freezer. Maybe it will contract enough to come free.

Or put the driver in the vise, wrap an extension cord around the bit and let the electro magnet give it a go. Make sure there is a sturdy catcher for the bit.

Posted by: PaleRider at March 24, 2024 02:36 PM (wTs+0)

53
Yeah, I pretty much don't sit by the pool anymore

-- Marco Polo

Posted by: Divide by Zero at March 24, 2024 02:38 PM (RKVpM)

54 Do they still make Liquid Wrench?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at March 24, 2024 02:39 PM (IG4Id)

55
Penetrating oil. Tap repeatedly. I've had the same problem before.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at March 24, 2024 02:39 PM (RKVpM)

56 I'd clamp some visegrips right on that hexagonal part where it meets the cylindrical section and then hammer on the jaws of the visegrip to create an impact load on that whatsit to get it free

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 02:41 PM (oCjPU)

57 >>> Enter the search term "stuck chuck" but keep it on 'safe search'.
Posted by: Braenyard

But you won't get the best results then.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 02:41 PM (cOq4q)

58 41 Have you tried shaking your fist at it, and calling it vulgar names? I suggest 'Whoremonger'.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 24, 2024 02:26 PM (XeU6L)

'Son of a BITCH!'

Posted by: Aetius451AD at March 24, 2024 02:41 PM (di6C2)

59 >Do they still make Liquid Wrench?

Posted by: weft cut-loop

yes
I used that to get a stuck ball hitch out of the F150's receiver-
well, that and a BFH

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 02:42 PM (oCjPU)

60 BFH solves a lot of problems, in my experience

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 02:43 PM (oCjPU)

61 The key lesson here is not to use impact drivers for anything

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 02:43 PM (BL/sn)

62 Did you try turning it off and on again?
Have you rebooted it?
That's not supposed to happen.

P.S. That is all I get from IT at work. Sure it will be as helpful here.

Posted by: jimmymcnulty at March 24, 2024 02:44 PM (WQsZB)

63 https://youtu.be/LsbRrTULpgA

We're All Far Right Now

Posted by: You Really Don't Want to Know at March 24, 2024 02:45 PM (+xYe0)

64 I had a bit holder get stuck in a cordless drill once.

I put it in the freezer (sans battery) overnight and it popped right out. Needed a bit of tapping with a hammer, but it did pop out.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at March 24, 2024 02:45 PM (Q4IgG)

65 just beat the ever-loving shit out of it

something's bound to give

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 02:45 PM (oCjPU)

66 Gotta use that Gorilla Grip, dawg.

Posted by: Sweetdick at March 24, 2024 02:48 PM (0FoWg)

67 Little tiny noose and the long drop method should pop it right off.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 02:48 PM (cOq4q)

68 FWP fixed. Replaced 2 hinges on kitchen cabinet. So much to know. Cabinet type, door type, overlay, screw hole spacing, opening angle, soft close Y or N. Sheesh.

Lowes didn't have 'em so had to go to Menard's (spit.)

Posted by: olddog in mo at March 24, 2024 02:49 PM (ju2Fy)

69 I find that tapping the end of the bit will usually loosen the chchuck on mine

Posted by: qixlqatl at March 24, 2024 02:49 PM (hK8zl)

70 I had a FWP when I was camping in a rented camper.
The tool to lower and raise the stabilizers (all four corners of the camper) barely fit in my cordless drill and couldn't be tightened. The existing chuck is 3/8
Anyone know how to identify a larger drill chuck on an battery operated drill?
I'm going to need one.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at March 24, 2024 02:50 PM (EcFOi)

71 PIT 2 COL 0 end 1st

gotta wait til the 3rd when the Pens will be gasping for air a mile above sea level

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 02:50 PM (oCjPU)

72 This happens to my millwrights all the time.

Get your smallest hammer and tap it in the direction of the impact driver like you are driving a nail. Don't hit it hard.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at March 24, 2024 02:51 PM (5jPmg)

73 half of a cheater pipe story:
down in the basement I've got an 18" Ridgid pipe wrench with about a 10 or 15 degree bend in the handle about 6 inches from the end ... often wondered how long the piece of pipe was that got used on it.
I picked it out of a trash barrel in a laboratory; when I asked, no one would admit to knowing anything about it, LOL, standard research lab behavior.
still works fine, though. they make a darn good tool.

Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying to us for decades at March 24, 2024 02:55 PM (PFYt9)

74 Try cleaning it with a little PB Blaster or WD-40. The little detent ball in the quick coupler is jammed with something.

Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 02:58 PM (B705c)

75 Had to do an easy search to find the answer.
Just buy a 1/2 drill. duh.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at March 24, 2024 03:01 PM (EcFOi)

76 I would be surprised if a battery powered drill can turn the lugs on a trailer leveler.

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 03:01 PM (QB+5g)

77 FWP.
Mrs. Red jammed the snowblower and broke the shear pin on one side. And then she stopped shoveling the 14” of snow we got. What’s with that?

Oh, yeah. I have the/a flu.

Posted by: RI Red at March 24, 2024 03:03 PM (Kiwh3)

78 73 half of a cheater pipe story:
down in the basement I've got an 18" Ridgid pipe wrench with about a 10 or 15 degree bend in the handle about 6 inches from the end ... often wondered how long the piece of pipe was that got used on it.
I picked it out of a trash barrel in a laboratory; when I asked, no one would admit to knowing anything about it, LOL, standard research lab behavior.
still works fine, though. they make a darn good tool.

Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying to us for decades at March 24, 2024 02:55 PM (PFYt9)

We pour those handles in the foundry I work at. We do some Snap On too. Buy Rigid.
You would be amazed how many we make. I can't believe they sell that many wrenches a year.

Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:04 PM (B705c)

79 To avoid the vise teeth marks on the bit holder - and to increase holding power - wrap the bit holder in tape (electrician's tape, Gorilla tape, something) first.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:07 PM (eqpxU)

80 >>> 57 >>> Enter the search term "stuck chuck" but keep it on 'safe search'.
Posted by: Braenyard

But you won't get the best results then.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 02:41 PM (cOq4q)

The Paolo does not have this problem.

Posted by: Paolo at March 24, 2024 03:07 PM (llON8)

81 If I have a 21hp Briggs motor in a Craftsman mower that burns oil real bad, AND a 19hp Briggs/Craftsman that no longer turns it's camshaft, DO I have enough compatible parts to make one?

Posted by: These fish sticks...on my mobile at Coronado Camp at March 24, 2024 03:10 PM (K9I/T)

82 Avs have a FWP 😕

the Pittsburgh Penguins

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 03:10 PM (oCjPU)

83 The freezer idea is a good one.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - If this is how Georgia hires attorneys, imagine how they manage elections at March 24, 2024 03:12 PM (Cgfkv)

84 70 I had a FWP when I was camping in a rented camper.
The tool to lower and raise the stabilizers (all four corners of the camper) barely fit in my cordless drill and couldn't be tightened. The existing chuck is 3/8
Anyone know how to identify a larger drill chuck on an battery operated drill?
I'm going to need one.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron a

I use a 3/8in cordless drill with a socket adapter for our stab jacks. I think it's a 3/4" socket. Don't go too fast when the jack reaches near the ground. Don't want to bend the jacks. Just touching the ground.

Posted by: Maj. Healey at March 24, 2024 03:13 PM (eYF7X)

85 Spray some Blaster in it. Tap to get it to penetrate, repeat.

THEN sell the house and move.

Posted by: Summa cum lardo at March 24, 2024 03:15 PM (wM304)

86 My FWP is my lawn mower battery ran out of juice with a tiny square of the back yard left to do.

I took that as a sign that I needed to sit on the patio swing for awhile, admiring my handiwork. Not too shabby for my first mowing job in 20 years and a sloped yard.

Posted by: screaming in digital at March 24, 2024 03:15 PM (1eY81)

87 Buy a set of rings for the oil burner that works.

Posted by: Braenyard at March 24, 2024 03:16 PM (O3WQj)

88 Be thankful you have stabilizers. When the Little Rascals went camping in a horse-drawn camping wagon, it would go up on two wheels whenever Chubby moved fore or aft. Had to keep him in the middle.

Posted by: Wheezer and Farina at March 24, 2024 03:17 PM (V5BDR)

89 1)Place base in ViSe. 2)Grab the shaft with a substantial pair of pliers. 3) SQUEEZE! 4) Smack the pliers near the gripped shaft with a hammer in the direction needed for removal.
Posted by: pawn

Effective both for getting a bit holder out of a drill, and getting information out of a terrorist.

Posted by: mikeski at March 24, 2024 03:19 PM (DgGvY)

90 Chuck problem: Break Free or Carb Cleaner with the red extension tube, place the tube flush with the slot and spray. That will ease the way and hopefully break the vacuum.

Posted by: Braenyard at March 24, 2024 03:19 PM (O3WQj)

91 I had one heck of a time removing the bolt assembly screw in the bolt of my Savage Axis-II rifle a couple years ago. I wanted to replace the bolt handle and install a 'bolt lift' kit. That kit is a ball bearing kit that significantly reduces the bolt component internal friction when opening the bolt. Much less torque needed to open the bolt - works as advertised.

I was following a utube vid that said to not use a power tool - just keep at it with the longest handle hex key you have. Worked in the end, but yow what a pain to accomplish.

Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:20 PM (5fDan)

92 86 My FWP is my lawn mower battery ran out of juice with a tiny square of the back yard left to do.

I took that as a sign that I needed to sit on the patio swing for awhile, admiring my handiwork. Not too shabby for my first mowing job in 20 years and a sloped yard.

Posted by: screaming in digital
-------------------------------

Do you have a dead man switch?
Does your mower have a generator?
It's been a long time since they sold riders without a generator.

Posted by: Braenyard at March 24, 2024 03:22 PM (O3WQj)

93 Screaming in Digital. Is this a tiny lawn and a cordless electric mower?

Posted by: PaleRider at March 24, 2024 03:23 PM (wTs+0)

94 Avalanche getting its ass kicked 4-0 2nd

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 03:24 PM (oCjPU)

95 You would be amazed how many we make. I can't believe they sell that many wrenches a year.
Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:04 PM (B705c)

Three reasons: the guys who sell tools go from shop to shop in their big square trucks and offer upgrades for credit,
a lot of shop mechanics like to roll their tools over to new ones when they get the old ones mostly paid off,
a lot of shop mechanics also think they are hammers.

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:25 PM (D7oie)

96 😧😬😟

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (oCjPU)

97 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.

Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?

https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5

Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)

98 Braenyard it is an electric self propelled mower with rechargeable battery. I knew when I bought it that I wouldn't be able to do the whole yard on 1 charge. That's fine with me because I would rather not do the whole thing at once anyway since I'm not 29. I've got a half acre, so not too yuge, but it's sloped pretty much all over.

Posted by: screaming in digital at March 24, 2024 03:29 PM (1eY81)

99 I bought the socket I use to run the levelers in my slide-on at an RV place. I actually bought two. You know why.

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 03:29 PM (QB+5g)

100 So far, at least twenty times for twenty different FWP problems, the helpful commentariat has advised moving as a permanent solution to the problem. Is it just that you won't pay the realtor xim/xer"s just due of 6%, or stubbornness in general?

Posted by: Trying To Help at March 24, 2024 03:29 PM (V5BDR)

101 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)

Jesus wept, that is Wayland Flowers' puppet Madam and Judy from the old Punch and Judy shows

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:29 PM (D7oie)

102 Cordless drills and tools are 100% disposable. I go through probably 20, 3/8 20 volt Dewalts (not by choice) a year at work and countless batteries. Isn't one out there worth the time to fix and they all break. Therefore the best path is the cheapest available.
Bauer from Harbor Freight. They're all made in China anyway.
For the jack issue I would go with the 3/8 impact driver. Slower than a drill and way more torque. Plus a thousand other uses. You'll never use a ratchet again.

Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:30 PM (B705c)

103 PaleRider, yes a cordless electric and half acre yard.

Posted by: screaming in digital at March 24, 2024 03:31 PM (1eY81)

104 I needed a 3" pipe wrench. Rigid's was 80$ so I got the Amazon brand 3" offset pipe wrench. Next tool up is the Ryobi 18v PEX pinch clamp.

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:31 PM (IG7T0)

105 I bought the socket I use to run the levelers in my slide-on at an RV place. I actually bought two. You know why.
Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 03:29 PM (QB+5g)

My suggestion is that you also buy a roll of duct tape as well, so you can duct tape the spare onto the back wall of the cab of your truck, or the back of one of the closets. .

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:32 PM (D7oie)

106 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)
_______________

She's pointing to a child she frightened, and asking the other gal to go comfort the child crying in terror.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:33 PM (eqpxU)

107 Hi....... I am from the government and I am here to help you with your problem .......

Posted by: AOC at March 24, 2024 03:33 PM (BSF0H)

108 I was wrong it is actually Punch and Judy. Any moment the cricket bat is coming out . . .

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:33 PM (D7oie)

109 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)
_________________

AOC from the future?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:34 PM (eqpxU)

110 I use my Ryobi 3/8" drill to back out the steel buck hinge machine screws. If they really bap bap bap bap them in, I start the drill until the screw maxes out its torque, then, I use the drill itself as a screwdriver. Never fails

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:34 PM (IG7T0)

111 Kamalolol?

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:36 PM (IG7T0)

112 111 Kamalolol?

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:36 PM (IG7T0)

Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner!

Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:36 PM (5fDan)

113 The bit holder won't come out! That collar slides up and down just fine...locking and unlocking the holder, but it is jammed so tight that I cannot remove it. Those streaks on the bit holder are from the teeth of my vice!

Try Superzilla....... This stuff is amazing.......

Posted by: Ferd Berfall at March 24, 2024 03:37 PM (hbjSA)

114 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)
________________

She's pointing to where the dogs ran after she scared them off the back of the meat truck.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:37 PM (eqpxU)

115 Damn. Evil and drink does things to a face

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:37 PM (IG7T0)

116 I bought a battery push mower a couple years ago. As fate would have it, Lowes quit selling that particular model and went to a lower voltage, lower amperage version.

Replacement batteries are about as much as the mower was new; $180

I'll be selling it and sticking with the Toro gas push mower.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (Q4IgG)

117 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)
________________

"This way to the border, senora."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (eqpxU)

118 Anyone else have trouble removing old bathroom faucets?

Posted by: Oglebay at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (ogTiX)

119 Looks like Kamalolol had a Pelosi done to her face

Posted by: Jamaica at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (IG7T0)

120 Replacement batteries are about as much as the mower was new; $180

I'll be selling it and sticking with the Toro gas push mower.
Posted by: Martini Farmer at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (Q4IgG)
_______________

Now do EVs.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:38 PM (eqpxU)

121 I was wrong it is actually Punch and Judy. Any moment the cricket bat is coming out . . .
Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:33 PM (D7oie)

It's only funny until someone gets hurt...and then it's hilarious.

Posted by: Punch and Judy at March 24, 2024 03:39 PM (wM304)

122 When all these EV's die in 10 years what do you do with them ?? No retail value or trade in/up value..... Just Junk !!!!

No thanx, I will stick to my Gasoline powered car......

Posted by: Ferd Berfall at March 24, 2024 03:40 PM (hbjSA)

123 Cut your losses and take this driver motor to the pawn shop.

Go to the local tool shed and pay for a new, brand-name driver that's less than 30 years old.

The first world tool guys make this thing called an impact driver that will spare of your anxiety and grief.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at March 24, 2024 03:41 PM (WtvCN)

124 When is Joey Shit-Pants going to trade in his Vette for a EV ????

Posted by: Ferd Berfall at March 24, 2024 03:41 PM (hbjSA)

125 Ms One Heart Beat Away in Puerto Rico yesterday or today, being totally clueless as well as looking a bit worn down

https://tinyurl.com/n395kfas

Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:43 PM (5fDan)

126 A major FWP for politicians: Your last round of plastic surgery ain't cutting it (pun intended) after several years in the field.
Photo taken today. Can you guess who it is?
https://tinyurl.com/4jttcxe5
Posted by: Gref at March 24, 2024 03:26 PM (5fDan)

Wishmaster 5: Kameltoe's Jive Talkin Boogaloo...

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at March 24, 2024 03:44 PM (R/m4+)

127 When all these EV's die in 10 years what do you do with them ?? No retail value or trade in/up value..... Just Junk !!!!
_______________

A liberal acquaintance proudly told me he'd just bought an EV. I gave him a Mona Lisa-esque smile, and nodded, while I thought, "You poor dumb bastard. You bought in at the top. That thing will be sold for scrap in a few years, and end up as a series of beer cans."

He failed to grasp - well, a lot of things - that the big surge in EVs will result in a few years in a big glut of knackered EVs that will have zero resale value. The Chinks apparently have whole fields full of dead EVs that no one wants, so they just sit there rusting.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:44 PM (eqpxU)

128 >>> Replacement batteries are about as much as the mower was new; $180
I'll be selling it and sticking with the Toro gas push mower.
Posted by: Martini Farmer

Ryobi 40V tools are the same, tool alone about $150, battery alone $100+ for the smallest.
I bought three complete with battery and charger when they introduced the product line and you could get the complete package for about $10 more than tool alone.

Chainsaw on a stick, leaf blower, and weedwacker. Always two batteries for backup.

Just got hedgetrimmer on a stick today, $150 tool and stick only.
Found that the pole and battery holder/trigger are exact same as the chainsaw on a stick.
Now I have an extra long stick to menace higher limbs.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:44 PM (cOq4q)

129
Since Pixy is allowing flags now, I think this sums everything up:

🇺🇸: ISIS is about to attack you
🇷🇺: LIARS!!
ISIS: We attacked you
🇷🇺: This must’ve been 🇺🇦
🇺🇦: It wasn’t us
ISIS: It was us
🇷🇺: Here is van with 🇺🇦 plates!
Everyone: They’re from 🇧🇾
ISIS: It was us
🇷🇺: We arrested guys from 🇹🇯
🇹🇯: No you didn’t
ISIS: It was us
🇷🇺: It was 🇺🇸&🇺🇦…

Posted by: Divide by Zero at March 24, 2024 03:46 PM (RKVpM)

130 >>> When all these EV's die in 10 years what do you do with them ?? No retail value or trade in/up value..... Just Junk !!!!
No thanx, I will stick to my Gasoline powered car......
Posted by: Ferd Berfall

ICE conversion kits!
Oh, that won't work because they lack the capability to convert at any cost unless you want to put a Tesla body on a jacked up F250 4x4,

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:47 PM (cOq4q)

131 ... jacked up F250 4x4 FRAME.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:47 PM (cOq4q)

132 I use a 3/8in cordless drill with a socket adapter for our stab jacks. I think it's a 3/4" socket. Don't go too fast when the jack reaches near the ground. Don't want to bend the jacks. Just touching the ground.
Posted by: Maj. Healey

This doesn't use a standard socket, it has raised slots 180 out from each other.
I wish it used any size standard socket.
Good advice on just touching the ground. I did that without being told, it just made sense.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at March 24, 2024 03:47 PM (EcFOi)

133 Just learned that the pics the cameras take when you go through license-plate toll plazas, and the cameras used for speed traps and red light runs, they get somewhat foiled if you have spraypainted your plate with clear reflective paint.

Don't try this at home.

They make spray paint labeled exactly for this purpose.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at March 24, 2024 03:48 PM (KiBMU)

134 When all these EV's die in 10 years what do you do with them ?? No retail value or trade in/up value..... Just Junk !!!!
_________________

"Get yer tulip bulbs here! Get 'em while they're still valuable!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:48 PM (eqpxU)

135 The next Cash for Clunkers will be MANDATORY, comrade.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 24, 2024 03:49 PM (63Dwl)

136 IAB. Ah, my FWP is that I seem to have a knack for slipping the chains on both the 8" pole saw and the 14" corded electric chain saw. As a 29 year old ette I don't mind an excuse to quit fairly soon, but lately they've been popping chains off stupidly fast.

Posted by: PaleRider at March 24, 2024 03:49 PM (wTs+0)

137 When everybody in the world turns on their lithium batteries at the same time, we will create a singularity that will trigger an earth-shattering transformation and our world will collapse into a black hole.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at March 24, 2024 03:50 PM (WtvCN)

138 ICE conversion kits!
Oh, that won't work because they lack the capability to convert at any cost unless you want to put a Tesla body on a jacked up F250 4x4,
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:47 PM (cOq4q)
_________________

Or you could just buy an ICE vehicle in the first place, and save yourself a lot of trouble and money.

Things like make think of the vegans gushing about how "meat substitutes" made from meadow muffins "taste just like meat!"

You know what tastes exactly meat? MEAT!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:51 PM (eqpxU)

139 The next Cash for Clunkers will be MANDATORY, comrade.
________________

And by Clunkers you mean Democrat politicians, I take it?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:52 PM (eqpxU)

140 I have a buddy that works at Tesla. He will nothing of my rants against battery power. He's making too much money to hear me poo-poo it.
Which, I point out is actually a part of the problem.

Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:53 PM (B705c)

141 my FWP is I have half n' half, heavy cream, and sweet condensed milk, and sometimes I have to think for a sec which one I want in my coffee

I also have 4 kinds of coffee, 2 drip and 2 espresso

decisions decisions

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 03:53 PM (oCjPU)

142 I have a buddy that works at Tesla. He will nothing of my rants against battery power. He's making too much money to hear me poo-poo it.
Which, I point out is actually a part of the problem.
Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:53 PM (B705c)
________________

"Get yer tulip bulbs here! Hurry! Everybody is buying them!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:55 PM (eqpxU)

143 PaleRider, are you tensioning the chains right? Usually when I have a chain slip off the bar it is because it is too slack. Sometimes it is because the bar tensioner is not secure or because the flange nuts holding the sideplate and the bar tight are not tight enough

The newer tensioning system is that dial on the side that you loosen up and then dial for tension, and then you tighten it down again, and that needs to be tightened and maybe inspected for sawdust in between the components. My deWalt seems to have done that once too.

Your chain might be stretching or you may have it too loose when it is cold when you start. Also check your bar to make sure the guide is not worn or bent.

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:55 PM (D7oie)

144 Kedrin Simms Brachman said that she was cleaning out her late father's tool room at his Quebec home when she opened his toolbox and found a grenade loose inside.
. . . .
When the Army officers arrived, they told Brachman,
"We normally get calls for these antique things and they aren't live."
But this one was live and had the detonator fully intact.

-
I always say, it's better to have a grenade and not need it than to need a grenade and not have it.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at March 24, 2024 03:56 PM (FVME7)

145 >>> IAB. Ah, my FWP is that I seem to have a knack for slipping the chains on both the 8" pole saw and the 14" corded electric chain saw. As a 29 year old ette I don't mind an excuse to quit fairly soon, but lately they've been popping chains off stupidly fast.
Posted by: PaleRider

If you can get the chain adjusted tight enough I'd blame the branch for pulling the chain off. After that the drive sprocket.
If chain doesn't get tight I'd get a new chain (always have a new spare or two), Maybe new bar and chain.

Which reminds me, I need to get a spare bar too.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:56 PM (cOq4q)

146 No one needs more than one type of coffee, and I'm introducing a bill to make almond milk universal and mandatory.

Posted by: Bernie D-VT at March 24, 2024 03:57 PM (V5BDR)

147 I always say, it's better to have a grenade and not need it than to need a grenade and not have it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at March 24, 2024 03:56 PM (FVME7)

this. I suspect also that this is the attitude that my CPA Grandfather had for keeping a pistol in his desk all those years

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:57 PM (D7oie)

148 What is the number of the counting for a Canadian grenade?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 24, 2024 03:57 PM (63Dwl)

149 I should go into turbo drive to clean up this place. Heard yesterday at a potluck that the Colorado Ds passed their 'assault weapons' ban in the house and it is even more likely to pass in the CO senate and of course Polis will sign it. And I did not know this but they adopted California emissions. If some meth head or other thug steals your catalytic converter they cost almost double. One guy told a buddy to buy one in WY and put it on for him. That probably won't pass muster if you have a new model car, but at least you wouldn't be paying failifornia prices if your car is older than whenever they passed this law.

Posted by: PaleRider at March 24, 2024 03:57 PM (wTs+0)

150 Only few minutes left but heard a story about Cash for Clunkers I never heard before from a mechanic at a garage was working at few weeks ago.
Any car traded in had to be destroyed by law so they drained oil and would let them run until dead. Only sometimes it was hours, so eventually a fluid was poured in to oil that hasn't the demise.

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 03:58 PM (fwDg9)

151 At some point in my youth the flat fixing service stations and tire stores started using pneumatic wrenches to remove and return lug nuts. Prior to that they used a tire tool like everybody else and how tight they got the lug nut depended on the strength of the tire fixing fellow. But with the air wrench they tightened the nuts until the wrench stopped turning and then hit it another lick just for the hell of it. I never knew my dad had such a large vocabulary of curse words until I watched him try to get a tire off with a 4way wrench that had been over tightened. It was impressive.

Posted by: Pendejo at March 24, 2024 03:58 PM (rVhSN)

152 "Get yer tulip bulbs here! Hurry! Everybody is buying them!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at March 24, 2024 03:55 PM (eqpxU)

I have thousands in my yard and have used it as my counter investment argument to him a few times.

'I'm invested in Tulips. They're coming back any day now."

Posted by: Reforger at March 24, 2024 03:58 PM (B705c)

153 >>> Your chain might be stretching or you may have it too loose when it is cold when you start. Also check your bar to make sure the guide is not worn or bent.
Posted by: Kindltot

Too slow I am...

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:58 PM (cOq4q)

154 bookkeeper stories: Daniel Pinkwater claimed his dad, a bookkeeper for shady sorts, kept two blackjacks in his desk.
He claimed that when he asked his father why, he was told, "Brown one for the blue suit, the black one goes with the grey suit"

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 03:59 PM (D7oie)

155 Avs have closed to 4-3 early 3rd

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 03:59 PM (oCjPU)

156 Get cleaned up and upstairs
FOODIE NOODIE

Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 04:01 PM (fwDg9)

157 Which reminds me, I need to get a spare bar too.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 03:56 PM (cOq4q)

I have a Poulan that will not cut straight, no matter what I do the saw scoops to the right. Do you think it is the bar?

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 04:01 PM (D7oie)

158 I want some follow up and the topic stuck thing tonight

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 04:01 PM (oCjPU)

159 FIGHT

Posted by: Don Black at March 24, 2024 04:02 PM (oCjPU)

160
Talking about chain saws I saw someone mention that hardware stores usually can do the resharpening job. I dropped off four at my local hardware store and the next day they were ready. About 1/3rd the cost of new.

Not sure of quality yet... but cheaper then new.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at March 24, 2024 04:02 PM (RKVpM)

161 i came in from the garage pissed off because I'm doing th rear axle seals on my daughter's 4 runner. A task at which I am a noob.

I got one side right but the second side I thought I had not pressed the retainer on far enough, so pressed it some more, and now it's too far, and I have to pull it off and try again.

Posted by: TexasDan at March 24, 2024 04:03 PM (rAsBA)

162 Exact size wrench, not a Crescent, and a pipe/strap wrench on the chuck.
I just a few days ago went through all my screw guides, the ones with the steel C-rings, and ruined one. The C-guides get cattywampous in the shaft and they stick.

Your problem is not actually a FWP, a pipe wrench or strap wrench. It's a torque issue.

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:04 PM (9yXr+)

163 What is the number of the counting for a Canadian grenade?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr.

Five.

One, eh? Two, eh? Thr*BOOM*

Posted by: mikeski at March 24, 2024 04:04 PM (DgGvY)

164 I have a Poulan that will not cut straight, no matter what I do the saw scoops to the right. Do you think it is the bar?
Posted by: Kindltot'

Yes. If the bar is tweaked it will not cut.

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:04 PM (9yXr+)

165 Not sure of quality yet... but cheaper then new.
Posted by: Divide by Zero at March 24, 2024 04:02 PM (RKVpM)

You can do it yourself if you are willing to take the time. Shops have the jigs and such, but if you are willing to do a clean up, you can do it by hand unless it is really dull.

I mean, loggers used to do it all the time, and sometimes it turned out like "using the socket wrench for a hammer" level of success.
I heard a couple of stories that had, "and then I took some time to sharpen the saw chain, and thought about what I was going to do next . . . " in it.

Posted by: Kindltot at March 24, 2024 04:05 PM (D7oie)

166 Jacked up F-250 chassis

Posted by: Braenard at March 24, 2024 04:06 PM (Snklc)

167 Both saws have the screw to adjust tension. I may need to tighten the chain saw one, just replaced that chain. The pole saw chain is probably old. I probably am often twisting the saw during the cuts w/o realizing it. Especially the pole saw. Even with no extensions on it, the weight of the motor makes it heavy for me to handle, especially if I'm cutting anything overhead.

Posted by: PaleRider at March 24, 2024 04:06 PM (wTs+0)

168 Oh, that won't work because they lack the capability to convert at any cost unless you want to put a Tesla body on a jacked up F250 4x4,
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher

... jacked up F250 4x4 FRAME.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher

Putting it on the entire truck could work, too. Like a double-decker bus thing. Or maybe use part of it as a truck-bed topper.

Posted by: mikeski at March 24, 2024 04:07 PM (DgGvY)

169 I have a Poulan that will not cut straight, no matter what I do the saw scoops to the right. Do you think it is the bar?
Posted by: Kindltot

Maybe uneven wear on the bar tracks that the chain glides on.
Take the bar off and inspect under good light. Should be perfectly flat and sharp edges where the chain glides (no mushrooming or peens).
I would guess yours has a twist.

I had one that was bad enough that I put it aside after getting a new one in case I need to root out a stump w/o feeling guilty about ruining a chain and bar.

Side Note - Growing up in great white north we burned wood for heat in the winter and from 12+ I had to cut.and split rediculous amounts of wood.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at March 24, 2024 04:08 PM (cOq4q)

170 I have a Poulan that will not cut straight, no matter what I do the saw scoops to the right. Do you think it is the bar?
Posted by: Kindltot'

Yes. If the bar is tweaked it will not cut.
Posted by: LenNeal'

I should have specified the nature of what would cause a chain to not cut true:
If the bar is
Kinked
Warped
Bowed
Cupped

The chain will not run true (straight) inside the groove of the bar and it will bounce all over the place under rotational load. I would not use this saw as I think it would be a matter of time until the chain breaks and you might catch it a loose end in the face.
Test the bar with a rule. If it's really bad you can hold it up to the Sun and see it.

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:10 PM (9yXr+)

171 Or ask AOP, as he is much more knowledgeable than me and doesn't drink nearly as much as me and is much more polite.

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:13 PM (9yXr+)

172 At some point in my youth the flat fixing service stations and tire stores started using pneumatic wrenches to remove and return lug nuts. It was impressive.
Posted by: Pendejo'

I had a tire changed at a local shop and tested the lugs inspecting the brakes. I drove back and told them I couldn't get the lugs off. The boss couldn't get them off.
220 Ft/lbs.

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:16 PM (9yXr+)

173
Umm ... shouldn't that be 'vise' ... ?
Posted by: Dr_No'

Yes, it is 'vise', an English pet peeve of mine...

Posted by: LenNeal at March 24, 2024 04:18 PM (9yXr+)

174 Burn the house down first. That way the bad luck will not be transmitted to the next owner. It will kill all the spiders and mice as well.

Posted by: Quartermaster at March 24, 2024 05:30 PM (J0tKB)

175 Cash for Clunkers is when I realized that Obama was an incredibly malicious prick and things were totally out of control.

Posted by: pawn at March 24, 2024 06:01 PM (QB+5g)

176 Lololoooooo

Posted by: Close The Fed at March 24, 2024 06:12 PM (LeNk3)

177 Use the vice on the shaft, not the round bit.
Also, pull outward before spinning in the vise.

Also, use gun lube on it, see if that doesn't help. (Like you should have on the screws. This will get brought up in the Gun Thread, I'm certain. *Ahem*)

Posted by: GWB at March 24, 2024 06:22 PM (69JzL)

178 I'm introducing a bill to make almond milk universal and mandatory.
Posted by: Bernie D-VT at March 24, 2024 03:57 PM (V5BDR)

Just so long as you require the producers to hand milk their tiny little teats, and not to just crush the whole almond to get at it.

Posted by: GWB at March 24, 2024 06:25 PM (69JzL)

179 If you are talking about the connection at the end of the bolt that hold the bolt handle on. As I recall I had to attach a wrench and stomp on it to break it loose the first time!

Posted by: Vic at March 24, 2024 06:44 PM (wyNJb)

180 Tap it with a hammer, I usually tap it on anything hard near what I’m working on.

Posted by: John at March 24, 2024 07:40 PM (FXsk8)

181 37 There is the thought already brought up go buy a new drill/ screwgun made in this century.
Posted by: Skip at March 24, 2024 02:22 PM (fwDg9)

LOL

Posted by: m at March 25, 2024 06:13 AM (o3SCB)

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