Ace of Spades Pet Thread

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Good afternoon, welcome to the almost world famous AoSHQ Pet Thread. Hope you like today's above the fold photo. Sometimes a honest photo hits the spot.

Sit back and enjoy the world of animals.

***

A Little of This. A Little of That.


Thinking about a puppy? Looking for that next dog?
Comical dog breed guide should help you out on your next endeavor.


Updated news on the tainted dog food with euthanasia drugs.


Sometimes the best intentions result in the worst outcome.


Looking out for feral cats.

Domains for cats.


A cute wedding.

***


Meet the PetMorons

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Hi Mis H!

I’m a lurker, but a regular reader, and particularly enjoy the pet, food, and gardening threads. This is Yasha and Bear, two standard American Eskimo dogs, brother and sister. They’re twelve now. Eskies were bred from German Spitz dogs (Pomeranians were also German Spitz, but bred down in size) and one breeder, around the 1900s, bred white ones for the circus. White dogs, white ponies, the origin of “dog and pony show”. After WWI, it was unpopular to be “German” anything, so the white line was named after that breeder’s kennel, and they became American Eskimos (and never set foot in Alaska!) They’re bright, love to do tricks, and shed hair like crazy.

Thank you for an enjoyable thread!

Joanie

Great looking dogs Joanie. And thanks for the history lesson. Know we know where that old saying came from.


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I'm a long time lurker and never poster. I just want to drop you a photo of one of our cats. She is 15 now and starting to suffer from health problems that may be terminal. It was sudden and I had promised myself sometime back that I would send a photo in while she was still with us. Here she is doing what she does best, sleeping on my lap. Love the pet thread. Love the website, my all time favorite hands down.

Thanks,
Nick

Nick, thanks for coming out of the lurker shadows and sharing your cat's photo with us. Hopefully her condition is improving.


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Daily Lurker Kathy here. This is our Beautiful Missy (bichon) and our puppy Frankie (yorkie-poodle). Our Missy was getting older, and with the Boy going off to college in the fall, thought we'd get her a companion. So Frankie came along by chance. Well Missy, at 12, was not very amused at his puppiness, but when we came home at the end of the day, she would be curled up next to his crate. We jokingly called Frankie the Insurance Dog, since Missy was getting on in years. Well, this picture was at Easter, and by September, Our Beautiful Missy was gone, thyroid cancer. Frankie is now 8, and we love him dearly, but he's like a dopey little boy compared to our Princess. While Missy loved my husband best, Frankie adores me most, which was very helpful to me in dealing with the empty nest. A home must be very lonely without a Dog to come home to.

Kathy, a lovely photo of the puppehs. Sorry you have lost Missy but happy to know you have her companion Frankie to keep company. A home without a dog is pretty damn quiet.


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My Archie, also known as The Dude in the Cheap Orange Coat, is a big believer in catch and release. He catches outside and releases, completely unharmed, inside. Mostly chipmunks. But once a bat. And this time of year he’s quite fond of finding water roaches. He likes the way they perk up and start running when he brings them in and they warm up a little. DeAnn

Quite the interesting cat you have there. A chipmunk in the house must be a challenge. Thanks for sending in Archie's photo.


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Been a lurker since ’06, always the highlights of my day. This is Daenerys (Targaryen) my new Golden Retriever at 8 weeks exploring her forever house.
The little girl is filling the pawprints left by my previous golden Marilyn (Monroe) who left us at age 3 from spindle-cell cancer. Little Dany follows daddy everywhere and is well on her way to being my second love. The love of a golden,I truly believe, is unmatched. All the best to the other pet morons out there. - Joe

Sorry to hear that you had to get this cute puppy by losing a young dog Joe. Loosing a pet sucks, especially a young one. Dany looks like she will give you a run for your money. Thank you for submitting her photo.


***


Koushka Lord of the Kindles.jpg


Our cat Koushka likes to claim new things around the house. So when my husband
re-flashed a bunch of demo Kindles into working Kindles for Christmas
presents, and set them in a stack to charge...Koushka decided they were the
new Pride Rock. Ever since then one of his nicknames has been Lord of the
Kindles. After all, no Christmas present is complete without cat hair.

- Safewrite

Hair on things? Wouldn't know anything about that. Thanks for the submission looks like Koushka has a difficult life there.


***


I recently made a video to guilt a friend of mine into allowing my magnificent, spoiled Basset "Barley Hound" into his house.

It worked-Jason


What kind of friend would need this video to allow that cutie into his house? You and Barley Hound are invited to stop by anytime you want. Thanks for sharing this video.

***


Another week, another wonderful group of pets. Thank you so much for sharing them with us here at The Pet Thread.

Do you have a photo or a YouTube video of your pet you would like to share? You can reach us at petmorons at gmail dot com.

Have a great week!!

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at 03:00 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Meow!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 02:54 PM (qJtVm)

2 ruff

Posted by: m at February 24, 2018 03:00 PM (VKsXm)

3 Hssssss!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 03:00 PM (qJtVm)

4 >>>Hope you like today's above the fold photo.

I LOVE today's above the fold photo.

Posted by: m at February 24, 2018 03:01 PM (VKsXm)

5 moo

Posted by: quint at February 24, 2018 03:01 PM (n13/j)

6 Pet Thread! What a great group this week!

WeaselDog is curled up beside me and says hi.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:03 PM (Sfs6o)

7 *arf*

*hic* *shart* *woof*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at February 24, 2018 03:05 PM (bJ0w+)

8 The Husky that's living here until June got a new tag today. After the name and contact info is the most appropriate statement, "I'm an escape artist."

Posted by: Blanco Basura - It's OK, I'm with the banned at February 24, 2018 03:06 PM (IcT7t)

9 Nick, give your kitty a pet for us. What a cutie!

Today's pets are a fine crop of moranimals.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 03:07 PM (qJtVm)

10 The Hungarian canine breed "Puli" is the original inspiration for dreadlocks.

Fact.

Posted by: Miklos Molnar, the Merry Magyar at February 24, 2018 03:07 PM (zCyNd)

11 A superlative group of adorable critters!
All of them are above average.

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 03:08 PM (w7KSn)

12 Aw, didn't post in time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8GJMhURnUI

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 03:08 PM (y87Qq)

13 The original recall on that contaminated dog food also included some brands of cat food.

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at February 24, 2018 03:08 PM (mpXpK)

14
Best of Breed for Handsome Dan and Best of Winners to his brother Big Val at today's San Jacinto KC show in LaPorte. Waiting for the Hound Group later.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 03:09 PM (JxaIz)

15 Koushka is awesome.

"You know what would look great draped over, well, anything? A cat. Guess what I happen to be? A cat. Lucky you."

p.s. Lurkeurs: de-lurk!

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 03:10 PM (y87Qq)

16 I guess I'm not a pyscho- or sociopath. I have enough empathy to have yawned seeing the yawning cat photo meme. (Or I am a sicko and it's just that I've only had 4 hours sleep.)

Posted by: andycanuck at February 24, 2018 03:11 PM (ewxPW)

17
The Hungarian canine breed "Puli" is the original inspiration for dreadlocks.

"Yo! What about us?" - Komondorok

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 03:12 PM (JxaIz)

18 Lurker Nick, we have 1 surviving cat Cinnamon who will be 17 soon, her sister passed away last year. She mostly wants a warm lap to rest on.

Posted by: Skip at February 24, 2018 03:13 PM (aC6Sd)

19 What a wonderful group of pets. The video is funny and touching and has that beautiful soundtrack. I had a basset many, many years ago, named Falstaff. Couldn't keep hin when I moved but found a loving home for him with a family that had just lost their basset to old age. Falstaff was probably the best canine clown in history.

Posted by: JTB at February 24, 2018 03:14 PM (V+03K)

20 LOVE the above the fold pic!

And well done, Ace of Spade lurkers...cute pets!

Posted by: Seems Legit at February 24, 2018 03:14 PM (U+nHb)

21 >>>Looking out for feral cats.

It's a trap!

Posted by: Adm. Ackbar at February 24, 2018 03:14 PM (/qEW2)

22 When Cinnamon leaves us I think my wife wants a dog, I always loved Husky breed.

Posted by: Skip at February 24, 2018 03:15 PM (aC6Sd)

23 How the heck do you gray box people make such nice pictures? Darnitall, I can't even get one of my kids (with mad skillz) to get decent pix.

Mine also will not, under any circumstances, wear costumes.

Neighbor was over last night and talked about my old cat (she was a mighty hunter) and how that really mean cat would allow her kids to dress her up and walk around with a doll stroller.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:16 PM (MIKMs)

24 >>>A cute wedding.

What's up with the men's weird lapel pins?

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 03:17 PM (/qEW2)

25 Weasel, Booger says Hello. Unfortunately, he will now be here until Monday.

Posted by: Ben Had at February 24, 2018 03:17 PM (QAjh1)

26 We've got the grandkids here for dinner and overnight, and with them, their 10-month-old Belgian sheepdog.

Imagine a totally black coyote, black eyes, and that's a Belgian. We lost ours to old age three years ago.

Posted by: Les Kinetic at February 24, 2018 03:18 PM (5OEn4)

27 >>>A cute wedding.

What's up with the men's weird lapel pins?
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 03:17 PM (/qEW2)


I think those are puppies? I'm not a dogologist though.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 03:19 PM (y87Qq)

28 Neighbor was over last night and talked about my old cat (she was a mighty hunter) and how that really mean cat would allow her kids to dress her up and walk around with a doll stroller.
Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:16 PM (MIKMs)
----
I would dress up our cat in baby clothes (even a bonnet!) and wheel her around in a buggy. Mama Cat would put up with it for a while and then say enough! and escape trailing bonnet and capelet.

I have never met another cat that would allow itself to be dressed up in little outfits.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 03:21 PM (qJtVm)

29 Son called and said I will have granddog until he leaves after Monday's funeral services. Neighborhood young man died suddenly (autopsy showed no drugs, thank goodness), so it looks like the old gang is together again.

I am still trying to write down the funny stories about the kid, but not having much luck. Too sad, I guess.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:21 PM (MIKMs)

30 The Hungarian canine breed "Puli" is the original inspiration for dreadlocks.

Fact.

Posted by: Miklos Molnar, the Merry Magyar at February 24, 2018 03:07 PM (zCyNd)


========

So in "Marley and Me" they should have cast a Puli?

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 03:24 PM (/qEW2)

31 Mine also will not, under any circumstances, wear costumes.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:16 PM (MIKMs)


The synagogue we used to go to had an annual Blessing of the Pets (a.k.a. Days of Awwww) but we only had one carrier. What to do with the second cat? One of my little sister's doll dresses. One cat, immobilized and humiliated.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 03:24 PM (y87Qq)

32 Great pets as usual.

Love the Pet Thread.

Posted by: JT at February 24, 2018 03:26 PM (B4vfZ)

33 Hssssss!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage



Is that your pet pit viper we're hearing from?

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 03:27 PM (fuK7c)

34 "Yo! What about us?" - Komondorok

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 03:12 PM (JxaIz)

Komondors are guard dogs, not the friendliest sort, very territorial.

They have inspired many burglars to find alternate employment.

Posted by: Miklos Molnar, the Merry Magyar at February 24, 2018 03:28 PM (zCyNd)

35 Who was it who had that big snake as a pet? Called (maybe) Daisy?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 03:28 PM (qJtVm)

36 The Hungarian canine breed "Puli" is the original inspiration for dreadlocks.


Hungarian doggie, dreadlock Puli
There was a Hungarian doggie
In the heart of America
Stolen from Mag-y-ar, brought to America

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 03:32 PM (fuK7c)

37 >>>Basset "Barley Hound" into his house.
It worked-Jason

Barley Hound looks at you adoringly.

Posted by: m at February 24, 2018 03:32 PM (VKsXm)

38 Doggehs are the only thing that makes me think God has some tiny piece of kindness somewhere and doesn't 100% hate the absolute shit out of humanity. Maybe just 99.98%.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 03:33 PM (NWiLs)

39 Hungarian doggie, dreadlock Puli
There was a Hungarian doggie
In the heart of America
Stolen from Mag-y-ar, brought to America

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 03:32 PM (fuK7c)

I ya ya
I ya ya
I ya ya
Now where's the palinka

Posted by: Miklos Molnar, the Merry Magyar at February 24, 2018 03:34 PM (zCyNd)

40 A fine flock of furry friends, as always!

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Penitent Cylon at February 24, 2018 03:34 PM (lLeln)

41
25 Weasel, Booger says Hello. Unfortunately, he will now be here until Monday.
Posted by: Ben Had at February 24, 2018 03:17 PM (QAjh1)
-------
I'm sure you'll help him find a good home through the shelter. Thanks, Ben Had!

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:35 PM (Sfs6o)

42 As a matter of fact, the only time in my many years that a dog bite was serious was a friend who stuck her arm between a Basset Hound and a Standard Poodle when they were arguing/fighting. The girl had lotsa stitches but no foul to the dogs because they were hers. Her parents said she should have known better.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:35 PM (MIKMs)

43 Well, I guess I'll go ahead and take one of the American Eskimo dogs. Make that two.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 03:35 PM (tcwn1)

44 The original recall on that contaminated dog food also included some brands of cat food.

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at February 24, 2018 03:08 PM (mpXpK)


I thought it also included Milkbones but was not specific as there is both a soft chewy version and a hard biscuit version with that brand name.

It was/is very concerning to me since Conor's standard bribe is fractional Milkbone nuggets!

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 24, 2018 03:36 PM (gwPgz)

45 "Eskimo dogs"? When I make Eskimo pies, that's the secret ingredient I use.

Posted by: Barack Obama at February 24, 2018 03:36 PM (/qEW2)

46 Archie the kitty looks just like WeaselCat v2 (except she's a girl)

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:36 PM (Sfs6o)

47 One cat, immobilized and humiliated.
=====

hogmartin, maybe the ultimate solution to medicating or clipping cats (snorfls).

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:38 PM (MIKMs)

48 46 Archie the kitty looks just like WeaselCat v2 (except she's a girl)
Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:36 PM (Sfs6o)

That's animal cruelty, forcibly assigning a pet's gender like that.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 03:42 PM (NWiLs)

49 >>>I am still trying to write down the funny stories about the kid, but not having much luck. Too sad, I guess.
Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:21 PM (MIKMs)

mustbequantum, when a friend of mine died suddenly and I was asked to speak at a memorial service, a friend told me to think of the people who would be there who had NOT known my friend so well, and that this was the chance to let them know about her.
Maybe that will help.

Posted by: m at February 24, 2018 03:43 PM (VKsXm)

50 I lost my childhood dog on my 10th birthday. Snowball was trying to tell me she was going. I missed all the signs - I was only almost 10 ya know.

Dad took me to a movie in the afternoon. He never did that. I should of known something was up.

Came home, lots of long faces, no Snowball waiting for me.

Do you see why I am like I am?

I*m a happy guy but boy I miss that dog.

Posted by: Tonypete at February 24, 2018 03:44 PM (tr2D7)

51 What makes me think God isn't pissed at humanity


Jesus Christ

The Holy Spirit

Scriptures

The apostles

The saints-both named and named

Creation-The beauty of nature, animals

People who care about me and pray for me


I'll post it again, Insomniac, even though this is the pet thread

How to pray when you're pissed at God or anyone else:

https://tinyurl.com/y9fgsbhn


And if you've really contemplating taking your own life sometimes, which you're mentioned several times in previous threads, I suggest you get help NOW, and if you don't you'll much screw up the life of your children for years to come

BTW

Or you could look at "Healing your inner child" for some resources online.

Sorry, folks to highjack the pet thread. It needed to be said

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 03:44 PM (8+Ozj)

52 50 I lost my childhood dog on my 10th birthday. Snowball was trying to tell me she was going. I missed all the signs - I was only almost 10 ya know.

Dad took me to a movie in the afternoon. He never did that. I should of known something was up.

Came home, lots of long faces, no Snowball waiting for me.

Do you see why I am like I am?

I*m a happy guy but boy I miss that dog.
Posted by: Tonypete at February 24, 2018 03:44 PM (tr2D7)

Shit, you made it all dusty in here.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 03:45 PM (NWiLs)

53 That's animal cruelty, forcibly assigning a pet's gender like that.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 03:42 PM (NWiLs)
------
I only did it after hearing female orange tabbies are rare or something.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:45 PM (Sfs6o)

54 Okay, guess I'll see if I can do this. Been putting it off for... five weeks now? I haven't even been able to look at the Pet Threads meanwhile, because I know it will hurt, because I have to write this.

Our gray cat Spark went out that Saturday night, just like every night of his life. Charlie went out, Spark went out behind him - I almost closed the door on the end of Spark's tail. That was the last Spark was seen.

You may remember me talking about the time we decided, on impulse, to take the long back way home, even though (or maybe because) it was late at night with tired kids. As we turned off the back highway, we saw a cardboard box on its side with two tiny gray kittens sitting on the grass, blinking bewideredly. They can't have been there very long. We stopped, scooped them up, and brought them home. To an already-large collection of critters.

Sixteen years ago. The male we named Spark and his sister we named Spirit.

Spark always got along with everybody. He was close to daughter's basset "Buddy," and became kind of a dog himself. He slept on dog Gimli's bed whereas all the other cats wanted to sleep on our bed. Sometimes Spark would be smack in the middle of Gimli's bed, and the doggie would sit there looking all bewildered. We'd move the cat so the dog could jump up (big bed, plenty of room for everybody).

Spark did not shy away from things as other cats do. He'd just turn his head and watch half-interestedly when the vacuum cleaner was roaring nearby.

Often, cats beg for their food and then sniff at it and turn away. Spark was always there on time for meals, and ate it all without complaint. Even when we bought the pate style by mistake instead of the shreads.

If Spark had a fault, it was that when you picked him up, the claws came out - not to fight, but to cling. It was good to have on thick shirts or denim coat or something. But he was so nice, such a good boy, and loved hugs and pets.

He was so dependable that when he didn't show up by the next morning, I had already lost all hope, but that didn't stop me from standing out in the yard calling for him, while cussing at begging the Almighty to send him home.

Much more to say, but not now. I'll just add, with the loss of Gimli we are without a dog for the first time in maybe twenty years, and now we are down to three cats - not counting the in-town fellow. This is the fewest pets we've had at home since the first two barn-cat litters in 1995.

Feeling the years.

Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)

55 51-I mean, of course, if you don't and take your own life you'll pretty much screw....

June Hunt "Hope For The heart" also has resources in dealing with recovering from abuse

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (8+Ozj)

56 So sorry mindful webworker. Condolences.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (Sfs6o)

57 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)

+++

That made me cry. So sorry for your losses. You made a very good home for your pets. I am positive they are eternally grateful.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (tcwn1)

58 A fun, cautionary tale.

Once upon a time, I had a guy that I worked with (union president, commie liberal) who was interested in me. I was NOT interested in him, but tolerated him. For the record, at the time he was in his early 50's. So... not a kid.

He had two Eskies. One fateful afternoon, he told me the story, in detail, of how you express the anal glands of a dog.

Note to all single morons: there is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.

Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (aT+Bx)

59 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)

Sorry, man.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 03:51 PM (NWiLs)

60 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)

That is a long time to have beloved animal members of your family. I am sorry for your losses.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 03:53 PM (8+Ozj)

61 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)


I am still waiting for my unexpected box. I may have to go looking for it instead.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at February 24, 2018 03:54 PM (2DOZq)

62 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)

I'm so sorry. {hugs}

Posted by: Jewells45 at February 24, 2018 03:54 PM (dUJdY)

63 There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.
Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (aT+Bx)


LOL.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 03:54 PM (8+Ozj)

64
They're bright, love to do tricks, and shed hair like crazy.


Just like the Horde! Must be true pet 'rons.

Posted by: Hands at February 24, 2018 03:54 PM (EzdLW)

65 Thank you, mindfulww. With my sympathy is also an appreciation of how you express love and remembrance. I hope that inspiration will help.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:59 PM (MIKMs)

66 One cat, immobilized and humiliated.
=====

hogmartin, maybe the ultimate solution to medicating or clipping cats (snorfls).

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 03:38 PM (MIKMs)


========

But doesn't that just push the problem back a step?

When I had a cat, I often thought the way to go would be a blowgun to immobilize it. Then go to town: clip the nails, shampoo it, clean the ears, brush the teeth, slip the pill down its throat, etc.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 03:59 PM (/qEW2)

67 There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.
Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (aT+Bx)
---
Imagine what his pillow talk would be like.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:00 PM (qJtVm)

68 Sorry to about Sparks MWW.

I hope you find a new four footed friend to help you heal, soon.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards...now with Black Panther Review at February 24, 2018 04:02 PM (xJa6I)

69 Feral cats are a huge problem in lots of places. My Karen took in eight of them plus one store bought cat. She tamed them, kept up all the vaccinations and never let them outside. In a 500 sq ft house. Plus me. I was not allowed consideration for a relationship until the cats okayed me. It was a zoo. All gone now and I haven't the heart to try again.

Weasel, from the last thread, be careful with blackberries. In western WA they'll take over a property if not kept under control. Goats will work but you're best off if you have a rent a goat guy for that. Those critters are incredible escape artists.

Posted by: Winston at February 24, 2018 04:02 PM (wgCUV)

70
I am very sorry, mindful. I hope there's closure for your family.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 04:03 PM (JxaIz)

71 Posted by: mindful webworker - missing a piece of my heart at February 24, 2018 03:46 PM (xzezz)
----

So sorry about Spark! How lucky you were to have him in your family.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:03 PM (qJtVm)

72 So sorry, MW. It's difficult now, but try to remember all the joy and laughs he brought over the years, not just the loss. Trust me, it helps.

Posted by: JTB at February 24, 2018 04:03 PM (V+03K)

73 I may have identified the perfect canditate for Moron Mascot.

(pet thread compliant)

http://bit.ly/2sSHf9u

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 04:08 PM (fuK7c)

74 And yes, Blackberries are pure evil. I culled a pile of them two weeks ago. The cuts are still healing.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards...now with Black Panther Review at February 24, 2018 04:08 PM (xJa6I)

75 Heartbreaking, Mindful Webworker. But a beautiful tribute to your little buddy as well.

Posted by: Ollie's girl at February 24, 2018 04:10 PM (6Wm6c)

76 The dog in the first pic is looking sideways at the camera. :-) "Are ya getting a good angle? Is the lighting good? Hurry up and take it."

Posted by: professor disarray, gumdrop gorilla channel at February 24, 2018 04:10 PM (tnOuI)

77 Wonderful pet photos!

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:10 PM (8+Ozj)

78
The late Moron Mascot:

http://soyaraborzoi.com/Sarge.htm

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 04:11 PM (JxaIz)

79 There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.
Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (aT+Bx)


========

Never heard of that before. What a revolting concept. If they can cause problems, why not remove them? They don't really seem essential to survival.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 04:12 PM (/qEW2)

80 There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.

Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM (aT+Bx)

---

Imagine what his pillow talk would be like.


Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:00 PM
---

Lord no.

He was a lifelong bachelor and had no real social skills with female. We suspect that the last time he got any kind of action was in the 70's. Which was... his fault.

Second moral of the story: if we want to have successful personal interactions with the opposite sex, we should make an effort to learn social skills.

Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 04:12 PM (aT+Bx)

81 Llamas are better weed eaters and you don't have the escape problem.

Posted by: Ben Had at February 24, 2018 04:13 PM (QAjh1)

82 Whose a good boy....the one that brings me beer and sammiches....the corgis can fark off those lil limbed queen
liz lezzies.

Posted by: saf at February 24, 2018 04:13 PM (cS/ge)

83 But doesn't that just push the problem back a step?

When I had a cat, I often thought the way to go would be a blowgun to immobilize it. Then go to town: clip the nails, shampoo it, clean the ears, brush the teeth, slip the pill down its throat, etc.
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 03:59 PM (/qEW2)


Well, there are two objectives - yeah, ideally you want to keep as much blood as you can on the inside, but it's always good to take a kitty down a notch when it needs it. Smug little fuzzy-butts.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:14 PM (y87Qq)

84 Nice pets Ya'll!......

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at February 24, 2018 04:14 PM (EoRCO)

85 Second moral of the story: if we want to have successful personal interactions with the opposite sex, we should make an effort to learn social skills.
Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 04:12 PM (aT+Bx)

How does one learn social skills, especially later in life? Some people, like myself, were very badly socialized and never learned the things that just seem to come naturally to nearly everyone else?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (NWiLs)

86 will not let eye linger on golden retriever puppy. Nope. Not going to do it.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (lwiT4)

87 Last sentence shouldn't have had a question mark. Stupid me strikes again.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (NWiLs)

88 Petsmart employee goes out of their way to help a sad doggie who misses their favorite discontinued toy:

https://tinyurl.com/y8ffngy9

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (8+Ozj)

89 How does one learn social skills, especially later
in life? Some people, like myself, were very badly socialized and never
learned the things that just seem to come naturally to nearly everyone
else?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (NWiLs)
=================

Study people. Mimic them. The pleasant ones I mean. Not the annoying ones. That's what I did.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)

90 Tips for improving social skills for shy and awkward adults:

https://www.succeedsocially.com

Other videos as all over the net

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (8+Ozj)

91 >>>There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.<<<

Is that what the kids are calling foreplay these days?

*hic* *shart* *cackle* *arf*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (bJ0w+)

92 Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)

Not that he has it, but that's what people with high functioning autism often-watch other people.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (8+Ozj)

93 90 Tips for improving social skills for shy and awkward adults:

https://www.succeedsocially.com

Other videos as all over the net
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (8+Ozj)

That looks interesting. Thanks.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (NWiLs)

94 I recently made a video to guilt a friend of mine into allowing my magnificent, spoiled Basset "Barley Hound" into his house.
It worked-Jason


How could your friend resist those soulful eyes? The bacon pic was classic. Was your friend the dark haired guy...bcz didn't see the dog in that one. Anyway, glad it worked.

Posted by: professor disarray, gumdrop gorilla channel at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (tnOuI)

95 Study people. Mimic them. The pleasant ones I mean. Not the annoying ones. That's what I did.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)

But then I have to be around people. *shudders*

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (NWiLs)

96 How does one learn social skills, especially later in life? Some people, like myself, were very badly socialized and never learned the things that just seem to come naturally to nearly everyone else?
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:15 PM (NWiLs)

++

I doubt, I doubt very much at all that you'd start talking about the anal gland expressing of dogs to a potential lady friend. I'm betting it would never even occur to you!

Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (tcwn1)

97 Study people. Mimic them. The pleasant ones I mean. Not the annoying ones. That's what I did.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)
---
No, we love you Grammie!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:20 PM (qJtVm)

98 Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (NWiLs)


What happened to going to see BB play? Ya know, just hanging out. I thought that sounded like a great way to dip your toe in. No expectations or pressure. But a way to get out of the house.

Posted by: professor disarray, gumdrop gorilla channel at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (tnOuI)

99 92 Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)

Not that he has it, but that's what people with high functioning autism often-watch other people.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (8+Ozj)

I'm probably not autistic in the organic sense, but have a whole host of other issues that put together look a bit like high-functioning autism/Aspergers.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (NWiLs)

100 Not that he has it, but that's what people with high functioning autism often-watch other people.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (8+Ozj)


Hah ... we're talking about one of my favorite topics here.

Insom ... you think you're On The Spectrum ? Hell - I wouldn't doubt it. You're Smart ... Hence Crazy. You don't get one without the other.

Pardner ... what do you want to know ?

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (fiGNd)

101 Adorable baby and puppy picture:

https://tinyurl.com/yb7vlnec

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (8+Ozj)

102 "How does one learn social skills, especially later
in life? Some people, like myself, were very badly socialized and never learned the things that just seem to come naturally to nearly everyone else? "

Remember to smile. I had to learn to do that. It doesn't come naturally to most people. People love a smiling face.

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (w7KSn)

103 But then I have to be around people. *shudders*

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (NWiLs)
==================

Go to a dog park. At least half the animate objects there will be pleasant, even if their owners are not. But It's been my experience that dog park people or humane society people are nice. Go hang out at the kennel.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (lwiT4)

104 But then I have to be around people. *shudders*
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (NWiLs)


And then you get your scent on them and the mother won't take them back...

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (y87Qq)

105 Has anyone determined why a cat is compelled to lie down on whatever you emplace?

Like, I put a small hankerchief down on a king-size bed and ONLY that tiny space will do to curl up.

Is it just a need to dominate and claim my stuff as his?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (qJtVm)

106 I doubt, I doubt very much at all that you'd start talking about the anal gland expressing of dogs to a potential lady friend. I'm betting it would never even occur to you!
Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (tcwn1)

Well, no, I wouldn't unless I knew she was a veterinarian or pet groomer or something. Probably not even then. But it doesn't really address the broader question.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (NWiLs)

107 Pet related. We were leaving the jewlers after getting Mrs. JTB's watch fixed. The window display caught my eye. There they were: sterling silver earrings with puppy paw prints cut into them. And they have the kind of loop (if that's the word) she prefers. Mrs. JTB rarely indulges herself but considering how we've had dogs for almost all our marriage, she couldn't resist.

Posted by: JTB at February 24, 2018 04:23 PM (V+03K)

108 Remember to smile. I had to learn to do that. It doesn't come naturally to most people. People love a smiling face.
Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (w7KSn)

I hate smiling. It makes me look like a total idiot.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:23 PM (NWiLs)

109 And then you get your scent on them and the mother won't take them back...
Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (y87Qq)

And I wouldn't blame her.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:23 PM (NWiLs)

110 Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (lwiT4)

And pet rescue places often have volunteers who walk the dogs. He could interact with the employees and then get to take doggies-which he likes- out for walks

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:24 PM (8+Ozj)

111 BREAKING: White House agrees to release Schiff memo with reductions.

http://cnn.it/2HJGO4z

Posted by: Michael the Texan at February 24, 2018 04:24 PM (nvMvs)

112 105 Has anyone determined why a cat is compelled to lie down on whatever you emplace?

Like, I put a small hankerchief down on a king-size bed and ONLY that tiny space will do to curl up.

Is it just a need to dominate and claim my stuff as his?
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (qJtVm)

I think it comes down to the cats = assholes axiom.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:24 PM (NWiLs)

113 I hate smiling. It makes me look like a total idiot.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:23 PM (NWiLs)

No, it doesn't. Stop telling yourself that!

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:24 PM (8+Ozj)

114 I used to be scared to death of people. Literally shaking scared. I could hardly leave my house. I still don't like to go to "functions". So I married a minister. Heh. Where I have to go to all the potlucks, and shake everybody's hand after church.


argle bargle

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (lwiT4)

115 Is it just a need to dominate and claim my stuff as his?


In my (involuntary, yet persisting) cat experience, yes.

Little bastard only takes pleasure in sleeping in prime places and proving that he's the most important critter in the 'verse.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (fuK7c)

116 Is it just a need to dominate and claim my stuff as his? Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (qJtVm)

Yes, and they like to curl up on something that has your scent if they like you-and I'm assuming they do. :^).

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (8+Ozj)

117 Well, no, I wouldn't unless I knew she was a veterinarian or pet groomer or something. Probably not even then. But it doesn't really address the broader question.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (NWiLs)

+++

On this site you come across as extremely intelligent, quick-witted, funny, and warm. I don't see how you could be much different than that in "real-life". You certainly know how to carry on a conversation.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (tcwn1)

118 Heh. Finished moving all the furniture out of the living room because we're restaining the floor. Kitteh status: Perturbed

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llamabutcher at February 24, 2018 04:26 PM (PkxCR)

119 I hate smiling. It makes me look like a total idiot.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:23 PM (NWiLs)

No, it makes you feel uncomfortable, but I'm guessing you look just fine.

We're not talking a creepy rictus grin here, Insom. Just a pleasant smile and a nod of the head.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:26 PM (qJtVm)

120 Fenelon - I was thinking about the walkies too.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:26 PM (lwiT4)

121 Has anyone determined why a cat is compelled to lie down on whatever you emplace?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:22 PM (qJtVm)


Or a single sheet of notebook paper in an otherwise empty room: the cat will perch on the paper. Not the corner, not the windowsill... the paper out in the middle of the floor.

If there is a thing, and there is a cat, the cat will be on the thing.

¯\_(ツ_/¯

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:27 PM (y87Qq)

122 Insom ... you think you're On The Spectrum ? Hell - I wouldn't doubt it. You're Smart ... Hence Crazy. You don't get one without the other.

Pardner ... what do you want to know ?
Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (fiGNd)

I don't necessarily think I'm on the spectrum, which I believe gets WAY overused. I just have a cluster of traits that result in somewhat similar behaviors.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:27 PM (NWiLs)

123

Study people. Mimic them. The pleasant ones I mean. Not the annoying ones. That's what I did.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:17 PM (lwiT4)

But then I have to be around people. *shudders*
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM



Bingo.

Okay, here's the thing. ( as Adrian Monk would say ).

**types rant about how normies don't understand how some people need more help than just a nifty little "social skills" course**

**deletes, because this is the pet thread**

Posted by: Hands at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (EzdLW)

Posted by: Hands at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (EzdLW)

125 Not that he has it, but that's what people with high functioning autism often-watch other people.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:18 PM (8+Ozj)

I'm probably not autistic in the organic sense, but have a whole host of other issues that put together look a bit like high-functioning autism/Aspergers.
Posted by: Insomniac


Word. Suspected but never diagnosed, and I know I have a half-brother who's full autistic, so it's probably lurking. Frankly the acting classes I took while younger are probably what's gotten me this far. Aside from that, I'm a damned trainwreck.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Penitent Cylon at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (lLeln)

126 Smile with your eyes.

I rarely laugh in-person.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (Ckg4U)

127 Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at February 24, 2018 04:26 PM (qJtVm)

LOL. Yeah, he doesn't have to look like Jack Nicholson and " Heeeeere's Johhny" from "The Shining" ;^)

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (8+Ozj)

128 "I hate smiling."

Practice in front of a mirror.
Learn to like yourself.

I don't know your gender, but especially men, when older and frowning, can be downright scary looking.

Someone showed me a picture they took of me when I wasn't prepared for it, I was frowning and looking downward. It changed my life. From then on, I was determined to smile more often, don't look downward in a dejected way. Comb the hair. Shave. Smell nice. Remember names of the people you meet. (That one is really difficult) Today I think I can name 2500 or so people I know, and their wives and children. It takes work.

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:29 PM (w7KSn)

129 **types rant about how normies don't understand how some people need more help than just a nifty little "social skills" course**

I understand that. I have a kid on the spectrum, but it's a start.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (8+Ozj)

130 114 I used to be scared to death of people. Literally shaking scared. I could hardly leave my house. I still don't like to go to "functions". So I married a minister. Heh. Where I have to go to all the potlucks, and shake everybody's hand after church.


argle bargle
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (lwiT4)

I think they call that immersion therapy.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (NWiLs)

131 When Cinnamon leaves us I think my wife wants a dog, I always loved Husky breed.

Beef up your gate, extend the height of your fence, and watch for digging. Huskies really are escape artists.

Oh, and don't be surprised if your future husky chews up thin metal or plastic "kennel" containers.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - It's OK, I'm with the banned at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (IcT7t)

132 Insom ... the answer is really kinda' simple. It's one of those things that - once you figure it out - makes you want to slap yourself.

Some people just grow up, develop all their habits, and that kinda' dictates how they'll live the rest of their lives.

But you ... My Man ... you got A Great Big Fucking Gift. I'm not joking.

You still have time to PICK the kind of personality you want. So just look around - pick the personality you want - and then build that. Before you know it - you won't even have to think about it. You'll just do it.

What kind of Personality do you want ?

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (fiGNd)

133 LOL. Yeah, he doesn't have to look like Jack Nicholson and " Heeeeere's Johhny" from "The Shining" ;^)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 24, 2018 04:28 PM (8+Ozj)

+++

LOL. What a thought.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (tcwn1)

134
One fateful afternoon, he told me the story, in detail, of how you express the anal glands of a dog.

Note to all single morons: there is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.
Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 03:50 PM



Well, if you were both veterinarians, it might work.

Posted by: Hands at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (EzdLW)

135 I have to practice smiling. My face just naturally goes into a I Hate You look. Not appealing. So now I practice pulling my mouth muscles back.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (lwiT4)

136 People don't change.

Posted by: Greg House, M.D. at February 24, 2018 04:32 PM (EzdLW)

137 Today I think I can name 2500 or so people I know, and their wives and children. It takes work.
Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:29 PM (w7KSn)

Wow. I guess I'm an even bigger ass than I thought (and that's saying something). I don't even want to know 2500 people, much less their families.

Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:32 PM (12Ea6)

138 ScoggDog - you are right on target.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:32 PM (lwiT4)

139 What kind of Personality do you want ?
Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (fiGNd)


If anyone ever offers me this opportunity and I don't immediately choose "Johnny from Airplane!", feel free to gut-punch me.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:33 PM (y87Qq)

140 I know maybe 8 people.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:33 PM (lwiT4)

141 But then I have to be around people. *shudders*
--

You have to be around people, but not necessarily interact with them.

Go to the mall. Put in earbuds. Pretend you're listening to music.

Then.. observe.

Posted by: shibumi at February 24, 2018 04:33 PM (aT+Bx)

142 14 ... Hadrian,

Congratulations on the wins today. You must have an exceptional group.

Posted by: JTB at February 24, 2018 04:34 PM (V+03K)

143 I think they call that immersion therapy.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (NWiLs)
===================

Oh no. They're Lutherans.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:34 PM (lwiT4)

144 Remember names of the people you meet. (That one is really difficult)


I have a couple of workarounds for that.

One is to assume that the other person is as bad with names as I am, or to pretend that assumption in a disarming way. So, "I know we've met. My name is Mike".

(That should be enough of a clue for someone to say, "of course, Mike, I'm Susan". But if Susan doesn't get it she won't repeat her own name).

The other is the flat out "I'm sorry, I'm really bad at names. I'm Mike, you are...?"

For unexplained reasons I'm OK with the names of really good looking girls.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 04:34 PM (fuK7c)

145
Has anyone determined why a cat is compelled to lie down on whatever you emplace?

=====

Guess it depends on the cat. My current Cat does that. My previous cats chewed like puppies on my stuff. Of course, I got snuffly a while ago when I found some books with chewed corners from the past cat.

Posted by: mustbequantum at February 24, 2018 04:34 PM (MIKMs)

146 Insomniac, I think you should try to model yourself after all the talking heads on CNN.

Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:35 PM (12Ea6)

147
I think they call that immersion therapy.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (NWiLs)


Baptism by fire hose.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at February 24, 2018 04:35 PM (JxaIz)

148 Weasel, from the last thread, be careful with blackberries. In western WA they'll take over a property if not kept under control. Goats will work but you're best off if you have a rent a goat guy for that. Those critters are incredible escape artists.
Posted by: Winston at February 24, 2018 04:02 PM (wgCUV)
--------
Thanks for the tip! I suspect I already have a bunch on the property, and I usually manage to kill anything that I plant. Let's just say my farming skills are underdeveloped.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 04:36 PM (Sfs6o)

149 I am in a profession where I meet a lot of people.
Nothing worse than someone coming up to me and asking "Don't you remember me?"
I had a guy come up to me and ask me that, recently. I hadn't seen him in 35 years. I named him, asked about his wife (she passed) and asked him if he still lived in (x).

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:36 PM (w7KSn)

150 I second Grammie's recommendation. Dog parks are wonderful for socializing without pressure. We moved to a new state after living in the old one for 35 years. First thing I did was look for the dog park. I'm not really outgoing, but have run into the nicest people, no cranks. It's not just dog owners. There's a lovely older couple who come for their daily walk there, just to be around dogs as they can't have one in their condo. People love their dogs and will talk to anyone who likes them. When you've had enough, you just leave.

Posted by: Ollie's girl at February 24, 2018 04:37 PM (6Wm6c)

151 Someone's probably thought of this before- a compilation of the funniest online dating profiles.

"I'm a dog person. In fact, if you have a dog, I can even express its glands for you before your very eyes. Save you a trip to the vet. That's how into it I am. What about it?"

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at February 24, 2018 04:37 PM (/qEW2)

152 Of course, there is nothing wrong with just asking the person "Sorry, please remind me of your name".

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:38 PM (w7KSn)

153 There is no world in which a female wants to hear about how to express the anal glands of a dog. Unless she asks you first.

Is that what the kids are calling foreplay these days?


Yes, regrettably, it's true, standards have fallen. Now that we're competing with the amateurs, we can't afford to invest in little extras like story, production value, ...

Posted by: Jackie Shoehorn at February 24, 2018 04:38 PM (S+f+m)

154 You can always just paint a smile on your face like the Joker.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at February 24, 2018 04:38 PM (2DOZq)

155 On this site you come across as extremely intelligent, quick-witted, funny, and warm. I don't see how you could be much different than that in "real-life". You certainly know how to carry on a conversation.
Posted by: washrivergal at February 24, 2018 04:25 PM (tcwn1)

The anonymity afforded by the Internet takes my social phobia out of the equation, which helps a lot.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:38 PM (NWiLs)

156 I talked to myself all the time to develop tone, cadence and timing.

I speak like I type.

Talk to me on the phone and as I read this post to you, you'll never be able to separate my posts from my voice again.

I practiced this shit out loud so I wouldn't sound like an idiot when I spoke to people.

I'm not the brightest bulb in the fuckin' house, but it took practice.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:39 PM (Ckg4U)

157 ScoggDog - you are right on target.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:32 PM (lwiT4)


*winks*

And I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm this way because I chose to be. And I LIKE being the Smart Redneck.

But I ain't gonna' lie ... in Elementary and Middle School ... it scared the shit out of me. The knowledge that I simply did not have a personality. Everything had to be thought out. It sucked.

But damn ... how awesome is it to get that far and then get to PICK what you want to be ?

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:39 PM (fiGNd)

158 143 I think they call that immersion therapy.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:30 PM (NWiLs)
===================

Oh no. They're Lutherans.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:34 PM (lwiT4)

*snort*

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:40 PM (NWiLs)

159 Insomniac is going to come up with a bad case of kennel cough, I just know it.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:40 PM (lwiT4)

160 I second Grammie's recommendation. Dog parks are wonderful for socializing without pressure.


Nah. Insom should hang around playgrounds. Epecially like Catholic school ones where the girls wear the plaid skirts. That will get him some socializing experience.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 04:41 PM (fuK7c)

161 What kind of Personality do you want ?
Posted by: ScoggDog at February 24, 2018 04:31 PM (fiGNd)

I'm not really sure.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:42 PM (NWiLs)

162 "I'm not really sure."
-Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:42 PM (NWiLs)

*Pick Me! Pick Me!*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:43 PM (Ckg4U)

163 I play at a club every Monday night. It has a bouncer. A big ugly dude. Everyone just walks by him, doesn't really notice him at all.
My first night there, I introduced myself, asked what is his name. Shook his hand.
His face lit up. Big smile. Big laugh. Now I know him, his name, his kids, his multiple wives (including the divorcee). Turns out he is the most cheerful fellow.
Plus no one f*cks with me while play my gig. LOL!

Posted by: navybrat at February 24, 2018 04:44 PM (w7KSn)

164 146 Insomniac, I think you should try to model yourself after all the talking heads on CNN.
Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:35 PM (12Ea6)

Why are you trying to sabotage me? What did I ever do to you?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:44 PM (NWiLs)

165 Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 24, 2018 04:41 PM (fuK7c)

Interactions with law enforcement and the court system isn't really what I had in mind.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:45 PM (NWiLs)

166 I'm not really sure.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:42 PM (NWiLs)
=================

Smart. Witty. Kind. Fair. Common Sense. Doesn't go out with his fly down. Also likes : (fill in a hobby)

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:45 PM (lwiT4)

167 103 But then I have to be around people. *shudders*

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:19 PM (NWiLs)
==================

Go to a dog park. At least half the animate objects there will be pleasant, even if their owners are not. But It's been my experience that dog park people or humane society people are nice. Go hang out at the kennel.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:21 PM (lwiT4)

Yep.

Getting a dog and walking it in the dog park will change your life.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards...now with Black Panther Review at February 24, 2018 04:45 PM (xJa6I)

168 Insomniac, I think you should try to model yourself after all the talking heads on CNN.
-Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:35 PM (12Ea6)

"Why are you trying to sabotage me? What did I ever do to you?"
-Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:44 PM (NWiLs)

Yeah, dude. Not Cool.

[ ]Plussed
[x] Nonplussed

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:46 PM (Ckg4U)

169 159 Insomniac is going to come up with a bad case of kennel cough, I just know it.
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:40 PM (lwiT4)

Distemper.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:46 PM (NWiLs)

170 Also likes : (fill in a hobby)
Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:45 PM (lwiT4)


I'm not sure this is going to end up in a good place.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:46 PM (y87Qq)

171 I'm not sure this is going to end up in a good place.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 24, 2018 04:46 PM (y87Qq)
==================

I see your point.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:47 PM (lwiT4)

172 BTW... *YAY* Doggies and Kitties!!!

...yeah, I make "that voice" when I get to know silly, loveable pets.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (Ckg4U)

173 Insomniac, I think you should try to model yourself after all the talking heads on CNN.
-Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:35 PM (12Ea6)

"Why are you trying to sabotage me? What did I ever do to you?"
-Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:44 PM (NWiLs)

Yeah, dude. Not Cool.

[ ]Plussed
[x] Nonplussed
Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:46 PM (Ckg4U)

I didn't tell him to mimic MSNBC people. Just trying to keep him classy and stuff.

Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (12Ea6)

174
Interactions with law enforcement and the court system isn't really what I had in mind.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:45 PM (NWiLs)


So now you're getting picky

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (lKyWE)

175 We have 4 inside-outside cats that we're batting .500 on getting fixed. The momma cat and one male have been TNR'd.

Momma (aka Black Betty) is more of the "inside" kind of cat. Her kids, not so much... hence the name.

Ram Jam - "Black Betty" '77

Posted by: Deplorable Redneck Bitter Clinger at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (iiixZ)

176 But don't WANNA be a liberal homo!

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:49 PM (NWiLs)

177 Insomniac - do you have any hobbies? If so, try to find people with the same interests. I used to do a lot of hiking and volunteered with a trail club doing trail maintenance. Met a bunch of people that way.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (Sfs6o)

178 "I didn't tell him to mimic MSNBC people. Just trying to keep him classy and stuff."
-Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (12Ea6)

Please allow me to take that particular shovel and put it back in the shed. I happen to like you.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (Ckg4U)

179 Speaking of dogs, Soros' pet at National Review Mona Charen left a poo at CPAC just now.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (6FqZa)

180 177 Insomniac - do you have any hobbies? If so, try to find people with the same interests. I used to do a lot of hiking and volunteered with a trail club doing trail maintenance. Met a bunch of people that way.
Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (Sfs6o)

Used to.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (NWiLs)

181 Also likes : long nighttime helicopter rides.

Posted by: Pinochet at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (SkuXa)

182
But don't WANNA be a liberal homo!
====================


Well dear, sometimes these things just .... happen. We won't judge.

Posted by: grammie winger - at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (lwiT4)

183 181 Also likes : long nighttime helicopter rides.
Posted by: Pinochet at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (SkuXa)

Shoving commie scum onto the beach from 3,000 feet, sunsets and the soothing sounds of Neil Sedaka

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:52 PM (NWiLs)

184 My yard was made for a dog with a smaller fenced in area than the whole yard. I improved it making it a bit larger and better gates, mostly to try and keep out groundhogs and other big rodents.

Posted by: Skip at February 24, 2018 04:52 PM (aC6Sd)

185 Marry me.

Posted by: Pinochet at February 24, 2018 04:53 PM (SkuXa)

186
Used to.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (NWiLs)
------
Well it may be time to start doing the things you used to enjoy again. It's an opportunity to meet new people and have fun in the process.

Posted by: Weasel at February 24, 2018 04:53 PM (Sfs6o)

187 "I didn't tell him to mimic MSNBC people. Just trying to keep him classy and stuff."
-Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:48 PM (12Ea6)

Please allow me to take that particular shovel and put it back in the shed. I happen to like you.
Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (Ckg4U)

How about NPR?

Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:53 PM (12Ea6)

188 Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:50 PM (Ckg4U)

How about NPR?
Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:53 PM (12Ea6)

Great. Liberal, gay, AND boring.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:54 PM (NWiLs)

189 Chess Dress Nood

Posted by: Skip at February 24, 2018 04:54 PM (aC6Sd)

190 "Great. Liberal, gay, AND boring."
-Posted by: Insomniac at February 24, 2018 04:54 PM (NWiLs)

At least you now have a peculiar voice.

*shrugs*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:55 PM (Ckg4U)

191 Insomniac #38: Doggehs are the only thing that makes me think God has some tiny piece of kindness somewhere...

I'd count this as progress in Insomniac's path to greater faith.

Puppy steps.

Posted by: mindful webworker - Dog loves you at February 24, 2018 04:55 PM (pQplJ)

192 "I'd count this as progress in Insomniac's path to greater faith."

Dude is full of goodness.

He is like a nougaty-center in a non-gay way.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at February 24, 2018 04:57 PM (Ckg4U)

193 Bonus: men with dogs are highly susceptible to women stopping for a short chat. Whenever we have the dog with us and I have to run into the store, there is always a woman talking to him and the dog when I come out.

Posted by: Ollie's girl at February 24, 2018 04:57 PM (6Wm6c)

194 "What kind of friend would need this video to allow that cutie into his house? You and Barley Hound are invited to stop by anytime you want. Thanks for sharing this video."

A friend who is basically a neutered sock puppet with his wife's hand shoved up his ass, moving his mouth.

Thanks for the invite, we'll be by tomorrow night. Barley Hound like bunnies.

Posted by: Jason M at February 24, 2018 05:02 PM (S1+dw)

195 >>>I know maybe 8 people.
Posted by: grammie winger<<<

It's your cooking. No, really.

Posted by: Fritz at February 24, 2018 05:03 PM (bJ0w+)

196 Thanks for the chuckles guys. Some good advice given here but w/ a lot of humorous asides. And great looking pets displayed here, as usual.

Posted by: Farmer at February 24, 2018 05:14 PM (lfXAE)

197 Adorable pets in the pics

Posted by: kallisto at February 24, 2018 05:28 PM (1F6Sr)

198 Still thinking of last week pic of beagle sitting on top of black cat.

Posted by: kallisto at February 24, 2018 05:31 PM (1F6Sr)

199 I don't even want to know 2500 people, much less their families.

Posted by: weirdflunky at February 24, 2018 04:32 PM (12Ea6)


Suddenly I feel like I belong!

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 24, 2018 05:32 PM (gwPgz)

200 Thank you to all for your responses about Spark. I knew I'd be in sympathetic community. Thanks.

Posted by: mindful webworker - smile and the world laughs at you at February 24, 2018 05:42 PM (pQplJ)

201 Nobody wants to smile like Jim Carrey in Dumb & Dumber. Gotta learn, even practice in the mirror as someone said. Non-vainly, besides. Practicing the gift of a nice expression.

You think smiling makes you look like an idiot, what about a goofy laugh!?!

My older brother could be a jerk (God bless him), but he had a really nice smile and an honest, hearty laugh. I strove to emulate them. In my own style.

For those of us on the non-typical learners spectrum, it's not acting or faking or mimicking - it's learning ordinary skills, with effort, what for others comes naturally.

Posted by: mindful webworker - laugh and they leave you alone at February 24, 2018 05:58 PM (pQplJ)

202 I scored BIG TIME last week!!! I clipped both cats's back nails singlehandedly without losing a single drop of blood or even a single skin cell. Of course, one of the cats was a Persian, so I'm not sure that counts as two cats. (Neither has front claws. Not my idea. They came that way. I know that's cheating, but those hind class can be damn dangerous when the car puts its mind to it.)

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with Only Two Deplorable Cats at February 24, 2018 06:52 PM (012yj)

203 And yes, Blackberries are pure evil. I culled a pile of them two weeks ago. The cuts are still healing.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards...now with Black Panther Review at February 24, 2018 04:08 PM (xJa6I)

The berries sure are yummy, though.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 24, 2018 08:00 PM (Dbv1R)

204 Really cute group of pets this week!

How does phenobarbital get into dog food, anyway? Was it accidental, or malicious...?

Noodle the Cat got a bad can of cheap (Chinese) cat food about eight years ago and suffered some of the mentioned effects. Her eyes looked weird and she kept jerking and toppling over. It was terrifying. By the time we got her to the vet the episode was over, though, and she just seemed sleepy. There really wasn't anything the vet could do, but we hung out for a couple of hours so they could observe her. So ironic, because the reason she got the cheap cat food in the first place was because we were really struggling financially at the time.

Posted by: Gem at February 25, 2018 05:56 AM (XoAz8)

205 "Disguise and Seek" is a enjoyable recreation for canine to play.

Posted by: dog toys made in usa at March 21, 2018 07:54 PM (Mot3U)

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