Gender-Swapped "Lord of the Flies" Remake Draws, Get This, Outrage from SJWs, Because Apparently Women Aren't Capable of Cruelty or Tribalism

You can only gender-swap male to female characters if it's a cool thing, like being Thor or a Ghostbuster.

Gender-swap women into a story about people doing bad things? That's just the Patriarchy on Steroids.

“Lord of the Flies,” you might be surprised to learn from much of the press this week, is not about humanity’s inherently fallen nature. Nor is it about the dangerously thin line between civilization and savagery. If your high school English teacher taught you that, please publicly shame her immediately. No, “Lord of the Flies” has one central focus, and one focus only. Coincidentally, it’s the same central obsessive focus shared by our current tribe of batty leading feminists: Toxic masculinity.
Women Are Never Evil, You Sick Chauvinist Pigs
“An all women remake of Lord of the Flies makes no sense because…the plot of the book wouldn’t happen with all women,” New York Times columnist Roxane Gay declared on Twitter, making me wonder if she’s ever been to a sixth-grade slumber party. (If you haven’t been to one, know this: They almost always degenerate into a pillow-strewn wasteland of popcorn, treachery, and copious weeping.)
Other writers joked that a female “Lord of the Flies” would obviously and inevitably morph into a peaceful island paradise--you know, like the very real place where Wonder Woman grew up. By my personal scientific assessment, there is a 99 percent probability that anyone who makes this point has never spent significant time in a sorority house, where there is often unlimited cereal, a frozen yogurt machine, and occasional tales of terror that would make your hair stand on end.

“Not every story makes sense to gender-flip,” wrote Yohana Desta at Vanity Fair. “Particularly if that story is William Golding’s classic Lord of the Flies, a vicious tale about a barbaric boy-made society. The concept alone,” she continues, “disregards the point of the book!”
Get it? “The point of the book” is that boys--just boys!--are inherently bad.

Apparently the gender-swap retelling violates two key (false) claims of the Female Supremacist narrative: That women are totally peaceful and a world (or island) ruled by women would have no conflict, and that women all get along with each other. Which by the way seems to be an aspiration they wish to will into being by simply insisting that it's the reality. The stridency of the propaganda on this point has a real The Lady Doth Protest Too Much quality to it -- they seem to know that many women just do not get along, but want to imagineer a new reality into existence by claiming the world is other than it is.

Posted by: Ace at 06:07 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 I'll get the others

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:09 PM (pPKG5)

2 It's like the Diversity and Comics guy complains -- a lesbian relationship happens if you just put two lesbians within 10 feet of each other. BOOM. Instant relationship. Because all women like each other and all women get along all the time.

Posted by: sunny-dee at September 05, 2017 06:10 PM (QAOZh)

3
The Lords of My Flatbush.

Problem solved.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:10 PM (mbhDw)

4 I got their gender swap right here.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at September 05, 2017 06:10 PM (5VlCp)

5
When I think Lord of the Flies, I think of Obama with that fly landing on his lip.

Sums it up.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:11 PM (mbhDw)

6 Less impaling, more impugning.

Less stabbing, more back-biting.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (yE+j4)

7 I can't imagine any women behaving like that.

Posted by: Sarah Palin at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (QtQaN)

8 Here's an idea, let's just rewrite the entire book.

Posted by: Hollywood at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (w1zJX)

9 What about Wonderwoman?

Posted by: Eromero at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (zLDYs)

10 Didn't they already make an all-female Lord of the Flies? I thought it was called The View.

Posted by: Aunt Luna at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (Zd2ZF)

11 Scissoring. You know it's coming up.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at September 05, 2017 06:12 PM (tbOMB)

12 Yeah, right.

Posted by: Lady MacBeth at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (O34tS)

13
Corgi Status:

[ _ ] Not called
[ X ] Called

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (mbhDw)

14 I can't wait for the cries from the SJWs about fat shaming a girl by naming her Piggy.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (z/Ubi)

15 Brenda Spencer would disagree.

Posted by: Dang at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (8b+oT)

16 I'm starting to think every academic institution in our country needs to be drone striked.

Seriously, do young women wake up one morning and suddenly discover toxic masculinity as a part of being WOKE?

They have to be getting taught this shit somewhere, and I doubt it's coming from the parents.

Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (+dsLj)

17 Miss Tami, I noted you absence on the ONT last night.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (w1zJX)

18
Gender-swap women into a story about people doing bad things? That's just the Patriarchy on ~~Steroids~~ ESTROGEN.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (ApM8l)

19 I hope this version includes the monkey butlers.

Posted by: I may be mixing a few things up at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (QpZB2)

20 T20

Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (Sfs6o)

21 I was assigned Lord Of The Flies in high school and...I'll be hoenst, so many descriptions of naked boys glistening in the sun I concluded it was some weird pedo fantasy.

I get the point, but it creeped me out.

The shit where the one kid talks with Satan was cool as fuck, though.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (mknWS)

22 Well then the story should have been a big we all worked together to overcome nature without any diversity

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (pPKG5)

23
Maybe if they formed cliques and gossiped and were verbally abusive to each other, you'd have a story.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (mbhDw)

24 Children acting like children about a book of children acting like children.

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (XFue2)

25 Favored Groups must always be shown in glowing terms.

Equality must be selective.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (oVJmc)

26 Horseshit. It would be just as savage.

Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (0mRoj)

27 Probably won't be funny either.

Posted by: DeadSockPosting at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (FhXTo)

28 2 It's like the Diversity and Comics guy complains -- a lesbian relationship happens if you just put two lesbians within 10 feet of each other. BOOM. Instant relationship. Because all women like each other and all women get along all the time.
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 05, 2017 06:10 PM (QAOZh)

I'm pretty sure that is documented proof in thousands of hours of video across multiple internet sites.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (z/Ubi)

29 These are not serious people. It's embarrassing to be alive in a time when far too many people do take the seriously.

Posted by: JackStraw at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (/tuJf)

30 Isle of Lesbos, I promise to be gentle. Just lie back and enjoy it.

Posted by: Hurricane Irma at September 05, 2017 06:14 PM (bc2Lc)

31 Oh, and I remember my teacher playing an audio interview of Golding explaining that the reason it was all boys was he didn't want to have to address sex.

Still say it was a pedo fantasy, though.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (mknWS)

32 So Hillary's pointing to the There's Something About Mary 'eight minute abs' scene and in her telling Bernie is like the Ben Afleck character and she's the psycho murderer.

That seems about right.

Posted by: Steve Earle Song Ideas at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (PvCxa)

33 I prefer to work with guys and hang around guys. (Yes, I know friendship is impossible with Pooky looming over them with a machete.) My limited experience with women in the workplace wasn't horrible, but we all heard stories.

Posted by: pookysgirl at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (XKZwp)

34 So, all the girls get together and kill the fat girl.

This is NOT fiction.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (oVJmc)

35 This is the most stupidist thing I have heard all day.

Posted by: freaked at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (BO/km)

36 14 I can't wait for the cries from the SJWs about fat shaming a girl by naming her Piggy.
Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (z/Ubi)

I'm shocked the Muppets have not been targeted. For that as well as having - gasp! - a man do her voice!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (mbhDw)

37 Funny thing, in my last job all the women I worked with prayed we wouldn't get anymore female coworkers coming into our division because drama.

Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (+dsLj)

38 Anyway, didn't they already do an all female version of Lord Of The Flies?

Mean Girls, or something?

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (mknWS)

39 I am totally hydrated, and eating normally - like not coming off a multiday fast or anything - and yet I find it hard to muster anything approaching a shit about this subject.
However, I have decided to have pancakes for dinner.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (CwFiP)

40

See what I mean about the Left SANCTIONING everything today?

This movie cannot be made because it wasn't sanctioned by the Leftist Overseers.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (ApM8l)

41 Another movie to miss. Are there no original ideas left? Everything is a damn remake or sequel.

Posted by: NCKate at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (QpIrM)

42 34 So, all the girls get together and kill the fat girl.

This is NOT fiction.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (oVJmc)

"Paging Lena Dunham! We need you on set!"

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (mbhDw)

43 Yeah, because there's no such thing as Mean Girls in school, who will harass someone until she develops an eating disorder, or commits suicide.

I was far more afraid of the Mean Girls than I was the bully who would pick on me until I decked him during a lunchtime football game.

Posted by: Pug Mahon at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (sGSvK)

44 So will the directors be burned like Wicker Man?

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (398bZ)

45 If someone just did a remake without any females it would have raised a outcry as well.

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (pPKG5)

46 "Boys are icky and have a weenus, so we hate them."
-Every feminist, everywhere.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (xJa6I)

47 However, I have decided to have pancakes for dinner.
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (CwFiP)

Put out a plate for me.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (mknWS)

48 Hey, if you're going to make an all female remake of anything...is it called a "period piece?" Or is that something else?

Posted by: Inappropirate Guy at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (6oxFW)

49 Seriously, do young women wake up one morning and suddenly discover toxic masculinity as a part of being WOKE?

They have to be getting taught this shit somewhere, and I doubt it's coming from the parents.

It's taught at the same place where several Morons learned that all women are money grubbing serial cheaters, who exist solely to crush their souls and see them ruined in Divorce Court.

Life can brutal.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (yE+j4)

50
Last comment before the line of thunderstorms gets my ass. The *perfect* relationship is two women, right?

So why do two women inevitably end up breaking up over who takes the trash out?

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (EgwCt)

51 Got a female ranking number 4 in America's most prolific serial killers list.

Jane Toppan. 31 killed.

Posted by: Dang at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (8b+oT)

52 Slap fight!

Posted by: wth at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (HgMAr)

53 Now if the remake turned into hardcore busty lesbian porn, I promise you, it would make money.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (xJa6I)

54 "a lesbian relationship happens if you just put two lesbians within 10 feet of each other. BOOM."

When I sold real estate I had a lesbian client. Every time she changed grrrl friends, I got two sales, her old house and her new one.

She was a favorite of mine.

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (3myMJ)

55 37 Funny thing, in my last job all the women I worked with prayed we wouldn't get anymore female coworkers coming into our division because drama.
Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (+dsLj)

Ever see the movie "The Women" with Joan Crawford and Norma Shearer?

I wonder if that would fly today. "Fly." Hey, I made a funny ha-ha yoke-um.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (mbhDw)

56 and yet I find it hard to muster anything approaching a shit
-------------

Well, if they are whole-grain pancakes, they may clear that right up.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (w1zJX)

57 And these are the very same people that say that gender is just a social construct. They seem to have a lot of flexibility in their beliefs.

Posted by: JackStraw at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (/tuJf)

58 It doesn't give the new title. How about "Queen of the Bees"?

You would also have to change more than just the sexes. Little girls would devolve to savagery in their own gender-specific ways. I would love to read something imaginative by someone who had some insight on how girls would behave in their own made up society.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (FUu/Z)

59 freaked - Did you just get up?

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (pPKG5)

60 How are the east coast leftists going to feel about those toxic men rescuing them? Or are they going to wait for Sheena and the amazons to save them?

Posted by: gNewt at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (j8uQ3)

61 There is no truth to the rumor I patterned my campaign after Lord Of The Flies. For example, I did not use a conch shell during the campaign. Not once. And there were several other differences, though I can't really think of them off-hand.

Posted by: Hillary => at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (XlbwU)

62 Maybe they'll make Hillary! head of the tribe so when it fucks up she can blame it on men.

Posted by: tu3031 at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (O5Q3r)

63 It's taught at the same place where several Morons learned that all women are money grubbing serial cheaters, who exist solely to crush their souls and see them ruined in Divorce Court.

Life can brutal.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (yE+j4)

Lynnwood, Wa?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (xJa6I)

64 47 However, I have decided to have pancakes for dinner.
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:16 PM (CwFiP)

Put out a plate for me.
Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (mknWS)

Potatoes au gratin, with a nice salad at the Chez.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (mbhDw)

65 So, are the nekkid pillow fight scenes still in?

Posted by: Bruce at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (8ikIW)

66 Ask any sane woman and she will readily admit woman are far more vicious than men.

Posted by: Paul Ryan at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (Bek89)

67 Pretty sure I remember reading about mommy monkeys bashing the skulls of other mommy monkey's babies when they got the chance. Reduce competition, you understand.

And one can only assume there are no LaShaniquas pulling hoop earrings out of the other girls ears in the movie. That just wouldn't do, even though it's as common as white bread.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Bama's Boot Stomping on the Face of College Football - Forever at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (rjrh3)

68 I prefer to work with guys and hang around guys. (Yes, I know friendship is impossible with Pooky looming over them with a machete.) My limited experience with women in the workplace wasn't horrible, but we all heard stories.

***********************************

We used to have someone (this was before I came in) who fraudulently claimed someone pushed a file cabinet on her so she could get workers comp. He insane antics went on for years and even forced my coworkers to have to go to court to testify. She claimed nobody heard her scream and cry for help even though she was only 30 feet away. One of my coworkers had testified that they could hear her talking on the phone from the next building, that's how loud she was.

To this day as far as I know she had never been fired from her job which was... wait for it, a civil service job.

Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (+dsLj)

69 boys have a penis
girls have a penis envy

Posted by: little kid at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (HgMAr)

70 Do they feel RAPED by Hollywood?

Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (mcI77)

71 The whole world isn't anything but stupid anymore

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (pPKG5)

72 Maybe they should try a remake that flips the genders from women to men. Like Ghostbusters.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (398bZ)

73 Family Guy already did it. The wymens only lasted two hours before they killed each other.

Posted by: Strobe at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (gbWkA)

74 Slippery Slope - Where are you?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (w1zJX)

75 On first impression, I thought this remake was a terrible, idiotic idea - but now I WANT TO SEE IT HAPPEN!!!

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (k1TUh)

76 69 boys have a penis
girls have a penis envy
Posted by: little kid at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (HgMAr)

So does Obama.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (mbhDw)

77 Pretty sure Real Housewives of [Metropolitan City X] belies the narrative of a femalian utopia.

So Lord of the Female Flies is totally, inevitably, assuredly possible. Why anyone would pay to see it is another matter.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (H8S+R)

78 Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (w1zJX)

Do you mean me or the lovely Tami?

I was there long enough to see my name of the WoS, and decide I needed to give it a rest!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (yE+j4)

79 Get back to me when they make a gender-swap remake of Band Of Brothers ... er Sisters.

Posted by: ShainS at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (IKICP)

80 no one has ever seen those videos of young ladies beating the snot out of each other? perish the thought.

I wonder what the reaction would be if it were all boys but all Black. Hoohaw.

Posted by: mallfly suPreme at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (ILitO)

81 If we can control the climate of the entire planet why can't we turn one silly hurricane out to sea?

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (3myMJ)

82 And these are the very same people that say that gender is just a social
construct. They seem to have a lot of flexibility in their beliefs.

And they can totally be like Navy Seals. And Army Rangers. Yes, we can!

Posted by: tu3031 at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (O5Q3r)

83 You know what I wish they'd make - competently - Master and Margarita.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (CwFiP)

84 "66 Ask any sane woman and she will readily admit woman are far more vicious than men."

Ask any man outside of the left wing fever swamps, sane or otherwise, and he won't just admit, he'll loudly proclaim that woman are FAR more vicious than men.

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (k1TUh)

85 79 Get back to me when they make a gender-swap remake of Band Of Brothers ... er Sisters.
Posted by: ShainS at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (IKICP)

Lap-band of Brothers. Starring Rosie O'Donuts and Tubby Riefenstahl.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (mbhDw)

86 It's taught at the same place where several Morons learned that all women are money grubbing serial cheaters, who exist solely to crush their souls and see them ruined in Divorce Court

*********************

Wow, Disney World sure has changed since the last time I visited.

Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (+dsLj)

87 I would love to read something imaginative by
someone who had some insight on how girls would behave in their own made
up society.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (FUu/Z)

They'd probably put up a phony grail light just to capture unsuspecting male travelers. And tickle fights.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (tbOMB)

88 Women are never evil?

I was reading excerpts from a true crime book on Google a few months ago and there was a quick mention of Patty Bolin offing her family in Ohio back in the 1970s so I looked for more information. Not a lot out there but I was able to put the pieces together. She was an alcoholic whose husband was fooling around on her so she shot him and all of her kids except one. That kid was able to run away after her mother pointed the gun at her and pulled the trigger multiple times before realizing the gun was empty. She told her kid to go to her room while she was reloading. The daughter dove out the window and ran off to the neighbors. Patty blew her head off when the cops showed up.

Women can't be evil.

After that I found a site where they collected stories about women killing their families over the years and let's just say it's a thing for sure.

Women can't be evil.

A few days ago a lady in Chicago killed her twin kids and then blew her brains out. Classic murder suicide situation. Her husband found the mess when he came home after a trip out of town.

Women can't be evil.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (4ErVI)

89 To paraphrase Madeline Albright, those who think the world would be a peaceful place if only women ruled the planet, don't remember girls in high school.

Posted by: Elmer Stoup at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (o6qCS)

90 Can you imagine what the lavatory would look like in a tribe full of bitchy aggressive women?

Lord of the Flies, indeed!

Posted by: Fritz at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (eLttb)

91
You'd think these dames would be happy with "Kansas City Bomber."

(I know I was!)

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (mbhDw)

92 So why do two women inevitably end up breaking up over who takes the trash out?

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (EgwCt)

-

You know, now that you mention it, I read recently that there is a shockingly disproportionate amount of domestic violence among lesbian couples. Lord of the Flies level abuse.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Bama's Boot Stomping on the Face of College Football - Forever at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (rjrh3)

93 All Female Zardoz.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (oVJmc)

94 Shouldn't they have to rename it "Lady of the Flies" if there are no boys? Or maybe they can throw in one lucky boy and call it "Lord of the Sammiches"

Posted by: mugiwara at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (I7hGG)

95 *crash*

*smash*

Shrieeeek! You assholes!

Oh what a world what a world....

Posted by: Hillary Campaign HQ, Evening of Nov. 8, 2016 at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (XA79P)

96 88 Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (4ErVI)

Women can't be evil? Look up Ilse Koch.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (mbhDw)

97 'freaked - Did you just get up?'

No it's just that this is so supremely stupid that it surpasses all of the other incredibly stupid stupidity I have witnessed today.

Posted by: freaked at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (BO/km)

98 Just as long as Paul Feig directs.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (oVJmc)

99 Slippery Slope - Where are you?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:19 PM (w1zJX)

Chester County, Pa.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (EgwCt)

100 93 All Female Zardoz.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:22 PM (oVJmc)

Role reversal: Connery plays the anorexic waif.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (mbhDw)

101 If we can control the climate of the entire planet why can't we turn one silly hurricane out to sea?
Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (3myMJ)

Because of white privilege and the patriarchy, that's why.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (mknWS)

102
Roger Corman had the right idea about pretending how great women can be.

Strippuhs On Mars!

Amazons To The Moon...and Back!

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (ApM8l)

103 Women are by far cattier and nastier than men.

Heathers, anyone?

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 Gigawatt SanityProd (tm) at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (/o9Qk)

104 Maybe a live action Groo the Wanderer...

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (CwFiP)

105 101 If we can control the climate of the entire planet why can't we turn one silly hurricane out to sea?
Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (3myMJ)

Because of white privilege and the patriarchy, that's why.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (mknWS)

We use them to target minorities, remember?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (oVJmc)

106 Has she ever seen those women prison movies? Some bad stuff goes down.

There is no way to know how the girls would behave. But they have the same ability to be feral. I've heard the argument that women would wield power more effectively then men, and there would be less war. I don't buy that. Not even a little.

The genders are different, and the hormones, etc. But even within genders there are vast differences in hormone levels & behaviors. I'm so sick of this identity politics crap.

Posted by: Gorilla Gumdrop at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (9KR27)

107 105 101 If we can control the climate of the entire planet why can't we turn one silly hurricane out to sea?
Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:20 PM (3myMJ)

Because of white privilege and the patriarchy, that's why.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:23 PM (mknWS)

We use them to target minorities, remember?
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (oVJmc)

Fuckin' Jooz again....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (mbhDw)

108 Michael Moore auditioned for Lord of the Fries.

Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (mcI77)

109 What am I, chopped liver?

Posted by: Lizzie Bordwn at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (OBaNY)

110 Its all fun and games till menses syncs up, then its the Boleshivick revolution on steroids.

Posted by: Cu'Chulainn at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (vmsda)

111 If there are no dudes on this island, who will eat all the sammiches?

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (tbOMB)

112 108 Michael Moore auditioned for Lord of the Fries.
Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:24 PM (mcI77)

That's LARD on the Fries.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (mbhDw)

113 wouldn't it be paradise island for 28 out of 31 days?

and everyone dead by day 31

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (vChNs)

114 'Get back to me when they make a gender-swap remake of Band Of Brothers ... er Sisters.'

The Blues Sisters. 'Cept there's no nuns.

Posted by: freaked at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (BO/km)

115 Oh gawd, I just realized if they would cast Lena Dunham as "Piggy" and have everyone call her "Piggy" constantly and then throw her off a cliff where her head splats open like a watermelon - this would be the BESTEST BESTEST movie of all time!!!!

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (k1TUh)

116 Most women HATE most other women.

Women are not brought up to be team-oriented.

Think bullying is bad amongst boys/men?

Multiply that by 100 for women.

Posted by: wyntre at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (tTy1z)

117 106 Has she ever seen those women prison movies? Some bad stuff goes down.

Or the tire iron Russian girls.

Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (mcI77)

118 OMG,

Monica is wearing the Exact same grass skirt you are. That BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (vChNs)

119 Trying to find the story about the Chicago mom who killed her kids and welp there's two more women who killed their kids in the last day:

http://nypost.com/2017/09/05/elderly-mom-kills-daughters-in-double-murder-suicide/

http://www.kare11.com/news/local/mom-boy-found-dead-in-orono-ruled-a-murder-suicide/470993873

The Chicago incident:

http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2017/08/28/women-children-joliet-murder-suicide/

Women can't be evil.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (4ErVI)

120
I want Comey's rotting skull on a stick at the beach!

Posted by: Hillary Campaign HQ, Evening of Nov. 8, 2016 at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (XA79P)

121 Did Ace just invent the word imagineer? He should trademark it if he did.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (0wem/)

122 115 Oh gawd, I just realized if they would cast Lena Dunham as "Piggy" and have everyone call her "Piggy" constantly and then throw her off a cliff where her head splats open like a watermelon - this would be the BESTEST BESTEST movie of all time!!!!
Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (k1TUh)

Gallagher schtups her with a giant mallet.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (mbhDw)

123 OK, so we were off a little bit.

-Zager and Evans

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (3myMJ)

124 Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (w1zJX)

Do you mean me or the lovely Tami?
------------

You. Yeah, I botched 'Tammy'.

I was awaiting your comments regarding the Thread link to 'Feel Good Story'. I expected comments re J.J. Watts biceps. Link, totally SFW, and it's a preview:
http://preview.tinyurl.com/yb8ffst5

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (w1zJX)

125 109 What am I, chopped liver?
Posted by: Lizzie Bordwn at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (OBaNY)

Yes. Yes you are.

Posted by: Elizabeth Bathory at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (+azJs)

126 121 Did Ace just invent the word imagineer? He should trademark it if he did.
Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (0wem/)

The Disney people did like 40 years ago.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (mbhDw)

127 You know, now that you mention it, I read recently that there is a shockingly disproportionate amount of domestic violence among lesbian couples. Lord of the Flies level abuse.
Posted by: Moron Robbie - Bama's Boot Stomping on the Face of College Football - Forever at September 05, 2017 06:21 PM (rjrh3)

Isn't it kind of just one of those little injustices in life that women can be a bit slappy in a relationship in get a pass? I mean, if your chick slaps you, you had it coming. If she lobs an ashtray at your heads, that's what you get for calling her fat.

Course, a guy does that that's gonna get him time in the klink. Not that this is a problem, just saying it's a fact of life.

Now a lesbian isn't some special breed of woman, just a lady what likes eatin' pussy. So, same shit happens, right? Two women together? Sheeeiiit...

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (mknWS)

128 I do not agree that most women hate other women. That is a gross exaggeration, IMO and my experience.

Posted by: Gorilla Gumdrop at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (9KR27)

129
Wasn't it shown that the legend of the Tuskegee Airmen doens't pass muster?

Maybe the Left can fabricate a division of Women who did great things in dubya-dubya-too.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (ApM8l)

130 and everyone dead by day 31

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (vChNs)

Lesbo1: Does this banana leaf make my butt look big?Lesbo2: Honey! It ain't the banana leaf.
Lesbo1: It's on, bitch!

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (tbOMB)

131 "Or maybe they can throw in one lucky boy and call it "Lord of the Sammiches"

No, that would turn into "Lord of the ViJayJay's" and I suspect the SJW's wouldn't like that one very much either. At least not publicly.

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (k1TUh)

132 All I want to know - will there be boobehs?

Posted by: RI Red at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (W3zy0)

133 Gender-Swapped "Lord of the Flies" Remake Draws, Get This, Outrage from SJWs, Because Apparently Women Aren't Capable of Cruelty or Tribalism

Apparently the SJWs have never heard of the women of some of Indian tribes, who used to delight in dreaming up and inflicting the most horrendous and protracted tortures imaginable. (Nice culture, eh?)

And unless I'm very much mistaken, they were ... uh ... into tribalism.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (SRKgf)

134 If they make this movie there will be one male character who gets blamed for it all.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (oVJmc)

135 These people who claim, categorically, that "women wouldn't act like that" probably went *ballistic* over James Damore's memo.

Posted by: Jeff Weimer at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (17QyB)

136 Maybe they should try another remake, this time all girls except for one boy. Call it "Lord of the Poon."

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (398bZ)

137 1. Lord of the Flies had nothing on my Boy Scout camping trips.

2. My Boy Scout camping trips were nothing compared with what junior high school girls did to each other at school between classes.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (0wem/)

138 129
Wasn't it shown that the legend of the Tuskegee Airmen doens't pass muster?

Maybe the Left can fabricate a division of Women who did great things in dubya-dubya-too.
Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (ApM8l)

See "The Night Witches."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (mbhDw)

139 You know what I wish they'd make - competently - Master and Margarita.

===

*nods sympathetically*

Posted by: runner at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (QC/4S)

140 Did Ace just invent the word imagineer? He should trademark it if he did.
Posted by: yankeefifth
-------------

'Imagineering' was coined years ago. Used by those who don't actually have engineering skills.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (w1zJX)

141 128 I do not agree that most women hate other women. That is a gross exaggeration, IMO and my experience.

Posted by: Gorilla Gumdrop at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (9KR27)

Is this something you witnessed by watching what they actually do or did they tell you this?

Because if it's the latter, we need to have a talk.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (4ErVI)

142 You know what?

All the SJWs of the US are invited to fling themselves into a volcano for all I care.

Apologies to the volcano for the poisoning.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is a cranky GF hag, thank you very much. at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (kXoT0)

143 66 Ask any sane woman and she will readily admit woman are far more vicious than men.
Posted by: Paul Ryan at September 05, 2017 06:18 PM (Bek89)
-----------------------------
Paulie, Paulie, you are wrong again.
I am a sane woman and I will not 'admit' any such thing.
I believe both sexes are equally vicious, though they tend to express it in different ways.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (0jtPF)

144
See "The Night Witches."

I am unaware.

Is this a small group of battle-hardened women who did amazing things in the War but no one knows about and they never got any credit because....women?

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (ApM8l)

145 The Bolin murders happened in Upper Arlington, not far from where I grew up.

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (TdMsT)

146 Did Ace just invent the word imagineer? He should trademark it if he did.
Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (0wem/)

Motherfucker...

Posted by: The Collective Walt Disney Imagineers at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (mknWS)

147 Well, what is really interesting is to wonder what would have happened if someone had rejected the female lordettes of the flies movie by saying girls would never do that?

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (0wem/)

148 The Borgias, Elizabeth Bathory

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (oVJmc)

149 >>>Maybe the Left can fabricate a division of Women who did great things in dubya-dubya-too.

Not a division, but Roza Shanina.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (CwFiP)

150 125 109 What am I, chopped liver?
Posted by: Lizzie Bordwn at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (OBaNY)

Yes. Yes you are.
Posted by: Elizabeth Bathory at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (+azJs)

Pffft. What have you done recently?

Posted by: Aileen Wuornos at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (SRKgf)

151 I wanna see a bunch o girls try to kill a pig.

a laugh riot

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (vChNs)

152 Moby Slit

Posted by: Call me Fishsmell at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (BO/km)

153
Of course, the same SJW cockfags screamed about the brutal warmongering of Margaret Thatcher.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (iFZVz)

154 Its almost as if women don't have to face any accountability and consequences for their toxic behaviors and actions.

And certain "men" enable this as a sexual strategy.

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (XFue2)

155 I always thought Lord of the Flies was a very dumb book. It belongs right on the shelf with preachy moralizing books like the incredibly stupid Fahrenheit 451.

Posted by: Max Power at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (q177U)

156 144
See "The Night Witches."

I am unaware.

Is this a small group of battle-hardened women who did amazing things in the War but no one knows about and they never got any credit because....women?
Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:29 PM (ApM8l)

Russky bublichkes who flew old Polikarpov biplanes at night over the Germans and harassed them. With bombs, not with insults.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (mbhDw)

157
Looks like thunderstorm status has been downgraded from, 'YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE' to 'You're all gonna die eventually'.

So I'm back.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (EgwCt)

158 Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (w1zJX)

Oh, honey, I don't need no stiknin' link to comment on JJ Watts biceps. I believe I damn near got banned over that once!

I envy the, uh, Lady of His Fly, and that's all Im gonna say about that!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (yE+j4)

159 Lassies of the Flies?

Posted by: Zombie Marcel Marceau at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (LilNs)

160 Dinner options - leftover hamburger or a tomato sammich.

Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (Sfs6o)

161 If they make this movie there will be one male character who gets blamed for it all.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (oVJmc)

The pilot that crashed on the island.

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (mknWS)

162 There would be two minutes of love and happy happy that would quickly degenerate into screaming matches, backhanded snarky comments and passive-aggressive attempts at physical harm. Then, the killing would start.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 Gigawatt SanityProd (tm) at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (/o9Qk)

163 See, if it's all female then the pilot is female. And she'd stop to ask directions so they'd never crash.

besides planes don't have Reverse...

Posted by: SJW at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (vChNs)

164 'Imagineering' was coined years ago. Used by those who don't actually have engineering skills.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September

oh. well it is a great word and well used by Ace here.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (0wem/)

165 150 125 109 What am I, chopped liver?
Posted by: Lizzie Bordwn at September 05, 2017 06:25 PM (OBaNY)

Yes. Yes you are.
Posted by: Elizabeth Bathory at September 05, 2017 06:27 PM (+azJs)

Pffft. What have you done recently?
Posted by: Aileen Wuornos at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (SRKgf)

Seven? Seven? That's not even enough to keep my hands young.

Posted by: Elizabeth Bathory at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (+azJs)

166 That damn Marcel Marceau.

Posted by: Glenn John at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (LilNs)

167 Possible future feel good story.

Hurricane Irma: Richard Branson refuses to leave Necker Island as Irma threatens to strike

Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (mcI77)

168 160 Dinner options - leftover hamburger or a tomato sammich.
Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (Sfs6o)

Pro Tip: Combine them.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (mbhDw)

169 When you walk through a parking lot, men will stop and wave you across. Women lock their eyes forward, pretend they don't see you and keep driving.

Every time.

Stone killers I tells ya. Ask Insomniac.

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (3myMJ)

170 They were going to call it "Lady of the Flies"--but Hillary demanded trademark infringement payments.

Posted by: The Gipper Lives at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (Ndje9)

171 167 Possible future feel good story.

Hurricane Irma: Richard Branson refuses to leave Necker Island as Irma threatens to strike
Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (mcI77)

Oh please oh please oh please....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (mbhDw)

172 We already have a god damn historical record of what a bunch of young girls are capable of; it's called the Salem Witch Trials.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (yE+j4)

173 Will half of them still have rape fantasies on an island with no men?

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (XFue2)

174 Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (mbhDw)
-------
Next you'll be suggesting cheese!

Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (Sfs6o)

175 I wanna see a bunch o girls try to kill a pig.

a laugh riot
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (vChNs)

*Chicks sitting 'round the pig talking about their nails, pig commits suicide*

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (mknWS)

176 Pro Tip: Combine them.

===

*our cookbook editor...*

Posted by: runner at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (QC/4S)

177 If women are "totally peaceful," then why are we allowing them into combat roles in the armed forces?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (wYseH)

178 One fucking spider in the lodge would bring this whole production to a halt.

Posted by: Fritz at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (eLttb)

179 118 OMG,

Monica is wearing the Exact same grass skirt you are. That BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (vChNs)

It's my design, you whore!
*scratches Mandy's eyes out*

Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (0mRoj)

180 173 Will half of them still have rape fantasies on an island with no men?

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (XFue2)

Maybe there's a gorilla somewhere.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (mbhDw)

181 48 Hey, if you're going to make an all female remake of anything...is it called a "period piece?" Or is that something else?
Posted by: Inappropirate Guy at September 05, 2017 06:17 PM (6oxFW)

Beautiful. I'm using that.

But they have half a point. Women would go to pieces differently. They don't fight in quite the same ways we do. Nastier, as my wife points out, but different. E.g., there is a difference between their cliques and our teams or gangs.

Posted by: George LeS at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (+TcCF)

182 These people who claim, categorically, that "women wouldn't act like that" probably went *ballistic* over James Damore's memo.
Posted by: Jeff Weimer at September 05, 2017 06:28 PM (17QyB)

How many times have we heard women express a desire to cut some guy's balls off in a brutal fashion? I bet some of the commentary on Damore's memo ran to that, but if not, ask them their view of rapists or child molesters.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (SRKgf)

183 Messalina, Livia

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (oVJmc)

184 Insomniac's ex-wife and my ex-wives just e-mailed from that island that Leo DiCaprio visited in the movie The Beach.

They said they had to kill a bunch of folks to take over the dope growing operation, but no worries.

They also said the human slavery trade was going strong, so they're not worried about money at all.

I guess The Paulo visits somewhat frequently and they are plotting his eventual kidnapping.

Cannibalism didn't come up, but knowing these ladies the way Insomniac and I do, it will only be a matter of time.

Posted by: Sharkman at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (dqdMO)

185 I'm distantly acquainted with two different women (both of them quite attractive physically and personalitywise) who I had taken for completely and exclusively lesbian.

After being introduced to them socially, I later got wind of the screaming matches and sometimes physical fights between them and their various dyke paramours. Not nice stuff.

After a few years, one of them had married a man. Still is married to him. The other one had shifted to dating a string of men. (She has since married a woman.)

I got the impression in both cases that their shift away from lesbian relationships, temporary or permanent as the case might be, was that neither one of them could put up with the endless sapphic psychodrama from lesbians any longer, and straight men were simply proving easier to get along with.

Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (ujwCG)

186

Hasn't that stupid tv show Survivor shown that women are terrible at everything?

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (ApM8l)

187 Anyone who thinks women can't turn into vicious monsters at the drop of a hat has never stood between a woman who's been on a strict diet for 2 weeks and a donut with her name on it.

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (k1TUh)

188 So, will the feminists still object to the lordettes of the flies when they read the hardcore lesbian indoctrination scenes?

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (0wem/)

189 Remember - Lord of the Flies was children on an island -not wymenz. Ain't gonna happen -bunch of girls running around in their skivvies.

Posted by: Glenn John at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (LilNs)

190 177 If women are "totally peaceful," then why are we allowing them into combat roles in the armed forces?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (wYseH)

Hey, now that is a very interesting seduction!

- - T.A. Mahoney

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (mbhDw)

191
"Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate each other." - H.L. Mencken

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (OOSOb)

192 Possible future feel good story.

Hurricane Irma: Richard Branson refuses to leave Necker Island as Irma threatens to strike
Posted by: Under Fire at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (mcI77)

What, is he planning to wait until the urricane hits directly before he unzips and rapes the eye hole?

Posted by: Robert at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (mknWS)

193 They should do "The Defiant Ones" with like Lena Dunham and that big black chick from Lady Ghostbusters.

Posted by: tu3031 at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (O5Q3r)

194 Sugar and spice, and everything nice!

Posted by: What little girls are made of at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (DsfP1)

195 Seriously, do young women wake up one morning and suddenly discover toxic masculinity as a part of being WOKE?

They have to be getting taught this shit somewhere, and I doubt it's coming from the parents.
Posted by: Gaylord Farkemall at September 05, 2017 06:13 PM (+dsLj)

Hmmm, I think it's cause they WOKE up and realized

They weigh 300 lbs, have chewed off black fingernails with infected cuticles, armpit and leg hair longer than the hair on their head, which is dyed dead black, pink, purple, and green and the very best they can hope for out of life is a one sided relationship with a beta male from the bottom of the beta male barrel.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is a cranky GF hag, thank you very much. at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (kXoT0)

196 Hahahahasororityhahahahahaha

Posted by: Simplemind at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (ZuGkg)

197 Fists of Fury

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (0wem/)

198 177 If women are "totally peaceful," then why are we allowing them into combat roles in the armed forces?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (wYseH)

Now THERE'S a good point.

If you want to belie the "totally peaceful" nonsense, tell them that you think their children aren't too bright.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (SRKgf)

199 Oh, you said "tribalism."

Never mind, then.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (398bZ)

200 194 Sugar and spice, and everything nice!
Posted by: What little girls are made of at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (DsfP1)

Snark, rage and tears.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (mbhDw)

201 Of Mice and Women

Posted by: eeek! at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (BO/km)

202
AtC does the ultimate 'mean girl' impression. I can only paraphrase - 'look at her, eating that cracker like she owns the place'.

My recall does no justice to the original.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (EgwCt)

203 162 There would be two minutes of love and happy happy that would quickly degenerate into screaming matches, backhanded snarky comments and passive-aggressive attempts at physical harm. Then, the killing would start.
Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 Gigawatt SanityProd (tm) at September 05, 2017 06:32 PM (/o9Qk)

Debra would slip foxglove into Muffy's coconut water, and Veronica would shove Cyndi off a cliff.

Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (0mRoj)

204 Hmmm, I think it's cause they WOKE up and realized

They weigh 300 lbs, have chewed off black fingernails with infected cuticles, armpit and leg hair longer than the hair on their head, which is dyed dead black, pink, purple, and green and the very best they can hope for out of life is a one sided relationship with a beta male from the bottom of the beta male barrel.
Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is a cranky GF hag, thank you very much. at September 05, 2017 06:35 PM (kXoT0)

You left out the cats.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (SRKgf)

205 177 If women are "totally peaceful," then why are we allowing them into combat roles in the armed forces?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (wYseH)

It's an experiment to see just how fast a woman can get pregnant when war breaks out.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:36 PM (+azJs)

206 I wanna see a bunch o girls try to kill a ~~pig~~ spider.

a laugh riot
Posted by: Buzzsaw90

Edited

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (w1zJX)

207
Today's Young Women are the "It's Not Me, It's Men" generation.

This is how they cope with their relationship dysfunctionality. They realize that MEN have something INHERENTLY WRONG with them.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (ApM8l)

208 Yeah, nothing in the Greek myths pointing to violent women.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (0wem/)

209 One fucking spider in the lodge would bring this whole production to a halt.

Posted by: Fritz at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (eLttb)

That, plus synchronized periods.

They'd probably all starve to death after a week.

Posted by: Sharkman at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (dqdMO)

210 186

Hasn't that stupid tv show Survivor shown that women are terrible at everything?
Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (ApM8l)

Nah, but it has definitely proven that the flaming queen gay guys are nasty little shits forcing drama every chance they get and they cry and quit once no one wants to put up with their shit any longer.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (z/Ubi)

211 "Based On a True Story".

Sincerely,

Posted by: Evergreen College at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (Ndje9)

212 189 Remember - Lord of the Flies was children on an island -not wymenz. Ain't gonna happen -bunch of girls running around in their skivvies.
Posted by: Glenn John at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (LilNs)

Well, there goes the last chance of a box office hit.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (SRKgf)

213 In my 29 years of life, I can say that I have never experienced more cruelty then experienced by the women in my life.

Posted by: spypeach at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (ZuTnR)

214 Fritz: "One fucking spider in the lodge would bring this whole production to a halt."

Of course it would 'cause that would mean a whole lot more spiders are on their way.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (H8S+R)

215
Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (ujwCG)

They decided to start shopping for straight men and you never introduced them to the Horde?

You asshole.

Posted by: Robert - Sarc tag. SARC TAG! at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (mknWS)

216 who the FUCK left the seat up???

Posted by: Amanda at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (vChNs)

217 Hey, who's up for some grrrl Roller Derby?

It's so cute the way they help each other around the track.

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (3myMJ)

218 Will get really ugly on the island if there are any ghosts that need busting.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (0wem/)

219 I was gonna write something serious and insightful, but even I don't want to hear it. You guys are being too funny.

Carry on please.

Posted by: Gorilla Gumdrop at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (9KR27)

220 Proud to say I called this as soon as people first mentioned it here.

i) If a script has an all male cast, feminists will zero in on it as sexist, and seek to revise it.

ii) Feminists regard the events of a story as *necessarily* reflecting views about the positive or negative qualities of the genders of the characters in those stories.

So what about a story with an all male cast that reflects badly on humanity?

Because it is all male, it must be retconned with an all female cast. But if the message is that humans are evil, if the cast is all female, feminists must interpret this as being that all females are evil (by ii). So this was a tar baby. Saw it from day one.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (/qEW2)

221
99.9% of dykes are dykes for one or two reasons:

1. They are dysfunctional in relationships with men (the man/men they want, that is), so they give up.

2. Daddy issues.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:38 PM (ApM8l)

222 210 186

Hasn't that stupid tv show Survivor shown that women are terrible at everything?
Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (ApM8l)

Nah, but it has definitely proven that the flaming queen gay guys are nasty little shits forcing drama every chance they get and they cry and quit once no one wants to put up with their shit any longer.
Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (z/Ubi)

Except for the gay guy in the first season who won and then lost our number.

Posted by: The IRS at September 05, 2017 06:39 PM (+azJs)

223 121 Did Ace just invent the word imagineer? He should trademark it if he did.
Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (0wem/)

The Walt Disney Company calls its people who (re)design and (re)construct amusement park rides "Imagineers". True story.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at September 05, 2017 06:39 PM (ujg0T)

224 Let me put it this way: anyone who sat through a recent ONT which I need not detail will realize the fatuousness of this criticism.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 06:39 PM (OOSOb)

225 pffft. They couldn't even put together a coconut phone let alone sustain themselves.

Posted by: The Professor at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (mcI77)

226 When I did Dallas was I wrong to do just the men?

Posted by: Debbie at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (OBaNY)

227 The Walt Disney Company calls its people who (re)design and (re)construct amusement park rides "Imagineers". True story.
Posted by: Curmudgeon at September

Thanks

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (0wem/)

228 145 The Bolin murders happened in Upper Arlington, not far from where I grew up.

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at September 05, 2017 06:30 PM (TdMsT)

Yes they did. Did you know any of the kids? Did you ever hear anything about what happened?

I found a Topix board discussion about it from many locals who lived in the area when it happened and a family member showed up and said the story in the family is that her husband was cheating on her. Also she planned it because she bought the gun a few months before the murders.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (4ErVI)

229
I give you, Lady Macbeth.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (mbhDw)

230 Aw shucks, late to the party.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (ujg0T)

231 Wow...women are peaceful? I live with a woman (because we're like married and stuff), and I see all of the backbiting that can go on.

I remember a friend's girlfriend as we were sitting in a restaurant. She said 'I hate that bitch I hope she doesn't come over here' (said bitch was a waitress). She was completely serious. Said 'Bitch' comes over and she says 'HI! How are you?' very convincingly. My buddy and I could just laugh about it, but I realized it revealed the easy duplicity women are capable of.

It's a lesson I have always kept close to me.

Lord of the Flies would be LOT worse with women, because women would emotionally wreck you before you finally drowned your children and killed yourself.

Posted by: blindside1973 at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (0z/gq)

232 The Paulo will not be visiting

Posted by: The Paulo at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (vChNs)

233 This is the most stupidist thing I have heard all day.
Posted by: freaked at September 05, 2017 06:15 PM (BO/km)

Just wait til tomorrow.

Posted by: Country Boy - official AmbASSador to the CenTexMoMee at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (W/Si3)

234 "They decided to start shopping for straight men and you never introduced them to the Horde? You asshole."

Mea maxima culpa.

They are both socially very leftist. So perhaps not the best fit.

Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (ujwCG)

235 226 When I did Dallas was I wrong to do just the men?
Posted by: Debbie at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (OBaNY)

Umm.... You didn't IIRC.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:41 PM (mbhDw)

236 116 Most women HATE most other women.

Women are not brought up to be team-oriented.

Think bullying is bad amongst boys/men?

Multiply that by 100 for women.
Posted by: wyntre at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (tTy1z)

That has not been my experience in any way, shape or form, and I'm pretty old.

I started carrying a gun decades ago, before it was legal, because of two physical assaults on me by men, and having been followed by two men another time. I've never once in my life been physically assaulted or even threatened by a female.

Posted by: stace at September 05, 2017 06:41 PM (JGVnY)

237 That, plus synchronized periods

I don't think that actually happens, frankly.

Consider two women whose cycles differ slightly in ... uh ... period. (Say 28 and 28.5 days.)

No matter where they start out in phase, eventually they'll come into more or less synchrony for a number of months before they pass back out of phase. No one will notice when they're out of phase, but (unfortunately) everybody may notice when they're in phase.

So I suspect it's a selection bias problem.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:41 PM (SRKgf)

238 Just make Call of Cthulhu and make Cthulhu a giant tentacled vagina. Ta-DA!!

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (RrhD2)

239 179 118 OMG,

Monica is wearing the Exact same grass skirt you are. That BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (vChNs)

It's my design, you whore!
*scratches Mandy's eyes out*
Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (0mRoj)

---

but you needed to use TWICE as much grass fatso

Posted by: Blind Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (vChNs)

240 So, remake of "Castaway" with Meryl Streep talking to a baseball bat.

"LOUISVILLE!!!!!"

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (mbhDw)

241 IICR, Dutch Survivor (or something) separated men and women on two different islands. The men after 8 days or so had a functioning cooperative thriving camp and the women had done nothing and were in chaos.

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (XFue2)

242 Cannibalism didn't come up, but knowing these ladies the way Insomniac and I do, it will only be a matter of time.
Posted by: Sharkman at September 05, 2017 06:34 PM (dqdMO)

Oh it'll happen. They'll spend months setting up the victim making him think everything is fine, then out come the knives.

Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (0mRoj)

243 Except for the gay guy in the first season who won and then lost our number.
Posted by: The IRS at September 05, 2017 06:39 PM (+azJs)

I don't think he was flaming queen gay though. I'm thinking that Colton I think his name was who first appeared on the one where they tried a male vs female tribe, and then appeared on Blood Vs Water. First one he faked an illness to quit when everyone was tired of him. And the second time he just quit when no one wanted to play his games. Hi boyfriend was much more easy going and seemed like the small farm town southern guy that would sit and talk football with the guys and then go comment on the linebackers asses with the women.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:43 PM (z/Ubi)

244 If God's going to send a hurricane up the east coast
why not send it straight up the Potomac

Posted by: gNewt at September 05, 2017 06:43 PM (j8uQ3)

245 I need to Imagineer some more beer in my belly.

Posted by: Max Power at September 05, 2017 06:43 PM (q177U)

246 "Based On a True Story".

Sincerely,

Posted by: Evergreen College at September 05, 2017 06:37 PM (Ndje9)
Now you're talking!

Posted by: Bat Wielding Lesbians of Evergreen State College at September 05, 2017 06:43 PM (O5Q3r)

247 244 If God's going to send a hurricane up the east coast
why not send it straight up the Potomac
Posted by: gNewt at September 05, 2017 06:43 PM (j8uQ3)

I'm down for that schtruggle.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:44 PM (mbhDw)

248 this is my surprised face: according to the NY Post, the NSA has Shrillery's missing e-mails, but Straight Arrow Comey turned them down.

nypost.com/2017/09/04/proof-that-investigating-
trump-is-starting-to-backfire-for-democrats/

Posted by: redc1c4 at September 05, 2017 06:44 PM (HbNSs)

249 238 Just make Call of Cthulhu and make Cthulhu a giant tentacled vagina. Ta-DA!!
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (RrhD2)

Wasn't that the Sarlacc in "Return Of The Jedi"?

Posted by: Curmudgeon at September 05, 2017 06:44 PM (ujg0T)

250 stace: "That has not been my experience in any way, shape or form, and I'm pretty old."

Twenty-nine isn't pretty old. Don't let anyone tell you different.

Posted by: Lord of the Memes at September 05, 2017 06:44 PM (H8S+R)

251 They are both socially very leftist. So perhaps not the best fit.

Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (ujwCG)

Have we taught you nothing?

Ball gags and bourbon.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:44 PM (wYseH)

252 Jiang Qing !

Posted by: runner at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (QC/4S)

253 "I live with a woman (because we're like married and stuff), and I see all of the backbiting that can go on."

The thing that's amazing to me is how women in a mixed social setting can be looking daggers at one another and trading subtly coded barbed insults, and how hard it often is for ordinary happy-go-lucky guys to even realize that all this vicious intrafeminine interplay is even happening.

It's as though there's a particular dimension of social interaction that a Y chromosome will block a man from being able to clearly perceive. Worse yet for males who are a bit Aspie.

Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (ujwCG)

254
Old and busted - Gilligan's Island
New hotness - Giggling Island

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (mbhDw)

255 239 179 118 OMG,

Monica is wearing the Exact same grass skirt you are. That BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (vChNs)

It's my design, you whore!
*scratches Mandy's eyes out*
Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (0mRoj)

---

but you needed to use TWICE as much grass fatso
Posted by: Blind Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (vChNs)

Oh, that's IT!!!

*grabs Mandy's hair*
*cvnt punts Mandy*

Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (0mRoj)

256 they seem to know that many women just do not get along, but want to imagineer a new reality into existence by claiming the world is other than it is.

All Men are created equal.
Sexual identity is just a social construct.
Communism can work.
Men and Women are the same.
Racism and sexism are the root of all evil.
Islam is Peaceful, but Christianity if full of Crusaders.
CO2 causes global warmering.
AntiFa is peaceful.. Trump supporters are Nazis.

The truly believe that 'perception is reality'... and if they can get you to lie to yourself, that subjective reality won't BITCH SLAP you.... and them...

We are in the middle of the greatest Con job ever... we are being gaslighted like no other time in history...

Posted by: Don Quixote channeling Cassandra at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (NgKpN)

257

Hear about that sicko who murdered his wife and claimed he blacked out on cough medicine? Studying to be a pastor.

I'll bet my left nut he was a "youth pastor."

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (ApM8l)

258 Women in an office treat other women far worse than any man ever would.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (0wem/)

259 I liked the one where she claimed she fell out of her freaking chair while sitting in it. Nobody saw her. She got months of workers comp for that . Then she up and quit.

Posted by: torabora at September 05, 2017 06:46 PM (OBaNY)

260 OK, so I was wrong about Mos Eisley

Posted by: Ben Kenobi at September 05, 2017 06:46 PM (vChNs)

261 257

Hear about that sicko who murdered his wife and claimed he blacked out on cough medicine? Studying to be a pastor.

I'll bet my left nut he was a "youth pastor."
Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (ApM8l)

Michael Vick's Formula .44 magnum?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:46 PM (mbhDw)

262 Jiggling Island

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 06:46 PM (0wem/)

263 Six Merry Murderess of Cook County Jail !

Posted by: runner at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (QC/4S)

264 237 That, plus synchronized periods

I don't think that actually happens, frankly.

Consider two women whose cycles differ slightly in ... uh ... period. (Say 28 and 28.5 days.)

No matter where they start out in phase, eventually they'll come into more or less synchrony for a number of months before they pass back out of phase. No one will notice when they're out of phase, but (unfortunately) everybody may notice when they're in phase.

So I suspect it's a selection bias problem.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:41 PM (SRKgf)

Yeah, it's a myth. Apparently one that was too good to verify for decades.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (+azJs)

265 Stereotypes are there for a reason, folks. Embrace them.

Posted by: Strobe at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (gbWkA)

266 "I started carrying a gun decades ago, before it was
legal..."

Posted by: stace at September 05, 2017 06:41 PM (JGVnY)

Pretty fvcking liberating I'll bet.

THIS, ladies and gentlemen, is a real feminist.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (wYseH)

267 You want to experience mean women?

Get a few female vocalists together at a jam session.

Then listen to each of them talk about it later.

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (mDmux)

268 Then there was the female electrician's mate who made the lesser ranked guys carry her fucking tool bag.

Posted by: torabora at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (OBaNY)

269 254. Said before, will repeat.

All schoolgirl cast - Japanese waifus compelling interned British & American exchange students to build a footbridge across the lily pond.
Bridge on the River Kawaii.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (fA1SL)

270 The hatred black women have for a white woman dating a black guy is positively incandescent.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (OOSOb)

271 Zardoz !

Posted by: The Jackhole Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (M+Lyo)

272 260 OK, so I was wrong about Mos Eisley
Posted by: Ben Kenobi at September 05, 2017 06:46 PM (vChNs)

I knew a rabbi named Mos Eisley. Or was it Moishe Eisenberg. Close enough.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (mbhDw)

273 267 You want to experience mean women?

Get a few female vocalists together at a jam session.

Then listen to each of them talk about it later.
Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (mDmux)

"Oh Sandy, honey, you used to be so good at hitting those higher notes!"

Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (0mRoj)

274
Some women are great people. Why can't that be enough?

Why do we need to PRETEND that women are great inventors, and great scientists, and great business minds, and great warriors?

Because the Left says so, that's why.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (ApM8l)

275 168 160 Dinner options - leftover hamburger or a tomato sammich.
Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 06:31 PM (Sfs6o)

Pro Tip: Combine them.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton

With yogurt! For a smoothie!

Posted by: Your Kitchen Blender at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (7Ml7x)

276 The link of the heading is exactly as I suspected.

Posted by: Skip at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (pPKG5)

277 Women aren't petty? Women can't be evil?

I present to you as evidence...the last five years of my marriage.

I also grew up with three younger sisters. They fought with each other much, much more than I ever fought with them, and they were VICIOUS.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (rJUlF)

278 stace: "That has not been my experience in any way, shape or form, and I'm pretty old."

We're not talking about criminal assaults, but rather about social interaction.

And in a management position, ALL of my personnel hassles involved women at each other's throats, typically over nothing. Two in particular fought like cats and dogs, and first one, then the other, would come to my office blubbing about the most recent set-to.

My secretary used to joke that I needed a couch in my office. And waterproof carpet.

The worst part was having feign interest in the whole squabble, as though I had nothing else to do.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (SRKgf)

279 murderesses ? yeah, that's better

Posted by: runner at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (QC/4S)

280 Yeah, it's a myth. Apparently one that was too good to verify for decades.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (+azJs)

To be fair, would YOU want to be the one doing that research?

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (z/Ubi)

281 270 The hatred black women have for a white woman dating a black guy is positively incandescent.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (OOSOb)

Remember that video from just before the election? Fast food restaurant? Some BLM-looking douchebag accosted a black guy because he was having a burger with his white girlfriend. Didn't back down, as I recall either.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:50 PM (mbhDw)

282 Mos Eisley...

Either a rapper or the guy who played the guy who flew the helicopter on Magnum P.I.?

It's one of those two.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:50 PM (4ErVI)

283 "Have we taught you nothing? Ball gags and bourbon."

Let's just say that it's worthy of some extended hours in the bunk to reflect upon that opportunity, were it ever to present itself. With either of the two. Or both.

Posted by: torquewrench at September 05, 2017 06:50 PM (ujwCG)

284

Heh. I was just checking Celery Deaths at wiki and I see that Irish news presenter DON COCKBURN has passed.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:50 PM (ApM8l)

285
I liked the one where she claimed she fell out of her freaking chair
while sitting in it. Nobody saw her. She got months of workers comp for
that . Then she up and quit.

My brother the firefighter says there's on the fire department who did her year probation then on like day 366 "fell down the stairs at the firehouse". No witnesses. She's been out two years. So far.

Posted by: tu3031 at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (O5Q3r)

286
Speaking of nasty women....

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (ApM8l)

287 It's clear this woman has never worked for a woman.

I have and my sex is vicious in the workplace. I never want to work for a female boss again.

Posted by: mpfs, Not My Circus..Not My Monkeys at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (79p/O)

288 They fought with each other much, much more than I ever fought with them

I'm just gonna go ahead and assume you did not wear their clothes without asking, use their makeup, or try and steal their boyfriends, so..... apples and oranges?

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (yE+j4)

289 Wait, these are the same cvnts who simultaneously state there are no difference between men and women AND women are inherently more virtuous and moral than men?

Alrighty then.

Posted by: Butch at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (hXu8T)

290 I also grew up with three younger sisters. They fought with each other much, much more than I ever fought with them, and they were VICIOUS.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (rJUlF)

Seriously it's like these bitches never watched a SHE STOLE MUH BABBBYYY! move on Lifetime or saw that movie with Glenn Close and the rabbit.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (4ErVI)

291 Women do Fat-Shaming just fine.

Posted by: Piggy at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (RMA4e)

292 She was completely serious. Said 'Bitch' comes over and she says 'HI! How are you?' very convincingly. My buddy and I could just laugh about it, but I realized it revealed the easy duplicity women are capable of.

Posted by: blindside1973 at September 05, 2017 06:40 PM (0z/gq)

Not me, if I am not forced to be nice to some gal who has earned my hatred--like the gal who didn't want me having lunch with a certain group who one day started screaming at me, "To just shut the f*ck up, no one wants to hear your voice." I refused to ever be in the same room with her again--until another friend's wedding reception and here comes Ann to stand by me and the late fiance. See Ann is a big old wh@re who thinks every man in American needs to know her and her vagina personally. He was a gentleman, so he popped up from his seat, waiting to be introduced to the BOW, which did not happen. She flounced off. He sat back down and said, "What just happened? You have such beautiful manners and I thought you were going to kill her with that look." I sweetly replied, "She only gets to tell me to shut the f#ck up one time and she's had that time. Other than that, I refuse to ruin A & W's reception."

No, I will not introduce you to Ann, she has ruined too many guys already.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is a cranky GF hag, thank you very much. at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (kXoT0)

293 255 239 179 118 OMG,

Monica is wearing the Exact same grass skirt you are. That BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:26 PM (vChNs)

It's my design, you whore!
*scratches Mandy's eyes out*
Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:33 PM (0mRoj)

---

but you needed to use TWICE as much grass fatso
Posted by: Blind Mandy at September 05, 2017 06:42 PM (vChNs)

Oh, that's IT!!!

*grabs Mandy's hair*
*cvnt punts Mandy*
Posted by: Monica at September 05, 2017 06:45 PM (0mRoj)

---

I am going to get EVERYONE to unfriend you now. No one will ever like one of your tweets again!

Posted by: Ben Kenobi at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (vChNs)

294 238 Just make Call of Cthulhu and make Cthulhu a giant tentacled vagina.

Watchoo talkin' bout? Cthulhu IS a giant tentacled vagina!!!

Posted by: IA! IA! IA! at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (k1TUh)

295 >>Speaking of nasty women....

WHERE'S MY FUCKING SERVICE ANIMAL!!!?

Posted by: garrett at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (RMA4e)

296 My brother the firefighter says there's on the fire department who did her year probation then on like day 366 "fell down the stairs at the firehouse". No witnesses. She's been out two years. So far.

Posted by: tu3031 at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (O5Q3r)

Or the ones who resign one day before their maternity leave ends.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (OOSOb)

297 And in a management position, ALL of my personnel
hassles involved women at each other's throats, typically over nothing.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (SRKgf)

That has been my experience as well, although the best boss I ever had was an out-and-proud lesbian who did not give a fvck about anything other than running a great department and crushing her numbers.

And she had a photo of her smoking hot girlfriend on her desk, so that was nice too....

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (wYseH)

298 294 238 Just make Call of Cthulhu and make Cthulhu a giant tentacled vagina.

Watchoo talkin' bout? Cthulhu IS a giant tentacled vagina!!!
Posted by: IA! IA! IA! at September 05, 2017 06:52 PM (k1TUh)

Gay Jap from Trek, right?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (mbhDw)

299 "my sex is vicious in the workplace"

I think there's a rule around here. Something about pictures.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (398bZ)

300 280 Yeah, it's a myth. Apparently one that was too good to verify for decades.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (+azJs)

To be fair, would YOU want to be the one doing that research?
Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (z/Ubi)

I'd rather French kiss a rattlesnake.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (SRKgf)

301 Oh Sandy, honey, you used to be so good at hitting those higher notes!"
Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:48 PM (0mRoj)

"OMG, and did you see her throat wattle wiggling?"

Posted by: Meremortal at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (mDmux)

302 188 So, will the feminists still object to the lordettes of the flies when they read the hardcore lesbian indoctrination scenes?
Posted by: yankeefifth

There is no other reason to watch this remake except for hardcore lesbian indoctrination scenes.

Posted by: Puddleglum at September 05, 2017 06:53 PM (pY+s4)

303 287 It's clear this woman has never worked for a woman.

I have and my sex is vicious in the workplace. I never want to work for a female boss again.
Posted by: mpfs, Not My Circus..Not My Monkeys at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (79p/O)

Oh lord. And do they hold grudges. Sweet Jeebus do they hold grudges.

Posted by: Insomniac at September 05, 2017 06:54 PM (0mRoj)

304 Unfortunately, the two men met.

(just the punchline)

Posted by: Democritus and Leibniz at September 05, 2017 06:54 PM (QDnY+)

305 >>>I'm just gonna go ahead and assume you did not wear their clothes without asking, use their makeup, or try and steal their boyfriends, so..... apples and oranges?
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (yE+j4)

No...but I did have their Barbie dolls "fling themselves to their death" from the top of the Barbie Penthouse set they had.

I never said I was totally innocent.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at September 05, 2017 06:54 PM (rJUlF)

306
The actresses will still have to suck a dick to get a part.

Posted by: Irony Wrinkles at September 05, 2017 06:54 PM (/zwDg)

307 >>There is no other reason to watch this remake except for hardcore lesbian indoctrination scenes.

I'm looking forward to the female Professor making a Double Ender out of a Coconut.

Posted by: garrett at September 05, 2017 06:55 PM (RMA4e)

308 Where's my casting couch? Let's get this show on the road!

These girls aren't getting any younger!

Posted by: Roman Polanski at September 05, 2017 06:55 PM (eLttb)

309 Female here.

I've worked in jobs that are 95% male, and other jobs that are split 50/50.

Given the choice, I'll work with males.

It's not that I don't like females; it's just that some --not all-- are vicious backstabbers that will smile to your face and pretend they're you're friend.

Generally, men aren't as underhanded-- they'll just tell you to eff off and mean it. There are some men that are backstabbers, but they're the exception, not the rule.

Lord of the Flies with females would be even more bloody and horrible, IMHO.

Posted by: shibumi at September 05, 2017 06:56 PM (aT+Bx)

310 I have and my sex is vicious in the workplace.

---

got any video? We could take up a collection....

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:56 PM (vChNs)

311 So weird. I bet the author of this piece is a fan of Orange is the New Black though.

Posted by: no good deed at September 05, 2017 06:56 PM (eIQHF)

312 And in a management position, ALL of my personnel hassles involved women at each other's throats, typically over nothing. Two in particular fought like cats and dogs, and first one, then the other, would come to my office blubbing about the most recent set-to.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (SRKgf)

I had a similar experience, though it was a bit more serious. Two of my employees wanted the same man. They were both competitive and kinda ruthless.

One of them prevails and marries him.

The other one sleeps with him. It gets out.

The guy was kind of a putz, to be sure, but in any event it was the kind of place where you didn't drink the coffee in case one of them was trying to poison the other and got you by mistake.

It was a government shop, too, and they were both grossly overpaid, so the incentive was to get the other one to quit instead of quitting yourself. All around bad situation.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:57 PM (+azJs)

313 Like I said the other day, they are going to have to add a binging scene to follow the wild boar feast.

...and then, the Spanking!

Posted by: garrett at September 05, 2017 06:57 PM (RMA4e)

314 280 Yeah, it's a myth. Apparently one that was too good to verify for decades.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (+azJs)

To be fair, would YOU want to be the one doing that research?
Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (z/Ubi)

Nope. I'd be lining up for the multiple orgasm study.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (+azJs)

315 They could solve their issue by having a second island close by filled with shipwrecked boys.

And when the boys sneak over on panty raid...

You're welcome, Hollywood!

Posted by: naturalfake at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (NyJwR)

316 I've never seen the workplace issues with the wimmins, but I work in a statistics department and that probably draws an atypical segment of the population.

the rational...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (vChNs)

317 Per Fox News, Congress is in session.

How can you tell?

Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (2wRtc)

318 287 It's clear this woman has never worked for a woman.

I have and my sex is vicious in the workplace. I never want to work for a female boss again.
Posted by: mpfs, Not My Circus..Not My Monkeys at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (79p/O)

My wife says exactly the same thing. She says her female bosses have tried to be hard-driving hard-nosed executives, and then want to be your friend.

When that doesn't work, they complain that male bosses can be dicks, but female bosses are judged by a different standard, little realizing that male bosses who are dicks are totally uninterested in being friends with anybody (or that they're universally hated, and know it, but don't care).

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (SRKgf)

319 I think an all-female Lord of the Flies could be interesting if done right. I'm imagining an island full of Mean Girls psychologically tormenting each other and driving one another to suicide. It has potential.

Posted by: rickl at September 05, 2017 06:59 PM (sdi6R)

320 308 Where's my casting couch? Let's get this show on the road!

These girls aren't getting any younger!
Posted by: Roman Polanski at September 05, 2017 06:55 PM (eLttb)

Flexibility is the key.

Posted by: Josh Whedon at September 05, 2017 06:59 PM (+azJs)

321 President Hillary Clinton would have turned what's left of this country into a smoking , radioactive cinder.

Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at September 05, 2017 06:59 PM (2wRtc)

322 >Speaking of nasty women....

WHERE'S MY FUCKING SERVICE ANIMAL!!!?

It's very unkind to startle me like that.

Posted by: Service Dog #5370701 at September 05, 2017 07:00 PM (3myMJ)

323 And when the boys sneak over on panty raid...

You're welcome, Hollywood!
Posted by: naturalfake at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (NyJwR)

If Hollywood took up your idea they'd have the boys then return to their island to model the stolen panties for each other.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:00 PM (SRKgf)

324
You know what I don't get?

Survivor was a huge success. Mark Burnett must've made hundreds of millions off it.

Then why is his wife, Roma Downey, hawking skin products on tv informercials?

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 07:00 PM (ApM8l)

325 The first day a minority actress sees a banana tree, the project will get abandoned.

Posted by: garrett at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (RMA4e)

326 An all women remake of Lord of the Flies makes no sense because...the plot of the book wouldn't happen with all women

I've just now invented a perpetual motion machine. Hook a feminist up to a generator and as she flips positions between "all men are bad and leftist women are good" and "it's evil to suggest women and men are in any way different" you generate power.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (jhqr1)

327 Yeah pretty simple plot.

Everyone is afraid to go into the jungle so they stay on the beach.

Everyone gets cold so they huddle together.

When everyone is huddled together there are accidental brushes and rubs.

Lesbianism ensues.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (0wem/)

328 I never want to work for a female boss again.
Posted by: mpfs, Not My Circus..Not My Monkeys at September 05, 2017 06:51 PM (79p/O)

That's kind of funny. Where I work it's about 95% men.
I used to have a boss I thought was great. She was good at motivating people, she was fun to be around, she was good at dealing with vendors and other departments.

The women in our group, without exception, hated her.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (+azJs)

329 Of course my wife took a job as a pharmacy tech 20 months ago. 2 pharmacies, 2 female pharmacists.

Did I mention that she has been an ex-pharmacy tech for 8 months now?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (vChNs)

330 314 280 Yeah, it's a myth. Apparently one that was too good to verify for decades.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:47 PM (+azJs)

To be fair, would YOU want to be the one doing that research?
Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 06:49 PM (z/Ubi)

Nope. I'd be lining up for the multiple orgasm study.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (+azJs)

You know you'd get stuck in the control group.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (z/Ubi)

331 Whether or not Hollywood ever makes the movie the porn industry is going to make it over and over.

Posted by: yankeefifth at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (0wem/)

332
oh wait, I'm getting Roma Downey mixed up with the Doctor Quinn chick.

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (ApM8l)

333 My observations over the years are that women and men have trouble being in the same workplace because men do very well with hierarchical command structures, while women want lateral structures with a "leader" in name only. Best example is academia, a female workplace fantasy, and it works best when nothing in reality has to actually get done, except for talking non stop and pretending that we all have a consensus.

Men who desire to actually accomplish things fall naturally into a hierarchy, where the guy on the top calls all the shots and the men under follow his direction, or if they don't like them they find a way to leave. There is no place for dissension or backbiting.

Many women turn out to be horrible leaders in any heirarchy because they sense that they don't really understand how it works or why, and they are desperate not to be looked down on, so they overcompensate and try to make themselves be the biggest assholes in the company.

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (k1TUh)

334 I've just now invented a perpetual motion machine. Hook a feminist up to a generator and as she flips positions between "all men are bad and leftist women are good" and "it's evil to suggest women and men are in any way different" you generate power.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (jhqr1)

How about a device that generates power from a woman talking?

You could get rid of the all the coal plants and the nuke plants.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (4ErVI)

335
Dr Quinn wasn't touching angels, was she?

Posted by: Soothsayer On Ice! at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (ApM8l)

336 I'm old and grumpy and anti-social and pretty much hate everyone equally, so I generally just sit in my office and ignore everybody.

Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (Sfs6o)

337 The guy was kind of a putz, to be sure, but in any event it was the kind of place where you didn't drink the coffee in case one of them was trying to poison the other and got you by mistake.

It was a government shop, too, and they were both grossly overpaid, so the incentive was to get the other one to quit instead of quitting yourself. All around bad situation.
Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 06:57 PM (+azJs)

Yow. It makes my having to put up with hebdomadal crying jags look positively benign.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:03 PM (SRKgf)

338 SJW's basically want a remake of Vivid's ground breaking series Where The Boys Aren't.

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 07:03 PM (XFue2)

339 317 Per Fox News, Congress is in session.

How can you tell?
Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at September 05, 2017 06:58 PM (2wRtc)

My wallet started crying.

Posted by: buzzion at September 05, 2017 07:03 PM (z/Ubi)

340 How about a device that generates power from a woman talking?

You could get rid of the all the coal plants and the nuke plants.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (4ErVI)

Too much CO2.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:03 PM (SRKgf)

341 How about an all female "Beverly Hills Cop"

Just so we can see the 'Banana in the tailpipe' trick...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at September 05, 2017 07:04 PM (vChNs)

342 But are they all, you know, "white" women?
I mean, what would happen if they made a version where all the boys were POCs, who, as everyone knows, never turn to thuggery or any sort of misbehavior, and are only punished disproportionately due to racism?
And really, why were there only white boys on that plane in the original story anyway? Clearly we see institutional bias at work!
There are way too many problematics going on here.

Posted by: Sam at September 05, 2017 07:05 PM (J87Sn)

343 I ain't fallin' for no 'Banana in the Tailpipe'!

Posted by: Hope Solo at September 05, 2017 07:05 PM (RMA4e)

344 334 I've just now invented a perpetual motion machine. Hook a feminist up to a generator and as she flips positions between "all men are bad and leftist women are good" and "it's evil to suggest women and men are in any way different" you generate power.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 05, 2017 07:01 PM (jhqr1)

How about a device that generates power from a woman talking?

You could get rid of the all the coal plants and the nuke plants.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (4ErVI)

How about a generator powered by a treadmill with a pair of shoes suspended just out of reach?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:05 PM (SRKgf)

345 336 I'm old and grumpy and anti-social and pretty much hate everyone equally, so I generally just sit in my office and ignore everybody.
Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (Sfs6o)

What a great job!

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 07:05 PM (+azJs)

346 NOOD

Posted by: Glenn John at September 05, 2017 07:05 PM (LilNs)

347 I'm pretty sure I got this one figured out.
Two mean girls are after the same guy. The girls go off and get shipwrecked and the mean girls form seperate tribes
Bitch bitch bitch fight fight fight
Piggy tries to make peace cuz they're all grrrls together against the world
Piggy gets killed and grrrls learn she was right
Girls get rescued
Two grrs fighting over the one boy kill the boy dressed in their savage island garb cuz sisterhood
FIN

Posted by: naturalfake at September 05, 2017 07:06 PM (NyJwR)

348 Yow. It makes my having to put up with hebdomadal crying jags look positively benign.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:03 PM (SRKgf)

I left that place almost 25 years ago and haven't had a management job since.

Posted by: Ace's liver at September 05, 2017 07:06 PM (+azJs)

349 I'm old and grumpy and anti-social and pretty much hate everyone equally, so I generally just sit in my office and ignore everybody.

Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (Sfs6o)

I'm pretty much the same, though I like my co-workers just fine. But if I'm not talking business I don't have business talking.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (kUG5n)

350 OH NOEZ

The president of the US Hispanic Chamber of Commerce left the President's diversity council!!!

What will we do?

Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (2wRtc)

351 For the M&M fans: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/The_Master_and_Margarita

Posted by: Stumbo at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (DsfP1)

352 I'm old and grumpy and anti-social and pretty much hate everyone equally, so I generally just sit in my office and ignore everybody.
Posted by: Weasel at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (Sfs6o)

Well, you've got an office to hide in so you've got that going for you.

Posted by: Service Dog #5370701 at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (3myMJ)

353 Mortimer: "Per Fox News, Congress is in session.

How can you tell?"

Hot air up 237%? Smug storm escalation? Printing press at Treasury whirring again? Leaking like a levee during Katrina?

There are any number of determinants.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (H8S+R)

354 Funny story. A woman got stuck in a window trying to throw her poo out of her date's bathroom. Had to be rescued.

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-bristol-41167296

Posted by: Widespread Pepe at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (XFue2)

355 driving one another to suicide.

So the fat chick swan dives onto the boar?

That might be funny.

Posted by: DeadSockPosting at September 05, 2017 07:08 PM (FhXTo)

356 All female The Dirty Dozen. They parachute in then covince the Nazis to surrender without a fight.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doppelganger To the Stars! at September 05, 2017 07:08 PM (Nwg0u)

357 333 My observations over the years are that women and men have trouble being in the same workplace because men do very well with hierarchical command structures, while women want lateral structures with a "leader" in name only. Best example is academia, a female workplace fantasy, and it works best when nothing in reality has to actually get done, except for talking non stop and pretending that we all have a consensus.

Men who desire to actually accomplish things fall naturally into a hierarchy, where the guy on the top calls all the shots and the men under follow his direction, or if they don't like them they find a way to leave. There is no place for dissension or backbiting.

Many women turn out to be horrible leaders in any heirarchy because they sense that they don't really understand how it works or why, and they are desperate not to be looked down on, so they overcompensate and try to make themselves be the biggest assholes in the company.
Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 07:02 PM (k1TUh)

Good point. I think this is a driver for why feminists want female participation in sports, which is where boys/men typically learn to sort themselves out into a cohesive, functioning unit.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:08 PM (SRKgf)

358

The scribblings of New York Times columnist Roxane Gay exude a jejune air that had not irked me ... until now.

Rather than discuss her hormonally-afflicted ... spew ..., let me ask just one question:

If, indeed, "... "the plot of the book wouldn't happen with all women," New York Times columnist Roxane Gay declared", ...

... WHY is there a remake?

Posted by: Brutus Jones at September 05, 2017 07:08 PM (FlRtG)

359 My wife never understood why we have trouble when we try to projects together - my attitude is "okay, you be in charge and I'll do what you say, or I be in charge and you do what I say." And she'll say "no, I want to know what you think and what your input on these things". Of course I've been down that road, and no that if I actually come up with anything that even slightly criticizes some nutty idea of hers, then she'll be furious and accuse me of trying to sabotage all of her plans, so this "i want input" really means "I want you to tell me my stupid idea is great, and I want you to mean it."

To me, my position of "you just be in charge, and I'll do it and won't say anything about it" looks pretty damned generous.

Posted by: Tom Servo at September 05, 2017 07:09 PM (k1TUh)

360 350 OH NOEZ

The president of the US Hispanic Chamber of Commerce left the President's diversity council!!!

What will we do?
Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at September 05, 2017 07:07 PM (2wRtc)

Find someone else to mow the White House lawn?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:09 PM (SRKgf)

361 Mortimer: "The president of the US Hispanic Chamber of Commerce left the President's diversity council!!!"

Nothing says "America" and "unity" than a Hispanic CoC. Just ask La Raza.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at September 05, 2017 07:10 PM (H8S+R)

362 356 All female The Dirty Dozen. They parachute in then covince the Nazis to surrender without a fight.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doppelganger To the Stars! at September 05, 2017 07:08 PM (Nwg0u)

Ooh, a movie title thread!

All female "For A Few Dollars More" about a shopping spree

You could have the same movie from the masculine perspective "The Longest Day"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 05, 2017 07:11 PM (SRKgf)

363 331 Whether or not Hollywood ever makes the movie the porn industry is going to make it over and over.

They already have.

I hear.......

Posted by: Puddleglum at September 05, 2017 07:13 PM (pY+s4)

364 "oh wait, I'm getting Roma Downey mixed up with the Doctor Quinn chick."

The Dr. Quinn character was so out of whack she looked like a time traveler in that show.

Posted by: Service Dog #5370701 at September 05, 2017 07:14 PM (3myMJ)

365 The all male version of "Mean Girls"

Posted by: mercenary13 at September 05, 2017 07:14 PM (eEloi)

366 333:Many women turn out to be horrible leaders in any heirarchy because they sense that they don't really understand how it works or why, and they are desperate not to be looked down on, so they overcompensate and try to make themselves be the biggest assholes in the company.
Posted by: Tom Servo

And this too, is the story of Obama.

Posted by: Puddleglum at September 05, 2017 07:14 PM (pY+s4)

367 Posted by: Captain Whitebread at September 05, 2017 06:54 PM (rJUlF)

Complete innocence in a man is vastly overrated!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at September 05, 2017 07:18 PM (yE+j4)

368 They could make it about a plane-load of secretaries and office managers and call it:

"Lord of the Files".

Which, on reflection, is silly, because the "Lord of the Flies" is Beelzebub / Satan.

And Golding was writing more about the rate of descent into ultra-barbarism when "steadying" hands are absent.

Posted by: Bruce at September 05, 2017 07:25 PM (7rlrd)

369
All female The Dirty Dozen. They parachute in then covince the Nazis to surrender without a fight.

Our newest series.
"Band of ~~Brothers~~ Sisters".

It's about a apartment of women versus a spider in the bathtub.

Posted by: HBO at September 05, 2017 07:34 PM (t6XCL)

370 This is rich. I live in a house with a wife and two young daughters; it feels like Lord of the Flies every day around here. I can only hope we're still at war somewhere in the Middle East when my girls are teenagers, because I'm fucking going.

Posted by: UGAdawg at September 05, 2017 07:54 PM (tRd71)

371 I'm pretty sure there's a way to prove/disprove this hypothesis.

Posted by: missbosslady at September 05, 2017 07:59 PM (tRfvJ)

372 Wait, I'm confused. Is there no difference between men and women, or huge differences? It seems like one minute it is one way, the next the opposite. It's almost like I'm being gas lighted here.

Posted by: Dean Wormer at September 05, 2017 08:00 PM (fftfA)

373 Somebody may have mentioned this already, I don't have time to read all the comments right now to this high-larious piece, but the worst fate that could befall a fighter of Native Americans was being turned over to the women. Because they loved to torture and hack off genitals, is the reason. So put that in your peace pipe and smoke it. HALP!!

Posted by: Octopus at September 05, 2017 08:02 PM (TjN6o)

374 If you want to read an actuall classic about shipwrecked ladies who formed an all-female society that had some issues as a result, Poul Anderson's "Virgin Planet" comes to mind.

Basic premise is SciFi, colony ship suffers damage killing all male members of the crew and passengers, survivors have access to cloning tech, but only female children can result, and they are genetic copies of the available survivors, so you have identical ladies who all gravitate to the jobs and personalities that their DNA tends them to.

Then many generations later, a Scout Ship lands, with it's (male) pilot and hijinks ensue.

Almost as much fun as Anderson's other work that I loved the most of all his works, his "The High Crusade".

Posted by: BobM at September 05, 2017 08:50 PM (QUZWO)

375 In this "Lady of the Flies" remake- it will quickly turn into a blood bath, but when the few remaining survivors are rescued, they blame everything that happened on Russian interference.

Posted by: Darth Randall at September 05, 2017 10:20 PM (v3DL/)

376 Apparently Women Aren't Capable of Cruelty or Tribalism

Anyone who believes that never went to High School.

Posted by: katya the designated driver at September 06, 2017 12:57 AM (BHMfA)

377 Late to the party, again, I see. And everyone already went home. What happened to the party all night overnight threads?

Posted by: katya the designated driver at September 06, 2017 01:10 AM (BHMfA)

378 Watch the bachelor, or big brother, or survivor, or reruns of the real world. Women really are horrible. Horrible. Just absolutely horrible. I can't say horrible enough. C*nts really.

Posted by: Anti-feminist at September 06, 2017 05:45 AM (0gAY0)

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