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aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com CBD: cbd.aoshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com | Transgender Paid By Wife to Let Her Husband Have Sex With Xit Now Suing Because Husband Had Heart Attack and Died During Sex, Breaking Xer PenisIt's a lot to take in all at once, I know. That's what xhe said. Instapundit would say: File this under 21st Century Relationships. Please do not be alarmed by the frequent references to "her penis." There's a rational and reassuring explanation for this -- the universe has gone mad and we are all now trapped in a lunatic asylum of infinite size and you are trapped here forever until you agree to voluntarily make yourself insane as well. And then you die.Videos of the "court case" at the link. Now, this happened in some foreign country and was shown on some kind of Spanish language version of The People's Court. The show is called Caso Cerrado, which I believe translates to Ay, We're Makin' All Dis Cheet Up Here, You Get That Ya, Orale? I kind of think this is some made-up crap that the "litigants" here invented to get a all-expenses-included trip to luxurious Venezuela and be paid three beans each, though with inflation, those three beans depreciated by the end of the show's taping into one measly tapeworm with AIDS who then informed on them to the government for Possession of an Undeclared Tapeworm and AIDS Hoarding. In fact, the Daily Mail says other people say this is total crap, too: Many commenters, however, claim that cases on the show aren't real. One wrote: 'Show is super fake…they hire perfect strangers to act out stuff that may or may not have happened in real life.'So why am I posting this? Because it was a chance to say "That's what xhe said" and I'm not sure if the opportunity will come up again. This week. As far as I know, this is the world's first deployment of "That's what xhe said." For the first time in my adult life I'm proud of being a second-tier blogger. It's a proud day for humanity of all genders, whether male, female, or made-up. Comments(Jump to bottom of comments)Posted by: profligatewaste at April 19, 2017 04:04 PM (+yY4e) Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:05 PM (oR5ks) 3
I understood nothing written above, thank God.
Posted by: Dr Spank at April 19, 2017 04:05 PM (4e+hS) 4
Because it was a chance to say "That's what xhe said" and I'm not sure if the opportunity will come up again. This week.
It was worth it to wade through the story just to read that line. Posted by: LASue, now even more deplorable! at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (CLKfs) 5
How does that even work?
Posted by: The Great White Scotsman at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (le7jz) 6
I don't quite understand.
Posted by: Weasel at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (Sfs6o) 7
I'm sure the family is happy to see the details of Miguel's death publicized.
Whatever happened to shame? Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (7ZVPa) 8
There's a rational explanation for this -- the universe has gone mad and
we are all now trapped in a lunatic asylum of infinite size. === Oh. Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (9zO9Q) 9
Broke Dick mountain
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (6Ll1u) 10
How can you be "transgender" and still have the original plumbing?
Posted by: Dr Spank at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (4e+hS) 11
Transgender woman, a.k.a. a man. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (/MtvT) 12
This was Charlie Sheen's future, dying with his cock in a tranny butthole,, but he got AIDS instead.
#Winning Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (2qHjF) 13
Pronouns matter.
Posted by: fluffy at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (jw2Xw) 14
I'm sensing.....floppy wieners!
Posted by: Shep at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (vg8iE) 15
Bury My Boner At Broken Penis Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (M0wRt) 16
Yesterday we were all like "how great is the history of AoSHQ, and how wonderful has been the imagination of Ace to inspire it."
And today we're all like "WTAF?" This is the great cycle of the HQ. Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (wB8Tg) Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (9zO9Q) 18
invented to get a all-expenses-included trip to luxurious Venezuela
-- All expenses vary by the hour in a hyperinflationary economy, and personal safety is not guaranteed. Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:08 PM (7ZVPa) Posted by: O'Reilly at April 19, 2017 04:08 PM (4e+hS) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:08 PM (/MtvT) 21
>>>I understood nothing written above, thank God.
Let me mansplain it for you: 1.Dude looks like a lady. 2. Me love you long time. 3. Croak! 4. Pop goes the weasel. 5. You broke it you bought it. Posted by: Max Power at April 19, 2017 04:08 PM (q177U) 22
I can say for a fact American court shows are fake too. A co-worker's nephew who is an aspiring comedian/actor in LA appeared on one.
Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (vg8iE) 23
I can confirm that Caso Cerrado has some completely bizarre shit. I don't speak much Spanish but, my in-laws watch it.
Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (ZQpd0) 24
Ace, we wouldn't want you to waste an opportunity to employ a good line.
Posted by: Emmie at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (xVuS6) 25
Led Zeppelin... When the Penis Breaks
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (6Ll1u) 26
Ace, I'm so proud of you. I'm tearing up. And I promised myself that I wouldn't cry.
Posted by: StrawMan at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (hQt/L) 27
I get that it's fake, but how sick do you have to be to make this up?
Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 19, 2017 04:09 PM (kTF2Z) Posted by: Weasel at April 19, 2017 04:10 PM (Sfs6o) Posted by: O'Reilly at April 19, 2017 04:10 PM (4e+hS) 30
fantastic headline ace
Posted by: chris at April 19, 2017 04:10 PM (LQPji) 31
BrokeDick Mountin'
Posted by: Joe Mama at April 19, 2017 04:10 PM (M5NPS) Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 04:10 PM (GgzGa) 33
Good to know for future reference. Good. To. Know.
Posted by: Reggie Love at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (bc2Lc) 34
I think that you are not really a woman until that 60 Minutes guy drinks champagne out of your ass, so, yeah, fake news.
Posted by: blaster at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (tewYv) 35
Ok, first of all 'That's what Xhe said' is destined to be a classic...if we live long enough as a species.
But more importantly, you fuck the tranny, you don't let the tranny fuck you. Rookie mistake. Or so I've heard. Apologies if this is too blue for the hour of the day. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (zsHGH) 36
Bailiff, whack her pee-pee
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (voOPb) 37
The patriarchy broke my penis!
Posted by: some chick at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (pMGkg) 38
You know what I miss? Closets. And the people who stayed in them. I also miss mental institutions.
Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (qJhUV) 39
Is it ok for me to use "his vag" if I restrict it to say, Fred Barnes and Bob Costas?
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (B+qrE) 40
This is one of those situations where one thinks, hey, maybe things like the 10 Commandments and marriage vows, which we're told are so outdated and boring, protect you from really mess sh#t like this.
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (NOIQH) Posted by: Mortimer - Finish Her! at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (9zO9Q) 42
So, with all of this "new-gender-with-an-X" stuff, was Xerxes the King of Persia or Queen of Persia?
Posted by: Gunslinger at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (4S7hN) Posted by: redbanzai at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (3JA/M) Posted by: Azathoth at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (dazWW) 45
This was Charlie Sheen's future, dying with his cock in a tranny butthole,, but he got AIDS instead.
#Winning Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (2qHjF) Except, if you read closely, you'll see it was HER (XHER?) dick in the heterosexual (?) butthole... not the other way around. Let's get the facts straight here, folks. Posted by: LASue, now even more deplorable! at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (CLKfs) Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzzy at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (Y3x2d) 47
But Ace, at least you're a first rate second tier blogger.
Posted by: Sausage McMuffin at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (e4ZX9) 48
"Hold stick near centre of its length. Moisten pointed end in mouth. Insert in tooth space, blunt end next to gum. Use gentle in-out motion."
Posted by: Wonko the Sane (from outside the asylum) at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (2lndx) 49
When people talk about wanting to die during sex...
I don't think they envision "with a tranny dick in your ass" Posted by: wooga at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (KzDOU) 50
>>
You know what I miss? Closets. And the people who stayed in them. I also miss mental institutions. So much THIS. Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (NOIQH) 51
>>>For the first time in my adult life I'm proud of being a second-tier blogger.
I'm tired of you selling yourself short. Kaboom and Peruvia differ with you and your assessment. Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (voOPb) 52
I hate this crap , don't even want to talk about it.
Here is some info on a possible upcoming recession https://tinyurl.com/lda5zgs Posted by: MAGA at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (LQ1Q3) 53
Think "Iranian Lollypop" is in the Urban Dictionary?
Posted by: Gunslinger at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (4S7hN) 54
How you break a dick?
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (vZ0KM) 55
Post office customer: This tape is not enough to wrap my package.
Post office guy: that's what xhe said. Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (loJzf) 56
Is there an exit door on this planet?
Posted by: Tami at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (Enq6K) 57
You know what I miss? Closets. And the people who stayed in them. I also miss mental institutions.
Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (qJhUV) Word. Posted by: redbanzai at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (3JA/M) 58
Seriously question would you rather be Charlie Sheen Wealthy with AIDS, or be mixed up in this public freak show as the dead person or broken dick person?
I'm taking the former. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (2qHjF) 59
I don't quite understand.
Posted by: Weasel at April 19, 2017 04:06 PM (Sfs6o) ............ I know, I'm confused, too. Posted by: Bruce Jenner at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (HgMAr) 60
40 This is one of those situations where one thinks, hey, maybe things like the 10 Commandments and marriage vows, which we're told are so outdated and boring, protect you from really mess sh#t like this.
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (NOIQH) I'd agree, except for the fact that in order to hit this level - you need to be *trying*. Posted by: Not Moses at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (tQSaB) 61
Can't wait for the next primetime reality show picking up on this story line. I just hope it's not the WWE.
Posted by: auscolpyr at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (suO/a) 62
Let's get back to discussing Caroline Munro... Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (/MtvT) 63
All of this is insanity and the more we indulge it, the more we get.
I don't recognize my country anymore. Posted by: LGoPs at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (kXoPF) 64
--
-- Is it ok for me to use "his vag" if I restrict it to say, Fred Barnes and Bob Costas? Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM ------------ ----------- All I know is; don't pull your thumb out of your vag and then rub your eye. Posted by: Bob Costas at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (pMGkg) 65
You know what I miss? Closets. And the people who stayed in them. I also miss mental institutions.
Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 04:11 PM (qJhUV) ---------- Hear, hear. On top of everything else that's disturbing about this story, I'm too old to be learning new pronouns. Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (sBOL1) 66
I get that it's fake, but how sick do you have to be to make this up? ========= Nothing new, really. Check out the discussion of Greek mythology earlier today. And that was some of the mild stuff the gods did. Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (ZQpd0) 67
What a stupid time to be alive...
Posted by: The Political Hat at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (rUIbB) 68
I think the wife wanted him "offed.' It was a convoluted hit job though...
Posted by: JoeF. at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (7uYFy) 69
There's a rational and reassuring explanation for this -- the universe has gone mad and we are all now trapped in a lunatic asylum of infinite size and you are trapped here forever until you agree to voluntarily make yourself insane as well. And then you die.
I'm oddly comforted by this. Posted by: Puddleglum at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (yc6aH) 70
This universe is really strange and bizarre. I can't make any sense out of it.
What a time to need a new typewriter ribbon. Posted by: Philip K. Dick at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (SAOMr) 71
Moral: 60 years old is too old to be taking it up the squeakhole from a guy in a frilly negligee.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 04:15 PM (4vuMP) Posted by: North Korean Satellite-Borne Nuclear EMP at April 19, 2017 04:15 PM (9zO9Q) 73
54 How you break a dick?
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:13 PM (vZ0KM) Rupture one of the sacs that fills with blood to make the stiffy. Just a bent one hurts enough. Posted by: Not Dr. Oz at April 19, 2017 04:15 PM (tQSaB) 74
That guy from Three Dog Night got a broken penis, but at least it was real and because he got laid to much. How is there not a statue of this guy somewhere?
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:15 PM (6Ll1u) Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 04:15 PM (8b+oT) 76
If you drive without insurance and wreck your car, guess what? You're on the hook for it. Same goes for cheaping out on getting-paid-by-a-guy's-wife dick insurance. Cry xe a river.
Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (8nWyX) 77
Soooo, a wife *paid* a guy with breast implants to anally penetrate her husband? And that went badly. There is at least a novel's worth of "the rest of the story" in all that.
Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (sEDyY) 78
Tillerson is taking it to Iran right now. Wonder what's up.
Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (kTF2Z) 79
So Mom, how did Dad die?
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (WSWlB) 80
45 This was Charlie Sheen's future, dying with his cock in a tranny butthole,, but he got AIDS instead.
#Winning Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (2qHjF) Except, if you read closely, you'll see it was HER (XHER?) dick in the heterosexual (?) butthole... not the other way around. Let's get the facts straight here, folks. Posted by: LASue, now even more deplorable! at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (CLKfs) I'll admit to being completely confused by all of this. Either dead or broken penis in Tranny Fanny would be Charlie Sheen's future but he got AIDS. And I would not be surprise if I still got it wrong on the second attempt. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (2qHjF) Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (vZ0KM) 82
I called my financial advisor and told him I want to start investing in closet manufacturers.
And I'm only half joking. I was tolerant long before it became fashionable. But my patience is coming to an end. Posted by: LGoPs at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (kXoPF) 83
68 I think the wife wanted him "offed.' It was a convoluted hit job though...
Posted by: JoeF. at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (7uYFy) ------- Even planning it would not have been possible in the days before PowerPoint was invented. Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (4vuMP) 84
Did the wife tie hubby to the bed and then introduce him to the xhe she got him for his birthday. Because that surprise would explain the heart attack.
Posted by: Buzzsaw at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (5Ad9s) 85
1
I'm confused. Posted by: profligatewaste at April 19, 2017 04:04 PM (+yY4e) ==== Me too. I just cannot follow these TG stories. It takes several readings to figure out which entities have which chromosomes and which ones have been mutilated and how (surgery, hormones or both). A Dramatis Personae should really be compulsory. Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (EoAgi) Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (NOIQH) 87
83 68 I think the wife wanted him "offed.' It was a convoluted hit job though...
========== And, in the end, no one got off. Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (vg8iE) 88
This universe is really strange and bizarre. I can't make any sense out of it.
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. -- Douglas Adams Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (B+qrE) 89
Can't wait for the next primetime reality show picking up on this story line. I just hope it's not the WWE. ======= That's why I stick with Lucha Underground. It's actually pretty damned good wrestling. Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (ZQpd0) 90
78 Tillerson is taking it to Iran right now. Wonder what's up.
Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 19, 2017 04:16 PM (kTF2Z) -------- Maybe we want our pallet of cash back? Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (4vuMP) 91
Except, if you read closely, you'll see it was HER (XHER?) dick in the heterosexual (?) butthole... not the other way around. Let's get the facts straight here, folks.
Posted by: LASue If a male has a dick in his bung hole and he is not being raped, he's NOT heterosexual. Let's get the facts straight. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (vZ0KM) 92
Pronoun cleansing:
Jennifer, who is transgender and still has his male genitalia (in other words, a dude), claimed defendant Sylvia hired her to sleep with her husband, Miguel (oh, weird shit), on his 60th birthday But while the dude with tits was having sex with the old dude, the old dude had a heart attack and died. The chick-with-dick sued Sylvia for 16,000 somethings, claiming Miguel broke "her penis" (heh, heh) when he died. She said that the freak was still inside of Miguel when he collapsed and died. --- We need a sinkhole under these people, stat. Posted by: JEM at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (TppKb) Posted by: joe, living dangerously at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (KUaJL) Posted by: ThunderB at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (p1kLq) 95
Speaking of Venezuela, I'm only hearing of crazy crap happening over there.
Posted by: Draki at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (Y0byY) Posted by: A former male Olympic decathlete on a Wheaties box at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (9zO9Q) 97
I got nothin'...
Posted by: John Bobbitt at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (DpOmP) 98
In many ways, this is the story of Barry and Michael.
Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (2qHjF) 99
the more we indulge it, the more we get.
=========================== Bingo. And the more routine the reaction becomes, the more "normalized" it is, they just ramp it up to the next level of down. They have to keep making things weirder and weirder in order to get the reaction they crave. Posted by: grammie winger at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (lwiT4) 100
How come nobody on the left, or in the media (but I repeat myself) has ever looked at the transgender mania and said WTF--this isn't what I signed up for?
Posted by: Northernlurker at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (hJrjt) 101
The real question is: MLok or KeyMod for a new AR handguard?
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (GX63o) 102
when I read this I keep thinking that the Hittites got gender right. Animate and inanimate. if you are animate you share the same gender and if you're a corpse, you can't complain.
Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (SnZH4) 103
Let's get back to discussing Caroline Munro...
Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (/MtvT) I am ok with that. She looked really, really good in Starcrash. (Which is on the new meh season of MST3K on Netflix.) Basically wearing a bikini and CFM boots the whole run time. Like Zardoz, only sexy. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (zsHGH) 104
All I know is that somebody's dick was in somebody's bunghole.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 04:19 PM (4vuMP) 105
When I was in college back in the 70's we studied this in some of my Pre-Med classes. There was a clinical name for it back then.....and I'm trying to remember it....oh yeah...it was called Fucked in the Head Syndrome.
Posted by: LGoPs at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (kXoPF) Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (B+qrE) 107
As far as I know, this is the world's first deployment of "That's what xhe said."
........... I've used "That's what xhe told me at the picnic." Posted by: Shep Smith at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (HgMAr) 108
you probably didn't want to get put in a Hittite prison though.
Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (SnZH4) 109
One dors not simply break a penis.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (r/0kC) 110
Maybe we want our pallet of cash back?
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 04:18 PM (4vuMP) NO REFUNDS! NO SUBSTITUTIONS! YOU GO NOW! Posted by: redbanzai at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (3JA/M) 111
10 How can you be "transgender" and still have the original plumbing? Posted by: Dr Spank at April 19, 2017 04:07 PM (4e+hS) Less and less of them actually go through with getting it whacked, anymore. Especially the ones for whom it's not about "being a woman", but it's specifically about "being trans". Posted by: Hikaru at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (CMbMd) 112
88: Douglas Adams was an evangelical atheist but he could be frighteningly profound and funny.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 19, 2017 04:20 PM (yc6aH) 113
This is one of those situations where one thinks, hey, maybe things like the 10 Commandments and marriage vows, which we're told are so outdated and boring, protect you from really mess sh#t like this.
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:12 PM (NOIQH) Well, technically, there is no specific prohibition on a wife paying a tranny to ride her husband so you could say that it doesn't help here. But, yeah, it is kinda like that joke about there are laws against animal necrophilia. They had to make a law forbidding that? Posted by: blaster at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (tewYv) Posted by: Max Power at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (q177U) 115
The real question is: MLok or KeyMod for a new AR handguard?
Posted by: flounder KeyMod is cool. Just remember to order the picatinny rails for KeyMod. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (vZ0KM) 116
So Miguel's wife thought he wanted a tranny dick in his ass for his sixtieth birthday?
Pretty sure that's the traditional gift for your 32nd anniversary. Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (8b+oT) 117
OT, Fox announces Tucker in at 8pm slot
Posted by: CSMBigBird at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (jsWA8) 118
You never want to show up at the pearly gates with a tranny dick up your ass Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (lKyWE) Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (zsHGH) 120
I called my financial advisor and told him I want to start investing in closet manufacturers.
And I'm only half joking. I was tolerant long before it became fashionable. But my patience is coming to an end. Posted by: LGoPs at April 19, 2017 04:17 PM (kXoPF) ======= I also used to be in the I don't care camp. Then they couldn't shut up enough and they made me care, and not in a good way. Posted by: Uber Lyft Driver at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (jtyvF) 121
Yeah, IDK.
The story in the Daily Mail doesn't identify where this happened. It was on a Telemundo court show... where? I'm hoping that this could be a "scripted" reality show, ie, "fictional." I guess the purpose of all if it is to say "women with dicks have problems too" or maybe "yeah, it's totes ok to pay someone to have sex with your husband?" Or possibly "nothing is abnormal and you're a hater if you say a beautiful woman with a c*ck is a freak." Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (FkAXz) 122
But, yeah, it is kinda like that joke about there are laws against animal necrophilia. They had to make a law forbidding that?
Srsly? I mean really! Who stops when the chicken dies? Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (vZ0KM) 123
I was thinking/hoping that the "How do you break a penis?" question was rhetorical.
Posted by: Dr Spank at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (4e+hS) 124
>>>but it's specifically about "being trans".
Exactly, it's classic market forces at work. Supply and demand. Posted by: Max Power at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (q177U) 125
Xers and Xims of the Jury, Xis was going to cut it off anyway!
Posted by: Xherms' Lawyer at April 19, 2017 04:23 PM (oVJmc) 126
100 How come nobody on the left, or in the media (but I repeat myself) has ever looked at the transgender mania and said WTF--this isn't what I signed up for?
Posted by: Northernlurker And pass up another chance to stick it to all those bigoted Christianist intolerant flyover sister humping rubes? No way. Posted by: Puddleglum at April 19, 2017 04:23 PM (yc6aH) 127
1 I'm confused.
Posted by: profligatewaste at April 19, 2017 04:04 PM (+yY4e) Congratulations! That means you're sane. Posted by: rickl at April 19, 2017 04:23 PM (xjiRE) 128
She looked really, really good in Starcrash. Which is exactly why I mentioned her! I just downloaded this 1978 scifi movie for later viewing. David Hasselhoff is in it. Christopher Plummer, too. Willie Cicci from The Godfather is also in it. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:23 PM (/MtvT) 129
Boys have a penis
Girls have a vagina Xhes have a worn out, broken something or other in need of another doctor Posted by: little kid at April 19, 2017 04:23 PM (HgMAr) 130
Xi went out doing what xi loved.
Posted by: navybrat at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (w7KSn) 131
So hawt.
Posted by: Shep Smith at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (X+rUO) 132
Anthony Weiner suddenly seems so normal.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (oVJmc) 133
Speaking of Venezuela, I'm only hearing of crazy crap happening over there.
Posted by: Draki -- Tip of the day: all Venezuelan chicks swallow, its about the only source of protein they can get. Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (7ZVPa) 134
As far as I know, this is the world's first deployment of "That's what xhe said." For the first time in my adult life I'm proud of being a second-tier blogger. Awww......you're the bestest second-tier blogger we know. Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (PY9jH) 135
You know eventually the bachelor or bachelorette show is going to have a transgender season.
Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (loJzf) Posted by: looking closely at April 19, 2017 04:24 PM (0hzM1) 137
Less and less of them actually go through with getting it whacked, anymore. Especially the ones for whom it's not about "being a woman", but it's specifically about "being trans".
-- And by "being trans" you mean "crossdressing all the time" right? /poor Rick James. Nothing is Superfreaky any more. Nothing at all.... Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (FkAXz) 138
I'm just glad Lucas McCain isn't around to see this.
Posted by: Lord Sir x at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (nFwvY) 139
Perversion.
It's become common. Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (0tfLf) 140
>>Well, technically, there is no specific prohibition on a wife paying a
tranny to ride her husband so you could say that it doesn't help here. There's usually a "forsake all others" part in the marriage vows, which would have prevented this nonsense. Generally, inviting a 3rd (and 4th, 5th..) person into a marriage doesn't end well. Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (NOIQH) Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (EoAgi) 142
Boys have a penis
Girls have a vagina Xhes have a worn out, broken FIFY Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (vZ0KM) 143
I also used to be in the I don't care camp. Then they couldn't shut up enough and they made me care, and not in a good way.
Posted by: Uber Lyft Driver at April 19, 2017 04:22 PM (jtyvF) The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are. And they will eventually let you know. They have to, because it's about validation for them. They have to convince the world that they are "normal". Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (S2V6F) Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (ZMe1w) 145
we're a demented society. I suppose the wife got a cheap rate, two genderlicious for the price of one.
and srsly, I would never have had this on my list of 'to do's' Posted by: willow at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (4lrrm) 146
Tranny has a Cenk Uygur quality.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (oVJmc) 147
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile We have a WINNAH! Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (DQ4Fv) 148
Transgender woman who 'suffered a broken penis when her lover had a heart attack and DIED during sex' sues the man's wife for damages
LOL. The wife (if it is a wife ... who knows?) should sue the tranny for services performed to advance his pre-op preparation. Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (zc3Db) 149
Bent it? Hell I broke it!
Posted by: Just the punchline at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (loJzf) 150
Hell, this is pretty messed up, and I'm drunk all the time
Posted by: Shillary at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (k0vjy) 151
he should be called Christopher Slummer. he got roles in classics like The Man Who Would Be King and then goes off to appear in SF crap like Starcrash
not that I am complaining. he was a fine ham in Star Trek 6, quoting Shakespeare at Shatner. Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (SnZH4) 152
Tip of the day: all Venezuelan chicks swallow,
its about the only source of protein they can get. Posted by: Vashta Nerada Note to self: call travel agent. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (vZ0KM) 153
She looked really, really good in Starcrash.
Starcrash. I don't even think I remember the movie, even Munro. But it was a magnificent experience. My date's choice of wardrobe that night was loose and casual everywhere. The next two hours proved that to be very intentional. The things you'll do in a half-empty theater when you're 19...we actually had a nice few years thereafter. Posted by: JEM at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (TppKb) 154
Hold my beer.
Posted by: Bill Clinton at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (4e+hS) 155
They have to convince the world that they are "normal".
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile ----- Weird world out there... Posted by: A man with another man's fist in his ass at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (8b+oT) 156
I read the entire post twice. I still don't understand.
*listens for sounds of Four Horsemen overhead* Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (PY9jH) 157
OT, Fox announces Tucker in at 8pm slot
Posted by: CSMBigBird at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (jsWA[/i[ That's not OT to this thread. Posted by: blaster at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (tewYv) 158
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
And they will eventually let you know. They have to, because it's about validation for them. They have to convince the world that they are "normal". Agreed. In addition they're making the rest of us their therapy couch. To work out their fucked-uppedness. And I am starting to resent it. Posted by: LGoPs at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (kXoPF) 159
Lou Reed unavailable for comment
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (6Ll1u) 160
Let's get back to discussing Caroline Munro...
Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:14 PM (/MtvT) She was gorgeous back in the day but I saw a photo of her from some recent Bond event with George Lazenby and a few other Bond girls and well...she was gorgeous back in the day Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (493sH) Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (vZ0KM) Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (QM5S2) 163
he got roles in classics like The Man Who Would Be King and then goes off to appear in SF crap like Starcrash Kinda like that other Christopher. Whatshisname. Saurpod. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (/MtvT) Posted by: blaster at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (tewYv) 165
Well, technically, there is no specific prohibition on a wife paying a
tranny to ride her husband so you could say that it doesn't help here. But, did the husband know? Maybe he didn't. Maybe the wife was pissed at hubby and paid the tranny to nail him in the keister while he was asleep. He woke up with a guy's dick up his ass, had a heart attack, and died. Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (zc3Db) 166
Yeah, Ace - "That's what xhe said" is pretty good. Good job.
Posted by: BJ at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (GtEyF) 167
115
The real question is: MLok or KeyMod for a new AR handguard? Posted by: flounder KeyMod is cool. Just remember to order the picatinny rails for KeyMod. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (vZ0KM) Which one's the BetaMax? And I don't necessarily need or want side or bottom rails, just longer sight radius of the new handguard and a bipod mount. Here is what I am looking at.http://www.seekinsprecision.com/noxs-mlok-rail-1-1.html Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (GX63o) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:28 PM (/MtvT) Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (ti1Hf) 170
*sigh. Marks off another link that had been bookmarked for tomorrows ONT*
Posted by: weirddave at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (Feqz7) 171
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile We have a WINNAH! Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (DQ4Fv) Years ago I came across an article interviewing "conservative swingers". What struck me is that the couple being interviewed talked about how they wanted to one day come out of the shadows and "be who they truly are." Who the fuck needs to know about their sex life? This wasn't "keep the government out of my bedroom", this was "let's put the bedroom out on the front lawn" and they expected it to somehow not change people's opinion of them. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (S2V6F) Posted by: Bruce at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (k0vjy) 173
I read the entire post twice. I still don't understand.
*listens for sounds of Four Horsemen overhead* Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM You're better than I, Jane. I read it once and I need a drink. What a very stupid time to be alive. Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (p+Wdc) 174
Uh-oh, butthurt aplenty:
"Harvey Mudd College has been roiled by a self-study, informally titled the Wabash report, that referred to some anonymous faculty declaring that efforts to promote diversity in the student body had lowered the quality of the school. At first, the school tried to block publication or censor parts of the report, completed in 2015, but leaks began and The Student Life, the school newspaper, ran what it said was the full report on March 24 of this year." Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (GgzGa) 175
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
Suppose a person hated fucking monkeys, but still kept fucking them... Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (oVJmc) 176
Well, technically, there is no specific prohibition on a wife paying a
tranny to ride her husband so you could say that it doesn't help here. There's usually a "forsake all others" part in the marriage vows, which would have prevented this nonsense. Generally, inviting a 3rd (and 4th, 5th..) person into a marriage doesn't end well. Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:25 PM (NOIQH) There is also "Thou shalt not commit adultery"... that is one of the 10 biggies. Posted by: redbanzai at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (3JA/M) Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (loJzf) 178
I was channel surfing some years ago and came across an episode of Cheaters. The owner of a local comic book store was presented with video of his girlfriend cheating. I've been to that store and my first reaction was, "Wait, I know this guy. He's gay." What little regard I had for "reality TV" was lost forever on that day.
Posted by: Pete in Texas at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (uPEP1) 179
157
OT, Fox announces Tucker in at 8pm slot Posted by: CSMBigBird at April 19, 2017 04:21 PM (jsWA[/i[ That's not OT to this thread. Posted by: blaster at April 19, 2017 04:27 PM (tewYv) ISWYDT Golf clap Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (jxbfJ) 180
If this is what you get for your sixtieth birthday, shoot me when I'm 59.
Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (8b+oT) 181
Uh-oh, butthurt aplenty:
"Harvey Mudd College has been roiled by a self-study, informally titled the Wabash report, that referred to some anonymous faculty declaring that efforts to promote diversity in the student body had lowered the quality of the school. At first, the school tried to block publication or censor parts of the report, completed in 2015, but leaks began and The Student Life, the school newspaper, ran what it said was the full report on March 24 of this year." Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (GgzGa) A friend's hubby went to Harvey Mudd and supposedly it's a source of pride that the school is supposed to be incredibly difficult. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:31 PM (S2V6F) 182
>>>They have to, because it's about validation for them. They have to convince the world that they are "normal".
Is it normal to enjoy doing it doggy style while I play butt bongos singing "BABALOOO" wearing a matador hat? Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:31 PM (ZMe1w) 183
"....when her lover had a heart attack and DIED during sex."
If he was paid the guy wasn't his "lover". He is either a rapist or a prostitute. And I agree with the commenter who asked how messed up a person would have to be to invent this story. Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (sEDyY) Posted by: Stella at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (oVJmc) 185
Is it normal to enjoy doing it doggy style while I play butt bongos singing "BABALOOO" wearing a matador hat?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:31 PM (ZMe1w) If it's Winona, it's not just normal but *mandatory*. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (S2V6F) 186
Just out of curiosity, as I will never use the term out loud, how does one pronounce xhe? Is it pronounced the same but only spelled differently?
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (7ZVPa) 187
She said that she was still inside of Miguel when he collapsed and died
............ guy must have had a healthy sphincter Posted by: wth at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (HgMAr) 188
If my wife offered me this, I serve her with at fault divorce papers and criminal charges for conspiracy and attempted Murdrer because this is how you get AIDS and Hep C. Restraining order. Alimony. She would be homeless when I got finished with her.
Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (2qHjF) 189
I don't think this happened in a foreign country.
A different world, maybe, but not a foreign country. Posted by: aelfheld at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (IxDhF) Posted by: Stella at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (oVJmc) 191
A friend's hubby went to Harvey Mudd and supposedly it's a source of pride that the school is supposed to be incredibly difficult.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:31 PM (S2V6F) Is it better than the Harry Mudd school? Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (493sH) 192
"Harvey Mudd College has been roiled by a self-study, informally
titled the Wabash report, that referred to some anonymous faculty declaring that efforts to promote diversity in the student body had lowered the quality of the school. At first, the school tried to block publication or censor parts of the report, completed in 2015, but leaks began and The Student Life, the school newspaper, ran what it said was the full report on March 24 of this year." Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (GgzGa) Meh. ALl you have to do is look at the average SAT score and see how it's dropped. No need for any study or comment by faculty. Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (zc3Db) 193
It's a proud day for humanity of all genders, whether male, female, or made-up. Posted by: Ace at 04:02 PM Unless of course you are named Miguel and forever remembered has dying from a heart attack when a trannie had her dick up your a**. Could make for some interesting epitaphs. Where is Muldoon?? Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (jxbfJ) 194
Just out of curiosity, as I will never use the term
out loud, how does one pronounce xhe? Is it pronounced the same but only spelled differently? Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (7ZVPa) I've been pronouncing it "zhee". Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (S2V6F) 195
thou shalt commit adultery, it says so here in 1631 King James. it is God's work the Paolo does.
Posted by: Paolo at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (SnZH4) 196
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
What is the definition of kink? The strange shit other people like. I will admit that whenever I think I am a cosmopolitan person of the world, I wander into some of the not even that odd portions of fandom and I'm all yeah I'm more like a 12 year old Amish kid and I'm perfectly fine with that. Posted by: alexthechick - rrraaawwwrrr at April 19, 2017 04:33 PM (mf5HN) 197
>>>185 Is it normal to enjoy doing it doggy style while I play butt bongos singing "BABALOOO" wearing a matador hat?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:31 PM (ZMe1w) If it's Winona, it's not just normal but *mandatory*. YES. YES IT IS. Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:34 PM (ZMe1w) 198
They should change the name of the college to Harry Mudd. They would get a diverse set of Star Trek students.
Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:34 PM (loJzf) 199
Which one's the BetaMax? And I don't necessarily need or want side or bottom rails, just longer sight radius of the new handguard and a bipod mount.
Here's the keymod I just went with: http://bit.ly/2pDDDmf Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:34 PM (vZ0KM) 200
...and I'm takin' you with me!
Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:34 PM (8b+oT) 201
Um...What? Am I awake right now?
Posted by: Aunt Luna at April 19, 2017 04:35 PM (Zd2ZF) 202
Will ESPN give the plaintiff the "Courage" award?
Posted by: Cruader at April 19, 2017 04:35 PM (ewSN2) 203
Four Horsemynz of the Apocalypse
Posted by: wooga at April 19, 2017 04:35 PM (KzDOU) Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (loJzf) 205
"I will break you."
Posted by: Miguel's butthole, immitating Dolf Lundgren in that Rocky movie at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (8b+oT) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (/MtvT) 207
So another script flushed down the toilet for a Spanish soap opera...
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (uJ/du) 208
Who the fuck needs to know about their sex life? This wasn't "keep the government out of my bedroom", this was "let's put the bedroom out on the front lawn" and they expected it to somehow not change people's opinion of them.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:29 PM (S2V6F) *ding* The only reason I would ever need to know anything about what you're doing in bed, on the washing machine, or whatever is: - we're sharing a house and I need to know when/where to avoid - I'm expected to be involved in some manner, because you're my girlfriend and I'm supposed to be participating instead of playing video games or something IDK Other than that, no one cares. That's why for some people it's not about acceptance or indifference, it's "you will be made to care". Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (8nWyX) 209
This calls to mind that proud day at the height of the Abu Ghraib crisis when you coined the phrase "Naked Arab Jenga".
Posted by: ZBBMcFate at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (kxpmC) 210
If you think this is sick, I challenge you to go to downtown Frankfurt to a sex shop and open up one of the books there.
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (6Ll1u) 211
The weirder the person's sex life, the more fucked in the head they are.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile But seriously, abnormal sexual impulses and behavior are in almost every case what is called a "comorbidity" for other more serious psychological disorders. Everyone in this unhinged modern society of ours all act like each lunatic's sexual fetish is the central significant factor worth noting, discussing, identifying and celebrating -- when in fact the sexual aspect of their mental disorder is in reality a side issue ("comorbidity" in medical-talk), not the core issue. Usually, it is an indication that the person is just plain "crazy" (in non-medical talk). A comparable situation would be that someone complains of having yellowed whites of their eyes, and go to the doctor and say, "Doc, my eyes are yellow! What does it mean?" and the doc says, "Oh, the yellowing of your eyes is not the germane issue at hand here -- it is only an indicator of and a comorbidity of a much more situation condition called jaundice. We really need to treat your jaundice." and then the patient says, "But I am a member of the Yellow-Eye Tribe! I just joined!" So in the modern insane world we now live in, the doctor would say, "Well, why didn't you say so earlier? If you are a Yellow Eye, then we don't need to treat your jaundice, because having yellow eyes is now your identity. Congratulations!" Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (DQ4Fv) 212
Worst surprise birthday party ever.
Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (8b+oT) 213
"I will break you."
Posted by: Miguel's butthole, immitating Dolf Lundgren in that Rocky movie at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (8b+oT) *iced tea everywhere* Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (PY9jH) 214
183 "....when her lover had a heart attack and DIED during sex."
If he was paid the guy wasn't his "lover". He is either a rapist or a prostitute. And I agree with the commenter who asked how messed up a person would have to be to invent this story. Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 04:32 PM (sEDyY) What is not been brought up because wife and woman, is that she is an accessory to Murder or Manslaughter because a crime was committed when paying for the Tranny to fuck her husband. The man died during the commission of a criminal act. Both the wife and the tranny should have charges brought against them. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (2qHjF) 215
>>>Anyone else gnashing their teeth a lot, lately?
Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:36 PM (/MtvT) I've been known to beat a brow and rend a garment from time to time. Posted by: Max Power at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (q177U) Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (B+qrE) Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (QM5S2) 218
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (ZMe1w) 219
meanwhile, another story just as weird, but likely "truthier":
GP link, but traces back to American Spectator the Guardian thegatewaypundit.com/2017/04/report-john-brennan- colluded-foreign-spies-falsify-trump-russia-connections/ Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (4Luun) 220
more situation condition = more serious condition
Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (DQ4Fv) 221
>>>180 If this is what you get for your sixtieth birthday, shoot me when I'm 59.
It's the new penalty for withdrawing funds from your 401k before you turn 59 1/2. Posted by: wooga at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (KzDOU) 222
I had to read this a few times, and I wished I didn't. What kind of wife gives her husband sex time with a tranny for his 60th birthday? I suppose it could have been worst..could have been a midget tranny...
Posted by: IC at April 19, 2017 04:39 PM (a0IVu) 223
I think I need a safety harness for the bumpy ride that is this Brave New World. We had a presentation from the head of the DIE group at work, ahead of a survey that "super duper promise you will be anonymous" to collect any grievances anyone has.
My take on this whole thing is that modern times call for dredging up that time in grade school when you felt left out and feeling just as whiny if your co-workers happen to go for lunch w/o asking you to come along, even if they are going to the Mongolian grill and you are a vehement vegan. In addition to the "it is unacceptable if anyone is made to feel like this (pic of sad little girl sitting alone on playground)" it was mentioned twice that people need to "feel like they can bring their whole lives to work" -- WTF, how about instead we all get to keep our private lives private and NO ONE at work is made to feel like they have to act as an unpaid therapist because someone had a bad day at home because the pet puked, room-mate was bitchy or what ever. I don't care if you are a trans-gendered furry on your own time, but I'd prefer not to worry about HR forcing me to do a bunch of sensitivity training if you announce this at work and I make a face instead of applauding you. The other thing they are trying to push is that diversity is SO valuable that hiring from outside your common experience will strengthen the group even if that outsider is not a smart as the white bread choice was. They didn't state it quite that blatantly but thats what they are pushing. This insanity will collapse things as it must unless society turns away from it. And my general luck in life, the collapse will happen not now when I am still somewhat fit and would have some chance in a survival of the fittest and not after I die, but just in time for me to be preyed upon in old age. Posted by: PaleRider at April 19, 2017 04:39 PM (eASYU) Posted by: aelfheld at April 19, 2017 04:39 PM (IxDhF) Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:39 PM (B+qrE) Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (vZ0KM) 227
Oh my god why have you abandoned humanity?
Or more likely why has humanity abandoned god? (to a very large extent) Posted by: USNtakim at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (hMqvx) 228
There once was a confused lonely he/she,
who didn't know where to go pee pee, it got dorked in the squeak hole , by a perverted frijole, and now you're confused as the he/she. Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (GX63o) Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (PY9jH) 230
I suppose it could have been worst..could have been a midget tranny...
Posted by: IC at April 19, 2017 04:39 PM (a0IVu) Miguel might still be alive. Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (8nWyX) 231
214
The man died during the commission of a criminal act. Both the wife and the tranny should have charges brought against them. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (2qHjF) Assault with a dirty weapon?(turd)Burglary? Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (jxbfJ) 232
Why is she/he/it upset about a broken dick if it's going to get cut off anyway?
Posted by: aelfheld at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (IxDhF) 233
The man died during the commission of a criminal act.
Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (2qHjF) Is "the act", in question, illegal in Florida? Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (EoAgi) 234
I find myself grinding and gnashing a lot, lately. Not good. But yeah, no garment rendering yet. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (/MtvT) 235
I read it three times over and I'm still confused. Who did what to whom?
Posted by: Semi-engaged Scroller at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (LQLeS) 236
The horde needs to throw a surprise party for Ace's 30th birthday.
We're going to need a time machine. Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (B+qrE) 237
I'm sure Ace couldn't be prouder than to know that "Miguel's butthole" will now be a site meme.
Posted by: Cruader at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (ewSN2) 238
But, did the husband know? Maybe he didn't. Maybe the wife was pissed at hubby and paid the tranny to nail him in the keister while he was asleep. He woke up with a guy's dick up his ass, had a heart attack, and died. -- Ya know, THIS makes sense. If it was real. And I have my doubts. Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (FkAXz) 239
he should be called Christopher Slummer. he got roles in classics like The Man Who Would Be King and then goes off to appear in SF crap like Starcrash
not that I am complaining. he was a fine ham in Star Trek 6, quoting Shakespeare at Shatner. Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at April 19, 2017 04:26 PM (SnZH4) Having someone who can act and has charisma does elevate even crappy material. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (zsHGH) 240
>>Everyone in this unhinged modern society of ours all act like each
lunatic's sexual fetish is the central significant factor worth noting, discussing, identifying and celebrating -- when in fact the sexual aspect of their mental disorder is in reality a side issue ("comorbidity" in medical-talk), not the core issue. Usually, it is an indication that the person is just plain "crazy" (in non-medical talk). Well said, zombie! I'd just tired of one's sexual preferences being treated as a core trait/identity. Why must your preference for X in the bedroom be your defining feature? I've been on the side of 'live and let live' except that it's not even that's it's now part of the conversation, it is the *center* of the conversation. I don't care how you get your kicks (provided it's legal), and I'd really rather not know. Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (NOIQH) 241
Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (DQ4Fv
My ex wife told me after we were married her sexual fantasy was to shit on my chest and fuck other dudes making me a cuck. I told her to go fuck herself and no. I refused to have sex with her after that. I filed the divorce papers for that reason and many many more. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (2qHjF) 242
Four Horsemynz of the Apocalypse
Posted by: wooga at April 19, 2017 04:35 PM (KzDOU) Those are not horses. Those are trans-giraffes. H8r! Posted by: Species is a social construct at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (rUIbB) 243
Yeah, I think it's fake, if only because I don't see a wife showing her face on a TV show after all that.
The tranny, sure, because what better way to stick it to Daddy? Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (oVJmc) 244
232 Why is she/he/it upset about a broken dick if it's going to get cut off anyway?
she/he/it could never commit to anything in life. Posted by: USNtakim at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (hMqvx) 245
And then there is this...
http://nypost.com/2017/04/19/incredibly-loud-sex-interrupts-florida-tennis-match/ Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (B+qrE) 246
Jennifer, who is transgender and still has her male genitalia, claimed defendant
Sylvia hired her to sleep with her husband, Miguel, on his 60th birthday Did the husband ask for this as his present? And if he did why didn't the wife just file the divorce papers instead? Honey, what you like for your birthday? A tranny....? What's the name of that lawyer Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (493sH) 247
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy -- Discount ticket Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (7ZVPa) 248
Here's the keymod I just went with:
http://bit.ly/2pDDDmf Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:34 PM (vZ0KM) At that price, it's almost just as cheap to by that upper. Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (GX63o) 249
The man died during the commission of a criminal act. Both the wife and the tranny should have charges brought against them.
Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (2qHjF) Assault with a dirty weapon?(turd)Burglary? Posted by: Our Country is Screwed Breaking and entering. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (vZ0KM) 250
When it comes to some of this sexual stuff, even the decadent Romans weren't this "imaginative."
Posted by: Semi-engaged Scroller at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (LQLeS) 251
The only error in this entire post is Ace claiming he and AoSHQ is 2nd-Tier blogging.
He is basically the moon to all the other bloggers stuck down below on little old earth. Maybe that's why everyone wants to nuke it. Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (72PAC) 252
In what universe does a wife hire a mentally ill transgender freak to have sex with her hubby on his 60th birthday? All three of them are sick in the head. Whatever happened to a nice meal at his favorite restaurant?
Posted by: Dan Akroyd at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (dargh) 253
Breaking and entering.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (vZ0KM) Not in that order. Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (8nWyX) 254
I read stories like this and I feel like the jerky father from Bachelor Party as he walks in on the donkey scene:
"My God, what the hell are you people doing in here." Posted by: Benji Carver at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (OD2ni) 255
#249 I think you mean entering and breaking?
Posted by: Semi-engaged Scroller at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (LQLeS) Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (dMRnN) 257
At that price, it's almost just as cheap to by that upper.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, I did. LOL. Whole kit and caboodle. Complete drop in. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (vZ0KM) 258
Alls I can tell is that all three people involved in this story are not the gender they pretend to be. This poat should be titled: When Playing Make-Believe Goes Wrong, Very Wrong Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (/MtvT) Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (NOIQH) 260
Which '70s proto-punk band was it that had a song that went
"My girl from Sodom She lets me spank her bottom"? I thought it was The Dictators, but dang, I can't find it online. Anyone know? Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (DQ4Fv) 261
I like to do doggy style but I make sure the dog is in the room watching me. I like to make eye contact with him so he understands that I am the alpha and don't even think about criticizing my technique. If I ever see him bust out and nut on the neighborhood bitchez' tails I'll know he's been taking notes.
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (ZMe1w) 262
Harvey Mudd College?
Aren't they 'The Fighting Mudbugs', or something? Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (QM5S2) Isn't that either the hardest or the second hardest college to get into? The other one is a mining school. Colorado School of Mines maybe? Posted by: alexthechick - rrraaawwwrrr at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (mf5HN) Posted by: ghbucky at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (D2q91) 264
I did. LOL. Whole kit and caboodle.
Complete drop in. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (vZ0KM) I have a 20" with gas issues. It's getting an adjustable block and handguard. Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (GX63o) 265
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (4Luun)
Actually, that sounds entirely plausible while I'm very much hoping that the topic of the post is completely fictional. We have reached peak media malpractice if the freaking Guardian is reporting more truthfully than US papers. It's not like they have any more love for Trump than US papers have. Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (sEDyY) 266
There used to be a time in life where a guy could get black out drunk, wake up in a strangers bed the next morning and be 99.998% sure that he had gone home with a woman could have been uglier than a male wolverine, but nonetheless a woman...these days I feel like you're talking a 50/50 chance if you were to look over your shoulder at the trouble you've gotten yourself into the next morning.
Posted by: H Badger at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (n/0Nw) 267
"Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better."
- Albert Einstein Bullshit. Nature is confusing and trying to kill us all. Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (B+qrE) 268
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy ----- Mississippi Slider. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (8b+oT) 269
The only way for this story to get more weird is if Jennifer claimed to be trans-tyrannosaur and Miguel was really a sauropod trapped in a human body.
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (uJ/du) 270
Sure, the beans depreciated, but they were Magic Beans.
Posted by: Tom Servo at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (KeRkT) 271
Still has his/her dick? Must be a tranny in training.
Posted by: Semi-engaged Scroller at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (LQLeS) 272
uh oh
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (uJ/du) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (/MtvT) 274
Congratulations on your "that's what xhe said" deployment. Top comedy right there.
Posted by: Chip at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (KXQr+) 275
Well that's one way to go...
Posted by: David Carradine at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (DpOmP) Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (493sH) 277
Barry & I had sex in a rickshaw. On a cobblestone street. He stuttered more than ever!
Posted by: Reggie Love at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (bc2Lc) 278
Tranny with training bewbs?
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (uJ/du) Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (qJhUV) 280
"262 Harvey Mudd College?
Aren't they 'The Fighting Mudbugs', or something? Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:38 PM (QM5S2)" Parking is in the rear. Posted by: Benji Carver at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (OD2ni) 281
The mile high club on Greyhound is called A Rhode Islander, if you do it in the bathroom it's called a Jersey.
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (6Ll1u) 282
wouldn't out be simpler if they just had sex with animals?
Posted by: musical jolly chimp at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM (WTSFk) 283
Holy shit.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2017 04:47 PM (89T5c) 284
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy "Sitting in the rear seats after midnight?" Too wordy? Well, it's true. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 04:47 PM (zsHGH) 285
I think I'm reading words written in English but then again I'm not entirely sure.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2017 04:47 PM (IqV8l) 286
I would believe the Harcourt Fenton Mudd College for Financial Security more so...
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:47 PM (uJ/du) Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:48 PM (oVJmc) 288
233 The man died during the commission of a criminal act. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:37 PM (2qHjF) Is "the act", in question, illegal in Florida? Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 04:41 PM (EoAgi) Yes. It's protestation and solicitation. Only Nevada is it legal in the States as far as I know. She dumb tranny prostitute admitted to getting paid by the wife to fuck her husband in the ass. Obviously the tranny was soliciting the offer to people. They did not pay for time and whatever happens occurs between to consenting adults. The idiot says the wife paid him to fuck his husband. That is a crime. A man is dead. Both need charges brought against them. I say an autopsy needs to be performed. He may have had known heart problems and was drugged. This needs to be investigated. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:48 PM (2qHjF) 289
My ex wife told me after we were married her sexual fantasy was to shit on my chest and fuck other dudes making me a cuck. I told her to go fuck herself and no. I refused to have sex with her after that. I filed the divorce papers for that reason and many many more.
Posted by: Widespread Pepe Smart move on your part! I mean, if she refused to torture you with a branding iron while shitting on your chest, she was not fulfilling her wifely duties! Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:48 PM (DQ4Fv) 290
Is "proud" the word we are going with here?
Posted by: gapoz at April 19, 2017 04:48 PM (thyJJ) 291
Honey, what you like for your birthday? A tranny....? What's the name of that lawyer
Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 19, 2017 04:42 PM (493sH) Maybe the wife thought she was hiring a female. Posted by: Dan Akroyd at April 19, 2017 04:48 PM (dargh) 292
I'm okay with the concept that the universe is insane.
I'm okay with the concept that the universe is expanding. I'm NOT okay with the implication that the universe is insane AND expanding. Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 04:49 PM (yL25O) 293
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy ----- Rode Crew. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:49 PM (8b+oT) 294
266
There used to be a time in life where a guy could get black out drunk, wake up in a strangers bed the next morning and be 99.998% sure that he had gone home with a woman could have been uglier than a male wolverine, but nonetheless a woman...these days I feel like you're talking a 50/50 chance if you were to look over your shoulder at the trouble you've gotten yourself into the next morning. Posted by: H Badger at April 19, 2017 04:45 PM (n/0Nw) First clue when you wake up -- is your arse sore? Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 04:49 PM (jxbfJ) 295
174
"Harvey Mudd College has been roiled by a self-study, informally titled the Wabash report, that referred to some anonymous faculty declaring that efforts to promote diversity in the student body had lowered the quality of the school. Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 04:30 PM (GgzGa) Oh, dear. I don't feel so good... Posted by: The Narrative at April 19, 2017 04:49 PM (xjiRE) 296
SMOD 2020
No, Not Really, I Just Like To Give False Hope Then Dash It Posted by: Brother Cavil, keeper of the Deplorable Unicode Character at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (9krrF) 297
I saw Miguel's Butthole Open for Los Lobos back in 98!
Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (ti1Hf) 298
293 Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy ----- Rode Crew. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:49 PM (8b+oT) Wouldn't passengers on a Greyhound to Denver be able to join the mile high club? Posted by: Northernlurker at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (hJrjt) 299
$16,000 is pretty cheap for having somone AssAssinated.
Posted by: irright at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (pMGkg) Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (ZMe1w) 301
284 Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy Rock Bottom. Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (yL25O) Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (EoAgi) 303
Or was this a rejected script for Fawlty Towers???
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (uJ/du) 304
I'm with Lizzy. No way in hell I want to know what you do in your bedroom or on your own time.
Posted by: Infidel at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (uKRys) 305
OT: Judicial Watch has sued State Department RE: US tax dollars given to Soros Open Society group in Macedonia.
Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (FkAXz) 306
"Harvey Mudd College has been roiled by a self-study, informally titled the Wabash report, that referred to some anonymous faculty declaring that efforts to promote diversity in the student body had lowered the quality of the school. Norman, please coordinate. Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (oVJmc) 307
Isn't that either the hardest or the second hardest college to get into?
The other one is a mining school. Colorado School of Mines maybe? Posted by: alexthechick Easier the deeper you can bore. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (vZ0KM) Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (oVJmc) 309
Artemus and I were always after Miguelito's butt.
Posted by: James West at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (IqV8l) 310
297 I saw Miguel's Butthole Open for Los Lobos back in 98! Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2017 04:50 PM (ti1Hf) You do have varied tastes, don't you? Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (voOPb) Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:51 PM (DQ4Fv) 312
252 In what universe does a wife hire a mentally ill transgender freak to have sex with her hubby on his 60th birthday? All three of them are sick in the head. Whatever happened to a nice meal at his favorite restaurant?
Posted by: Dan Akroyd at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (dargh) Maybe he likes to eat at the Y. Posted by: Northernlurker at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (hJrjt) 313
I am glad it is made up but I still don't understand the story. So Jen The Dude was doing Miguel McBrokenHeart up the cornhole and Jen's dick fell off which It didn't want to be there anyway? Is that what you guys read? Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (ODxAs) 314
Posted by: Widespread Pepe
You got off easy. Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer. Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (oR5ks) 315
Small Change is one of Tom Waits' best albums, but Bad Liver and a Broken Penis was a pretty disappointing track.
Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (8nWyX) 316
Your ass is sore when I make a visit.
Posted by: The Ether Bunny at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (89T5c) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (/MtvT) 318
Well that's one way to go...
Posted by: David Carradine at April 19, 2017 04:46 PM..........Word. Posted by: Aarron Hernandez at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (WSWlB) 319
Miguel not only learned English from a phrase book, butt sex also...
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (uJ/du) 320
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy Rock Bottom. THREADWINNER!! Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:53 PM (vZ0KM) 321
No way in hell I want to know what you do in your bedroom or on your own time.
Never been to the ONT, huh? Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:53 PM (B+qrE) 322
Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer.
I think you have to pay extra for that. Posted by: Cruader at April 19, 2017 04:53 PM (ewSN2) Posted by: The EPA at April 19, 2017 04:53 PM (oVJmc) 324
Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer.
Kinky. Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (B+qrE) 325
Wouldn't passengers on a Greyhound to Denver be able to join the mile high club?
Posted by: Northernlurker ----- That's called a Mountin' Pass. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (8b+oT) 326
Geez and all I got (thankfully) was a cordless drill.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (WSWlB) 327
252 In what universe does a wife hire a mentally ill transgender freak to have sex with her hubby on his 60th birthday? All three of them are sick in the head. Whatever happened to a nice meal at his favorite restaurant?
Posted by: Dan Akroyd at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (dargh) Something tells me there was E.D. meds involved Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (voOPb) 328
Seriously? There's a school to study to become a mime?
All of the courses are conducted online--there are no lectures. Posted by: Cruader at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (ewSN2) 329
Of course, because a Mine is a terrible thing to waste.
Posted by: The EPA at April 19, 2017 04:53 PM (oVJmc) Rivers though? Dime a dozen. Now if you'll excuse me, the hallway floor is calling. Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (8nWyX) 330
Ah, the ONT. I was still just a lurker for the infamous ONT.
Posted by: Infidel at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (uKRys) 331
>>>Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer.
Which way was she facing? What was she wearing? Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 04:54 PM (ZMe1w) 332
314 Posted by: Widespread Pepe You got off easy. Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer. Posted by: Roland THTG at April 19, 2017 04:52 PM (oR5ks) I wish that had happened to me. Over 3 year court battle. Alienation case. Almost 200 grand spent to just be a dad in my children's lives. No I'm living a nightmare. Posted by: Widespread Pepe, MGTOW at April 19, 2017 04:55 PM (2qHjF) 333
I was going with "fake story" based on ace's recounting alone.
Then I clicked through. I'm not even persuaded that that girl is a tranny or ever had a penis. Posted by: Bandersnatch at April 19, 2017 04:55 PM (gIRsn) 334
Buddy of mine woke up with his wife sitting on his chest, beating him with a claw hammer.
Could have been worse. At least he regained consciousness. Posted by: Brother Cavil, keeper of the Deplorable Unicode Character at April 19, 2017 04:55 PM (9krrF) 335
OK, so the Mentors song actually goes,
"My woman from Sodom, she lets me in her bottom." But that's the only part of the lyrics online! Weird - -every song in history has its full lyrics online somewhere, except this one. No fair! Anyway, it would have been applicable to this thread. The Mentors always are applicable. Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 04:55 PM (DQ4Fv) 336
from last thread, ran across this a comprehensive line-up article, with Updated letter from Rupert Murdoch on O'Reilly exit at the end http://ijr.com/2017/04/851958-new-fox-news-evening-line/ Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 19, 2017 04:55 PM (dMRnN) 337
Upside to this is it makes a guy posting anonymously on the Internet as 'Weasel' seem pretty normal by comparison.
Posted by: Weasel at April 19, 2017 04:56 PM (Sfs6o) 338
Reagan really should have just pressed the red button back in the eighties. We are lost.
Posted by: Sharkman at April 19, 2017 04:56 PM (9hM9o) 339
Assault with a dirty weapon?(turd)Burglary?
Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 04:40 PM (jxbfJ) ROFL, I can't help it, I'm still laughing! Posted by: Tom Servo at April 19, 2017 04:56 PM (KeRkT) Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (/MtvT) 341
I guess that completely depends if in that blackout you insisted on only being a pitcher...
Posted by: H Badger at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (n/0Nw) 342
I'm proud to be alive in this most insane of times.
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (tHwdc) 343
O'Reilly is nothing! Many women took the Mudd Run!
Posted by: Roger Mudd at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (bc2Lc) 344
In what universe does a wife hire a mentally ill transgender freak to have sex with her hubby on his 60th birthday? All three of them are sick in the head. Whatever happened to a nice meal at his favorite restaurant? Posted by: Dan Akroyd at April 19, 2017 04:43 PM (dargh) All he wanted for his birthday was a big sausage served to him by a pretty girl! Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (S2V6F) 345
I'm not sure what bothers me more - not being able to follow what happened, or understanding what happened.
Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (2VN2E) 346
Also, try to use: "No shit, Sherlock!" Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (/MtvT) Posted by: 80's music fan at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (4NlII) 348
Nyah Weasel?
Should see it from Uni and my POVs. How are we considered freaks when humans are doing this kind of stuff? Yuck. The Universe is totes unfair. Posted by: Anna Puma at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (uJ/du) 349
Mentors. The stale maker.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2017 04:57 PM (IqV8l) 350
Threads like this exhaust me.
Posted by: The Letter X at April 19, 2017 04:58 PM (VFhMt) 351
Upside to this is it makes a guy posting anonymously on the Internet as 'Weasel' seem pretty normal by comparison.
Posted by: Weasel at April 19, 2017 04:56 PM (Sfs6o) You are pretty normal by comparison. Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at April 19, 2017 04:58 PM (tHwdc) 352
is breaking a penis like breaking a heart?
Posted by: Quivering Snowflake at April 19, 2017 04:58 PM (0+2tr) 353
Is there a "Mile High Club" for Greyhound bus? What's it called?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy Low Life Club? Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (loJzf) 354
Isn't that either the hardest or the second hardest college to get into?
The other one is a mining school. Colorado School of Mines maybe? Posted by: alexthechick - rrraaawwwrrr at April 19, 2017 04:44 PM (mf5HN) I think they liked to brag that people dropped out because they couldn't hack it and went to MIT instead. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (S2V6F) 355
NOBODY AT FOX WILL MENTION THE O'REILLY FIRING. IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY ALL NOW MUST PLEASURE THE MURDOCH BROS DICKS.
Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (X+rUO) 356
All he wanted for his birthday was a big sausage served to him by a pretty girl!
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile Dinner at Hoffbrau would have been cheaper. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (vZ0KM) 357
Gotta say, I wouldn't mind getting jury duty for a case like this. It could be a lotta laughs.
Does the judge get mad at jurors if they joke around or laugh right out loud during the testimony? Posted by: nerdygirl at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (+lVUW) 358
This may be the appropriate thread to tell you about my daughter who is not particularly crazy by contemporary young adult standards. She got a prescription from her doctor for her emotional support cat. Then she went to a particular website and got an official-looking emotional support cat license with her picture and her cat's picture. I don't know how well it will work when she wants to take her cat places since she just got it and has used it only once, to get her landlord to let her have a cat.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doctor of Thinkology at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (Nwg0u) 359
Could've been a game of pin the tail on donkey that went horribly wrong Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (lKyWE) 360
I've had enough internet for today, thanks.
Posted by: Clutch Cargo at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (RHEDC) 361
I hope I get this case. Posted by: Judge Judy at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (ZO497) 362
is breaking a penis like breaking a heart?
Posted by: Quivering Snowflake ----- More like breaking wind. Underwater. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (8b+oT) Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (vS/L/) Posted by: The Ether Bunny at April 19, 2017 05:01 PM (89T5c) 365
SURPRISE!!!
Posted by: Butt Fuckin' Tranny at April 19, 2017 05:01 PM (8b+oT) 366
Isn't Breaking Penis the pron version of Breaking Bad?
Posted by: Northernlurker at April 19, 2017 05:01 PM (hJrjt) 367
Could've been a game of pin the tail on donkey that went horribly wrong
Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic Stick It To The Jackass? Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 05:02 PM (vZ0KM) Posted by: Greyhound at April 19, 2017 05:02 PM (ZO497) 369
Shit. Off sock!
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2017 05:02 PM (89T5c) 370
Emotional support cats only pretend to provide emotional support.
They're really plotting your bloody demise like all other cats. Posted by: Bandersnatch at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (gIRsn) 371
Isn't that either the hardest or the second hardest college to get into?
The other one is a mining school. Colorado School of Mines maybe? Posted by: alexthechick Colorado School of Mimes is harder. No one has been able to submit an actual written application. Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (loJzf) 372
I lead a dull life.
Posted by: washrivergal at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (Ivjge) Posted by: ibguy at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (vUcdz) 374
I hate fucking mimes. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (/MtvT) 375
"Miguel's wife has secretly switched his coffee with a big-dicked tranny. Let's see if he notices..."
AAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (ZMe1w) 376
I can't even figure this out.
Whose wife was it? Did she know it was really a he? Generally, a dick in the ass is a dead giveaway. Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 05:03 PM (vZ0KM) 377
358 This may be the appropriate thread to tell you about my daughter who is not particularly crazy by contemporary young adult standards. She got a prescription from her doctor for her emotional support cat. Then she went to a particular website and got an official-looking emotional support cat license with her picture and her cat's picture. I don't know how well it will work when she wants to take her cat places since she just got it and has used it only once, to get her landlord to let her have a cat.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doctor of Thinkology at April 19, 2017 04:59 PM (Nwg0u) Was that the Ministry of Housinge website? Posted by: rickl at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (xjiRE) 378
A tie. Just ask for a tie.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (oVJmc) 379
I've had enough internet for today, thanks.
Posted by: Clutch Cargo ---------- Oh, we're only getting started. Posted by: Clickbaits-R-Us at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (ZO497) Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (lcylG) 381
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe.
Posted by: Jasper Perino at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (bc2Lc) 382
Whose wife was it? Did she know it was really a he?
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at April 19, 2017 05:00 PM (vS/L/) Wife X paid tranny Y to bang husband Z. Z died while being mounted by Y, who suffered a broken dick in the process. Y is now suing X. My guess is that husband always had a fetish for trannies, and wife either a) had a fetish of her own for the idea of her hubby having sex with someone else, or b) was willing to indulge it since she figured it was a safe bet that he wouldn't run off. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (S2V6F) 383
Mimes are even worse than clowns. Nobody gives a shit about your imaginary box. Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (/MtvT) 384
Generally, a dick in the ass is a dead giveaway.
Posted by: rickb223 --- Okay, let's focus on the word 'dead'... Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (ZO497) Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (lcylG) 386
Did this happen before or after cake?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (ZMe1w) 387
No, I said I need a new tranny, but the dealership will ass rape me! WTF is this?
Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (kTF2Z) 388
or b) was willing to indulge it since she figured it was a safe bet that he wouldn't run off.
I'd say that's even more definite now. Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (oVJmc) 389
Jennifer and Miguel, sittin in a tree,,b-u-t--t-f-u-c-k-i-n-g...
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (WSWlB) 390
Posted by: The Ether Bunny at April 19, 2017 05:01 PM (89T5c)
True, dat. I was just wondering if that's what gave poor Miguel the heart attack, and his family could counter-sue! Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (vS/L/) 391
Nood.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (89T5c) 392
Nobody gives a shit about your imaginary box.
Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 05:04 PM (/MtvT) *single tear rolls down cheek* Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (8nWyX) 393
Wife X paid tranny Y to bang husband Z. Z died while being mounted by Y, who suffered a broken dick in the process. Y is now suing X.
----------- This has the substance of a Common Core word problem. Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (ZO497) 394
Did this happen before or after cake?
Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (ZMe1w) After. The tranny popped out of the cake. That was one weird ass birthday party. Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at April 19, 2017 05:05 PM (S2V6F) 395
FUCK!!!
picked a bad day to be busy today. This is the thread I've been waiting my whole life for. FUCK!!!! Posted by: Rick in SK at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (FZYNt) Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (oVJmc) 397
Happy birthday... to... you...
Posted by: Marilyn Monroe, taking her vitamins at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (8b+oT) 398
This is hilarious. The tranny looks exactly exactly like Steven Crowder in a bad wig. If the political comedy gig doesn't work out, tranny sex dispenser appears to be a wide open field for him in Old Blighty. Posted by: naturalfake at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (NyJwR) 399
I need an emotional support cat for my cattle herding beaver.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (IqV8l) 400
"So why am I posting this?"
Because it gave you a chance to let your sense of humor out for a minute. That was funny as fuck, and I wish you had more chances to just laugh your ass off at the human cowpies that surround us. Took me back to Ace 2004. Posted by: rickinstl at April 19, 2017 05:07 PM (hGXt7) 401
Psst. There aren't any real bones there.
Wait a minute, you're expecting some sort of tethering to reality when the subject being discussed is a he that claimed to be a she was buggering Miguel's butthole because Miguel's wife paid the he claiming to be a she to do so? Posted by: Cruader at April 19, 2017 05:07 PM (ewSN2) 402
Miguel's celebrating turning 60 years old
He wants tranny, his wife is told She hires Jennifer, self identifying as a xhe They negotiate pricing cause this ain't free Jennifer pokes old Miguel with her pole Slapping ass and drilling the squeak hole Miguel grunts and drops on the bed Heart attack kills him deader than dead Jennifer the tranny is now in a tight spot Xhe's dick is stuck and xhe is distraught Wife gets sued for being such a fool For xhe had broken her tool $16 grand - what a farce for putting a dick up an arse Posted by: A poet at April 19, 2017 05:07 PM (jxbfJ) Posted by: Off the reservation at April 19, 2017 05:07 PM (EoAgi) 404
I have an emotional support rhinoceros. Wherever I go, he goes. I got a note from my head-shrinker, so you can't turn me away!
So, now that that's cleared up, my rhino wants the kosher vegetarian meal, an extra pillow, and a window seat. Posted by: zombie at April 19, 2017 05:08 PM (DQ4Fv) 405
397
Happy birthday... to... you... Posted by: Marilyn Monroe, taking her vitamins at April 19, 2017 05:06 PM (8b+oT) If he only had his candle blown, none of this would have happened. Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at April 19, 2017 05:08 PM (jxbfJ) 406
FUCK!!!
picked a bad day to be busy today. This is the thread I've been waiting my whole life for. FUCK!!!! Posted by: Rick in SK *snort Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 05:08 PM (vZ0KM) 407
That was one weird ass birthday party.
Actually, I was probably the only thing normal about that birthday party. Posted by: Miguel's butthole at April 19, 2017 05:09 PM (ewSN2) 408
I thought that they wanted a baby. Buggering Miguel's butthole ain't gonna get it done.
Oh. No baby. No brains. No morals. no shit. Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2017 05:09 PM (lcylG) 409
Nood
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 05:11 PM (vZ0KM) 410
You'll always be the first rate of the second-tier bloggers in my book, Ace!
Posted by: Rhubarb Ranch at April 19, 2017 05:12 PM (trcbu) 411
I get that it's fake, but how sick do you have to be to make this up?
- And Hollywood TV writers are threatening to strike just as if they never heard H1b visas. Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doctor of Thinkology at April 19, 2017 05:16 PM (Nwg0u) 412
>>>352 is breaking a penis like breaking a heart?
I think if a woman breaks a man's penis during vigorous sex, she has the potential to later break his heart, if she wants. Posted by: ace at April 19, 2017 05:17 PM (8rNrN) Posted by: Paolo the Wifef***er at April 19, 2017 05:18 PM (8rNrN) 414
It's like Poe's Law meets Rule 34.
Posted by: Toad-O at April 19, 2017 05:25 PM (cct0t) 415
If my wife offered me this
I can't imagine being asked "You want a ladyboy up your ass for your birthday?" Posted by: JEM at April 19, 2017 05:27 PM (TppKb) 416
You can't break it. It works by hydraulics, not bone.
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at April 19, 2017 05:35 PM (YfK5r) 417
Hollywood wives wanted me to perform this type of thing on their husbands for their birthdays.
Posted by: Caitlin Jenner before she got male genitals removed. at April 19, 2017 05:53 PM (ndGCC) 418
Natural Conservatives. We should bring more in who consume this sort of quality entertainment.
Posted by: Schaeffer at April 19, 2017 05:59 PM (6QGU9) 419
Now, THAT's workplace violence.
Posted by: Texpunk at April 19, 2017 06:01 PM (0/psn) 420
So now you're just posting slashfic? I gave up reading the OP halfway through when I started throwing up a little in my mouth.
Posted by: Monty James at April 19, 2017 06:03 PM (gKOMX) 421
Miguel had his slot filled. It didn't end too well. Well, it ended I guess, just not well.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2017 06:21 PM (WSWlB) 422
241 --
So you were ok with her shitting on your chest? It was the dudes that "queered the deal"? Or vice versa? Such a weird but funny thread... Posted by: JM&J at April 19, 2017 06:24 PM (1HsK/) 423
I wouldn't wish any of this on a broke dick dog.
Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2017 06:40 PM (TNQMS) 424
Only the first time you were proud of your blogging?
Do you not recall the finest piece of food blogging to grace the internet? http://ace.mu.nu/archives/343109.php Posted by: Sweet Lou at April 19, 2017 06:54 PM (4DuI9) 425
Xhe was warned Xhe was given a explanation. Neverthepenis, xhe persisted.
Posted by: Rgallegos at April 19, 2017 07:02 PM (YfTJt) Posted by: jukin Former Republican at April 19, 2017 07:04 PM (n+CJe) 427
I missed this thread because of a trip to the dentist
Posted by: Skip at April 19, 2017 07:55 PM (Ot7+c) 428
"As far as I know, this is the world's first deployment of "That's what xhe said."
For the first time in my adult life I'm proud of being a second-tier blogger." The best little military blog on the web, Ace. We xalute you, xir! Posted by: The Gipper Lives at April 19, 2017 08:23 PM (Ndje9) 429
Well okay.
Posted by: SOASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at April 19, 2017 08:52 PM (XfJV2) 430
I am just barely old enough to remember "Candid Camera," where a nutty stunt would ensnare some hapless passerby, and just when the person was hopelessly confused, the host would jump out and say "Smile--you're on Candid Camera!"
I think all this lunacy will prove to be a revival of "Candid Camera." Posted by: Pogonip at April 19, 2017 09:51 PM (kguml) 431
There is a Reddit thread from 2014 referencing "r/TumblrInAction" entitled "There's a lot to take in here" with the line "That's what xhe said" in the comments.
reddit dot com slash r slash TumblrInAction slash comments/2bqlrp/theres_a_lot_to_take_in_here/ Don't kill the messenger! Even if it was my joke from, uh, 2013, that they stole from me! Posted by: Amy Schumer, getting B& at April 20, 2017 11:40 AM (wx6iv) Processing 0.05, elapsed 0.0654 seconds. |
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