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Justice Department to Apple: We Cracked Your Phone, Dudes

They're withdrawing their application to compel Apple to aid them in cracking the uncrackable iPhone, because they've now cracked it.

The Justice Department is expected to withdraw from its legal action against Apple, as soon as today, as an outside method to bypass the locking function of a San Bernardino terrorist’s phone has proved successful, a federal law enforcement official said Monday.

The official, who is not authorized to comment publicly, said the method brought to the FBI earlier this month by an unidentified entity allows investigators to crack the security function without erasing contents of the iPhone used by Syed Farook....

It has been claimed that an Israeli firm named Cellebrite demonstrated to the FBI that it was possible to crack the phone's security, but Cellebrite is refusing comment.

I had an idea. Not a good idea, but an idea. I thought maybe the FBI cooked up this Miracle Solution without actually having a solution -- that is, they're just pretending they've cracked the phone -- in order to make terrorists think the iPhone is insecure and thus steer them towards other models. Indeed, to poison the phone's reputation even further, they've leaked it that a bunch of Zionists will be riffling through terrorist emails.

But I don't think that's what happened. I think someone actually just cracked the iPhone's security.

Posted by: Ace at 07:00 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st now?

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 06:57 PM (fizMZ)

2 Well Apple is not so big now are they?

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 06:59 PM (fizMZ)

3 I envision a SWAT member with a hatchet: "I cracked it open!"

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at March 28, 2016 06:59 PM (Qvgg/)

4 Before 10th

Posted by: AD at March 28, 2016 06:59 PM (r90Yw)

5 *deletes wife pics off iphone*

Posted by: EC at March 28, 2016 07:00 PM (j8YpL)

6 "I don't want no juice in my stuff"

That's what we should let them think, true or not.

Posted by: West at March 28, 2016 07:00 PM (HAUuI)

7 The Feds cracked it by throwing it at my head numerous times.

Posted by: Scott Sterling at March 28, 2016 07:00 PM (aOqpx)

8 I've cracked several

Posted by: NCKate at March 28, 2016 07:00 PM (BSM4p)

9 Well there goes Apples noisy sales pitch. I am getting sick of that mouth ass anyway.

Posted by: Pat at March 28, 2016 07:01 PM (4MSOz)

10 ALrighty!


Heh, I do like the idea of this being a rumor to scare terrorists from using iPhones. Evil shape-shifting, phone cracking jooos FTW!

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:01 PM (NOIQH)

11 Oooooooo-WEE Ace gets quite a response from Western Rifle Shooters: http://tinyurl.com/zm8ulllstill digesting it...

Posted by: MAx at March 28, 2016 07:01 PM (LAliD)

12 Maybe the FBI finds valuable time sensitive info that is no longer valuable bc of the sob Apple ceo. If so, I want to see his head on the sharp end of a pike.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 07:02 PM (iQIUe)

13 That's: http://tinyurl.com/zm8ulll

Posted by: MAx at March 28, 2016 07:02 PM (LAliD)

14 So rather than Apple suffering the reputational hit of working with the Feds to compromise the security of their product ...

They suffer the reputational hit of having their product cracked by 3rd parties.

Better? Worse? The Real Story? *shrug*

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:02 PM (uURQL)

15 In retrospect, Apple probably would have been smarter to have played ball with the FBI. Now they have to admit their hot shit security and all that.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:02 PM (/tuJf)

16 IIt has been claimed that an Israeli firm....demonstrated....possible to crack the phone's security

Oh, those crafty, crafty Joos. Probably poisoned my well, too.

Posted by: pep at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (LAe3v)

17 From the dead thread, because I like the meme.

I do like the Facebook meme that I have been seeing which goes:

muslims: forget about the 72 virgins in heaven thing because Bowie and Lemmy are dead, so there are no virgins left there anymore

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (kXoT0)

18 When companies go SJW, they change their priorities; and the little things like "quality assurance", "safety", and "security" are the first to go.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (6FqZa)

19 *deletes wife pics off iphone*


Don't worry, they're in the cloud and also archived in Utah.

Posted by: Bill from NSA (Bob's on break) at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (1xUj/)

20 Tim Cook is currently curled up in a fetal position, crying.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (kBIIG)

21 I could have cracked that phone if I had the use of both of my arms.

Posted by: Michelle Fields at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (22uju)

22 I think this was a bad move on Israel's part, they just revealed an intelligence secret.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (54fi8)

23 Poor dave....

Posted by: My Cousin Turk at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (LYCUN)

24 The Feds cracked it by throwing it at my head numerous times.
Posted by: Scott Sterling at March 28, 2016 07:00 PM (aOqpx)


AMAZING PLAY BY STERRRRRRLINGGGGG!

*cheers*

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (uURQL)

25 Joos. Is there anything they can't do?

Posted by: EC at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (j8YpL)

26 ...I think the NSA has a backdoor, and either the NSA facilitated this and/or someone found a way to exploit the NSA backdoor.

My theory at least.

This was all about setting up the legal precedence that local cops can get a warrant and force someone (apple) to decrypt their encryptions.

iMessage and whatsapp are next.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (AkOaV)

27 Occams razor. Its far more likely that the Israeli security firm figured out how to bypass the security feature.

Posted by: JeffreyL at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (mXv3y)

28 Fortunately for Apple, I'm sure a foreign company that cracked the IPhone would only work with the U.S. government.

Posted by: AD at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (r90Yw)

29 Oh, those crafty, crafty Joos. Probably poisoned my well, too.


Posted by: pep


You know, if I had a well. I don't because the Joos dried up my lands.

Posted by: pep at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (LAe3v)

30 Occams razor. Its far more likely that the Israeli security firm figured out how to bypass the security feature.
Posted by: JeffreyL at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (mXv3y)


It is not a question of If your security will be compromised. It is a question of When.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (uURQL)

31 "The official, who is not authorized to comment publicly, said"

Posted by: Simon Simmons at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (KeWZE)

32 20 Tim Cook is currently curled up in a fetal position, crying.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (kBIIG)

The phone in question was a 5c I believe. They've gotten much more encrypted and unbreakable since then.

In theory.

But, again -- I highly suspect that the NSA has a back door.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (AkOaV)

33 >>Better? Worse? The Real Story? *shrug*

Yeah, I was on team no one. I'm OK with grand-standing Apple getting shamed even if I'm not happy about the possibility of this assisting the feds in skipping having to get subpoenas before breaking into a phone.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:05 PM (NOIQH)

34 Will Tim Cook call the Justice Department liars?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 07:05 PM (FkBIv)

35 Tim Cook is currently curled up in a fetal position, crying.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (kBIIG)

Oh, please dear everything, I hope so. He's the reason I own no Apple products.

If his gayness is so damned important to him why does he have zero problems with the countries throwing gay men off the tops of buildings in the name of their religion.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:05 PM (kXoT0)

36 Fine with me.
AFAIC, Apple can go to hell.

It's not that I don't appreciate their arguments on this matter. I just hate them posturing as principled champions of freedom and privacy when I know they'll happily cooperate with dictators from Beijing to Havana.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at March 28, 2016 07:05 PM (T/5A0)

37 I was questioning a few weeks ago when this brouhaha was started that I heard the phone in question was owned by his employer which should have been the county, anyone know?

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (fizMZ)

38 The phone in question was a 5c I believe. They've gotten much more encrypted and unbreakable since then.



In theory.


Yeah, probably not as much as they think.

Posted by: Admiral Karl Doenitz at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (LAe3v)

39 Liz Warren is 1/2 Navajo Code Talker...

I'm not sayin'. I'm just sayin'.

Posted by: garrett at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (MvFEq)

40 I think this was a bad move on Israel's part, they just revealed an intelligence secret.

It's a private company. They'll look at it as free advertizing.

Posted by: AD at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (r90Yw)

41 I was questioning a few weeks ago when this brouhaha was started that I heard the phone in question was owned by his employer which should have been the county, anyone know?
Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (fizMZ)

The County owned the phone

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (mw8Dm)

42 Yeah, I was on team no one. I'm OK with grand-standing Apple getting shamed even if I'm not happy about the possibility of this assisting the feds in skipping having to get subpoenas before breaking into a phone.
Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:05 PM (NOIQH)

But here's the thing. once apple does this ONCE -- then every time there's some low level drug dealer or domestic violence situation or someone suspected of cheating on their taxes, or whatever ... the cops can get a warrant to force apple to do it again.

It was always about finding a way (that is admissible in court) to force companies to defeat their own encryption.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:07 PM (AkOaV)

43 I can't imagine it's that tough to crack an iPhone. With a couple million lines of computer code under my belt -- It's not bragging if you can do it.

In this case it's changing one word in high level code, knowing the result in low level machine language, then applying the fix. Not rocket science, computer science.

Not that I'm thrilled with the result. It's all been theatre.

Posted by: mega machines at March 28, 2016 07:07 PM (fbovC)

44 Password was probably 1-2-3-4.

Posted by: EC at March 28, 2016 07:07 PM (j8YpL)

45 It's a private company. They'll look at it as free advertizing.
Posted by: AD at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (r90Yw)

It's also a company that was already providing some services to the FBI

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:07 PM (mw8Dm)

46 The County owned the phone
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:06 PM (mw8Dm)

yes. The county owned the phone. The guy destroyed his PERSONAL iphone.

And the County was beyond fucking dumb to ignore best practices (which would be to install MDM software on *their* phone) and let employees have unfettered access to their work phones. No major company does that.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (AkOaV)

47 They've gotten much more encrypted and unbreakable since then.

All the crypto is in iOS. They don't have any dedicated hardware security features. They can't because all the hardware is manufactured off shore and sending the crypto overseas is an ITAR violation.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (kBIIG)

48 38
The phone in question was a 5c I believe. They've gotten much more encrypted and unbreakable since then.

In theory.


Yeah, probably not as much as they think.




Posted by: Admiral Karl Doenitz


Cry me a river, dude.

Posted by: Admiral Chuichi Nagumo at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (LAe3v)

49 Here's a story about an actual Muslim victim: a Muslim man was beated and stomped to death in Glasgow, by other muzzies who were outraged that he had wished Happy Easter to his Christian host nation.

http://moonbattery.com/?p=70385

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (df5V4)

50 But I don't think that's what happened. I think someone actually just cracked the iPhone's security.

We'll find out what the real story is in about a month when Shrillary emails the episode to her pedicurist.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (zc3Db)

51
Maigret Sets A Trap

Rowan Atkinson stars as the Parisian detective in the first of a new occasional run of dramas based on the novels of Georges Simenon. The summer of 1955 finds Paris in the grip of both sweltering heat and terror on the streets. Four women have been murdered in Montmartre, with no apparent connection between the victims. Chief Inspector Maigret comes under huge pressure from the public and his superiors to apprehend the killer before he can strike again.

===========
I'll let you know after I watch it.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (iQIUe)

52 Posted by: mega machines at March 28, 2016 07:07 PM (fbovC)

getting the fake apple certificate to force the upgrade is the hard part.

Which makes me think they found a way to bypass that... through a back door.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (AkOaV)

53 My conspiracy theory has been that the government (or someone it could easily hire) has been able to crack the phone's security all along, but the point of this exercise was to show everybody that it could strongarm Apple - and if they couldn't, then the next attack and its subsequent casualties would be on Apple.

Posted by: FireHorse at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (kQ5yx)

54 When companies go SJW, they change their priorities; and the little things like "quality assurance", "safety", and "security" are the first to go.
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (6FqZa)

It is not a question of If your security will be compromised. It is a question of When.
Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:04 PM (uURQL)

Programmers who consider themselves to be terribly precious also love to do things in their code that points out how wonderful they are like making the first letter of the lines of code in a routine spell their "name" or an obscene world. Leaving a back door for revenge purposes is also very common.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (kXoT0)

55 meh China hacked Apple's corporate office computers as weren't honoring their warranties for the people that were actually making the phones. Your security was sold long ago by bubba clinton.

Posted by: ryukyu at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (FuBZa)

56 >>But here's the thing. once apple does this ONCE -- then every time there's some low level drug dealer or domestic violence situation or someone suspected of cheating on their taxes, or whatever ... the cops can get a warrant to force apple to do it again.

What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

57 All the crypto is in iOS. They don't have any dedicated hardware security features. They can't because all the hardware is manufactured off shore and sending the crypto overseas is an ITAR violation.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (kBIIG)


Good point.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (uURQL)

58 There's always a tug of war between tech companies and hackers. Granted, hackers aren't exactly the types that would just go up to the FBI and say "hey, I'd like to help my government by telling you how to crack this phone," but I always figured there would be someone out there that could breach the "erase everything" failsafe. Then the tech companies will find out how it was done, patch that, and hackers will find a new way to crack it.

Posted by: broseidon king of the brocean at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (4/i9Y)

59
All the crypto is in iOS. They don't have any dedicated hardware security features. They can't because all the hardware is manufactured off shore and sending the crypto overseas is an ITAR violation.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (kBIIG)

No, they have a dedicated security module in the device as well.

But yes, the encryption itself is software-based. But it sits on separate hardware (since the iPhone 5 IIRC) inside the phone.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (AkOaV)

60 The whole thing is theatre.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (BTnAK)

61 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)


Exactly

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (mw8Dm)

62 So Ace, is the AOSHQ podcast no more?

Posted by: podcastfan at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (98IdR)

63 Programmers who consider themselves to be terribly precious also love to do things in their code that points out how wonderful they are like making the first letter of the lines of code in a routine spell their "name" or an obscene world. Leaving a back door for revenge purposes is also very common.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (kXoT0)


"1-800-FU1CKYO!!!!!" -- Barky

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (zc3Db)

64 Defense is always at best a delaying action in war and cell phone cracking.

Posted by: Meremortal, back at March 28, 2016 07:10 PM (3myMJ)

65 Password was probably 1-2-3-4.


Just like my ATM PIN. What a coincidence.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:11 PM (8ZskC)

66 "*deletes wife pics off iphone*"

I've seen something made to look like one of those MedicAlert wrist bracelets, except this one says "PLEASE DELETE MY BROWSER HISTORY".

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 07:11 PM (noWW6)

67 Apple thinks they will be able to prevent pirac by installing an iPatch.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 07:12 PM (NeFrd)

68 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

Because its the entirety of my life from banking to medical to private messages and emails to ... I mean, everything is in my phone. Everything.

And if I chose to "write" in "code" (like back in the day when people would write in code or invisible ink or whatever) no one can force ME to turn over the decryption to my code.

And I desire that kind of security on my smart phone.

Yes, even the best codes are breakable, but I am going to do everything I can to be as secure in my papers as possible. From any intrusion, regardless of the source.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:12 PM (AkOaV)

69 What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)


Apple convinced a judge that building the software to crack their product went beyond what was reasonable.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:12 PM (uURQL)

70 11 Oooooooo-WEE Ace gets quite a response from Western Rifle Shooters: http://tinyurl.com/zm8ulllstill digesting it...
Posted by: MAx at March 28, 2016 07:01 PM (LAliD)

Somebody over there is gonna pop a vein.

Posted by: West at March 28, 2016 07:13 PM (HAUuI)

71 A more likely explanation, Ace: a lot of the pushback to their demands pointed out that (a) they had a city employee change the password, so (b) either they could just ask him the new password, or obviously they could have him do it again. To save face though, they couldn't make a big scene for two weeks and then just pout and change the password. So the FBI probably cooked up this pretense that they had to hire secret consultants in the black arts to "crack" the phone, in order to hide the fact that they were too stupid to think of the password thing until they read about it from their critics.

Posted by: joeclark77 at March 28, 2016 07:13 PM (eE1A5)

72 Dear FBI,

I have strong, actionable intelligence that Irina Shayk, Kelly Brook, and Charlotte McKinney are involved in terrorism and terrorist activities. The evidence is on their iPhones, in the Photos app, under Selfies.

Yours,

EC

Posted by: EC at March 28, 2016 07:13 PM (j8YpL)

73 It's the equivalent of saying "you cannot have a lock on your front door or a chip in the key to your car in case the government wants to walk in to your house or hotwire your car."

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (AkOaV)

74 What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

Especially when you consider that cell phones are just extremely fancy 2 way radios dependent on towers to broadcast and re-broadcast the signals.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (kXoT0)

75 Feh, just as likely that the FBI is lying so they can back away from this. I never believed they had cause to think there was anything there, they were just using this to create a precedent.

Posted by: Vlad the Impaler, whittling away like mad at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (3Mimg)

76 Didn't the NSA have the ability to read everything on everyone's phones already? Was that bullshit? Or was the whole lawsuit thing bullshit to make the peasants think the govt actually follows its own laws?

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (0LHZx)

77 lines of code in a routine spell their "name" or an obscene world.


*****

An utterly apropos typo or autocorrect.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 07:15 PM (NeFrd)

78 Apple thinks they will be able to prevent pirac by installing an iPatch.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 07:12 PM (NeFrd)



Arrrgh, that be a foul bit 'o punnin', me heartie.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:15 PM (8ZskC)

79 I'm not getting involved in this fight again.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:15 PM (mw8Dm)

80 Especially when you consider that cell phones are just extremely fancy 2 way radios dependent on towers to broadcast and re-broadcast the signals.
Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (kXoT0)

Not really.

A smart phone is a computer. With memory. And the ability to work over wifi. Or without any connection to the outside world.

I do not want anyone to be able to access my call history, my text messages, my banking history, my health / car / life insurance information, my personal photo albums etc. etc. etc. unless I give them permission.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (AkOaV)

81 No, they have a dedicated security module in the device as well.

But yes, the encryption itself is software-based. But it sits on separate hardware (since the iPhone 5 IIRC) inside the phone.

Yeah, I was referring to the crypto libraries themselves. Definitely ITAR controlled.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (kBIIG)

82 There could be a nuclear time bomb counting down in Times Square...and the cops have the perps phone...and the jihadi laughs and says THE iPHONE PASSWORD will disable the bomb....

dirka dirka Mohammed jihad says Apple.

Posted by: torabora at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (AAvsB)

83 >>Because its the entirety of my life from banking to medical to private messages and emails to ... I mean, everything is in my phone. Everything.

Again, many people have that information stored in other formats that can be subpoenaed under criminal circumstances. Nothing you said gives any rational reason why a cell phone should have unique protection other than you want it to.

I don't think you're going to be very successful in court with that reasoning.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (/tuJf)

84 "Programmers who consider themselves to be terribly precious also love to
do things in their code that points out how wonderful they are"

Stuxnet had some internals suggestive of having been written by Israelis.

But then again, if you were *not* Israeli, but you were writing a worm designed to compromise systems of an Israeli adversary, wouldn't it make sense to make it look as though the crafty Joooos wot done it?

Not too many wilderness survival courses talk about the wilderness of mirrors.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (noWW6)

85 On a related note, anyone see the story this weekend about how private DNA companies, like My 23 and Ancestry.com have been receiving requests from law enforcement to access their DNS dbs?


Yeah, this is my shock face

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (NOIQH)

86 76 Didn't the NSA have the ability to read everything on everyone's phones already? Was that bullshit? Or was the whole lawsuit thing bullshit to make the peasants think the govt actually follows its own laws?
Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (0LHZx)

It's about setting up legal precedent to get the "cracked info" admissible in court.

Yes, the NSA has (/had) unfettered access to our personal info, contrary to their assurances and the posse commitatus act.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (AkOaV)

87 68 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

Because its the entirety of my life from banking to medical to private messages and emails to ... I mean, everything is in my phone. Everything.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:12 PM (AkOaV)

_____

So? The entirety of my life is in my house...paper versions of medical records, banking records, private letters, etc.

Yet search warrants for homes are issued without a blink of an eye by a judge.

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (0LHZx)

88 I do not want anyone to be able to access my call history, my text messages, my banking history, my health / car / life insurance information, my personal photo albums etc. etc. etc. unless I give them permission.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (AkOaV)

A federal Warrant says differently

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (mw8Dm)

89 >>>What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

It's not that a phone is special. They had access to the phone and could search it to their hearts content, except for the security on the phone wasn't letting them. Fine use a subpoena and get Apple to give you the key, except they don't have one and have no intention of making one. Get a subpoena and make them make a key? That's over the line. To make them make a way to break into their security.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 28, 2016 07:17 PM (0q2P7)

90 They always could crack the security. They just wanted carte blanche to snoop on the rest of us via the law.

Posted by: Belle Epoque at March 28, 2016 07:17 PM (SJ184)

91 There could be a nuclear time bomb counting down in Times Square...and the cops have the perps phone...and the jihadi laughs and says THE iPHONE PASSWORD will disable the bomb....


With large red digital countdown letters right on the front, yes? I know this bomb.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:17 PM (8ZskC)

92 74 What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)

Especially when you consider that cell phones are just extremely fancy 2 way radios dependent on towers to broadcast and re-broadcast the signals. Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes now franchising Lulu Snackbars at March 28, 2016 07:14 PM (kXoT0)"

That's my conundrum with the whole thing - I agree with you two, yet am deeply troubled by the thought of giving our current govt this kind of power. We should at least be making it hard for 'em.

Posted by: West at March 28, 2016 07:17 PM (HAUuI)

93 So? The entirety of my life is in my house...paper versions of medical records, banking records, private letters, etc.

Yet search warrants for homes are issued without a blink of an eye by a judge.
Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (0LHZx)

but if you, say, write everything in code, they can't force you to divulge the code, right?

I mean, they can try, but there's nothign they can physically do (legally) to get you to turn it over if you refuse to.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:18 PM (AkOaV)

94 It's all b.s. designed to make you think they aren't reading your texts. Emails and listening in real time. The bad guys are looking at alternative means of com's.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:18 PM (BTnAK)

95
A federal Warrant says differently
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:16 PM (mw8Dm)

...and if I use peer to peer encryption (which I do), they can search until their hearts content and all they'll get is a bunch of 0's and 1's.

But they don't want Apple users to have that same level of security.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (AkOaV)

96
The phone in question was a 5c I believe. They've gotten much more encrypted and unbreakable since then.

In theory.


Yeah, probably not as much as they think.




Posted by: Admiral Karl Doenitz

Cry me a river, dude.

Posted by: Admiral Chuichi Nagumo at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM (LAe3v)








Encryption, tovarisch? What's that?

Posted by: Zombie General Alexander Samsonov at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (o98Jz)

97 we're all through the looking glass all the time.



Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (vb33c)

98 Those Western Rifle Pooters guys are all sorts of retahded. Just sayin'.

Posted by: Lincolntf at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (2cS/G)

99 94 It's all b.s. designed to make you think they aren't reading your texts. Emails and listening in real time. The bad guys are looking at alternative means of com's.
Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:18 PM (BTnAK)

third party open source p2p encryption is damned near unbreakable.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (AkOaV)

100 So? The entirety of my life is in my house...paper versions of medical records, banking records, private letters, etc.


I believe that the issue here was the fact that THE PHONE'S OWNER WAS DEAD. Therefore, he was unlikely to respond productively to a search warrant for the material on the locked-up phone.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (8ZskC)

101 Never, ever bluff.

Posted by: Rule Number One at March 28, 2016 07:20 PM (mcm0N)

102 How do you say Samsung Galaxy in Urdu?

Posted by: the littl shyning man at March 28, 2016 07:20 PM (U6f54)

103 That's my conundrum with the whole thing - I agree with you two, yet am deeply troubled by the thought of giving our current govt this kind of power. We should at least be making it hard for 'em.
Posted by: West at March 28, 2016 07:17 PM (HAUuI)


They already have that power and always have. The legal issue here was not that the Gov has the right to get a warrant to see your papers or phone, but that they were supposedly forcing a private company to make something that did not already exists, supposedly. And since The Justice Department withdrew the request that still remains to be decided.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:20 PM (mw8Dm)

104 I mean, whatever, all this does is help Google. Since android is open source and allows anyone to write apps for it.

And you can use true peer to peer encryption and there's nothing anyone can do to break it.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:20 PM (AkOaV)

105 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything.

This has been my thought as well. I've never understood why a phone would receive a special exemption.

And now I'm laughing at Apple. They turned this into a moral crusade as a marketing effort to show how secure their product is, only to have the feds say "Naw bro, we're good".

They would have been better off just quietly helping the feds, but someone "Had To Take A Stand"

I hate when companies decide they need to be "good citizens". Just shut up and go make money.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:21 PM (kBIIG)

106 Never heard of the Dethguild blog, which originated that "open letter"...

The post uses too many buzzwords and too many cute turns of phrase. I get the feeling its author's not really trying to get Ace on his side. He's more trying to piss Ace off. (Unfortunately I'm worried he's going to succeed at it, and our chicken is going to have another restless evening or two.)

Also any attention whore can say "yeah, I hit it". Talk is cheap.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:22 PM (6FqZa)

107 I believe that the issue here was the fact that THE PHONE'S OWNER WAS DEAD. Therefore, he was unlikely to respond productively to a search warrant for the material on the locked-up phone.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:19 PM (8ZskC)

It goes back to the "unbreakable safe" scenario.

If the government gets a warrant to search my safe, but my safe self destructs if they enter the wrong combo x number of times -- there's nothing they can do to gain access to that information if I refuse to turn over the combo (or say I forgot). I mean I guess they could hold me in contempt of court, but that's about it.

Unless they try to force the company who made the safe to find a way to defeat their own security measures.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:22 PM (AkOaV)

108 >>I believe that the issue here was the fact that THE PHONE'S OWNER WAS
DEAD. Therefore, he was unlikely to respond productively to a search
warrant for the material on the locked-up phone.

IIRC, it was also that the police had reset the iPhone's password, but then failed to write the new one down. It was a mess to begin with, but the feds wanted the encryption key and used the "but it's a terrorist's phone!!!" case to demand it.
Which is why I was on team no one - don't trust any of these b@stards.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:22 PM (NOIQH)

109 I hate when companies decide they need to be "good citizens". Just shut up and go make money.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:21 PM (kBIIG)

Well as an Apple stock holder I am all on board with that

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:23 PM (mw8Dm)

110 >>Fine use a subpoena and get Apple to give you the key, except they don't have one and have no intention of making one. Get a subpoena and make them make a key? That's over the line. To make them make a way to break into their security.

I'm not convinced it is over the line. The phone company has to expend resources, for which they are compensated, for running phone taps, searching records etc. All Apple needed to do was to turn off the security feature and let the FBI run random passwords until it opened. Seems pretty similar to me.

But now it seems to be a moot point since some little company in Israel built their own key which gives the FBI access and blows up Apple's claim of having rock solid security. Sounds like an own goal to me.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:23 PM (/tuJf)

111 Now they have to admit their hot shit security and all that.

So they patch older versions and don't have to give the keys to anybody. Sounds like a win-win.

Posted by: DaveA at March 28, 2016 07:23 PM (DL2i+)

112 I hate when companies decide they need to be "good citizens". Just shut up and go make money.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at March 28, 2016 07:21 PM (kBIIG)

uh, but this hurts apple financially.

If there's a back door to their OS (which it appears there is), then more people will migrate to Android (which is open source.) Simple as that.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:24 PM (AkOaV)

113 I believe that the issue here was the fact that THE PHONE'S OWNER WAS
DEAD.

Nope...Had NOTHING to do with it, The phone did not even belong to him. It belonged to the County and they gave permission. The WHOLE issue here was supposedly forcing Apple to create something new against their will

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:24 PM (mw8Dm)

114 Well as an Apple stock holder I am all on board with that
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:23 PM (mw8Dm)

as an apple stock holder, you better hope this blows over. Because if their cash cow, the iPhone, is seen as less secure than the Windows phone or Android, it's going to hurt them. Badly.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (AkOaV)

115 The phrase:" there's nothing anyone can do to break it" is like music to the Nsa's Giant ears.

If it were unbreakable, it would be illegal. They got way in.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (BTnAK)

116 98 Well that's just a personal insult. What are they saying that's wrong???

Posted by: MAx at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (LAliD)

117 Well Apple is not so big now are they?
Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 06:59 PM (fizMZ)

The irony to me is that the original court order gave Apple 100% control over the process and the software to help prevent it getting out.

Now the FBI has it on their own. They don't need to beg Apple in the future.

Posted by: Zombie John Gotti at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (g4zfM)

118 If there's a back door to their OS (which it appears there is), then more people will migrate to Android (which is open source.) Simple as that.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:24 PM (AkOaV)


yeah i don't believe that. Most people just want their phones to work and sync with their computers and not give them a hard time

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (mw8Dm)

119 >>Now the FBI has it on their own. They don't need to beg Apple in the future.

Exactly.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (/tuJf)

120 "And now I'm laughing at Apple. They turned this into a moral crusade as a marketing effort to show how secure their product is"

Steve Handjobs is awfully close to the Obama administration.

My guess has been that it hasn't been a marketing effort so much as it has been the White House calling in markers with Apple. Trying to thwart an investigation by the disliked FBI, one of the few departments of Fedzilla to retain operational autonomy.

There could well be stuff on that phone which would be politically radioactive for Democrats. It's an election year. Not too hard to connect the dots here.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (noWW6)

121 >>The phrase:" there's nothing anyone can do to break it" is like music to the Nsa's Giant ears.


The NSA's security isn't unbreakable, either. Heh.

Posted by: Sid Blumenthal at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (NOIQH)

122 Most people just want their phones to work and sync with their computers and not give them a hard time

Plus if people haven't switched from their shitty iPhones by now nothing is going to make them.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (LYCUN)

123 Right. So my theory was that all the ostentatious public arguing and threats were to cover the fact that Apple gave the Feds the key from the beginning.

Posted by: Grandmalcaesar at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (DW7oD)

124 as an apple stock holder, you better hope this blows over. Because if their cash cow, the iPhone, is seen as less secure than the Windows phone or Android, it's going to hurt them. Badly.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (AkOaV)


Yeah as I said I don't think so. Most consumers like my daughters and wife are more interested in the style and that it works easily.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (mw8Dm)

125 more kabuki, why would the fbi announce they have devised a hack for the iphone? everyone is better off if everyone believes the iphone is unhackable even if it is hacked. even more, why would someone in israel give up that they had hacked?

Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (vb33c)

126 One Stuxnet theory I've read - the virus was written by Americans and Israelis who were trying to get longterm intel on Iran, and then made more virulent by an Israeli faction who wanted to knock Iran's nuclear programme out RIGHT. NOW.

Which worked, but also made it so noticeable that it was caught.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (6FqZa)

127 Apple's super duper pooper scooper security is now just super pooper.

Posted by: scrubjay at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (Ka4C5)

128 Plus if people haven't switched from their shitty iPhones by now nothing is going to make them.
Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (LYCUN)

I love my iPhone.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:28 PM (mw8Dm)

129 yeah i don't believe that. Most people just want their phones to work and sync with their computers and not give them a hard time
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (mw8Dm)

well yeah but most people are stupid.

Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:28 PM (vb33c)

130 >>>And now I'm laughing at Apple.

Why exactly? They got their message across. Which is we won't cooperate in building government back doors into our phones when they order us to. It was never about whether the Justice Dept could figure out a way to crack security on a phone that's 3 years old and a major rev from current.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 28, 2016 07:28 PM (0q2P7)

131 It's all theatre.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (BTnAK)

132 well switching from a iphone to an android device is not the move for someone wanting greater security.

Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (vb33c)

133 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything.

What was special was that the FBI actually asked for software to open all 5 series phones and under. They wanted a tool to open any of millions of phones simply with administrative warrant which doesn't require any "real" warrant. They wanted a skeleton key to hundreds of millions of personal desks to riff through personal papers.
They probably used NAND mirroring.

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (lVFit)

134 as an apple stock holder, you better hope this blows over. Because if their cash cow, the iPhone, is seen as less secure than the Windows phone or Android, it's going to hurt them. Badly.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes



There's no privacy with any of those devices.

Companies like Google probably sell all that info about what Android users do to all sorts of companies.

Posted by: Swingline at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (+9uBk)

135 What was special was that the FBI actually asked for software to open all 5 series phones and under. They wanted a tool to open any of millions of phones simply with administrative warrant which doesn't require any "real" warrant. They wanted a skeleton key to hundreds of millions of personal desks to riff through personal papers.
They probably used NAND mirroring.
Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (lVFit)


Actually no

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (mw8Dm)

136 It may surprise you that Alex Jones makes a good living by putting out conspiracy theories.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (54fi8)

137 If it were unbreakable, it would be illegal.

Ayep.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (6FqZa)

138 everyone wanting security was usually a blackberry user. blackberry does not have the resources to be competitive much less secure now.

Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (vb33c)

139 >>Which worked, but also made it so noticeable that it was caught


I like to think that was more of a 'Fuck You' to the Obama Admin. - who were likely trying to undo any progress that was already made at the time.

Posted by: garrett at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (MvFEq)

140 124 as an apple stock holder, you better hope this blows over. Because if their cash cow, the iPhone, is seen as less secure than the Windows phone or Android, it's going to hurt them. Badly.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:25 PM (AkOaV)


Yeah as I said I don't think so. Most consumers like my daughters and wife are more interested in the style and that it works easily.
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:27 PM (mw8Dm)


Besides, who do you want to be sold out by? Apple (iOS) or Google (Android)?

I mean, it's not as if both of them aren't in the back pocket of the Democrat-Media Complex or anything in the first place, is it?

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 07:30 PM (s5o+q)

141 Apple would have been paid for their expenses. A lot of people who complain about forcing Apple to do some work on their own product have no problem with eminent domain being available to private entities to force private citizens to turn over their property for 'fair' compensation. Or at least they support someone who does.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (MNgU2)

142 >>>They don't need to beg Apple in the future.

10 minutes until an improved security protection is on Apple Phones. In fact it may already be improved in the 6/6S.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (0q2P7)

143 I assume that nothing I put on my phone, iPhone or any other phone or computer is ever "safe".

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (mw8Dm)

144 Blah blah blah.

It's not that it's less secure, it's that it's no longer as secure - if someone with resources is looking.

Was going to happen eventually, you just hope it happens after you switch to the next technology.

But you can still do it through a third party, if you trust the third party. Not quite as fast or simple.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (wB8Tg)

145 yeah i don't believe that. Most people just want their phones to work and sync with their computers and not give them a hard time
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:26 PM (mw8Dm)

Not the early adopters and techy types who buy new phones as soon as they come out and drive iphone sales.

But I suppose we'll see.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (AkOaV)

146 By physically removing the flash memory, they can isolate it from interaction with the iOS operating system and peek inside, assuming there are no complications such as an authentication link between the memory and the A7 processor, or there's no built-in state machine that would erase it if disconnected from the processor.

Posted by: profligatewaste at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (+gatN)

147 >>Right. So my theory was that all the ostentatious public arguing and
threats were to cover the fact that Apple gave the Feds the key from the
beginning.


Yep.
Most countries don't have wiretapping laws, and require telecom companies to provide some level of access to their subscribers as a prerequisite for doing business. I would say it is likely that Apple had already given this type of access to China, at minimum.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (NOIQH)

148 No Ace, I think your first intuition is correct.

They simply "remembered" the security passcode they changed it to.

Remember, they had the county IT guy "change" the password after they took possession of it from the terrorist.

The whole case was a camels nose expedition by the government.

They wanted to force Apple to comply when Apple wouldn't play ball and public opinion was lining up with them they folded and concocted this face saving bullshit.

Posted by: Kreplach at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (59vup)

149 >>If it were unbreakable, it would be illegal.


I am pretty sure i have an unbreakable comb somewhere around here.

Posted by: garrett at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (MvFEq)

150 So I guess we're all saying that Tim Cook is letting strange men in through the back door?

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (6FqZa)

151 Actually no
Posted by: Nevergiveup


Actually yes. page 5 of the court filing.

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (lVFit)

152 Which is we won't cooperate in building back doors.

And you know that how? Because of this junior high school theatre production. M'kay.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (BTnAK)

153 This is a win-win for all involved. Apple gets to look like they stuck it the Man, the FBI gets their info and the Israelis get to brag to the Fuzzy Wuzzies that they are in their base, killin' their d00dz.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (ppaKI)

154 no problem with eminent domain being available to private entities to force private citizens to turn over their property for 'fair' compensation.

Yeah well that is not what Eminent Domain is. ONLY government entities can wield Eminent Domain

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (mw8Dm)

155 They don't need to beg Apple in the future.



Exactly.


Software upgrade in 3, 2, 1

Posted by: DaveA at March 28, 2016 07:33 PM (DL2i+)

156 There's no privacy with any of those devices.

Companies like Google probably sell all that info about what Android users do to all sorts of companies.
Posted by: Swingline at March 28, 2016 07:29 PM (+9uBk)

Apple has strict requirements about what apps can go on their phones.

Google doesn't. Microsoft doesn't.

I have an android, and iphone, and a Windows 10 phone (my work phone). My android uses full third party peer to peer encryption. My texts and phone calls are (can be) encrypted. All anyone can see is 1's and 0's.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:33 PM (AkOaV)

157 I assume that nothing I put on my phone, iPhone or any other phone or computer is ever "safe".
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (mw8Dm)


This, shouted from several hundred thousand mountaintops . . .

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 07:33 PM (s5o+q)

158 I know they have to run ops, but this is insulting our intelligence. Frankly, a lot of lone wolves are pretty stupid so it will still work and keep some of them stupid.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:34 PM (BTnAK)

159 >>What was special was that the FBI actually asked for software to open all 5 series phones and under. They wanted a tool to open any of millions of phones simply with administrative warrant which doesn't require any "real" warrant. They wanted a skeleton key to hundreds of millions of personal desks to riff through personal papers.
They probably used NAND mirroring.

That isn't what I've read at all. Do you have a link for that?

Because what I've read is the FBI said they would give Apple the phone and let them turn off security and then the FBI would remotely run passwords at the phone until they got it opened. They specifically said that they would never take possession of any special software that Apple needed to perform the security suspension.

If that has changed I'd love to see it. I somehow doubt that any court would allow the FBI to rewrite the law as to when subpoenas are required to access private information but I've been wrong before.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:34 PM (/tuJf)

Posted by: goatexchange at March 28, 2016 07:34 PM (Nd4YY)

161 Smart terrorists can still find ways to encrypt their messages. But catching dumb terrorists is better than catching no terrorists.

Posted by: broseidon king of the brocean at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (4/i9Y)

162 no problem with eminent domain being available to private entities to force private citizens to turn over their property for 'fair' compensation.

Yeah well that is not what Eminent Domain is. ONLY government entities can wield Eminent Domain
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (mw8Dm)


The devil you say?!?

Posted by: Teh Donald at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (s5o+q)

163 I find it ironic that an IPhone can't be cracked, considering every one my family has owned has cracked every time we so much as breathed hard on it.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (ppaKI)

164
...and the jihadi laughs and says THE iPHONE PASSWORD will disable the bomb....

With large red digital countdown letters right on the front, yes? I know this bomb.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero)


The countdown stops at 007

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (FkBIv)

165 All anyone can see is ones and zeros.

Do not bet the house on that. Just don't.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (BTnAK)

166 160
Posted by: goatexchange at March 28, 2016 07:34 PM (Nd4YY)


No goats today.

Goats tomorrow.

No goats today.

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (s5o+q)

167 158 I know they have to run ops, but this is insulting our intelligence. Frankly, a lot of lone wolves are pretty stupid so it will still work and keep some of them stupid.
Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:34 PM (BTnAK)

lone wolves don't need comms.

but it is funny that the media does not realize that the terrorists will go low tech off the grid if everything is monitored and hacked.

Posted by: yankeefifth at March 28, 2016 07:36 PM (vb33c)

168 The word "anyone", does not mean what you think it means.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:36 PM (BTnAK)

169 Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:32 PM (mw8Dm)

Government entity on behalf of a private entity. I know you are familiar with Kelo.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 07:37 PM (MNgU2)

170 I do think the idea that a "phone" is something extra special that nobody can access does seem odd.

There's absolutely nothing else I can think of where a company would be allowed to shield something "private".

Even for relatively minor crimes, I could easily see a judge granting a search warrant for say a safety deposit box where they would go in and drill it out. Even if the bank protested That would be a no brainer even for a small crime like fraud or theft. And this involved a mass killing and ISIS.



Right now, the FBI has the "technology" to break your door down and search your home. But that doesn't mean they "get to" do it.

if you want to ensure privacy, stop the warrantless surveillance program. The idea that the FBI can physically take your phone and with a warrant access who it called, seems trivial.

Posted by: Swingline at March 28, 2016 07:37 PM (+9uBk)

171 167 if they are in pairs they do. The husband wife, brother teams communicate. So I misused "lone". M'bad

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:39 PM (BTnAK)

172 That isn't what I've read at all. Do you have a link for that?

Because what I've read is the FBI said they would give Apple the phone and let them turn off security and then the FBI would remotely run passwords at the phone until they got it opened. They specifically said that they would never take possession of any special software that Apple needed to perform the security suspension.

Look it up at Wired or Techdirt or a number of other places. the FBI wanted the software tool to be developed and then turned over to them. With that tool any agent can use an administrative warrant to open a 5 series phone. I don't know where you read that the FBI didn't want the tool, that was the point.

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:39 PM (lVFit)

173 Do not bet the house on that. Just don't.
Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:35 PM (BTnAK)

Well, as secure as can be.

Third party open source encryption is fairly trustable as far as technology goes.

Works for drug dealers and terrorists at least.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:40 PM (AkOaV)

174 Headline from the future, Ahmed the clock boy realized his dream. It's Science bitches, he was quoted as saying emphatically

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at March 28, 2016 07:40 PM (54fi8)

175
Government entity on behalf of a private entity. I know you are familiar with Kelo.
Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 07:37 PM (MNgU2)


They act in their own self interests usually which may or may not coincide with the interests of a private company. That interest, as far as the local government is concerned is usually an increased value of the land involved, increased tax rateables, and there for in the interest of the Local Governmental Authority.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:41 PM (mw8Dm)

176 I really don't get how anyone who claims to be in favor of small government can be in favor of a 1984 Owellesque all encompassing surveillance state.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:41 PM (AkOaV)

177 Yet the terrorists outside the country seemed to get droned regularly. Hmmmmmmm.

Posted by: simplemind at March 28, 2016 07:41 PM (BTnAK)

178 jackstraw, I can't believe you are not familiar with administrative warrants or "sneak and peek".

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:41 PM (lVFit)

179 The husband wife, brother teams communicate.

Posted by: Tony Soprano at March 28, 2016 07:41 PM (LYCUN)

180 I assume that nothing I put on my phone, iPhone or any other phone or computer is ever "safe".
Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:31 PM (mw8Dm)
------------------
This, this, this.

I've had a Samsung Galaxy S3, which I loved, and then when it died I got an iPhone 6, because my husband said he liked his better. Pfffft. I much prefer the Samsung. But, the one thing I like is that I can iMessage my daughter who is in Europe right now for free, without having to use any apps like What's App (which I won't use because I remember reading that terrorists use it because it disappears your texts). I never put banking info, credit card, info, etc. on any phone. I told my daughter and her friend before they left for Europe to delete any apps on their phones that contained any kind of banking or cc info, since the second they go onto public wifi they will be attacked. I don't trust anyone!

Posted by: bluebell at March 28, 2016 07:42 PM (2WwbN)

181 That the phone was not owned by Mr or Mrs Jihadi and if the owner was the public County where is the problem that a employee used public property to commit a crime that that property couldn't be searched?

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 07:42 PM (fizMZ)

182 They're doing it wrong.

Posted by: Tony Soprano at March 28, 2016 07:42 PM (LYCUN)

183 Justice department to Hillary: we have your back, ma'am.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at March 28, 2016 07:42 PM (U6f54)

184
Why an I imagining that the FBI's "We hacked your phone, dudes!" involved a scene similar to Hansel busting up a Mac in Zoolander and then asking, "Where are the files?"

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot, Epic Battle of the Cyclic Stars (TM) at March 28, 2016 07:42 PM (BK3ZS)

185 'Ted Cruz's senate e-address was a subscriber of Ashley Madison'
http://tinyurl.com/jotbzgo

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:43 PM (6FqZa)

186 The FBI cracked the phone and then accidentally dropped it in the toilet. Doh!

Posted by: scofflaw_x at March 28, 2016 07:43 PM (y9ZJX)

187 My understanding is that the hack most likely rewrites the number of tries in memory, so that it never reaches the limit of cracking (and presumably the limit of intense slowness).

Solving this is a tough one for Apple. Not to say they haven't solved it but that it is a tough issue: the number of tries theoretically can't be encrypted with the user's key, because the phone doesn't yet have the key. If the phone had the key, the phone would be unlocked. Since the phone is not unlocked, encrypted data isn't available. Which means that the memory location where "number of tries" is stored can't be encrypted. Which means that copying the memory (either that location or the entire memory) and then copying back after or just before the phone does its memory wipe.

From Apple's standpoint, there is a whole lot of "turtles on top of turtles" in attempting to solve that problem.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 07:44 PM (2lndx)

188 I assume the government right now is still gathering meta data if it's legal for them or not. There is no reason to me they should do it.

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 07:45 PM (fizMZ)

189 here's a link:

http://tinyurl.com/h6hamyc

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at March 28, 2016 07:45 PM (lVFit)

190 OT, Drudge:
Brussels Bomber Was 'Migrant Rights Activist'...

The Right to Bomb.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:46 PM (uURQL)

191 I really don't get how anyone who claims to be in favor of small government can be in favor of a 1984 Owellesque all encompassing surveillance state.
Posted by: Harry Paratestes


Right now, with a warrant, the FBI can install a video camera in your bedroom.

So the idea that a dead terrorist with connections to ISIS (who doesn't even legally own the phone, it was his company's) should somehow be protected form an FBI search, stretches the limit for what I consider reasonable civil liberties.

Even if some tool allows the FBI to search other phones, they still legally need a warrant.

As I said earlier, the FBI has the technology to knock my door down and search my place, that doesn't mean they get to do it without due process.

Posted by: Swingline at March 28, 2016 07:47 PM (+9uBk)

192 Nope...Had NOTHING to do with it, The phone did not even belong to him. It belonged to the County and they gave permission. The WHOLE issue here was supposedly forcing Apple to create something new against their will

Yes, you're right that the real issue here had to do with whether the Feds should have the power to compel Apple to create a key that would let them unlock the phone. I supported Apple's refusal, FWIW.

However, that question should not be conflated with the issue whether the data of a person under investigation can be subpoenaed, which was happening upthread. Whether it is paper or electronic, your data can be collected assuming that relevance and probable cause have been demonstrated. If your electronic data is password protected or even locked in a safe, you can be compelled to give investigators access to it.

Here, there is no question that the data on the phone was potentially relevant and subject to subpoena or search warrant. However, the phone was password protected and the the county hadn't been smart enough to set up its phones so that its IT people could unlock them if the user died or disappeared. That's why the feds needed the key from Apple.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:47 PM (8ZskC)

193 This is going to get REAL bad.

Posted by: Eromero at March 28, 2016 07:48 PM (zLDYs)

194 As I said earlier, the FBI has the technology to knock my door down and search my place, that doesn't mean they get to do it without due process.

Unless they just happen, accidentally, though no fault of their own, to misread the address.

Not their fault. Could happen to anyone.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 07:49 PM (2lndx)

195 'Ted Cruz's senate e-address was a subscriber of Ashley Madison' http://tinyurl.com/jotbzgoPosted by: boulder terlit hobo


Oh, Canada!

(Ashley Madison is Canadian based)

*whistles innocently*

Posted by: mega machines at March 28, 2016 07:49 PM (fbovC)

196 Step 1 to removing the rationale for the police state - remove the Islamic Jihadist population that they need to police.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 07:50 PM (uURQL)

197 As I said earlier, the FBI has the technology to knock my door down and search my place, that doesn't mean they get to do it without due process.

Unless they just happen, accidentally, though no fault of their own, to misread the address.

Not their fault. Could happen to anyone.



BTW, that's when your dog gets it.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:51 PM (8ZskC)

198 As I said earlier, the FBI has the technology to knock my door down and search my place, that doesn't mean they get to do it without due process.

Unless they just happen, accidentally, though no fault of their own, to misread the address.

Not their fault. Could happen to anyone.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair



But that's a separate issue.

That's like saying because a prosecutor could be corrupt, nobody should ever be convicted of any crimes.

If the FBI starts going into people's phones without a warrant, it would be no different than if they started tapping phone lines without a warrant.

Posted by: Swingline at March 28, 2016 07:51 PM (+9uBk)

199 >>I really don't get how anyone who claims to be in favor of small
government can be in favor of a 1984 Owellesque all encompassing
surveillance state.


I don't anyone here is for the all-encompassing surveillance state. It's just that the government already has a process in place to access an individual's property via subpoenas, and the reality (revealed by Snowden) that the NSA is already freaking doing this in bulk in advance of a specific crime or an individual catching their attention. So, despite Apple's very public outrage, the horse is already out of the barn.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:52 PM (NOIQH)

200 However, the phone was password protected and the the county hadn't been smart enough to set up its phones so that its IT people could unlock them if the user died or disappeared.

I am not so sure about "not smart enough". They had the software. They chose not to enable that feature. It's essential in order to be able to comply with various public records laws. I want to know why it wasn't enabled.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 07:52 PM (2lndx)

201 They never should have taken Apple to court in the first place. Glad it's over. The government should not be able to compel a company to create something for it (in this case the software hack to get into the phone).

Posted by: K-E at March 28, 2016 07:53 PM (XI2IF)

202 >>Look it up at Wired or Techdirt or a number of other places. the FBI wanted the software tool to be developed and then turned over to them. With that tool any agent can use an administrative warrant to open a 5 series phone. I don't know where you read that the FBI didn't want the tool, that was the point.

No thanks. If you have a link then I'll happily read it but I'm not googling for your side of the argument.

As to where I got the idea that the FBI didn't want to specifically take the piece of software, I got if from Comey's testimony before Congress. Here is just one article where Peter King states exactly what I said, that Apple would retain possession of the phone while it was unlocked and the FBI would scan it remotely. There is no mention of changing any laws at all.

http://tinyurl.com/zgrza2z

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:54 PM (/tuJf)

203 Either way, the FBI/DOJ has signaled how they act in the future and given Apple and others incentive to make their encryption more solid and fool proof and unable to be hacked even by themselves.

Whereas if the FBI hadn't got up on their high horse in the first place, they could at least have backed out now without many even knowing about it.


Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at March 28, 2016 07:54 PM (Xo1Rt)

204 Question about this infamous phone.

As I understand , it is the property of SB,issued to this person to ostensibly aid him in his job duties.

If this is so, then there should be a password from the issuing entity allowing access. That password would be on file in a secure location.

So why is everyone going around the barn here?


Or did I misread things?

Posted by: irongrampa at March 28, 2016 07:55 PM (P/8aq)

205 Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:54 PM (/tuJf)

your right, that other guy is wrong. Don't sweat it

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 28, 2016 07:55 PM (mw8Dm)

206 "With large red digital countdown letters right on the front, yes?"

Nixie Tubes FTW!

Posted by: Chris M at March 28, 2016 07:57 PM (6RZos)

207 OT: I watched a kind of good movie today. It is Inherent Vice based on a novel by Thomas Pynchon. I know, I know. But even though this movie is all weird and fucked up and shit it kinda makes sense. The Pynchon fanboys reviews on Amazon don't like the novel because even though it's all weird and fucked up and shit it kinda makes sense.

The movie is about a hippy professional PI, part-time shade tree pharmacist, and full-time doper in groovy 1970 Las Angeles who gets mixed up in the disappearance of a real estate mogul. He meets a bunch of perverts and hipsters and Aryan Nations and Black Guerilla Family and teeny boppers and shit and kind of half way solves the crime. This is sort of like The Big Lebowski on acid except groovier. One difficulty; the stars are from the mumble school of acting and that given the unusual vocabulary and dialogue, however historically accurate, sometimes make it difficult to understand what's going on. Bonus: boobs

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 07:57 PM (Nwg0u)

208 THE PHONE'S OWNER WAS DEAD
THEN WHO WAS PHONE

@51 Georges Simenon. Liege, Belgium. Coincidence? I think not.

And, the nuclear device in Times Square. With the digital counter clock.
It will stop at 0. 0. 7. ev. ery damn time.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 07:57 PM (xq1UY)

209 Ever notice how many people who are not authorized to comment publicly run their mouths?

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 07:58 PM (e3bId)

210 If the FBI starts going into people's phones without a warrant, it would be no different than if they started tapping phone lines without a warrant.

They investigate themselves and excuse themselves because it was all for good reasons?

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 07:58 PM (2lndx)

211 The moral of this story is nothing made can't be cracked,

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 07:59 PM (fizMZ)

212 If this is so, then there should be a password from the issuing entity allowing access. That password would be on file in a secure location.


Yes, there should be. Unfortunately, this was San Bernardino County, and there wasn't.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 07:59 PM (8ZskC)

213 Uranus is cracked!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:00 PM (e3bId)

214 They investigate themselves and excuse themselves because it was all for good reasons?

-
Preventing anti-Islam backlash?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 08:00 PM (Nwg0u)

215 So, despite Apple's very public outrage, the horse is already out of the barn.
Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 07:52 PM (NOIQH)

Right. But as of today, nothing the NSA does can be used against you in court.

The cops have to rely on "parallel construction."

So what you're saying is we should totally legalize the NSA's methods as par for the course for domestic law enforcement?

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:00 PM (AkOaV)

216 The iPhone: Secure against everything but Jews.

Posted by: Apple at March 28, 2016 08:00 PM (iMxBJ)

217 If this is so, then there should be a password from the issuing entity allowing access. That password would be on file in a secure location.

There should have been. But the issuing entity chose not to enable that feature. I haven't seen the reason reported on.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (2lndx)

218 Just saw on the sidebar our favorite stooge is at it again with volleyball, gotta go check this out

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (fizMZ)

219
Okay, so far Mr. Bean is playing it straight. It takes place in 1950s Paris, jazz and stripper clubs. Very stylish...

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (iQIUe)

220 Paradoxical that President Haman simultaneously wishes Israel ill, and yet can't get by without their assistance. Yet I doubt this will dispose him more favorably towards them.

Posted by: angela urkel at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (++MnV)

221 By "an unidentified entity" ???

My money says the entity is Apple. They posture for their fan base, not cooperating with the evil nosy FBI.

They also know that they don't want to incur the wrath of Big Brother, so they make a behind-the-scenes deal.

Posted by: rails777 at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (uSHnf)

222 Hillary will only scissor with you if your name ends in an a.

Posted by: biscuiteater at March 28, 2016 08:02 PM (tQREO)

223 Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:54 PM (/tuJf)

Jack, once that ability exists, Apple will be force by every subpoena and warrant that comes out of every podunk LEO agency in america to unlock / decrypt any phone they want.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:02 PM (AkOaV)

224 the crypto is in iOS. They don't have any dedicated hardware security features. They can't because all the hardware is manufactured off shore and sending the crypto overseas is an ITAR violation

Nope. ITAR got reworked in order to allow US firms to participate in the Internet (otherwise only foreigners could make a secure browser and server). The AES256 encryption in play here is in the DMA controller.

Posted by: Ian S. at March 28, 2016 08:02 PM (3CwVB)

225 Right now there is no way for apple to unlock an iPhone. the FBI says "create a way."

Once they create it, Apple HAS to comply with any warrant saying "open this phone" from any law enforcement entity on the planet.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:02 PM (AkOaV)

226 There should have been. But the issuing entity chose not to enable that feature. I haven't seen the reason reported on.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:01 PM (2lndx)

they should have had an MDM software like mobileiron which would give them the ability to remotely track and unlock the phone.

Thats what most government / business / non profit / whoever agency does. Including my employer and the companies / govt/edu institutions I sell technology to.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:04 PM (AkOaV)

227 I think they always had this up their sleeve, but they didn't want to use it because it only works on old versions of iOS/hardware. They wanted to force Apple to make them a backdoor they could use on all iPhones, including current and future models, and they wanted that court precedent to give them leverage to use the same tactics against Google and others. The whole thing was a dog and pony show; there's really nothing on the phone of value, and they know it.

But when it became obvious that Apple's lawyers had them outclassed in every way, they withdrew their request because they don't want to set a precedent against themselves.

So your first instinct was on the mark, Ace, even if they do have a way to break into Farook's iPhone.

Posted by: Caiwyn at March 28, 2016 08:04 PM (ANvDa)

228 The iPhone: Secure against everything but Jews.
Posted by: Apple at March 28, 2016 08:00 PM (iMxBJ)


Insert globalist banker conspiracy here.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 08:04 PM (uURQL)

229 Huma, I want my next email server to run on an iPhone. Make it happen, then bring me some iced tea and give me a foot rub.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at March 28, 2016 08:04 PM (iMxBJ)

230 @224: This is a huge victory for Obama. Hope no Tea Partiers use a 5C.

Posted by: Ian S. at March 28, 2016 08:04 PM (3CwVB)

231 >>So what you're saying is we should totally legalize the NSA's methods as par for the course for domestic law enforcement?

Nope, not at all. What the NSA is doing is beyond upsetting.
Just acknowledging that it is exists and people should make assumptions about how private their data is based on reality, not principles.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 08:05 PM (NOIQH)

232 It's worth the visit, too f in funny

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 08:06 PM (fizMZ)

233 I don't do ANY of my illegal shit on my iPhone.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:06 PM (e3bId)

234 Nope, not at all. What the NSA is doing is beyond upsetting.
Just acknowledging that it is exists and people should make assumptions about how private their data is based on reality, not principles.
Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 08:05 PM (NOIQH)

Okay, then why not fight it as much as we can when it comes to allowing this information the NSA has to be used in court against us?

And what am I supposed to do? My entire life is on my phone. Should I be a luddite?

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:06 PM (AkOaV)

235 >>Jack, once that ability exists, Apple will be force by every subpoena and warrant that comes out of every podunk LEO agency in america to unlock / decrypt any phone they want.

The ability exists. What do you think the company in Israel did? More importantly, what made you think that it couldn't be done? This isn't some highly sophisticated device, it's a friggin cell phone.

Apple lost in court and would have lost on appeal. And now they don't even need Apple's help. Smart.

Let's see if there is an epidemic of iPhone opening by the FBI. I'm thinking no.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 08:07 PM (/tuJf)

236 OT, but these days it's important to celebrate good news.

Idaho's governor signed Constitutional Carry legislation today.

Sure wish my state would do that.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at March 28, 2016 08:08 PM (eHpnh)

237 And what am I supposed to do? My entire life is on my phone. Should I be a luddite?

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:06 PM (AkOaV)


The Amish seem to have a very nice lifestyle, except for the lack of hot wimmen.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 08:08 PM (8ZskC)

238 So San Bernardino County issued a phone that in theory couldn't be cracked, which would make any audit trail impossible, and they paid twice as much as a comparable Android phone. Bravo.

Posted by: Josephistan at March 28, 2016 08:08 PM (7qAYi)

239 The ability exists. What do you think the company in Israel did? More importantly, what made you think that it couldn't be done? This isn't some highly sophisticated device, it's a friggin cell phone.

Apple lost in court and would have lost on appeal. And now they don't even need Apple's help. Smart.

Let's see if there is an epidemic of iPhone opening by the FBI. I'm thinking no.
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 08:07 PM (/tuJf)

If there is a backdoor that some Israeli firm found a way to exploit, then I guarantee you that this will be routinely used by every law enforcement agency in the world within months.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:08 PM (AkOaV)

240 and a "friggin cellphone" is computer with a phone app. It's where many many many people do their banking, have most / all conversations in text, email or phone, use for a GPS, etc. etc. etc.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:09 PM (AkOaV)

241 The Amish seem to have a very nice lifestyle, except for the lack of hot wimmen.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at March 28, 2016 08:08 PM (8ZskC)
**********
Once you get them out of the burlap and bonnets they are wimmenz just like anyone else! Hi horde!

Posted by: Truck Monkey at March 28, 2016 08:09 PM (zv81W)

242 I mean you guys are really unbelievable.

Why even fight it? More than 50% of the country seems to be of the "if I'm not doing anything wrong, why do I care if the Stassi listens in to my conversations" mindset.

Absurd.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:10 PM (AkOaV)

243 Stasi*

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:11 PM (AkOaV)

244 I see that Georgia's governor has made homosexuality compulsory today. I hope there's a subsidy on lube and old movies from England in that state

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 08:11 PM (6FqZa)

245 210 Ever notice how many people who are not authorized to comment publicly run their mouths?
Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 07:58 PM (e3bId)

-----------

Wait til DOJ refuses to indict the hildawg.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at March 28, 2016 08:11 PM (kTF2Z)

246 Here's a story about an actual Muslim victim: a Muslim man was beated and stomped to death in Glasgow, by other muzzies who were outraged that he had wished Happy Easter to his Christian host nation.

http://moonbattery.com/?p=70385
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 28, 2016 07:08 PM


Whether consciously or not, Muslims practice their own selective breeding on themselves. They cull any members expressing undesirable traits, like kindness, or gratitude.

For Euros to look on them with rose colored glasses is like the son in Dead/Alive trying to tell himself that his mother and townsfolk weren't really zombies.

Posted by: angela urkel at March 28, 2016 08:12 PM (++MnV)

247 I hope there's a subsidy on lube and old movies from England in that state.

This news requires the flaming London Boys.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:13 PM (2lndx)

248 If I were Celebrite, I'd have called up the FBI and say "sure, we've got a way to open up Apple phones for you. All you've got to do is have that fcuking President of yours stand in front of the UN General Assembly, with the press present, and unconditionally apologize to Ben Netanyahu and Israel for the last seven years' worth of crap. Then we'll give it to you. Free. How badly do you want this?"

Posted by: Qoheleth at March 28, 2016 08:13 PM (iIzG7)

249 What level of military encryption is suitable for cat videos?

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:14 PM (TSMoA)

250 Mossad Squirrel. Strikes again.

Posted by: Osoloco at March 28, 2016 08:14 PM (j1ekQ)

251 >>Why even fight it? More than 50% of the country seems to be of the "if
I'm not doing anything wrong, why do I care if the Stassi listens in to
my conversations" mindset.



Here's why people should care: http://preview.tinyurl.com/zwdhcl4

It's not about listening to individuals, it's about identifying communication networks so that you can easily disrupt them by taking out the key leaders. Tell me this want used to target orgs like True the Vote.

This is why the whole Apple fight seems like a sideshow.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 08:15 PM (NOIQH)

252 Let's see if there is an epidemic of iPhone opening by the FBI. I'm thinking no.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 08:07 PM (/tuJf)


I don't care if there's an epidemic of FBI over-snooping or not. The feral government has no right to demand that people make skeleton keys for their encryptions. The feral government might as well demand that no one be allowed to whisper in public, because ... you know ... criminals whisper in order to keep their criminal plans secret.

People are allowed to have unbreakable encryption. If the govenrment can't make their cases in other ways then they are just too incompetent and giving them retard-tools to make their jobs easier (if totally un-Constitutional) won't help that, at all.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:15 PM (zc3Db)

253 It's where many many many people do their banking,
have most / all conversations in text, email or phone, use for a GPS,
etc. etc. etc.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:09 PM (AkOaV)
===============================================

I use my phone for texting and phone calls. There are topics/words that people in my family know not to use with me on my cell phone. If they stare texting or saying something on those lists, I cut in quick and say "Face - to - Face". We shut up. I do nothing involving money with me phone. I do use GPS. I also have a weather app and an app from Moody Radio. As far as the government knows, I am a penniless Christian who wants to know when it's going to snow. At least by my phone usage. Oh, they also know what I'm supposed to bring to next weekend's baby shower. That's about it.

Posted by: grammie winger, clinging to the old rugged cross at March 28, 2016 08:16 PM (dFi94)

254 253 When shit goes sideways the first thing I won't be using is a cell phone.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:16 PM (TSMoA)

255 My new password is 3^3^1/3 ...

... apparently that shit is unsolvable.

I win !!!

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 08:17 PM (fiGNd)

256 When shit goes sideways the first thing I won't be using is a cell phone.
Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:16 PM (TSMoA)


Before or after they shut down the cell tower network?

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 08:17 PM (s5o+q)

257 What bothers me in the Georgia case is all the companies which threatened to boycott, what a bunch of leftist hags.

Posted by: Skip at March 28, 2016 08:18 PM (fizMZ)

258 "Why even fight it? More than 50% of the country seems to be of the "if

I'm not doing anything wrong, why do I care if the Stassi listens in to

my conversations" mindset."


"If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear."
-- Joseph Goebbels, Reichminister for Propaganda

(The original version of "If you see something, say something")

Posted by: Qoheleth at March 28, 2016 08:19 PM (iIzG7)

259 The day after Easter is a grand time to strike down laws that say you can openly live out your faith.

Posted by: grammie winger, clinging to the old rugged cross at March 28, 2016 08:19 PM (dFi94)

260 I think it's BS. Just because they said they did doesn't mean anything when they will lie about anything.

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:19 PM (BO/km)

261 The IRS should investigate the FBI to be sure they're telling the truth.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at March 28, 2016 08:20 PM (eHpnh)

262 yes I'm all for setting up an American Stasi. You can tell that because I don't find a problem with the warrant process of our system to get info out of a terrorist's cell phone.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (MNgU2)

263 May etch this new-fangled shit on a stone door - just to make Gandolf ponder on it ...

... speak 4^8^1/16 and enter !!!

Correct answer ... "two".

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (fiGNd)

264 @260

The left fights tooth and nail, bare knuckled 24/7, the right folds at the first sign of even the weakest opposition like this disgraceful governor.

See also Nikki Haley and the rest of the GOPe Failure Squad over the confederate flag.

Posted by: Kreplach at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (WVvzl)

265 Considering that most likely, Apple / Google takes a peek through that camera lens from time to time, its irrelevant.

Posted by: the human cupholder at March 28, 2016 08:16 PM (s6/4z)


Hardly. I choose not to use apple or google crap. They can spy on their customers all they want. They deserve each other.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (zc3Db)

266 Before. All the cool kids planning the revolution are using HF. You can learn a lot by just listening.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:22 PM (TSMoA)

267 I just checked. The pass to my luggage is, get this,

1,
2,
3,
4,
5.

Should I change it?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Channeling Skroob at March 28, 2016 08:22 PM (WVsWD)

268 FYI: Pics on DC shooter @WZ - African-American.
Wondered why they didn't show pictures immediately if he was a known threat w/a prior incident.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 08:23 PM (NOIQH)

269 I'd expect that even if they didn't break it open, they'd never admit it. makes 'em look weak.

Posted by: TheThinMan at March 28, 2016 08:23 PM (lc1Qv)

270 yes I'm all for setting up an American Stasi. You can tell that because I don't find a problem with the warrant process of our system to get info out of a terrorist's cell phone.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (MNgU2)


That's just silly. They had the phone and could do anythign to the phone that they wanted. What they wanted, though, was to force a third party to build a tool to unlock all iphones.

If you don't understand the difference between that and your silly description then ... I don't even know what to say.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:23 PM (zc3Db)

271 >>Why even fight it? More than 50% of the country seems to be of the "if I'm not doing anything wrong, why do I care if the Stassi listens in to my conversations" mindset.

Getting just a tad hyperbolic, aren't we? First, the NSA and the FBI are like two totally different organizations. And the NSA has been listening to your phone calls for years, long before Snowden. This was publicly available information and it caused almost nobody to freak out. 60 Minutes did a program in 2000 on Project ECHELON so not exactly a secret.

Second, we are talking about law enforcement having the same ability to get a warrant to search your information whether it is in the same type of record format they have been applying for warrants forever or new technology such as cell phones.

But if you think your cell phone, a fancy radio for all intents, is some secure device because Apple tells you so, think again.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (/tuJf)

272 In a nation where 65% of an entire generation posts photographs of every meal they eat on TwitFace, what basis do they have to talk about privacy?

Posted by: Qoheleth at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (iIzG7)

273 Speaking of cell phones, I was playing with the grands a little bit this afternoon. The two year old had a play phone and said "I texted you Grandma!" I told him that someday he would be old enough to get a real phone, and then he could text me for real. The 4 year old said to me, "You'll be dead by then Grandma."


*sigh*

Posted by: grammie winger, clinging to the old rugged cross at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (dFi94)

274
If you want to look at things
that way, what would make anyone here doubt that somewhere what we post isn't being monitored?

Posted by: irongrampa at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (P/8aq)

275 The left fights tooth and nail, bare knuckled 24/7, the right folds at the first sign of even the weakest opposition like this disgraceful governor.

See also Nikki Haley and the rest of the GOPe Failure Squad over the confederate flag.
Posted by: Kreplach at March 28, 2016 08:21 PM (WVvzl)


Ceding control of the culture and the media has its consequences, does it not?

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 08:25 PM (s5o+q)

276 As far as the government knows, I am a penniless Christian who wants to know when it's going to snow. At least by my phone usage.

Posted by: grammie winger, clinging to the old rugged cross at March 28, 2016 08:16 PM

Duly noted Maam.

Posted by: Bob from the NSA at March 28, 2016 08:26 PM (ShplO)

277 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Should I change it?

By bipartisan consensus, in fact we believe ALL passwords should be 1,2,3,4,5.

Posted by: president skroob and king roland at March 28, 2016 08:26 PM (6FqZa)

278 I sent my first text on Saturday. No shit.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:27 PM (e3bId)

279 See also Nikki Haley and the rest of the GOPe Failure Squad over the confederate flag.

Tell them it's a symbol of Democrats literally massacring Republicans. They'll be all for it.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:27 PM (2lndx)

280 If you want to look at things
that way, what would make anyone here doubt that somewhere what we post isn't being monitored?
Posted by: irongrampa at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (P/8aq)

******

I have zero doubt that this place and many others like it are 100% monitored.

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:27 PM (a/h6D)

281 And here's a pic of the gum I chewed today.

Posted by: Facebook Food Poster at March 28, 2016 08:28 PM (Dwehj)

282 Whether consciously or not, Muslims practice their own selective breeding on themselves.

You are more right than you know.
https://hbdchick.wordpress.com/2011/09/29/inbreeding-in-pakistan/

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 08:28 PM (6FqZa)

283 Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:23 PM (zc3Db)

I don't agree that's what the warrant or the FBI was requesting. Even if some version of that was requested, that would not have given the FBI the right to confiscate a phone and unload its info without a warrant to do so.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:28 PM (MNgU2)

284 All no number is "better" than any other number. No number is dispensible. All numbers are unique.

Greater than and less than perpetuate yhe tiresome stereotype that larger numbers are better than smaller ones.

Besides all that, I suffer from transnumerical dysphoria. I'm getting an operation next month to make me the number infinity.

Posted by: 999 Jenner at March 28, 2016 08:28 PM (++MnV)

285 "See also Nikki Haley and the rest of the GOPe Failure Squad over the confederate flag."

My new First National flag looks great in the picture window. I guarantee you that none of my crackhead neighbors know what it is.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at March 28, 2016 08:29 PM (eHpnh)

286 I think the

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:29 PM (BO/km)

287 That's kind of hbd*chick's thing, btw, on the "wincest" culture among peoples who just happen to be Islamic. (that and small caps on every. damn. post.)

When Muslims come to Londonistan, they impregnate their cousins and nieces there too.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 08:29 PM (6FqZa)

288 I don't give a fuck about the FBI.
I don't give a fuck about the CIA.
I don't give a fuck about the cash on the street
I don't give a fuck about anything

-
But I do know that I love you
And I know that if you love me, too
What a wonderful world this would be

- Sam Cooke

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 08:30 PM (Nwg0u)

289 message here is smash your phnevto little bitty bits if you don't want someone to see what's on it.

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:30 PM (BO/km)

290 290. Awwwwwww, man! They got freaked!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:30 PM (e3bId)

291 When in doubt, roll with us.

Posted by: Those Crafty JOOOS at March 28, 2016 08:31 PM (VQ7bK)

292 Awwwwwww, man! They got freaked!
Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:30 PM (e3bId)

****

BRB. Someone is knoc

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:31 PM (a/h6D)

293 An interesting point here is that the phone in question is a 5c so it has far fewer privacy features than the newer models, especially if our fair terrorists didn't update their software.

Posted by: Lauren at March 28, 2016 08:31 PM (4h3+M)

294 >>Posted by: grammie winger, clinging to the old rugged cross


Aw, grammie!!!
When my son was around that age he would play with my phone and speed-dial his nanna (#1, natch), then have a chat. Had no idea it was happening until my mom mentioned,"Oh, I talked with your son again this morning."

Posted by: Lizzy at March 28, 2016 08:31 PM (NOIQH)

295 I'm getting 00 implants.

Posted by: 999 Jenner at March 28, 2016 08:32 PM (++MnV)

296 Whut the heck? Did I do that?

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:32 PM (BO/km)

297 BRB. Someone is knoc

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:31 PM (a/h6D)

Don't answer that door!

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Channeling Skroob at March 28, 2016 08:32 PM (WVsWD)

298 I don't agree that's what the warrant or the FBI was requesting. Even if some version of that was requested,

That is exactly what was DEMANDED (not requested). The FBI didn't merely seek a warrant giving them the right to access some information. The FBI sought to force labor out of apple in order to render any iphone encryption (by apple) breakable ... in case some idiot had an iphone and password and changed it without remembering to write the new password down, say ...

that would not have given the FBI the right to confiscate a phone and unload its info without a warrant to do so.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:28 PM (MNgU2)


The FBI doesn't have the right to demand that all phones be searchable. THAT is the point. They have the right to be able to try to search anything that the court deems relevant to some investigation but they have NO RIGHT to demand that all things be easily searchable.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:32 PM (zc3Db)

299 @284

At a minimum, media matters and other leftist outlets monitor all of the right blogs, radio, and media.

I'm not quite certain the government is actively monitoring all of the right blogs possibly some of the nefarious and unseamly ones


Hello Bob From the NSA

*waves hand spastically at Bob


Posted by: Kreplach at March 28, 2016 08:33 PM (WVvzl)

300 The FBI/Apple fartbubble finally popped.

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 08:33 PM (MQEz6)

301 One of those chimps at the NSA must have intercepted my comment and mangled it.

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:33 PM (BO/km)

302 301. ALERT! Dump your burner phones and initiate Plan Goober! Initiate Plan Goober!!!!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:34 PM (TSMoA)

303 Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:32 PM (zc3Db)

No they wanted Apple to assist in opening that specific phone.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:34 PM (MNgU2)

304 Meanwhile the guy who pulled a gun at the Capitol was a black pastor who agitates for $15 minimum wage so wooosh down the memory hole.

Posted by: Lauren at March 28, 2016 08:35 PM (4h3+M)

305 What's that whump, whump, whump sound I'm hearing?!

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:35 PM (a/h6D)

306 They are going to cut off one ',' and 2 'o's. Then I will be ,9, Jenner.

Posted by: 999 Jenner at March 28, 2016 08:36 PM (++MnV)

307 No they wanted Apple to assist in opening that specific phone.

And since all Apple phones are custom-made, software for one phone doesn't have any effect on other phones.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:36 PM (2lndx)

308 Goober.

Fartbubble.

Echelon.

Wharrgarbl.

Wharrgarbl.

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 08:37 PM (s5o+q)

309 And since all Apple phones are custom-made, software for one phone doesn't have any effect on other phones.

They're Italian ? I had no idea.

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 08:37 PM (fiGNd)

310 Hey, FBI, find any drawings of Big Mo eating a BLT?

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 08:37 PM (MQEz6)

311 No they wanted Apple to assist in opening that specific phone.
Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:34 PM (MNgU2)

Right now, Apple has no way to disable security features on any phones.

What the government was demanding was that Apple create a way to disable security features by using their digital certificate to force the phone to "update" to a new iOS that disabled that security feature so that the FBI could more easily hack the phone.

Once that software is in existence, any law enforcement agency could get a warrant to force Apple to use that software to force the phones they want to search to "update."

NYPD already said they had over 100 phones they want "cracked."

I get if it you're not technical and haven't been following this closely, but it is a much bigger deal than you seem to think it is.

The fundamental disagreement is whether or not apple should be forced to break their own operating systems' encryption (destroying who knows how many millions / billions in intellectual property and brand good will).

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:38 PM (AkOaV)

312 That should be ,o,

Posted by: 999 Jenner at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (++MnV)

313 I wonder what % of people who have the basic "news" about the nutcase Capitol shooter know he's an SJW black guy?


Not really paying attention to it, so was shocked when I stumbled across that info. Of course, my bad, if the nut had been white and affiliated with dangerous "right wing" causes, we'd probably have had the affirmative action empty suit beclowning himself and making NPR airheads swoon with illiterate inappropriate comments to the "press".


Posted by: rhomboid at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (QDnY+)

314 Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:36 PM (2lndx)

Your sarcasm doesn't change the fact that the FBI did not demand Apple give them the tool to unlock the phone. They just wanted the ability to attempt the passwords without destroying the info.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (MNgU2)

315 No they wanted Apple to assist in opening that specific phone.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:34 PM (MNgU2)


By building a tool that would unlock ANY of that type of iphone.

The FBI cannot demand labor and they cannot demand a skeleton key.

I don't see what's so difficult to understand about this.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (zc3Db)

316
'No they wanted Apple to assist in opening that specific phone'

Hey that reminds me of a song!

Baby take your teeth out
Try it one time
Baby take your teeth out
Try it one time
Leave 'em on the kitchen table

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 08:40 PM (BO/km)

317 As long as the FBI is in there poking around, think they could help me recover my old contact list?

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:40 PM (TSMoA)

318 I wonder what % of people who have the basic "news" about the nutcase Capitol shooter know he's an SJW black guy?


Not really paying attention to it, so was shocked when I stumbled across that info. Of course, my bad, if the nut had been white and affiliated with dangerous "right wing" causes, we'd probably have had the affirmative action empty suit beclowning himself and making NPR airheads swoon with illiterate inappropriate comments to the "press".


Posted by: rhomboid at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (QDnY+)


He's reported as a "resident of Tennessee."

You KNOW what that means.

Posted by: filbert at March 28, 2016 08:41 PM (s5o+q)

319 a "resident of Tennessee." You KNOW what that means

Hobo.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 08:42 PM (6FqZa)

320 And since all Apple phones are custom-made, software for one phone doesn't have any effect on other phones.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the Press - it saddens me, as head of Homeland Security - to tell you today my request to Apple to unlock Raggey McRaggHead's phone is because - well - I am gay."

Source code in three ... two ... one ...

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 08:42 PM (fiGNd)

321 321 As long as the FBI is in there poking around, think they could help me recover my old contact list?

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:40 PM (TSMoA)

That there is hilarious.

Posted by: ALH at March 28, 2016 08:42 PM (Z56vq)

322 Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:38 PM (AkOaV)

I don't need your condescension. I disagree with you. Deal with it.

Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:43 PM (MNgU2)

323 >>He's reported as a "resident of Tennessee."


Ain't no place I'd rather be!

Posted by: Jed at March 28, 2016 08:43 PM (MvFEq)

324
So if there is conviction that these sites are being monitored--and this is NOT intended to be sarcastic or facetious--why post at all when you could retreat into relative obscurity and eliminate any risk?

Posted by: irongrampa at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (P/8aq)

325 309 What's that whump, whump, whump sound I'm hearing?!
Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:35 PM (a/h6D)

--------

Depends. Did you piss off the Empress lately?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (kTF2Z)

326 Your sarcasm doesn't change the fact that the FBI did not demand Apple give them the tool to unlock the phone. They just wanted the ability to attempt the passwords without destroying the info.
Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:39 PM (MNgU2)

Whether or not the FBI or Apple had physical possession of the skeleton key makes zero difference.

Once Apple finds a way to break their own encryption, their phones are unencrypted. Any judge can issue a warrant saying "apple, now crack this phone. now this one. Now this one. Now this one."

The only reason they CANT do that right now is because Apple has no way of breaking their phones.

Is it really that hard to understand?

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (AkOaV)

327 33 >>Better? Worse? The Real Story? *shrug*

Yeah, I was on team no one. I'm OK with grand-standing Apple getting shamed even if I'm not happy about the possibility of this assisting the feds in skipping having to get subpoenas before breaking into a phone.


Posted by: Lizzy

Subpoenas for a phone owned by the government, his employer and used by a terrorist. Find something else to be unhappy about. Shouldn't be too hard.

Posted by: Dirks strewn at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (QdAXQ)

328 They just wanted the ability to attempt the passwords without destroying the info.

And their disingenuous request doesn't change the fact that any solution allowing this would work on all phones of that model, and probably earlier; and potentially later.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at March 28, 2016 08:45 PM (2lndx)

329
324 a "resident of Tennessee." You KNOW what that means

Hobo.
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 08:42 PM (6FqZa)

Can prove Fermat's Last Theorem using a ball of string and a used condom?

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 08:45 PM (MQEz6)

330 Depends. Did you piss off the Empress lately?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (kTF2Z)

Sounds like a question for Uncle Palpatine.

Haven't been on the ONT lately. Is he still around?

Posted by: Blano at March 28, 2016 08:45 PM (3eoPa)

331 I don't need your condescension. I disagree with you. Deal with it.
Posted by: Joe Hallenbeck at March 28, 2016 08:43 PM (MNgU2)

you don't need my condescension? You're wrong. 100%.

I mean i guess you can make up whatever you want to make up, but they're being purposely obtuse.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 08:46 PM (AkOaV)

332 335 haven't seen him in a while.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:46 PM (TSMoA)

333 I feel out of touch here. I just "upgraded" to a flip phone last month. I just assume that anyone who is more tech savvy than me, 99.999% of the population, is listening to my conversations.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Almost aLuddite at March 28, 2016 08:46 PM (WVsWD)

334 So if there is conviction that these sites are being monitored--and this is NOT intended to be sarcastic or facetious--why post at all when you could retreat into relative obscurity and eliminate any risk?

Posted by: irongrampa at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (P/8aq)

****

Because I don't care.

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:46 PM (a/h6D)

335 The idea that ANYthing you have in terms of communication is private in this day and age is kinda silly.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at March 28, 2016 08:47 PM (ShplO)

336 Going bullish on old statecraft shit like dead-letter drops and such.

Helpful hint to the younger kids - don't keep shit on your iPad.

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 08:47 PM (fiGNd)

337 "He's reported as a 'resident of Tennessee.' You KNOW what that means."

Earlier today, there was a sound effect like a gargantuan and powerful turbine coming up to speed, emanating from newsrooms all across America.

Then the clarification arrived. A _black_ resident of Tennessee.

Cue the turbine-slowly-winding-back-down-to-silence sound effect.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 08:47 PM (noWW6)

338 He's reported as a "resident of Tennessee."

You KNOW what that means.


*****


Working as a waiter at a BBQ joint while waiting for a recording contract with a prominent Country Music label?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 08:48 PM (NeFrd)

339 Depends. Did you piss off the Empress lately?
Posted by: Duke Lowell at March 28, 2016 08:44 PM (kTF2Z)

*****

Not to my knowledge, but sometimes I'm a little slow.

Posted by: Tim in GA at March 28, 2016 08:48 PM (a/h6D)

340 Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 08:47 PM

Heh! No shit.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at March 28, 2016 08:48 PM (ShplO)

341 an Apple a day keeps the G-man away......

Posted by: tim in guam at March 28, 2016 08:48 PM (41A2w)

342 Cellebrite....???

I used to work with their equipment when I worked in the wireless repair business. Never considered it anything capable of unlocking a iPhone's security however.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at March 28, 2016 08:50 PM (SY87i)

343 "Going bullish on old statecraft shit like dead-letter drops and such."

Tradecraft, surely.

And the Russians never stopped training their intelligence officers in it. To a meticulous level.

No amount of encryption will crack a message that's never digitized, never broadcast, never traverses a packet network, and goes completely unnoticed.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 08:50 PM (noWW6)

344 One solution is to arrange seemingly random objects appearing in the cat videos on my phone to form a special code so secret and complex that only I understand it.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:50 PM (TSMoA)

345
a "resident of Tennessee." You KNOW what that means

Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Jed

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 08:51 PM (FkBIv)

346
Look it up at Wired or Techdirt or a number of other
places. the FBI wanted the software tool to be developed and then turned
over to them. With that tool any agent can use an administrative
warrant to open a 5 series phone. I don't know where you read that the
FBI didn't want the tool, that was the point.


Cellebrite will put the iPhone cracker in the next version of their software. EVERYONE from Mayberry Sheriff's office to ATT to the US Attorney's office that has a licensed copy of Cellebrite software will get the iPhone cracker with it.

The forensics people already have Cellebrite. Apple will just change the encryption methodology in the next device.

And around it goes...

Posted by: Dr. Emilio Lizardo aka Mortimer at March 28, 2016 08:52 PM (Vjt01)

347 One bad Apple don't ruin the whole bunch, girl

Posted by: tim in yemen at March 28, 2016 08:52 PM (41A2w)

348
All the cool kids planning the revolution are using HF.

Don't need repeaters (cell towers).

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 08:53 PM (FkBIv)

349 The shooter was black? So that's why the story died less than 12 hours after it happened. Much like that guy that shot the reporter on the air. At first it was evil NRA member kills innocent woman. Must ban guns!! Must ban guns!!

What's that? He's what? Are you sure? OK.

Now in other news, check out what this adorable squirrel did this afternoon....

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 08:54 PM (0LHZx)

350 I think we should all just go back to cans and string. As soon as a way to transmit cute cat vids that can be transmitted through string is developed.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Almost a Luddite at March 28, 2016 08:54 PM (WVsWD)

351 The forensics people already have Cellebrite. Apple will just change the encryption methodology in the next device.

And around it goes...

Posted by: Dr. Emilio Lizardo aka Mortimer at March 28, 2016 08:52 PM (Vjt01)


No need to wait for the next device. apple can render the tool useless with an update to the existing devices.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 08:54 PM (zc3Db)

352
In Maigret, all the reporter have these small Leicas with the old type of flash with the silver reflecting collar. Interesting....

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 08:55 PM (iQIUe)

353 Redundant much are we?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. I need a translater. at March 28, 2016 08:56 PM (WVsWD)

354 353
All the cool kids planning the revolution are using HF.

Don't need repeaters (cell towers).
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 08:53 PM (FkBIv)
-------------------
And you can bounce a signal off an amateur satellite using a 5W 2 meter handheld.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 08:57 PM (TSMoA)

355 Eve, just leave the Apple alone.

Posted by: tim in bim ini at March 28, 2016 08:57 PM (41A2w)

356 'Ted Cruz's senate e-address was a subscriber of Ashley Madison'
http://tinyurl.com/jotbzgo
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:43 PM

Oh, I'm sure that's totes true in a dirty election cycle. /sarc

Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 08:57 PM (o/90i)

357 276 In a nation where 65% of an entire generation posts photographs of every meal they eat on TwitFace, what basis do they have to talk about privacy?
Posted by: Qoheleth at March 28, 2016 08:24 PM (iIzG7)


From what I've read, young people in general don't care about privacy. It's a foreign concept to them.

Posted by: rickl at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (sdi6R)

358 All the cool kids planning the revolution are using HF.

What is HF?

Posted by: Blano at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (3eoPa)

359 O/T. Re: Ted Cruz affair allegations. Can you imagine Ted Cruz seducing five good-looking women, five if you include his wife, whom one shouldn't mess with, with that voice. Did he debate the panties off them? No way. Although a Trump man, I'm with Cruz on this. Rubio should be ashamed of spreading this garbage. Big-eared, pipsqueaky, smarmy, talking-point memorizing turkey Rubio.

Posted by: Dirks strewn at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (QdAXQ)

360 361 'Ted Cruz's senate e-address was a subscriber of Ashley Madison'
http://tinyurl.com/jotbzgo
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:43 PM

Oh, I'm sure that's totes true in a dirty election cycle. /sarc
Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 08:57 PM (o/90i)

____

I believe it. After all a guy smart enough to graduate Harvard Law is also stupid enough to use his senate email on that site. Seems legit.

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (0LHZx)

361 363 HF = High Frequency. Shortwave radio.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:00 PM (TSMoA)

362 Inkdray ormay ovaltineyay!

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:01 PM (NeFrd)

363 I believe it. After all a guy smart enough to graduate Harvard Law is also stupid enough to use his senate email on that site. Seems legit.

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (0LHZx)


Nothing to do with Cruz, but graduating Hah-vahd Lawn School is no proof of anything. Some of the biggest idiots in the world have graduated Hah-vahd Lawn School, not to mention having been Precedent of the Hah-vahd Lawn Care Review, too.

Hah-vahd degrees are proof of nothing.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 09:02 PM (zc3Db)

364 Just back from Cheddars, where I pissed in the men's room with my my hands in my hips. Kind of weird.

Posted by: jsg at March 28, 2016 09:03 PM (BUYls)

365 Apropos of nothing....Uconn beat Mississippi state 98-38 in women's b-ball.

Now you may wonder why the fuck I know or care about women's b-ball. Well my daughter watches it and is all into the grrrrrllll power aspect of it.

Now back to our regularly scheduled program...

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 09:03 PM (0LHZx)

366 This made me think of the Pope:

https://goo.gl/5oL8J2

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 09:03 PM (iQIUe)

367 363 HF = High Frequency. Shortwave radio.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:00 PM (TSMoA)

Thank you.

Posted by: Blano at March 28, 2016 09:03 PM (3eoPa)

368 Just back from Cheddars, where I pissed in the men's room with my my hands in my hips. Kind of weird.
Posted by: jsg at March 28, 2016 09:03 PM (BUYls)
-----------
Ewwww. I thought you were supposed to put your hands ON your hips.

Posted by: bluebell at March 28, 2016 09:04 PM (2WwbN)

369
HF = High Frequency. Shortwave radio.

https://youtu.be/AL-EBWbZU8s

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 09:04 PM (FkBIv)

370 Nothing to do with Cruz, but graduating Hah-vahd Lawn School is no proof of anything. Some of the biggest idiots in the world have graduated Hah-vahd Lawn School, not to mention having been Precedent of the Hah-vahd Lawn Care Review, too.

Hah-vahd degrees are proof of nothing.
Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 09:02 PM (zc3Db)

____

You sir have the boorish manners of a Yalie. Good day to you.

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 09:04 PM (0LHZx)

371 Cellulite cracked the iphone? Heck, my legs coulda done that themselves, without the need for Jews. *hic*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at March 28, 2016 09:05 PM (++MnV)

372 "Can you imagine Ted Cruz seducing five good-looking women, five if you
include his wife, whom one shouldn't mess with, with that voice."

The other day, there were a series of comments (from ThunderB if memory serves), imagining Cruz calling a press conference in D.C. To officially own up to being a sexual superman and having had half of the women inside the Beltway rendered helpless by his animal magnetism. The hot Latin blood of tropical Cuba combined with ancient secrets de l'amour by way of freezing Francophone Canada.

They were utterly hilarious. They need to be collected and reposted.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 09:05 PM (noWW6)

373 Tradecraft, surely.

Yeah ... used wrong term. Sorry.

Just a practicing rookie.

Posted by: ScoggDog at March 28, 2016 09:05 PM (fiGNd)

374 Posted by: bluebell at March 28, 2016 09:04 PM

Ha. Damn autocorrect. And 3 Top Shelf Long Island Ice Teas.

Posted by: jsg at March 28, 2016 09:07 PM (BUYls)

375 You sir have the boorish manners of a Yalie. Good day to you.

Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 09:04 PM (0LHZx)


Heh. Touché!

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 09:07 PM (zc3Db)

376 Ted Cruz cheated on his wife?

Nope. Sorry. Not credible at all.

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 09:07 PM (MQEz6)

377 364 O/T. Re: Ted Cruz affair allegations. Can you imagine Ted Cruz seducing five good-looking women, five if you include his wife, whom one shouldn't mess with, with that voice. Did he debate the panties off them? No way. Although a Trump man, I'm with Cruz on this. Rubio should be ashamed of spreading this garbage. Big-eared, pipsqueaky, smarmy, talking-point memorizing turkey Rubio.
Posted by: Dirks strewn at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM (QdAXQ)


It probably doesn't have that much to do with looks or his voice. Many women find power an aphrodisiac, so someone in Cruz's position probably has to beat them off with a stick. It's pretty hard for a man to say no when a hot woman is throwing herself at you. It goes against every instinct we have.

Posted by: rickl at March 28, 2016 09:08 PM (sdi6R)

378

Belgian "peacekeeper" 'Mohammed N' from Molenbeek says on FB he'd ‘kill each and every Jew'

http://goo.gl/J363Cp

==============
This guy is a Belgian municipal security officer.

"The word Jew itself is dirty. If I were in Israel, frankly, I would do to the Jews what they do with the Palestinians --- slaughter each and every one of them...."

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 09:10 PM (iQIUe)

379 It's pretty hard for a man to say no when a hot woman is throwing herself at you. It goes against every instinct we have.

Posted by: rickl at March 28, 2016 09:08 PM (sdi6R)


Any expert in Jui-Jitsu would tell you that the best defense against a hot woman throwing herself at you is to not fight her momentum but merely redirect her lunge to the nearest bed and tire her out with hours of heavy sex. It's the only safe way to handle it.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 09:10 PM (zc3Db)

380 374 pretty cool!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:11 PM (e3bId)

381 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

10.

( sorry, got nuffin)

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 09:11 PM (MQEz6)

382 >>Just back from Cheddars, where I pissed in the men's room with my my hands in my hips. Kind of weird.
Posted by: jsg

Want to try it with my hands on your hips?

Posted by: John from Ohio at March 28, 2016 09:12 PM (c7vUv)

383 Can they stfu about what they can and can't do?

Posted by: Rev Al at March 28, 2016 09:12 PM (HgTBl)

384 This was all about setting up the legal precedence that local cops can get a warrant and force someone (apple) to decrypt their encryptions.

iMessage and whatsapp are next.

Posted by: Harry Paratestes at March 28, 2016 07:03 PM (AkOaV)


How about nobody puts any data on their "smart" phone that they wouldn't feel comfortable having emblazoned on the back of a bus-stop bench. Maybe a "telephone" is not the ideal platform for sensitive data, ya think?


I don't even normally program the "quick-dial" feature of my flip-phone. I have let one or two business contacts program their numbers in, because, lazy, I am. If the FBI contacts me? "Yeah, I hired ***** to lay some block for me, and paid him cash. Full stop."

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 28, 2016 09:12 PM (UsLZp)

385 "but merely redirect her lunge to the nearest bed and tire her out with hours of heavy sex. It's the only safe way to handle it."


Very wise and masterful.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at March 28, 2016 09:12 PM (SY87i)

386 Timbuktu

Posted by: sorry, just ran out of tim at March 28, 2016 09:12 PM (41A2w)

387 The shooter was black? So that's why the story died less than 12 hours after it happened.

The media's current purpose is not to inform, but to isolate and give you a false sense of security, until it is too late.

I'm hoping they will fail, since people can still communicate with others via meatspace, phone, mail, social media, blogs. The truth cannot be suppressed.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at March 28, 2016 09:13 PM (++MnV)

388 It's pretty hard for a man to say no when a hot woman is throwing herself at you.

-
My theory is he was wearing Hai Karate.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:14 PM (Nwg0u)

389 "And when you be a senator, you get it all the time."

Posted by: Jay Billington Bulworth at March 28, 2016 09:14 PM (2lndx)

390 My theory is he was wearing Hai Karate.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:14 PM (Nwg0u)
-----------
Oh my gosh, I remember those ads.

Posted by: bluebell at March 28, 2016 09:15 PM (2WwbN)

391 No way Ted Cruz could get that much tang and I'm a Cruz guy.

Posted by: Rev Al at March 28, 2016 09:17 PM (HgTBl)

392 Woo Hoo! Now I don't have to wash my hands!!!

/just the punch line.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:17 PM (NeFrd)

393 >>My theory is he was wearing Hai Karate.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks

That's where my fancy hand chops fend off women.

Posted by: John Kasich at March 28, 2016 09:18 PM (c7vUv)

394 Capitol cops shot a brother? Don't they know that BLM?

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:18 PM (e3bId)

395 Just saw an ad for Navage. What the hell? What the helling hell?

Posted by: FireHorse at March 28, 2016 09:20 PM (kQ5yx)

396 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines


10. I do not like them, Sam-I-Am. I do not like green eggs and ham.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:21 PM (NeFrd)

397 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines


9. Humperdinck, Humperdinck, Humperdinck!

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:21 PM (NeFrd)

398 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines


8. "Can I buy you another Cuba Libre?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:22 PM (NeFrd)

399 8. Initiate Plan Goober!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:22 PM (e3bId)

400 this whole story strikes me as utter BS.

the terrorists destroyed their personal phones prior to the attack... that they didn't bother with this one tells you everything you need to know. there isn't anything useful on it.

this is just the feds doing what they do best: wasting time and money while trashing our civil rights.

Posted by: redc1c4 at March 28, 2016 09:22 PM (LiPGQ)

401 My theory is he was wearing Hai Karate.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:14 PM (Nwg0u)

Be careful how you use it.

Posted by: T. Cruz, anonymous poster at March 28, 2016 09:23 PM (3eoPa)

402
It's pretty hard for a man to say no when a hot woman is throwing herself at you.

-
My theory is he was wearing Hai Karate.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:14 PM (Nwg0u)







So just kick 'em out of bed.....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 28, 2016 09:23 PM (o98Jz)

403 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

7. Solicit this, bitch!!!

Posted by: Blano at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (3eoPa)

404 Is "Plan Goober" something like Order 66?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. I need a translater. at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (WVsWD)

405
Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

7. I can go all night! I have a strong Constitution.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (o98Jz)

406 7. Would you like to see my legal briefs?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (NeFrd)

407 I cracked corn, and nobody cares.

Posted by: Jimmy at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (Z58Xa)

408 I once had sex with a woman in Reno just to watch her scream.

Posted by: Ted "Rafeal Logan" Cruz aka Fidel Danger at March 28, 2016 09:25 PM (WVsWD)

409 361 'Ted Cruz's senate e-address was a subscriber of Ashley Madison'
http://tinyurl.com/jotbzgo
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at March 28, 2016 07:43 PM

Oh, I'm sure that's totes true in a dirty election cycle. /sarc
Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 08:57 PM (o/90i)
____
I believe it. After all a guy smart enough to graduate Harvard Law is also stupid enough to use his senate email on that site. Seems legit.
Posted by: Monsieur Moo Moo at March 28, 2016 08:58 PM

Yikes that is exactly what I thought! I'm being mind hacked by Moo Moo.

Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 09:26 PM (o/90i)

410 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

10.

( sorry, got nuffin)
Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 09:11 PM (MQEz6)


"If you're a lesbian, Camille Paglia said I have an effeminate face. I will eat you out."

*hic* just taking a wild guess here. *hic*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at March 28, 2016 09:26 PM (++MnV)

411 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

8. I like my women the way I like my church pews, horizontal.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:26 PM (Nwg0u)

412 409 Is "Plan Goober" something like Order 66?
Posted by: Tim in Illinois. I need a translater. at March 28, 2016 09:24 PM (WVsWD)

I never get invited to staff meetings. Sigh.

Posted by: "Same thing we do every night Pinky...." at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (J3UIw)

413 So, will Apple raise a pouty counter-claim? "We don't believe that our security can be defeated!"

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (Z58Xa)

414 But this vision of homogeneous, altruistic Nordic lands is mostly a fantasy. The choices Nordic countries have made have little to do with altruism or kinship. Rather, Nordic people have made their decisions out of self-interest. Nordic nations offer their citizens -- all of their citizens, but especially the middle class -- high-quality services that save people a lot of money, time, and trouble. This is what Americans fail to understand: My taxes in Finland were used to pay for top-notch services .. for me.

Posted by: James T Kirk at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (e8kgV)

415 409 Had to look that up - it fits!

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (e3bId)

416 5. "Everything's bigger in Texas!"

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (NeFrd)

417 Picture of Capitol Hill shooter :

http://www.weaselzippers.us/?p=264136

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 09:28 PM (FkBIv)

418 I never get invited to staff meetings. Sigh.

Posted by: "Same thing we do every night Pinky...." at March 28, 2016 09:27 PM (J3UIw)

Al least you know there are staff meetings.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. We have more ex Gub'nors, per capita, in the pen than any other state. at March 28, 2016 09:29 PM (WVsWD)

419 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines


Have you ever fucked a Canadian?

Posted by: Jed at March 28, 2016 09:30 PM (MvFEq)

420 4. Let's go to your place and pursue happiness.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:30 PM (Nwg0u)

421 416 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

7. "Yeah, baby, I speak Canadian."

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 09:31 PM (MQEz6)

422 Does Plan Goober involve banjos? If so, I ain't going for it.

Posted by: Ned Beatty at March 28, 2016 09:31 PM (Z58Xa)

423 Picture of Capitol Hill shooter :

http://www.weaselzippers.us/?p=264136

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at March 28, 2016 09:28 PM (FkBIv)



A picture the MFM will never run and a story it will soon bury

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 28, 2016 09:31 PM (45oDG)

424 nuke from orbit?

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:32 PM (2PZWx)

425 "Everything's bigger in Texas!"
Posted by: Seamus Muldoon
-------------

Especially Alaska.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:32 PM (Z58Xa)

426 Top 10 Ted Cruz pickup lines:
Say hello to the Cruz missile!

Posted by: Josephistan at March 28, 2016 09:32 PM (7qAYi)

427 3. Wanna see my Iowa caucus?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:32 PM (Nwg0u)

428 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

I'n Tony Montana. The worl' is mine.

Posted by: FireHorse at March 28, 2016 09:33 PM (kQ5yx)

429 3. I can filibuster for over 12 hours, IYKWIMAITYD!

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:33 PM (NeFrd)

430 I for one, feel so much safer now that the government can crack the security on a communication device of a dead terrorist after he's killed his victims.

Thank you Barry and thank your wonderful FBI.

Posted by: Fritz at March 28, 2016 09:33 PM (+E2Y7)

431 Jooz. Is there anything they can't do?

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at March 28, 2016 09:33 PM (0mRoj)

432 Syracuse crackr\ed the code brosephus.

Posted by: eleven at March 28, 2016 09:34 PM (qUNWi)

433 Top Ten Ted Cruz Pickup Lines:

I can go all night, baby. You saw that filibuster, right?

Posted by: Josephistan at March 28, 2016 09:34 PM (7qAYi)

434 427 Does Plan Goober involve banjos? If so, I ain't going for it.
Posted by: Ned Beatty at March 28, 2016 09:31 PM (Z58Xa)
-------------------
Negative, Negative, Negative - That's Plan Gomer.

Posted by: Weasel at March 28, 2016 09:34 PM (e3bId)

435 Either way, cracked or not cracked, the result is actually pretty good.

Bad guys are left in doubt.

Posted by: sippin_bourbon at March 28, 2016 09:34 PM (Gl74b)

436 I don't think the Jews could build the pyramids.

Just sayin.....

Posted by: eleven at March 28, 2016 09:36 PM (qUNWi)

437 416 Top Ten Ted Cruz Seduction Lines

7. "Yeah, baby, I speak Canadian."

Posted by: eman at March 28, 2016 09:31 PM (MQEz6)

It's "I speak Canadian, eh."

Posted by: Blano at March 28, 2016 09:36 PM (3eoPa)

438 2. Aut vestri locus meus?

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 09:36 PM (BO/km)

439 Where's CAC and his stellar acumen?

After all there is Comet 252P/LINEAR to discuss.

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:37 PM (2PZWx)

440 After all there is Comet 252P/LINEAR to discuss.


Is that SMOD?

Posted by: eleven at March 28, 2016 09:38 PM (qUNWi)

441 1. "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold...


...a series of congressional hearings investigating harassment in government?"

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:38 PM (NeFrd)

442 Either way, cracked or not cracked, the result is actually pretty good.
--------------

If this administration had the slightest bit of experience or insight, they would keep their mouths shut about successes on the terrorist front, rather than publicly crowing about it.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:38 PM (ANVXm)

443 SMOD? Not really. Just a 750ft wide harbinger perhaps? Supposed to miss by a few million miles.

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:39 PM (2PZWx)

444 Aut vestri locus meus?


right?

Posted by: eleven at March 28, 2016 09:39 PM (qUNWi)

445 @441 He wasn't, he was Tyrian, and pretty good at keeping a secret, too.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 09:40 PM (xq1UY)

446 If this administration had the slightest bit of experience or insight, they would keep their mouths shut about successes on the terrorist front, rather than publicly crowing about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer
------------------

Imagine Bletchley Park during WWII announcing, "Hey! We've cracked the Enigma coding!"

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:41 PM (ANVXm)

447 SMOD? Not really. Just a 750ft wide harbinger perhaps? Supposed to miss by a few million miles.


Just enough to get Hawaii wet?

Posted by: eleven at March 28, 2016 09:41 PM (qUNWi)

448 So it appears that last Tuesday night's Atlas V launch sending a Cygnus cargo ship to the ISS came very close to failure.

http://preview.tinyurl.com/jhyxj4h

There was some sort of problem with the fuel/oxygen mixture in the first stage, and the engine shut down 5.4 seconds early when it ran out of liquid oxygen. This meant that the much smaller second stage engine had to burn about 80 seconds longer than planned to make up for the performance shortfall.

The second stage shut down, the spacecraft separated, and a little while later the second stage reignited for an 11 second deorbit burn. It lasted only 3 seconds before running out of fuel. It did deorbit, but it came down outside the target area.

This means it was running on fumes when it shut down the first time to put Cygnus into orbit. It has been calculated that if the first stage had shut down one second before it did, the second stage would have been unable to achieve orbit.

Posted by: rickl at March 28, 2016 09:42 PM (sdi6R)

449 @443
Locus vestrus aut meus
is what you're trying to say.
--Furthermore Carthage

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 09:43 PM (xq1UY)

450 rickl, so we could have had live Cannibals in Space instead of The Walking Dead?

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:44 PM (2PZWx)

451 We have Plan Goober and Plan Gomer that we know of. The Paulian in me insists that Plan Jetro is lurking somewhere ready to come bubblin up to the surface.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. We have more ex Gub'nors, per capita, in the pen than any other state. at March 28, 2016 09:44 PM (WVsWD)

452 It has been calculated that if the first stage had shut down one second before it did, the second stage would have been unable to achieve orbit.


*****

I just hate it when that happens on a first date.

Posted by: Ted Cruz-anova at March 28, 2016 09:45 PM (NeFrd)

453 Well Plan "Jetro" was obviously a cypherin problem.

Or was it?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. We have more ex Gub'nors, per capita, in the pen than any other state. at March 28, 2016 09:45 PM (WVsWD)

454 Jetro was the name of the hillbilly cousin in the Jetsons.

Posted by: Josephistan at March 28, 2016 09:46 PM (7qAYi)

455 As for seeing the comet, get the binoculars and encamp in a dark area. For Tuesday morning about 90 minutes before down looking south towards Sagittarius one might glimpse the green comet.

Wait a minute, is it cyanide out-gassing that makes it appear green?

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:46 PM (2PZWx)

456 Veni vidi vici.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:46 PM (Nwg0u)

457 Those Western Rifle Pooters guys are all sorts of retahded. Just sayin'.

I feel like I was Rick Rolled to the nuthouse.

Party foul at the least.

Posted by: Grump928(C) says Free Soothie! at March 28, 2016 09:46 PM (rwI+c)

458 We have Plan Goober and Plan Gomer that we know of. The Paulian in me insists that Plan Jetro is lurking somewhere ready to come bubblin up to the surface.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. We have more ex Gub'nors, per capita, in the pen than any other state. at March 28, 2016 09:44 PM (WVsWD)



How about Plan Otis? Which is to get blind drunk

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 28, 2016 09:47 PM (45oDG)

459 451 If this administration had the slightest bit of experience or insight, they would keep their mouths shut about successes on the terrorist front, rather than publicly crowing about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer
------------------

Imagine Bletchley Park during WWII announcing, "Hey! We've cracked the Enigma coding!"
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:41 PM (ANVXm)

Pffff, we are the smart kids.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 09:47 PM (voOPb)

460 Asteroidbilly?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Nope! No Hillbillies here. We call them something else. at March 28, 2016 09:47 PM (WVsWD)

461 For some uncommonly accepted definitions of 'smart'

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:48 PM (2PZWx)

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 09:50 PM (NeFrd)

463 See WZ. Bernie is Jesus.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:50 PM (Nwg0u)

464 If Bernie is Yeshua, then can he walk across the water?

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:51 PM (2PZWx)

465 That, Seamus, is one of the most abstruse comments you have ever made.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:51 PM (ANVXm)

466 !

Posted by: Marcel Marceau at March 28, 2016 09:52 PM (rwI+c)

467 Katshit is a fucking asshole times eleventy!!!
That is all.....

Posted by: lindafell de spair at March 28, 2016 09:53 PM (xVgrA)

468 Muldoon, the strong silent type

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 09:53 PM (voOPb)

469 If Bernie is Yeshua, then can he walk across the water?

-
Does he weigh more than a duck?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 09:54 PM (Nwg0u)

470 Well he does weigh more than a newt.

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:54 PM (2PZWx)

471 @473 Shhh.
He's...rolling.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 09:55 PM (xq1UY)

472 They just had some Clinonista mouthpiece on w/ M McCallum. He said there was NO evidence that her private serve was hacked.

Well, I might just say DUHHH, that's what hackers do, do their job and leave no evidence. He's a particular annoying POS apologist for her, don't recall his name but he comes across a lame idiot.

Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 09:55 PM (o/90i)

473 Got it Stringer

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 09:55 PM (voOPb)

474
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:56 PM (rwI+c)

475 GD Ace is dumb
Posted by: Ivanka
----------------------

Now, there is a comment fraught with irony.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 09:57 PM (ANVXm)

476
Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting
Those kicks were fast as lightning
In fact, it was a little bit frightening
But they fought with expert timing

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:57 PM (rwI+c)

477
There was funky China men from funky Chinatown
They were chopping them up
They were chopping them down
It's an ancient Chinese art
And everybody knew their part
From a fainting, to a slip
And a kickin' from the hip
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting
Those kids were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
But they fought with expert timing

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:57 PM (rwI+c)

478 I wonder if there is a market for explicitly "dumb" phones? Meaning a cellphone, with no memory at all, other than what little is required for it to know its own number. No applications, no camera, no GPS, no Web browser, no text services, no anything that could potentially compromise the user's security. In other words, a cellphone that is operationally indistinguishable from the standard Western Electric desk set of 70 years ago.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (UsLZp)

479
There was funky Billie Chin and little Sammy Chong
He said, here comes the big boss, let's get it on
We took the bow and made a stand
Started swaying with the hand
A sudden motion made me skip
Now we're into a brand new trip

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (rwI+c)

480 Lanny Davis?
Farmer, he is such a butt boi for the Clintons

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (voOPb)

481
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting
Those kids were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
But they did it with expert timing

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (rwI+c)

482 Uh oh, Grumpy is gonna Wang Chung tonight

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (2PZWx)

483
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh, ha
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh, ha
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh-ha
Keep on, keep on, keep on
Sure enough
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting
Those kids were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
Make sure you have expert timing
Kung Fu fighting, had to be fast as lightning

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (rwI+c)

484 Uh oh, Grumpy is gonna Wang Chung tonight

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (2PZWx)


And half an hour later, he's gonna want to do it again.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 28, 2016 09:59 PM (UsLZp)

485 I wonder if there is a market for explicitly "dumb" phones? Meaning a cellphone, with no
memory at all, other than what little is required for it to know its
own number. No applications, no camera, no GPS, no Web browser, no text
services, no anything that could potentially compromise the user's
security. In other words, a cellphone that is operationally
indistinguishable from the standard Western Electric desk set of 70
years ago.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM (UsLZp)


I have a Nokia TracPhone. It offers a timer, alarms, texting and you can make calls from it.
Also the Jitterbug.

Posted by: Kindltot at March 28, 2016 10:00 PM (XQHkt)

486 463 We have Plan Goober and Plan Gomer that we know of. The Paulian in me insists that Plan Jetro is lurking somewhere ready to come bubblin up to the surface.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. We have more ex Gub'nors, per capita, in the pen than any other state. at March 28, 2016 09:44 PM (WVsWD)



How about Plan Otis? Which is to get blind drunk

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 28, 2016 09:47 PM (45oDG)


It's going to be Mirror Universe Sheriff Andy Taylor, and you had better have ze papers when he asks you. Because rubber hoses don't break themselves, you know.

Posted by: Top Secret! The Movie at March 28, 2016 10:01 PM (J3UIw)

487 "What th..."
--Mike Nomad, stoned on opium in room above Mah Jongg's

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 10:01 PM (xq1UY)

488 Now I'm in the mood to watch BTiLC.

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 10:02 PM (rwI+c)

489 'Locus vestrus aut meus'

Yea what he said.

Posted by: freaked at March 28, 2016 10:03 PM (BO/km)

490 "I wonder if there is a market for explicitly 'dumb' phones? Meaning a cellphone, with no
memory at all, other than what little is required for it to know its
own number. No applications, no camera, no GPS, no Web browser, no text
services, no anything that could potentially compromise the user's
security."

A friend of mine was toting around a very early digital flip phone for years. It might notionally have been SMS text compatible, but he was on an ancient rate plan which didn't even make accommodation for that. He was happy.

At one point he got a call from his carrier, who told him to either come turn it in for a newer model, or accept having his contract pulled, because the feds were now mandating that they implement the e-9-1-1 location protocol in all handsets.

Posted by: torquewrench at March 28, 2016 10:04 PM (noWW6)

491 g'early evenin', 'rons

Posted by: AltonJackson at March 28, 2016 10:04 PM (KCxzN)

492 Timer! Texting! I'll bet you never even chewed bark off trees.
An onion hanging from my belt has more features than mycellphone!
(Has a handset, though. Y'otta see'em in the gross-ry store.)

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 28, 2016 10:04 PM (xq1UY)

493
Mr. Bean's Maigret is excellent.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at March 28, 2016 10:04 PM (iQIUe)

494 I figured the FBI saw their legal case wasn't going to make it, and invented the 'we can crack it' story as a graceful way out, without jeopardizing further issues of this nature.

I still think that.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at March 28, 2016 10:05 PM (O4NI/)

495 Well if the FBI doesn't have enough brains to indict Hillary they sure as hell ain't smart enough to crack an iPhone

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 10:06 PM (voOPb)

496 I think that the Israeli silicon Valley in the Negev cracked it. Like a peanut

Posted by: ThunderB at March 28, 2016 10:06 PM (kvLap)

497 I hate when people have nonsensical coupons. I wanted to buy 1K of cheap 308 and LAX ammo is running a special. Spend 150+ get $10 off. Spend $250, get $15 off. 500 rds is 169 with $21 shipping. 2 X that has $42 shipping so no price break.

It's better to place 2 orders and save $20 than one and save $15.

CraZy

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 10:06 PM (rwI+c)

498 I'd sworn off using anything by Apple years ago. But my family keeps buying that stuff for me for Christmas and birthdays and all. This 'being a parent' and 'being a husband' are tougher than i thought.

Posted by: Eve's Husband at March 28, 2016 10:08 PM (O4NI/)

499 I have a Nokia TracPhone. It offers a timer, alarms, texting and you can make calls from it.
Also the Jitterbug.

Posted by: Kindltot at March 28, 2016 10:00 PM (XQHkt)


I've been using the same motorola flip phone (slide, really) for ... I don't know ... almost ten years, maybe. It has your basic phone, a camera, can text (or send pictures, which I never do), and the feature I use it for most is the alarm clock (which has now decided that it might or might not actually ring at the appointed times). That's all I need in a mobile phone. Don't want anything else. And I've let my voice mailbox fill up so no one tries to bug me with stupid voice mails that I never listen to.

Phone, text, camera, alarm. That's all I need or want in a cell phone.

Posted by: ThePrimoridalOrderedPair at March 28, 2016 10:08 PM (zc3Db)

500 and why didn't you come to me like a fucking man and tell me there was a new thread??

Posted by: Grump928(C) notes that we are so fucking boned at March 28, 2016 10:08 PM (rwI+c)

501 This just in! Margaret Cho is NOT funny!

http://tinyurl.com/hngvodh

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks at March 28, 2016 10:09 PM (Nwg0u)

502 Samsung flip phone here. Does what I need a phone to do.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at March 28, 2016 10:09 PM (NeFrd)

503 It's better to place 2 orders and save $20 than one and save $15.

CraZy

Posted by: Grump
---------------

Did I ever tell you the story about offering TWO Mazda 323's for $500, or one for $600?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 10:10 PM (ANVXm)

504 so the FBI is outsourcing their hacking jobs

Posted by: Wing_attack_Plan_R at March 28, 2016 10:10 PM (iave7)

505 so the FBI is outsourcing their hacking jobs
---------

Bonus for Mossad; free info.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at March 28, 2016 10:12 PM (ANVXm)

506 ONT up.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at March 28, 2016 10:12 PM (uURQL)

507 What makes a phone so special? The FBI can go to court and get a subpoena to look in your files, your bank records, just about anything. What is the rational that says a cell phone is uniquely exempt from search under a court order?
Posted by: JackStraw at March 28, 2016 07:09 PM (/tuJf)


A search warrant doesn't require my cooperation. That they can search my house doesn't mean that I have to open it to them: that just means they would have the right to break in. If the warrant allows them to search my safe, I don't have to open it for them: it just means they have the right to break into it.

My life would probably be easier if I would cooperate, but I'm not obliged to cooperate.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at March 28, 2016 10:16 PM (O4NI/)

508 Lanny Davis?
Farmer, he is such a butt boi for the Clintons
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at March 28, 2016 09:58 PM

No MH, some younger douchebag. He has a face you really wanna punch, even more so than that slimebag Lanny. I'm thinking it's Richard somethingsuckingHilary'sazz.

Posted by: Farmer at March 28, 2016 10:17 PM (o/90i)

509 I suspect an Apple insider helped and this is all a face saver

Posted by: Evi L. Bloggerlady at March 28, 2016 10:27 PM (hUf3d)

510 Apple's new CEO is now howling with rage like Plankton.

Posted by: DM at March 28, 2016 11:00 PM (Ulmds)

511
So, you didn't actually *need* Apple to do squat for you, eh DoJ? unlike what you said in your legal bleggings?

JUST LIKE I FUCKING TOLD YOU? so sod off, DoJ. Go come up with a novel way to not prosecute Hillary.

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at March 29, 2016 09:33 AM (1hM1d)

512 Here's another not-good but possible idea: Apple and the Justice Department worked out a secret deal wherein Apple would crack the phone in exchange for the Justice Department saying that someone other than Apple cracked it.

It would be a in-win deal for both. The feds would get access to the cellphone logs of the terrorist, and Apple would 1) keep their reputation as a company that will fight tooth-and-nail for their customers' privacy, and 2) keep the security of their iPhones intact (for the time being, at least), inasmuch as the "key" to unlocking the encrypted data would be Apple's alone.

Posted by: Kutsen Burns at March 29, 2016 02:45 PM (Ff2Dm)

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