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White Dude Couldn't Get His Poem Published Anywhere, So He Resubmits It Under Name Yi-Fen Chou; Not Only Is It Published, But It's Now Being Collected in Book of America's Best Poems, 2015
The left is only interested in talking about a couple of them, though. The guy's real name is Hudson.Hudson’s critics said the literary bait-and-switch was fraudulent, racist and fundamentally different from Charlotte Bronte publishing "Jane Eyre" under the name Currer Bell. "When you're doing this from a position of entitlement, you're appropriating an ethnic identity that’s one, imaginary, and two, doesn't have access to the literary world," poet and Chapman University professor Victoria Chang told The Washington Post. "And it diminishes categorically all of our accomplishments. He sort of implies that minorities are published because we’re minorities, not because of our work. That's just insulting because it strips everything we’ve worked so hard for." Phil Yu, the blogger better known as Angry Asian Man, wrote "if there is such a thing as employing yellowface in poetry, this has to be it."But if this poem was serially rejected when it was submitted under a White Guy Name, only to be then published and feted as one of the best poems of the year under a Chinese Name, then that undermines this claim that minorities don't have some "entitlement" and special access here. That's one of the most emotional tensions of Affirmative Action: the left pushes for it, but then wants to pretend no one at all has ever benefited from it (that is, that no one ever got special consideration for it). The only time it can be acknowledged that minorities get a boost from Affirmative Action is when white liberals festoon each other with awards for boosting minorities at their various awards-giving ceremonies. But only white liberals giving another white liberal a prize can admit that Affirmative Action has any actual beneficiaries; for anyone to acknowledge this is racist. One little interesting thing: The editor of the volume is keeping the poem in, despite the controversy, reasoning that a poem stands or falls on its own merits, and if the acknowledgment of excellence was suddenly withdrawn, it would raise a lot of questions about the poetry community's standards. I find this kind of thing interesting, how one's estimation of a work of art can change so much when one finds out that one's understanding of who wrote it is suddenly challenged. It's not supposed to matter who wrote something -- but I think actually it does, more than even non-SJWs admit. The Poem: Via Jazz Shaw, here's part of the poem:
Huh! That bumblebee looks ridiculous staggering its way across those blue flowers, the ones I can neverWell I don't think that's very good at all. It's got a touch of I Love Science! (TM) to it, plus some annoying authorial interjections that sound like Carrie in Sex and the City adding her stupid observations to everything. In fact, he himself lampshades the voiceover by asking if he's supposed to add a voiceover to his experience. Answer: You probably shouldn't. You know, the poem itself is your reflection upon your experience; you shouldn't add reflections upon your experience into the reflection upon your experience.
remember the name of. Do you know the old engineer's joke: that, theoretically, bees can't fly? But they look so perfect together, like Absolute Purpose incarnate: one bee
plus one blue flower equals about a billion years of symbiosis. Which leads me to wonder what it is I'm doing here, peering through a lens at the thigh-pouches
stuffed with pollen and the baffling intricacies of stamen and pistil. Am I supposed to say something, add
a soundtrack and voiceover?
"Thigh-pouches" strikes me both as trying too hard and not trying hard enough. It puts a powerful image in my mind: the image of a poet looking way too pleased with himself for shabby sophomore-level work. So I'd be kind of surprised if this unremarkable poem did not get some extra points for coming from A Historically Excluded Minority Who Probably Comes From a Different Poetry-Tradition Than We In the West Do So We Can't Fully Appreciate The Dumb Crap He Says. In fact, the editor of the Best American Poetry volume admits that, noting that he was "more amenable" to this terrible, terrible poem due to his misbelief that a Chinese guy had written it. Frankly, I see far better Chinese poetry in Chinese restaurant menu item naming. I like imagist poetry, but this seems like a really lazy stab at it. Instead of describing the blue flowers, he just calls them "blue," and says he always forgets what they're called. That last bit seems to me just a cutesy Carrie Bradshaw look at me instead of the flowers bit of laziness. What are their blooms like? Are they bells, little balls, splays of open petals? The only description of the bees is "staggering" and "thigh-pouches." "Staggering" is pretty lazy too, since bees are frequently described as "drunkenly stumbling" from flower to flower. Pretty SOP Bee Imagery, you know. Everything else is about the poet himself, what he can and can't remember and jokes he's heard but doesn't quite relate. Just not very good at all.
Comments
(Jump to bottom of comments)Posted by: Hutson at September 08, 2015 03:32 PM (Vf5rR)
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 08, 2015 03:32 PM (EBoCD)
Posted by: BunkerintheBurbs at September 08, 2015 03:32 PM (WDySP)
Posted by: Hillary Clinton at September 08, 2015 03:32 PM (HSmrB)
That said, the "who" on who wrote it makes sense in some contexts. Something written by someone very young may not compare to something written by a seasoned writer, but could still be noteworthy because of where it came from. That has an implicit (and sometimes explicit) asterisk that it was good for someone so young.
In this case, the question is -- was the excellence of the poem only because it was good work for a person of color? Or is it that it was always good work, and people simply refuse to acknowledge good work from white people?
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 08, 2015 03:34 PM (EBoCD)
Posted by: Sarah Palin at September 08, 2015 03:34 PM (Vf5rR)
But yeah...minorities are always stepped on in every way in modern America. Amiright?
Can only get published by pretending to be white.
Or...did I get that backwards?
Posted by: David at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (UtRhK)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (2Ojst)
Ho Lee Fuk.
The best Jerry..THE BEST
Posted by: Bruce at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (8ikIW)
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (o+SC1)
Posted by: joe at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (KUaJL)
White Guy Name, only to be then published and feted as one of the best
poems of the year under a Chinese Name, then that undermines this claim
that minorities don't have some "entitlement" and special access here.
Dayum, ain't that some sh*t?
Posted by: Al Sharpton at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (e8ge6)
The bigotry of low expectations extends to poetry.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Wun Hung Low at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (ZHZBE)
Incredible!
Posted by: Elizabeth Warren at September 08, 2015 03:37 PM (BKV7y)
Many moons ago
With its flowing streams and buffalo
Now bitter tears are our harvest.
Posted by: Princess Elizabeth Warren at September 08, 2015 03:37 PM (UlJ3l)
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:37 PM (eEBON)
What's more interesting -- and troubling to me -- is intentionally excluding work that is objectively good or even great because it is done by a white person (or as in scifi, someone of a different political persuasion or whatever). That is Orwellian; it is intentionally crushing beautiful things simply because beautiful things aren't allowed to exist. That's a culture-wide insult.
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (EBoCD)
Posted by: Make America Great Again at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (LXJ1e)
Posted by: estelle costanza at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (5DdVJ)
Clearing the gatekeeper is nearly always the hardest step in publishing traditional-style. Once that's been done, the content can be judged on its merits, and not before.
Posted by: Sporkatus at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (HtLSE)
I'm unclear how this is different than Dolezal or the BLM dude. An
individual is profiting because they can pretend to be a different race.
Posted by: joe at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (KUaJL)
You have a point!
Posted by: Elizabeth Warren at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (Vf5rR)
Those quotes in the story are beautiful in how they expose the ugliness of it all.
Posted by: OneEyedJack at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (kKHcp)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (88fBD)
Hudson-Fen Chou? I wouldn't make such a big deal about this. People use different first names (or last, in the case of Oriental names) all the time.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Hugo Award Voters at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (9TK8E)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (OSs/l)
There is real discrimination against Asians in the U.S., but it happens mainly in universities which require Asian applicants to score far higher than any black or hispanic applicants, and slightly higher than white applicants. That's where Asians should be directing their ire, not at white poets who are just trying to get a fair shot at getting their work published.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (a31sM)
Posted by: RinglingBros., Barnum & Bailey at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (8CdUx)
------
Other than Clarence Thomas.
Posted by: SH at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (gmeXX)
Posted by: Chi - The New Sheriff Inn at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (XeiJX)
Posted by: Yo! at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (GwIKd)
Many moons ago
With its flowing streams and buffalo
Now bitter tears are our harvest.
Posted by: Princess Elizabeth Warren at September 08, 2015 03:37 PM (UlJ3l)
Bitter tears, and of course, tenure.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (oKE6c)
As a white male author, let me tell you how thrilled I am at that.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (88fBD)
But it is interesting that the editor seems to have chosen the poem because of a Leftist approved dedication to exoticism, he's excoriated by the Left for sticking with the choice.
The Left here couldn't be more clear; POLITICS UBER ALLES.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (JmGFJ)
I'm unclear how this is different than Dolezal or the BLM dude. An
individual is profiting because they can pretend to be a different race.
Posted by: joe at September 08, 2015 03:36 PM (KUaJL)
You have a point!
Posted by: Elizabeth Warren
________
And how!
Posted by: Ward Churchill at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (UlJ3l)
IOW, not different at all?
We should start having blind literary submissions to just about everything at this point I guess.
Posted by: Lea at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (lIU4e)
That's WHY they're complaining about it.
Posted by: Not Mitt Romney at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (TULs6)
This is what the Left has been pushing for decades. You can say/do/value something that that other guy can't because of who you are.
These " emperor has no clothes" moments for this progressive sliding scale of values keep piling up with every Dolezal, etc.
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 03:40 PM (ZHZBE)
Posted by: maddogg at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (xWW96)
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (eEBON)
No entitlement or anything. The committee was just incredibly impressed taht a Chinaman could write in English using "L"s. It is a spectacular feat.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Chi - The New Sheriff Inn at September 08, 2015 03:39 PM (XeiJX)
There are eight hundred thousand people writing poetry for every person who reads it.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (88fBD)
Posted by: Insomniac at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (2Ojst)
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (8XRCm)
He's apparently not a fan.
Posted by: f2000 at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (5xwgn)
Posted by: Zorba the Greek at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (l3vZN)
Few people like being told that they are being accommodated because everyone else feels sorry for them and wants to feel better about themselves, sort of like how when you were a kid you might let your little brother win a game because you feel sorry for his ineptitude and mom said she'd ground you if didn't let him win once in a while.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Chi at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (XeiJX)
woman or gay or whatever) is patronizing and insulting. Obviously. But
it's insulting to that person and indicates that the work is, in itself,
substandard. It's a personal insult, as it were.
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (EBoCD)
And how, precisely, is that different from having womens' divisions in tennis, golf, volleyball, and even chess?
Show your work.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:42 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:41 PM (eEBON)
If it reminds you of Walt Whitman, it sucks the tap root to poetic hell. He was the worst, by far, I EVER read.
Posted by: maddogg at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (xWW96)
You need the ghetto-black name to get into college, the Chinese name to publish poetry, what else?
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (o+SC1)
the result was that no Afros were chosen, so they voided the results and held new auditions with no stinkin' screens.
Posted by: Ringling Bros., Barnum & Bailey at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (8CdUx)
Posted by: Spellcheck at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (j+aWk)
Posted by: RoyalOil at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (ZvKdv)
Posted by: Insomniac at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (2Ojst)
Posted by: ed gibbon at September 08, 2015 03:44 PM (5DdVJ)
Everyone needs several names, apparently.
You need the ghetto-black name to get into college, the Chinese name to publish poetry, what else?
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (o+SC1)
Your plain old white guy name to cash all those white privilege dividend checks.
Posted by: rebel flounder at September 08, 2015 03:44 PM (Vf5rR)
For a Progressive there is a moral imperative to be a patronizing snot. You can feel superior to both the object of your "charity" and the knuckle-dragging conservatives.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (hLRSq)
Though that never seems to happen with pedophiles and pederasts, which I find interesting.
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (CGjum)
Posted by: Bill Shakespeare at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (8TdcF)
Im going to watch this story with a jaundiced eye.
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (8XRCm)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (OSs/l)
Just sayin'
Posted by: Daybrother unleashed at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (jpjzh)
Posted by: deach by bunga-bunga at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (8CdUx)
The fact is that the real minority in the world is white people. By miles.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (qCMvj)
Posted by: dfbaskwill at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (zllbf)
Show your work.
Posted by: Jay Guevara
______________
Oh! My! God! Did you see that?! A lefthanded layup!
Posted by: Women's Basketball Announcer at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (UlJ3l)
Posted by: Hank at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (kHkDb)
You need the ghetto-black name to get into college, the Chinese name to publish poetry, what else?
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (o+SC1)
Better have an Eskimo name for a fishing license in Alaska.
Posted by: jwest at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (Zs4uk)
Posted by: death by bunga-bunga at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (8CdUx)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk
_________________________________________________
And yet, every single one of us knows verbatim the most famous Chinese poem ever written.
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (eEBON)
Those kicks were fast as lightning
In fact, it was a little bit frightening
But they fought with expert timing
Posted by: Bruce at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (8ikIW)
Posted by: Jackie Chan at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (ZHZBE)
If you're trying to get into college the LAST thing you want is a Chinese name.
http://www.latimes.com/local/california/la-me-adv-asian-race-tutoring-20150222-story.html
Not a new article, but a definite wedge issue here in California between the Latino powers in the Democrat Party and the Asians who are Democrat because that's where the power's been in the urban areas they mostly live in.
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (o+SC1)
Posted by: Max Rockatanksy at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (Ok9RO)
Posted by: 11B40 at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (abx5/)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (OSs/l)
-------
So We spun him around.
Around and around
And he's still "disoriented" to this day.
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 03:43 PM (o+SC1)
Don't look at me.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: JoeF. at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (OcYFi)
Posted by: The Vogons at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (zgHLA)
Posted by: ace at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (dciA+)
Posted by: Bossy Conservative....lost in America at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (RFeQD)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (88fBD)
Hispanic name for employment purposes.
Posted by: Brother Cavil, down with Eph 6:12-13 at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (9krrF)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (zc3Db)
Relatively speaking, of course.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (zc3Db)
I think womens sports are separate because of their physical difference. Female athletes just can't perform at the same level as male athletes (comparing the top athletes for both genders), which is why the women marathoners always come in after the male winner, etc. For chess, I got nothing.
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: ed gibbon at September 08, 2015 03:44 PM (5DdVJ)
Stop stealin' my sh*t, man
Posted by: Willie B Yeats at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (8CdUx)
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (oDCMR)
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (eEBON)
----
Ricky Ticky Tembo???
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: Wi Tu Lo at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (2Ocf1)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (CGjum)
*recalls the Skoal Affair*
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (9mTYi)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (CGjum)
I'm planning to boycott him forever.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (88fBD)
I shall publish as The Shredder!
Also good for working under Democrat administrations.
Posted by: Brother Cavil, down with Eph 6:12-13 at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (9krrF)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (kff5f)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (kff5f)
I think womens sports are separate because of their physical difference. Female athletes just can't perform at the same level as male athletes (comparing the top athletes for both genders), which is why the women marathoners always come in after the male winner, etc. For chess, I got nothing.
--------------------
You would think boobies would give them an advantage at chess.
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (oDCMR)
Posted by: I Am Groot at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (kff5f)
poem added, with criticism
Posted by: ace at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (dciA+)
I'd hate to see the white crap that did not make the cut.
Posted by: rebel flounder at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (Vf5rR)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (ZHZBE)
Posted by: OCD 'Ron at September 08, 2015 03:50 PM (7h/1w)
Posted by: X at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (xGNLA)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (NOIQH)
this is tricky
If you follow the progression of an artist from birth to death, sometimes the work in between, or "studies" that stand alone look that way.
I had more appreciation for Picasso after going through the Picasso museum - his early years - in Spain. Knocked my socks off.
Some of the work artists do became abstract only after a lot of realism, or realism to expressionism, etc.
People will pay for the artist, versus the piece. Always jockeying for the "collection" in the end. Buying a piece here a piece there.
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (qCMvj)
Very good!; Next time please submit it under an non European ethnic name,
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (OSs/l)
--------------
There was a young lady from Madras?
No, wait, that's Indian.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (9mTYi)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say
They saw his deceit rather tawdry
When he couldn't do laundry
And drove on the road the right way
Posted by: Insomniac at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (2Ojst)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (NOIQH)
But it's not just that. There are women's categories in non-physical competitions, too, like chess, pool, ... and women still can't beat the men.
Of course, I'm all for women's tennis because the Eastern European babes wouldn't be allowed to wear their hot mini-skirts if they played in the men's league, which is the only real interest in women's tennis.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (zc3Db)
And just a little while ago, a Black lady who works in our office walked by talking to someone else, say how much she liked "Blazing Saddles", as it was....get this...funny.
A lot of Black Americans think "Blazing Saddles" is funny, yet, it could not be made today, with the same dialogue, etc.
What a wretched collection of wimpies we've become.
Posted by: Bossy Conservative....lost in America at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (RFeQD)
Oh here's something I've been screeching about for freaking ever.
Look, knowing an author's background and views and blah blah blah can be interesting to inform a view of the background in which the work was created. However, the work ultimately stands on its own and should be judged on its own.
That being said, if something is presented as autobiographical and it turns out that it's not, well, that is a piece of information that is fundamental to the interpretation of the work.
Look, this is all part of my loathing of the politicization of everything. Is the poem good, yes or no? By good I mean aesthetically and intellectually. I do not mean good because it advances a social justice agenda or because it allows an excluded voice to be heard.
Is the poem good? That's it. That's what I care about in a work.
Here, I'll present a somewhat heretical view. I think Crichton was an incredibly accomplished author. I also think that State of Fear fails as a novel because he gave more attention to the polemics than to plot, characterization and pacing. State of Fear is just as social justice warriory as anything from the Left and that poisons the work in exactly the same manner. I don't care that it's on "my" side. It still detracts from the work.
That being said, the text of a speech he gave on the topic that is included in State of Fear is quite delightful. Why? Because that's supposed to be a polemic and it succeeds masterfully. Different formats. Different goals. Same author. Wildly different results.
I'm so sick of every person being shoved into tiny categories and then judged by how well they do or do not fit into those categories when they do, well, anything at all. Individuals are individuals and should be judged as such.
Now, if you'll excuse me, that dino porn isn't going to read itself.
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (mf5HN)
Posted by: Victoria Chang at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (8ZskC)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
Posted by: FenelonSpoke
But you published his po-em
When you didn't even know him
Posted by: Furious George at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (UlJ3l)
----------------
And what's the other one? 3 names. Joyce something. ..
I once went on a date with a young, hot teacher the made Carrie Underwood look lame.
When authors came up, and I heard her prattle on about how great she is, I basically waited a little while, paid the tab & never called her back.
Posted by: Chi at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (XeiJX)
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (oDCMR)
http://www.cnn.com/2015/04/07/living/
feat-mindy-kaling-brother-affirmative-action/index.html
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (NOIQH)
physical difference. Female athletes just can't perform at the same
level as male athletes (comparing the top athletes for both genders),
which is why the women marathoners always come in after the male winner,
etc. For chess, I got nothing.
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (NOIQH)
Of course. My point was to the comment that saying something is "good for an X" was demeaning. Isn't that exactly what we're saying in the womens' championship of ... well ... everything?
If you're the champion, you're the champion. If you're the champion given some restriction on who can compete, then you're "good for an X," where X is that restriction.
Isn't that true?
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (gy5kE)
You mean like, "Oh, hey, you can get absolute drek published if you're the right 'minority' class?"
Those kinds of questions? Because I think it's past time those questions were asked.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (kff5f)
Posted by: Required Seinfeld Reference at September 08, 2015 03:52 PM (Jktp1)
Posted by: Sporkatus at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (HtLSE)
Especially in sci-fi.
Romance? Not so much.
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (qCMvj)
I find this kind of thing interesting, how one's estimation of a work of
art can change so much when one finds out that one's understanding of
who wrote it is suddenly challenged.
I do as well. I long argued regarding Milli Vanilli that everyone loved their music until it was discovered that the two black dudes didn't really sing it. And then the music disappeared off the airwaves and the grammy was taken back. Why? The music everyone loved was still the same. The music hadn't changed one iota.
Same thing with Vanilla Ice after he lost his "street cred". Suddenly, nobody would admit to liking Ice Ice Baby. But it was the same song whether Ice was a bad-boy BMX champion or just a typical suburban white kid.
One homo-erotic cheesy video ruined Billy Squier's career - and I loved that album of his.
I can understand in some circumstances. It DOES make a difference if the guy writing the alleged autobiography really suffered through the things claimed or not - because how the story reaches you emotionally is different when you believe you are reading fiction versus non-fiction.
but for music? Or paintings? Or poetry? What difference does it make who the artist is if you like the art?
Posted by: Monkeytoe at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (3ZtZW)
Posted by: Bandersnatch at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (JtwS4)
Posted by: tu3031 at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (YFFpo)
NEWS FLASH TO VICTORIA CHANG and everyone else like her in academia:
YOU ARE NOW THE PRIVILEGED CLASS.
That's right, you.
Minorities get special treatment and special privilege and get hired and get promotions and get awards and all the rest SOLELY BECAUSE THEY ARE MINORITIES.
YEs, there used to be a anti-minority bias is various aspects of society. But in most areas, not only has htta bias disappeared, IT HAS BEEN REVERSED.
There is now overt, blatant, unapologetic anti-White bias and pro-minority bias in almost every field of academic endeavor (and a lot of other fields as well).
What happened to this guy's poem PROVES this.
As a white man, he is a failure. But fool people into thinking he's a minority, and suddenly he's a genius.
Happens all the time, day in, day out, in every academic and literary scene.
The Left is exploding because this incident has revealed their racism and bias for the world to see.
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (jBuUi)
Eastern European babes wouldn't be allowed to wear their hot mini-skirts
if they played in the men's league, which is the only real interest in
women's tennis.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair
But (butt) when it comes to beach volleyball, the womens kick ass.
Posted by: Bruce at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (8ikIW)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (ZHZBE)
Wrong. Bees Can't 'lie'. Didn't he watch Jupiter Ascending?
(man that poem was terrible)
Posted by: Lea at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (lIU4e)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Buzzion at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (z/Ubi)
It's Rachel-Yi Feng-Sui now, gwei-lo.
Posted by: Rachel-Yi Feng-Sui at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Iblis at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (9221z)
Posted by: The Book of Asian Limericks at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (nFdGS)
Oh, and thanks, white leftists and colored people agitators, for ensuring that many people's first impression of me will be that I'm probably somewhat dumb and got where I am because of extra melanin.
Even if I outperformed the vast majority of people on various tests regardless of race.
Thanks a lot.
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (SEFXb)
Posted by: steevy at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (sPO3u)
Posted by: sock_rat_eez at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (go6ud)
Otherwise Evil Ex-Girlfriend had lovely boobies and would strip when we played chess. I never won a game.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (JtwS4)
Happens all the time, day in, day out, in every academic and literary scene.
The Left is exploding because this incident has revealed their racism and bias for the world to see.
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 03:53 PM (jBuUi)
And that is the true poetry, here.
Posted by: rebel flounder at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (Vf5rR)
Posted by: ed gibbon at September 08, 2015 03:44 PM (5DdVJ)
Stop stealin' my sh*t, man
Posted by: Willie B Yeats at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (8CdUx)
thank you. I thought I was being ignored because I'm white - worse, English Ed G
Posted by: ed gibbon at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (ALcbf)
Dude, I know who you are!
You're actually John Rocker!
pretty funny, though.
Posted by: OneEyedJack at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (kKHcp)
categories in non-physical competitions, too, like chess, pool, ... and
women still can't beat the men.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:51 PM (zc3Db)
I wasn't deprecating women's sports per se, I was deprecating the comment that adding a qualification to praise ("good ... for an X") is demeaning.
I just chose X = women because that was an obvious choice, but X could be any number of segmentation variables.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (oKE6c)
The left is obsessed with race and ethnicity. They view an "ethnic" sounding name as superior and confer upon on it superior intelligence and morality.
Fucking crazy, I know, but that is the Left for ya!
Posted by: Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (COpZ4)
Posted by: X
----------------------
I recall a story about a painter, who, in attendance at a cocktail party, was asked what he was doing lately. "Nothing", he replied. When it was explained to him that it was not possible in a fully-employed economy to be doing nothing the poor fellow fled to Italy.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (9mTYi)
--------------------
You mean Asians, right?
Orientals are rugs. Or so I've been told for years.
Posted by: Chi at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (XeiJX)
Posted by: Hank at September 08, 2015 03:46 PM (kHkDb)
And her Presidential Inaugural benediction "poem" stood as one of the worst public speeches in history ... until Rev. Joseph Lowery gave his infantile rant ... "when yellow will be mellow ... when white will embrace what is right ..."
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (zc3Db)
I disagree about Millie Vanili specifically because I view that as very different. It wasn't that people suddenly didn't like the music, it was that those two specific dudes (and their con-man producer IIRC) were being specifically punished/black-listed.
Otherwise, I agree. If your "appreciation" for "art" changes based on your perception of the artist, then I suspect you never appreciated the art in the first place.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (kff5f)
Otherwise Evil Ex-Girlfriend had lovely boobies and would strip when we played chess. I never won a game.
--------------------
So you never forked her?
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (oDCMR)
Posted by: Elizabeth Warren-Chang at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (ZHZBE)
Honorable brother have head up his ass.
Posted by: Fuk Yu at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Victoria Chang at September 08, 2015 03:58 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Jerry Seinfeld at September 08, 2015 03:58 PM (ZHZBE)
Posted by: emhatic Asian commenter at September 08, 2015 03:58 PM (8CdUx)
That's all well and good, but the cheap sanctimony posing as the knight in shining armor for the oppressed downtrodden members of some group is just to good to give up on that easily. The appearance of principles, after all, looks exactly the same as having principles but without having to deal with difficult decisions and hard choices.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 03:58 PM (hLRSq)
Posted by: dan-O at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (ByqK7)
Donna Chang?
Posted by: Required Seinfeld Reference
____________________________________
She's not Chinese, she's from Long Island!
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (eEBON)
The left is obsessed with race and ethnicity. They view an "ethnic" sounding name as superior and confer upon on it superior intelligence and morality.
Fucking crazy, I know, but that is the Left for ya!
Posted by: Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (COpZ4)
Would you people please read the comments
23 But you're not Chinese!
Posted by: estelle costanza at September 08, 2015 03:38 PM (5DdVJ)
Posted by: ed gibbon at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (ALcbf)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Maya Angelou at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (OiFtZ)
from that crooked kitchen utensil that looks like a small bowl with a long handle, the one I can never
remember the name of. Do you know
the old cook's joke: that, theoretically, wine can't go with salad?
But they look soup perfect together, like Absolute Vodka incarnate: one still plus one blue filter equals about a billion
years of double vision-ness. Which leads me to wonder what it is
I'm doing here, peering through a door at the thigh-pockets stuffed with Bidis and the baffling intricacies
of cumin and chicken. Am I supposed to say something, add a soundtrack and voiceover?
Posted by: Mahatma Coat at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (qSIlh)
There are advocates for every group except whites. Advocates for whites are called racists.
Hell, someone is debating calling me a racist for even saying that.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (88fBD)
eek!
but how was the cadence in Mandarin? Cantonese? Burmese?
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (qCMvj)
Posted by: dan-O at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (ByqK7)
Posted by: Charlie Chan at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (OiFtZ)
------
Veronica Chang, if that is your real name, that is one of the most brilliant insights I have ever laid eye on. If it is not your name, it is submoronic waste and is unworthy of my time.
Posted by: Dave S. at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (mhkbv)
Jonah Goldberg wrote a mocking column about this - how they never can attribute it to any person or tribe, and if they were so wise then how come....yeah, it's just patronizing PC crap.
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (NOIQH)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
But you published his po-em
When you didn't even know him
And now we all think you're cray-cray.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (OSs/l)
The anesthesiologist
Gives you a simple task
He asks that when he passes gas
You breathe it through a mask
Posted by: Doctor Cynic at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (Zls+j)
However, music is about image, and you better have one if you want to succeed. Even people that eschew an image have one.
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (CGjum)
Posted by: Walknot at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (FnHBZ)
Posted by: emphatic Asian commenter at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (8CdUx)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (qCMvj)
Orientals are rugs. Or so I've been told for years.
Posted by: Chi at September 08, 2015 03:56 PM (XeiJX)
No. I meant Orientals, which is the correct label. Asians comprise a much larger class. The two labels are not synonymous in any way. There are many Asians who aren't Orientals. The left just wanted to get rid or "Orientals" for some stupid reason and chose an incorrect replacement. In Britain, when someone says "Asian" they mean Pakistani or Indian, which Americans almost never use "Asian" for.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 04:01 PM (zc3Db)
nation where it will not be judged by the color of their skin or the ethnicity of the name of the author but by the content of it's verses.
I have a dream today!
Posted by: Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at September 08, 2015 04:01 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: Charlie Chan at September 08, 2015 04:00 PM (OiFtZ)
Only fool #1 son. Not Charlie.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:01 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 04:01 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: sock_rat_eez at September 08, 2015 04:01 PM (go6ud)
Everything.
The angry yellow bee is not to be taken lightly.
Posted by: se pa moron at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (sI4OA)
Posted by: Dwight K Schrute at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (ZHZBE)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair
Or, rather, that scholarship isn't the point of the humanities; it's tribal signaling and cargo cultism.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (JmGFJ)
Posted by: Colin at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (eoM8x)
And 20 minutes later you want another one.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Maya Angelou at September 08, 2015 03:59 PM (OiFtZ)
Yes, I've read your entire oeuvre and I loved it.
Posted by: No Sane Person Ever at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (8ZskC)
----------------------------
Name three great women authors.
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (oDCMR)
I can't reveal the exact name here, for obvious reasons, but it's along the lines of "Yolanda Washington" or "Latasha Jones."
(Don't ask me what her mother was thinking when my friend was born -- that's a different tale altogether.)
Anyway, my friend is in a creative/artistic field. Again, for her privacy, I won't reveal the exact field. Something literary or art-related.
They story of her lie, of her entire career, is being MISTAKENLY perceived as black in submissions, and then one of two things happens:
1. The editors/judges think she's black, then give her what she wants -- publication, prize money, and exhibition, etc. -- and there is no real pubicity around what happens, and my friend "gets away with it." Gets away with what? Well, she says, it's quite obvious in many instances that the judges/editors thought she was black, and awarded her with success based on that.
or
2. She AT FIRST is given success, based on the presumption that she is black, but then there is some kind of nosy querry or underhanded investigation as to her "identity," and when they discover she is white, THEY RETRACT THE AWARD/PRIZE/PUBLICATION etc.
This happens to her on a regular basis, year in, year out. And it gets worse every year.
She's not trying to defraud anyone -- she can't help what her name is -- but she ends up being in a situation like this poetry guy's ALL THE TIME.
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (jBuUi)
Hell, Russians are Asians, though they'll deny it vehemently.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (88fBD)
Posted by: Country Singer, Laid Back Asian Man at September 08, 2015 04:03 PM (nL0sw)
cream of sum yung gai?
Not appetizing to my
jaded western eye.
Shrimp ho li fuk?
I'd rather have the peking duck.
Who can say if the pu pu hot pot
Is really authentic or not?
Not I, says I, let's just go
to eat dim sum at hung far lo.
Posted by: imp at September 08, 2015 04:03 PM (XIXZz)
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 03:58 PM (hLRSq)
Wait, I thought we weren't yelling about Boehner et al in this thread.
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:03 PM (mf5HN)
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 03:55 PM (SEFXb)
Chique, by patronizing you the Progressives are now able to feel morally superior to both you and the knuckle-draggers.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 04:03 PM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Killerdog at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (dyNnE)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (oDCMR)
----
Shelly
Wolf
Cather
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: Northernlurker at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (4rzL1)
Posted by: BunkerintheBurbs
----------------------------------------
You go, Ewok!
Posted by: Alicia Keyes at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (E5UB0)
I write that as someone who loves poetry, who has had a few of his more worthwhile poems published in literary journals, who believes the arts--prose, poetry, music, painting, sculpture--immeasurably enrich the lives of those who experience them. Reading dreck like this breaks my heart. Knowing the arts are nearly fully politicized now breaks it even more.
Posted by: troyriser at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (XHR9b)
Posted by: buzzsaw90 at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (/eTPT)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (88fBD)
Most Russians are Asian, but I believe that the original La Rus were Vikings. But, as you point out, as much as Russia wants to consider itself part of Europe ... it ain't.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Alicia Keyes at September 08, 2015 04:04 PM (E5UB0)
------
In this thread ...... E-Wok
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: I Am Groot at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:05 PM (CGjum)
I can't reveal the exact name here, for obvious reasons, but it's along the lines of "Yolanda Washington" or "Latasha Jones."
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 04:02 PM (jBuUi)
Is her name "Airwrecka McBride?"
http://tinyurl.com/ncvam4b
Posted by: Country Singer, Laid Back Asian Man at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (nL0sw)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (ZHZBE)
While race - which has largely been mixed and mingled ever since wandering prehistoric man figured out how to distill Everclear for the local girls wherever he happened to be - is clear and immutable for all progressive purposes.
Posted by: The Devoceleraptor at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (o+SC1)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
....So he went to Nantuckett.....
Posted by: Norman at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (CYS6Q)
"Phil Yu, the blogger better known as Angry Asian Man, wrote "if there is such a thing as employing yellowface in poetry, this has to be it."
Honorable brother have head up his ass."
Phil Yu, some hotshot.
Posted by: Lady in Calgon commercial at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (OD2ni)
--------
Well..... that reads ALOT like a bunch of Jose Conseco haikus...
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: buzzsaw90 at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (/eTPT)
If everything is racist (sexist, ageist, etc) then nothing is.
Posted by: steve walsh at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (UPLmD)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (OSs/l)
Yaaaaay.
http://news.yahoo.com/frankenvirus-emerges-siberias-frozen-wasteland-142859117.html
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (mf5HN)
Vikings. But, as you point out, as much as Russia wants to consider
itself part of Europe ... it ain't.>>>
Which has given them a inferiority complex that has led to a whole lot of killing over the past several centuries.
Posted by: Buzzsaw at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (tf9Ne)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (CGjum)
from an article about repairing laptops:
We live and work in a cold, cruel world where our laptops take a lot of abuse. Regardless of how gentle we try to be, it's inevitable that sooner or later our notebooks will get dropped, spilled on and worse.
poetry:
We live and work in a cold,
cruel world where
our laptops take a lot of abuse. Regardless
of how gentle we try to
be, it's inevitable that sooner or later our
notebooks will get dropped,
spilled on
and worse.
now read it with heavy breathing and lots of feeling. Bingo.
Posted by: Mahatma Coat at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (qSIlh)
Posted by: USA at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (tfM+W)
On the other hand, this AA crap will degrade the quality of works from politically correct groups. And the lefties will still keep raging in a bewildered fashion why the white guys keep finishing first. Same as the Muzzies wonder why they don't control the world right now, given that Allah is on their side.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:09 PM (E5UB0)
This isn't a new thing. Perhaps the racial component, but the Literary Arts have been political for ages.
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (ZHZBE)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (CGjum)
Scientists said they will reanimate a 30,000-year-old giant virus unearthed in the frozen wastelands of Siberia
O_o
Have these people never read a book or seen a movie? Ever?
There is only one way this ends.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (kff5f)
Posted by: Buzzsaw at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (tf9Ne)
Not nearly enough, IMHO.
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, VT at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (lNSdJ)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (qCMvj)
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (jBuUi)
It's a dude using double standards within the industry to advance his own work
He's wrong for doing it.
The industry is a bunch of lying liars who lie about double standards not existing.
A perfect collision.
Just like the Rachel Dolezal (Now with more fetus) clown show.
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (VPLuQ)
Um.......?
We know not to do this with dinos. So, why????
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Ho Lo Bang at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: Mahatma Coat at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (qSIlh)
Posted by: imp at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (XIXZz)
Have these people never read a book or seen a movie? Ever?
There is only one way this ends.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (kff5f)
No, no, no, they aren't going to reanimate it until they prove it's totes safe first.
Totes.
I mean, there's noooooo way that can go wrong.
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (mf5HN)
Posted by: Chupacabras
---------------------
Tell us about it!
Posted by: Deny Diaz & Skunk Baxter at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (XeiJX)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say
They discovered his ruse
While he was trying on shoes
And saw his dick got in the way
Posted by: Insomniac at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (2Ojst)
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 04:10 PM (ZHZBE)
I'm old. I read very old books.
Posted by: troyriser at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (XHR9b)
Erica Jong
esp that line about her being so aroused that she 'could mop up the streets of Vienna with my underpants'. Context, man; it's all about context
Posted by: emphatic Asian commenter at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (8CdUx)
How is it not? Don't we use the Urals as a dividing line? Moscow has all the neoclassical architecture of any city on the Danube. And their aristocracy were all the same Krautish louts as the rest of Europe's.
St. Petersburg is on the Baltic, (oh I cheated and looked this up, I thought St. Petersburg was a Hanseatic city, but Novgorod was).
Posted by: Bandersnatch at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (JtwS4)
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (VPLuQ)
Posted by: Alex at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (lDNRa)
As good as you rook ?
Posted by: The Asianry Brothers at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (3FBAK)
Posted by: Ward Churchill at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (oKE6c)
Yaaaaay.
http://news.yahoo.com/frankenvirus-emerges-siberias-frozen-wasteland-142859117.html
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:08 PM (mf5HN)
Hmmmm. I'm going to have to find me a guy with a crossbow. A guy with a bo staff. And a chick with a samurai sword.
Posted by: Buzzion at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (z/Ubi)
Posted by: USA at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (tfM+W)
Posted by: Soona at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (Fmupd)
Tangentially, I so want my own dragon, "Lucky".
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: emphatic Asian commenter at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (8CdUx)
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:03 PM (mf5HN)
The lack of a spine and the absence of any moral compass does render it hard to distinguish between the Progressive and the garden variety politician.
To do so you have to look for the expression of smugness and sanctimoniousness on the Progressive's face while the politician tends towards unctuousness and sincerity.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 04:14 PM (hLRSq)
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
....So he went to Nantucket.
But barfed in a bucket....
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:14 PM (OSs/l)
>>, an "Oriental" is a blow job lasting less than three minute
They are an efficient people.
Posted by: Garrett at September 08, 2015 04:07 PM (ZHZBE)
That's a slanted perspective.
Posted by: rebel flounder at September 08, 2015 04:14 PM (Vf5rR)
Posted by: B. Hussein Obama at September 08, 2015 04:14 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Capt. Sum Ting Wong at September 08, 2015 04:15 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: White Z at September 08, 2015 04:15 PM (3FBAK)
(Something to keep in mind as you peruse the comments, carefully reading some and skipping over others.)
Posted by: FireHorse at September 08, 2015 04:15 PM (/LXLs)
Remember the island of Lesbos?
it's got problems.
http://www.weaselzippers.us/?p=233774
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at September 08, 2015 04:12 PM (VPLuQ)
Sounds like a sticky situation.
Posted by: rebel flounder at September 08, 2015 04:15 PM (Vf5rR)
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:15 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Bo N. Herr at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (Ui7Rt)
Posted by: Al Sharpton at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (53CCM)
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (mf5HN)
Also, the US Government didn't store, and then lose, live anthrax (or whatever that was).
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (kff5f)
like watching paint dry...
OMG, was just warning my son that he'll have to read some books for school that he won't like, with my example being "Death Comes to the Archbishop."
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Capt. Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk and Bang Ding Ow at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (e8kgV)
He doesn't imply it, he proves it.
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (evdj2)
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 03:48 PM (oKE6c)
I'm in Northern Clownifornia and I just tell anyone who asks about my lawn, "old man Brown can kiss my green ass"
Posted by: the Butcher at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (fUjxW)
Posted by: Bruce at September 08, 2015 03:35 PM (8ikIW)
Limericks actually rhyme, and are therefore unacceptable.
Posted by: Secundus at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (8Neph)
Our first half black President cannot be criticized when he fucks up badly because to do so would be racist.
The soft bigotry as lowered expectations.
Posted by: Cheri at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (oiNtH)
it's got problems.
About to tip over? Get those 300 lb. Lesbians evenly distributed, for God's sake!
Posted by: Hank Johnson at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (oKE6c)
Yaaaaay.
...
Posted by: alexthechick -
"Scientists said they will reanimate a 30,000-year-old giant virus unearthed in the frozen wastelands of Siberia,"
Oh, there's no way that could possibly go wrong.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (JtwS4)
Posted by: The Craw at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (OD2ni)
a poem because it is
broken into couplets, despite
there being no metrical reason,
is another academic pretension
that leaves the reader with no
other conclusion but that
poetry is dead.
if the author had simply written it out as it sounds, you'd get a paragraph of descriptive prose.
clang clang clang clang clang
clang clang clang clang clang
clang clang clang
clang clang clang
clang clang clang clang
clang.
Posted by: musical jolly chimp at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (WTSFk)
I could name other fine women writers, but I think the point of the original post was that there are no great women writers which I disagree with. Besides, people often don't agree on who's a good writer. I loathe Hemingway, yet (In keeping with the them of the poetry selection) some people think he's the bees knees. :^)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (OSs/l)
(I might really be Asian, but I'm certainly no journalist )
Posted by: Connie Chung at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (XeiJX)
FIFY
In reality, they think we are all inferior savages.
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (SEFXb)
We've sat around waiting for the courts to strike it down but they never do.
Imagine hundreds of thousands of kids being denied entrance because they found out what skin color they are.
Posted by: Coolio at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (bDiF7)
Speak for yourself, I am of Cherokee blood!
Posted by: Elizabeth Warren at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (eoM8x)
It really is, Muscovy is. The Czar was not asian, it was a typical european monarchy. Communism is German, again, european. The dominant ethnic group, the Rus, are white european. In what way is Russia asian?
Posted by: Not Mitt Romney at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (TULs6)
Posted by: goon at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (gy5kE)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Mahatma Coat at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (qSIlh)
There once was a man from Tai-Pei.
Who wasn't Asian at all, so you say.....
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 03:45 PM (OSs/l)
-------
So We spun him around.
Around and around
And he's still "disoriented" to this day.
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 03:47 PM (8XRCm)
...............................
Ah, the old Chinese basket trick.
Posted by: Confucius say: at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (wAQA5)
------
For some reason I've started that book about five times and never made it past the first 5 pages.
Great cure for Insomnia.
Posted by: SH at September 08, 2015 04:18 PM (gmeXX)
How does one chamber a round in the vagina?
http://www.wfaa.com/story/news/crime/2015/09/08/woman-with-pistol-in-vagina -charged-with-unlawful-carry/71888032/?utm_source=twitterfeed &utm_medium=twitter
Posted by: imp at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (XIXZz)
Now, I haven't read the whole post, much less the original article (I'm totes an O.G. Moron). But after reading the poem excerpt, I can't help thinking the dude was actively trolling the publishing company.
As a side note, I've always had this fantasy of making a low-budget movie chock-stuffed with EVERY leftist Hollywood cliche I could think of, doing press where I earnestly embraced the lefty philosophy, at least, up until the Oscars. Where I would give a sneering Best Picture acceptance speech, chortling about how a political conservative pulled the wool over the eyes of a bunch of drug-addled jackasses in Hollywood and made a film that was INTENTIONALLY bad, but PC.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (1QsMy)
I love how *they* are about to do just that, and then turn around and blame GLOBAL WARMING!!!!
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (kff5f)
That is to say, contemporary poetry sucks ballz.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (VAsIq)
Now, if you'll excuse me, that dino porn isn't going to read itself.
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up
We tried polling it your way but decided we needed new voters.
Posted by: Political Consultants at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (c3y9H)
Posted by: President Azzhole Obama at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (e8kgV)
The Leftists are mad simply because he exposed their charade.
And from that line, a poem could be
Made. In America, it matters
Not. Whether you succeed or sneeze but
The color of your snot.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (ODxAs)
Totes.
I mean, there's noooooo way that can go wrong.
Seen that movie too.
Posted by: rickb223 at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (W4LFA)
school that he won't like, with my example being "Death Comes to the
Archbishop."
The Archbishop caught a break.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:20 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: se pa moron at September 08, 2015 04:20 PM (sI4OA)
A Russian History professor once told the class that Russia was best thought of as like Wile E. Coyote while Europe was the Road Runner.
Russia always lagged behind Europe due to its conquest by the Mongols and its sheer size. Russia would attempt to catch up at great exertion, but by the time it did, Europe would have moved ahead, chirping "Beep beep!" as it did so.
An example would be that Russia adopted serfdom in order to make itself more like Europe, but fully implemented it right before the French Revolution happened. It would only ditch serfdom in the late 19th century.
Even in the 20th century, Stalinism made Russia the apex of an early 20th century nation...in the 1970s, when steel factories were less important than computer tech.
Russia has always wanted to be in Europe, but sadly it's always been behind a bit.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 04:20 PM (88fBD)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:20 PM (OSs/l)
There's absolutely no question that the publishing business is filled with abject retards these days, but the Chinese market is quite big, so perhaps they're thinking "hey, Chinese name, maybe more sales there!"
Posted by: Christopher Taylor at September 08, 2015 04:21 PM (39g3+)
Posted by: The German Stones at September 08, 2015 04:21 PM (3FBAK)
Posted by: Penfold at September 08, 2015 04:21 PM (Fbt5B)
---
My sense is there are no great women authors. There are several good women authors. No female Tolstoy, Conrad, Faulkner, Melville, Dostoevsky.. The women are decidedly a level beneath great. My opinion.
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:21 PM (oDCMR)
I wonder what mutation is responsible for that look. Did it occur in several people at once or just one person?
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (E5UB0)
Posted by: musical jolly chimp at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (WTSFk)
Posted by: Shodu (she's a female Ewok--look it up, haters) at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (CGjum)
Because all men rape, and oppress.
And God is shiny, and light is rape, and oppress.
Kill Whitey, kill whitey, kill.
Where is my grant money, bitches? I want the Pope. I want a seat on the G8. And a pool, with robots.
Posted by: neal at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (2z4UX)
No, no, no, they aren't going to reanimate it until they prove it's totes safe first.
Totes.
I mean, there's noooooo way that can go wrong.
Seen that movie too.
Posted by: rickb223 at September 08, 2015 04:19 PM (W4LFA)
................................
I'll do it, sir.
Posted by: Black Scientist Dude at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (wAQA5)
in b4 I See London, I See France, I Go Pee Pee In My Pants!
Posted by: Soothsayer, now with a low profile tip and ergonomical handle at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (WdCTZ)
Posted by: that guy who hates haiku at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (ZtFr+)
Posted by: musical jolly chimp at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (WTSFk)
-----------------------------------
That's beautiful, man. Fucking beautiful. *weeps*
Posted by: Soona at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (Fmupd)
Posted by: Rick Shaw at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (oKE6c)
He doesn't imply it, he proves it.
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:16 PM (evdj2)
But think about how good he felt when he did that! He helped a poor, oppressed downtrodden poet get published (see how noble and generous I am!) and he showed those knuckle-draggers how much more enlightened and superior he was (see how I helped break the Asian-Poet ceiling!)
The Pharisee-like self-righteousness simply oozes out of the pores of Sherman Alexie.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Autumnal Enormities have Arrived at the Outrage Outlet! at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (CGjum)
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:23 PM (evdj2)
People should not be judged on their names.
Posted by: Bo N. Her
Thank you for recognizing my plight.
Posted by: Bony Knee Chapman at September 08, 2015 04:23 PM (OiFtZ)
But you know what? They can have their dying industry and keep the ashes of what was once their total dominance of publishing. I'll take 70% profits and total control over my own work, thank you.
Posted by: Christopher Taylor at September 08, 2015 04:23 PM (39g3+)
Posted by: AndrewsDad at September 08, 2015 04:23 PM (C2//T)
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:23 PM (evdj2)
Posted by: Rick Shaw at September 08, 2015 04:22 PM (oKE6c)
---------------
ISWYDT
Posted by: Penfold at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (Fbt5B)
I think with some books it really depends on your age. That Cather book was just a bore for 16 year old me. I finally got around to reading "Wuthering Heights" in my 40's and man, did I hate that book. Apparently this book makes teen girls swoon? Gah!
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: imp at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (XIXZz)
Jane Austen's writing is brilliant.
Posted by: Lea at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (lIU4e)
Posted by: musical jolly chimp at September 08, 2015 04:17 PM (WTSFk)
The lyrics for Yoko Ono's next, long threatened, album?
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Qoheleth at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (iIzG7)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:13 PM (NOIQH)
http://bit.ly/1VM4bLL
Posted by: alexthechick - Yeah I give up at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (mf5HN)
Posted by: socalcon at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (vHlQ5)
Posted by: rickb223 at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (W4LFA)
Not sure he'd get much play in today's market.
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (CGjum)
I never speak with Asian men because they only want to bone me, and I'm not into being boned but into the loving taco.
Posted by: Margaret Cho at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (OiFtZ)
Post-Mongol Russia considered Europe to be evil and wanted no part of it, owing to the fourth crusade's sake of Constantinople. They considered themselves inheritors of Byzantium and the Third Rome, and believed if the Third Rome fell it meant the end of the world. Mongolian rule had made Russia different from say France or England in ways they weren't different from each other.
It was only under Peter the Great that great effort was taken - with mixed success - to bring Russia into Europe.
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (88fBD)
Here's my contribution:
My friend tells me that Italian
men are specifically hot. And I say you must be kidding because everyone
knows that Scandinavian men - Danish, Norwegian
, Swedish - that's where it's
at. She agrees and adds that Finnish men are hot
,too, you know. But
I correct her and say that they aren't technically
Scandinavian. And anyway, how
many Finns has she met? She says, huh, then we
both agree that Frenchmen are
smelly and go on our way.
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (SEFXb)
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (evdj2)
Thus, my political satire and my bored housewife crap are published under different names and my young adult fantasy under yet another. My professional writing is published under whatever random pseudonym that the company chooses.
I decided to put my real name on the political satire because I decided that putting my real name on it is taking a stand.
Anyway sorry to be all me me me me me me me there, but I find the whole question of what an author calls himself to be rather interesting.
Posted by: Lauren at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (TgyJ/)
I think we should all communicate with each other using lyrics from Stairway To Heaven. It makes me wonder. It makes me wonder.
Posted by: Soothsayer, now with a low profile tip and ergonomical handle at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (WdCTZ)
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:24 PM (oKE6c)
I thought that was AAAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEAAAAA!
Posted by: Secundus at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (bv/yq)
Certainly there is racism and fraud at work here, but not on Hudson's part.
>>>Phil Yu, the blogger better known as Angry Asian Man, wrote "if there is such a thing as employing yellowface in poetry, this has to be it."
Phil Yu? Phuk Yu.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (E5UB0)
Posted by: socalcon
-----
One poem had a line about apes and grapes or something.
Posted by: Political Consultants at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (c3y9H)
It really is, Muscovy is. The Czar was not asian, it was a typical european monarchy. Communism is German, again, european. The dominant ethnic group, the Rus, are white european. In what way is Russia asian?
------------------------------
They are of European phenotype but they have a distinct 'Asian' way of thinking. They straddle both continents and have been conquered by anyone coming by from the east so it should not be a surprise.
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (oDCMR)
Hungarian camerawoman for N1TV caught kicking and tripping refugees as they fled from police [photos, video] http://bit.ly/1hUjK52
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (9mTYi)
To-day we have naming of parts. Yesterday,
We had daily cleaning. And to-morrow morning,
We shall have what to do after firing. But to-day,
To-day we have naming of parts. Japonica
Glistens like coral in all of the neighboring gardens,
And to-day we have naming of parts.
This is the lower sling swivel. And this
Is the upper sling swivel, whose use you will see,
When you are given your slings. And this is the piling swivel,
Which in your case you have not got. The branches
Hold in the gardens their silent, eloquent gestures,
Which in our case we have not got.
This is the safety-catch, which is always released
With an easy flick of the thumb. And please do not let me
See anyone using his finger. You can do it quite easy
If you have any strength in your thumb. The blossoms
Are fragile and motionless, never letting anyone see
Any of them using their finger.
And this you can see is the bolt. The purpose of this
Is to open the breech, as you see. We can slide it
Rapidly backwards and forwards: we call this
Easing the spring. And rapidly backwards and forwards
The early bees are assaulting and fumbling the flowers:
They call it easing the Spring.
They call it easing the Spring: it is perfectly easy
If you have any strength in your thumb: like the bolt,
And the breech, and the cocking-piece, and the point of balance,
Which in our case we have not got; and the almond-blossom
Silent in all of the gardens and the bees going backwards and forwards,
For to-day we have naming of parts.
Posted by: Zombie Henry Reed at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (fMQoG)
Posted by: OldDominionMom at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (GzDYP)
Posted by: Lauren at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (TgyJ/)
I shouted out, "who killed the Kennedys?" When after all, it was you and me.
Posted by: Soothsayer, now with a low profile tip and ergonomical handle at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (WdCTZ)
Not sure he'd get much play in today's market.
Posted by: Chupacabras
Yeah, the Left hates a man who hits a woman.
Posted by: Bill Clinton at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (VAsIq)
Otherwise Evil Ex-Girlfriend had lovely boobies and would strip when we played chess. I never won a game.
--------------------
So you never forked her?
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg at September 08, 2015 03:57 PM (oDCMR)
No, but I bet he "castled long"...
Posted by: Tex Lovera at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (wtvvX)
Viking rape put a lot of Europe in Russia centuries before Peter.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at September 08, 2015 04:27 PM (JtwS4)
Posted by: Nelson to SJWs at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (dEwvU)
Posted by: Lizzy at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (NOIQH)
Everything I print is in my name. I don't really care if anyone knows and I've heard its really tough to build a reliable brand and fan base if you use pseudonyms. However, in the internet age? Maybe not such an issue any longer, considering how easy it is to dig up info on people.
Posted by: Christopher Taylor at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (39g3+)
If you compare it to the most successful Euro empires. What if you just compare it to states? There are lots of poor places in Europe. Is Russia so backwards compared to Greece? Portugal? Ireland?
And besides the european governments (czarism and communism) and the ruling european ethnic population of slavs, they also have a european religion, orthodox christianity. And a european alphabet - Cyrillic.
Posted by: Not Mitt Romney at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (TULs6)
Jane Austen's writing is brilliant.
Bliss and Bacteriophage, the recently-discovered final novel of Jane Austen!
Posted by: Penguin Classics presents at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (ZtFr+)
Posted by: Lauren at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (Pul1H)
What really diminishes your accomplishments is that you need a rigged contest to accomplish anything.
Posted by: CJ at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (9KqcB)
There's a bustle in your hedgerow.
Like you didn't know.
Posted by: Secundus at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (bv/yq)
Posted by: azjaeger at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (ubkaX)
Posted by: socalcon
____________________________________________
I think they are judged on a slope.
Posted by: Countrysquire, feeling reasonably fresh down there at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (eEBON)
Posted by: Howard Dean's lawyers at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (tf9Ne)
I mean, seriously, who gives a shit?
Here's something else to publish, here at the beginning of the school year:
If you are a High School English Teacher, teaching "literature?" Yeah, you're a parasite. You suck our blood and give us essentially nothing in return. Every time a kid asks "when will I need this in real life?" and you smile indulgently? Yeah, you're wrong and they are write. Emily Dickinson, Hemingway, Bronte, eecummings and the rest of them are a COLOSSAL waste of time.
I read Hemingway - he wasn't as good as Stephen King, even though Hemingway was cool and King is a dick. I read Poe. Meh. I read Emily Dickinson and somehow survived with my scrotum intact. Charles Dickens was OK, sometimes.
And here's the thing: like most "readers," I've been reading voraciously since I was around 8 years old. You couldn't, and can't, keep me away from books. I'm so "well read," it's disgusting. I read history. I read economics. I read political theory. I read science.
I read Shit That Matters.
And once in a blue moon, I'll read poetry. Usually Frost, but not always.
And this is how I know: you truly did waste a huge amount of my time, and a huge amount of our tax dollars. I should have been learning more Science, or Computer Programming, or sports, or languages, or damned near anything else.
Instead of writing Essays, I should have been taught How To Communicate For Business. Today that would include How To Make You Tube Videos.
For a graduate of 2016 to read James Joyce or - worse! - write an essay on "why it matters" is as pure a waste of time as I can think of.
Posted by: RobM1981 at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (zurJC)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (E5UB0)
There's still time to change the road you're on.
Posted by: Soothsayer, now with a low profile tip and ergonomical handle at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (WdCTZ)
------------------------------------------
SSSHHHHH! Maet might be lurking.
Posted by: Soona at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (Fmupd)
What time does the china-man go to the dentist ?
Answer: 2:30
Think about it.... it will come to you...
Posted by: RonUSA at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (EaqMa)
if you meant Virginia Woolf, I read three of her novels some years ago and would sooner read Zeppo Marx's autobiography again than read another volume of her plodding prose.
Posted by: Mahatma Coat at September 08, 2015 04:11 PM (qSIlh)
The best thing that Virginia Woolf ever did was her involvement in the Dreadnought Hoax.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreadnought_hoax
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2015 04:29 PM (1QsMy)
Posted by: Totally Chinese Guy at September 08, 2015 04:30 PM (t5sHJ)
Posted by: Ai Weiwei at September 08, 2015 04:30 PM (ahBY0)
(unearthed by Breitbart) that claimed he was born in Kenya. Heh."
When that subject came up, Obama's publishers panicked and immediately claimed that it wasn't Obama's fault, it was totally on them, and it was their normal practice at that time to have anonymous low level interns write the authorial bios in-house for inclusion in the publishers' catalogue.
So it was obviously the fault of the unnamed intern from years past, who could not be reached for comment, that Obama's bio made the "born in Kenya" claim. Based on what again exactly? The publisher refused to say.
Someone actually had the bright idea to contact another one of the authors whose book and bio had appeared in the same edition of the catalogue as Obama's book and bio.
He said, to the no doubt immense chagrin of the publishers, that he had never heard of any such system of bios being written for authors by third parties. The publishers had asked him to write his own bio blurb and send it in to them, he had complied, and they then had printed it in the catalogue exactly as he had provided it. Word for word.
So, yeah, it's pretty obvious that Obama himself has at times used the "born in Kenya" bit when he found it advantageous to do so, and discarded it just as easily when it was disadvantageous. For instance, when having to claim to be qualified to stand for the Presidency.
Posted by: torquewrench at September 08, 2015 04:30 PM (noWW6)
My lily-white ass
Is second class
In my own country.
If I were person of color
I could just holler
And it would all be rumbly rumbly.
- Malik Kwanza Sh-Boom
Posted by: The Great ____ Snark at September 08, 2015 04:30 PM (XUKZU)
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:31 PM (evdj2)
Otherwise Evil Ex-Girlfriend had lovely boobies and would strip when we played chess. I never won a game.
--------------------
So you never forked her?
Posted by: Jonah Goldberg
What a rook!
Posted by: rickb223 at September 08, 2015 04:31 PM (W4LFA)
Posted by: Phinn at September 08, 2015 04:31 PM (DLUnW)
Posted by: Hillary! at September 08, 2015 04:31 PM (ZWRoJ)
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:26 PM (oDCMR)
RUSSIAN, noun. A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul.
--Ambrose Bierce
Posted by: Secundus at September 08, 2015 04:31 PM (bv/yq)
Posted by: Penguin Classics presents at September 08, 2015 04:28 PM (ZtFr+)
Ha! I feel like I need to write a book about Elizabeth Bennett fighting off an old reanimated virus now.
Posted by: Lea at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (lIU4e)
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (SEFXb)
Posted by: The New Christie Minstrels at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (c3y9H)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (E5UB0)
Necromance if we want to
Necromance all the time
But your friends aren't dead
And if they aren't dead
Then they're no friends of mine
Posted by: Qoheleth at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (iIzG7)
I think everyone's missing the real opportunity here. There's a lot of liberal money out there that wants to be taken.
You don't even need a quality product, just a persona.
Posted by: heartofdarkness at September 08, 2015 04:32 PM (MQ0Jr)
Posted by: Buzzion at September 08, 2015 03:54 PM (z/Ubi)
---
Beat me to it. I thought you were deceased.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at September 08, 2015 04:33 PM (E5UB0)
Pigeons on the grass alas.
Pigeons on the grass alas.
Short longer grass short longer longer shorter yellow grass. Pigeons
large pigeons on the shorter longer yellow grass alas pigeons on the
grass.
Posted by: Gertrude Stein, widely admired for something, something at September 08, 2015 04:33 PM (9mTYi)
Where now are the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing?
Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing?
Where is the harp on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing?
Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing?
They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow;
The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow.
Who shall gather the smoke of the deadwood burning,
Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning?
Posted by: Grump928(c) at September 08, 2015 04:33 PM (evdj2)
Hemingway was cool and King is a dick. I read Poe. Meh. I read Emily
Dickinson and somehow survived with my scrotum intact. Charles Dickens
was OK, sometimes.
Some of the classics are nigh unto unreadable. One I remember started with two hundred pages of Russian genealogy. Pretty engaging stuff. Kinda like reading the phone book.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:33 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Buzzsaw at September 08, 2015 04:34 PM (tf9Ne)
Yeah, I'm sure it probably has serious downfalls. I just figured that any fan base I developed would be wildly divergent between the groups. I mean, wouldn't you be sort of shocked to find William Gibson* writing bodice rippers?**
Actually, that might be awesome.
*Not comparing myself to William Gibson
**Also, do not write bodice rippers
Posted by: Lauren at September 08, 2015 04:34 PM (Pul1H)
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:34 PM (SEFXb)
Continents are meaningless as it relates to peoples or countries. Continents are geology. North Africa and sub-Saharan Africa are the same continent but North Africa is more European (these days middle eastern) than African. And much of the middle east and western central Asia as well as north Africa used to be a part of Europe until Islam over-ran it.
As for their distinct way of asian thinking - czarism historically, communism in the 20th century and orthodox christianity forms their thinking. Certainly not Confucianism.
Posted by: Not Mitt Romney at September 08, 2015 04:34 PM (TULs6)
To A Crippled Girl
It's not your peg-leg,
It's not your hook.
What turns me on
Is that spastic look.
Posted by: Soona at September 08, 2015 04:35 PM (Fmupd)
Posted by: sifty at September 08, 2015 04:35 PM (cT+cB)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:35 PM (OSs/l)
See, here's my question: by what metric is Agatha Christie "not literary work?"
Few types of fiction are harder to write than mystery. A mystery novel hits all of those "literary" thing you learn in HS (and even college) lit classes - characterization, foreshadowing, etc. And Agatha Christie was incredibly popular.
So is that the metric? Your work's literary value is inversely proportional to how popular it is?
I will actually suggest that, yes, that is exactly the metric - with very, very rare exceptions.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) - Fire-hooks and Rock Salt for sale at September 08, 2015 04:35 PM (kff5f)
Posted by: Not Mitt Romney at September 08, 2015 04:35 PM (TULs6)
----------------------------
Name three great women authors.
_______________________________________
3 great works by female authors with male pseudonyms:
Nelle Harper Lee/Harper Lee: To Kill A Mockingbird.
Charlotte Bronte/Currer Bell: Jane Eyre
Louisa Mary Alcott/A.M Barnard: Little Women
There are several more albeit their "greatness" is subjective.
Posted by: Walknot at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (FnHBZ)
Tikki Tikki tembo no sarembo chari bari ruchi pip perry pembo has fallen into the well.
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (8XRCm)
Posted by: Ponsonby Britt at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (tNSR3)
And all the children are insane
All the children are insane
Waiting for the summer rain
There's danger on the edge of town
Ride the king's highway
Weird scenes inside the goldmine
Ride the highway West baby
------------------
This is an example of what I expect from Asian poets.
Posted by: Puddin Head at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (oDCMR)
publishers, that he had never heard of any such system of bios being
written for authors by third parties. The publishers had asked him to
write his own bio blurb and send it in to them, he had complied, and
they then had printed it in the catalogue exactly as he had provided it.
Word for word.
Posted by: torquewrench at September 08, 2015 04:30 PM (noWW6)
Of course. That's standard procedure. Who knows someone's bio better than the person? Besides which, there might be aspects that the author would prefer glossed over or maybe left out entirely.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:37 PM (oKE6c)
Worm...
slip, slide,
subterranean slime
you are not worth.
the earth
that envelopes you.
Worm.
Oh, the happy days of yutes.
Posted by: eureka! at September 08, 2015 04:37 PM (g1MTt)
Nelle Harper Lee/Harper Lee: To Kill A Mockingbird.
Charlotte Bronte/Currer Bell: Jane Eyre
Louisa Mary Alcott/A.M Barnard: Little Women
There are several more albeit their "greatness" is subjective.
Posted by: Walknot at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (FnHBZ)/i]
Who was it who wrote "Meter Maids in Bondage?"
That was a great book.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 08, 2015 04:38 PM (oKE6c)
Posted by: Connie Chung at September 08, 2015 04:38 PM (XeiJX)
Posted by: Semiliterate Thug at September 08, 2015 04:38 PM (WAjuC)
Life and Death have been in love since the beginning.
Life brings death millions of presents.
And Death keeps them forever.
Posted by: fixerupper at September 08, 2015 04:39 PM (8XRCm)
Not sure he'd get much play in today's market.
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (CGjum)
You've perhaps never heard of this new thing called Hip Hop, or Rap?
Your pal Bukowski could perhaps do well there, but that name of his....
Posted by: OneEyedJack at September 08, 2015 04:39 PM (kKHcp)
Posted by: bof at September 08, 2015 04:39 PM (Bu4wL)
HALF a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
'Forward, the Light Brigade!
Charge for the guns! ' he said:
Into the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
'Forward, the Light Brigade! '
Was there a man dismay'd?
Not tho' the soldier knew
Some one had blunder'd:
Their's not to make reply,
Their's not to reason why,
Their's but to do and die:
Into the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
Posted by: Bill Clinton at September 08, 2015 04:40 PM (VAsIq)
190 176 It's ironic that white men need to use pen names to get published. Remember when women had to use male pen names? Some of their efforts have been considered some the best ever written; An inconvenient truth I suppose.
----------------------------
Name three great women authors.
_______________________________________
3 great works by female authors with male pseudonyms:
Nelle Harper Lee/Harper Lee: To Kill A Mockingbird.
Charlotte Bronte/Currer Bell: Jane Eyre
Louisa Mary Alcott/A.M Barnard: Little Women
There are several more albeit their "greatness" is subjective.
Posted by: Walknot at September 08, 2015 04:36 PM (FnHBZ)
You, monseiur, are le suck.
Posted by: Zombie George Sand at September 08, 2015 04:41 PM (1QsMy)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at September 08, 2015 04:41 PM (VAsIq)
The funniest/worst (i.e. most revealing) thing that has yet happened to her is that she was contacted by a radio station (in another city) to be interviewed live on-air about one of her successful projects.
She didn't research the station ahead of time and didn't really think much about the upcoming -over-the-phone interview.
Then the appointed day and time arrived, and about five minutes before the hour (as is standard for on-air radio phone interviews) the producer called to establish the connection and set the sound levels before putting the interview subject on hold for the moment the actual interview begins.
Well, the producer woman seemed a little taken aback by my friend's white accent, and after a minute of semi-probing racially-tinged questions, said "Hold on a moment," then put my friend on hold, and then came back 15 seconds later and abruptly announced that the interview was canceled, and hung up. This was one minute before it was scheduled to begin.
My friend once again had to sigh and conceded to herself that, a. She was chosen for the interview in the first place because they thought she was black, and b. Had it canceled because they found out she was white.
In fact, she's suffering from what I now dub "Faux Affirmative Action Inadequacy Syndrome," in which she has self-doubts and low self-esteem because she can never be completely sure whether any of her literary/artistic accomplishments have been on their own merits, or instead handed to her as mistaken attempts at Affirmative Action.
Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2015 04:42 PM (jBuUi)
It punctuated ranting where they rant and then randomly emphasize a word here and there.
This is what modern "poetry is like":
http://preview.tinyurl.com/q8fsr63
Posted by: The Poetic Hatr at September 08, 2015 04:42 PM (AM+tj)
I am a proud Philistine and I have no use for flowery language for the sake of being flowery.
Yes, I studied engineering. Why do you ask?
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:44 PM (SEFXb)
I know which way the current's flowin
I see which way the wind's a blowin
Opportunity's up and flown
Fields of blood to be sown
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale at September 08, 2015 04:46 PM (uhftQ)
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:46 PM (SEFXb)
The bee went "buzz" - the flower, it was blue;
I watched and watched and watched 'til ten of three
Then thought about some stuff 'til 4:02.
"I'll write a poem but I don't know how;
I'm not a poet. Alas, it is a curse;
Haiku by Basho: Those words strike you: POW!
But as for me, I just cannot write verse."
Good gracious, man! Just try to rhyme some words!
I don't expect a sonnet or the like,
A little bit of rewrite afterwards,
You might just make a real poem, Spike.
Poetic virtue, you don't own a trace;
But you'll get published if you yellowface.
Posted by: FireHorse at September 08, 2015 04:48 PM (3Ey9q)
Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at September 08, 2015 04:50 PM (SEFXb)
As lovely as my pee-pee.
Posted by: Anthony Weiner at September 08, 2015 04:51 PM (VAsIq)
Who couldn't (or wouldn't) stop wanking.
"Just can't put it down"
He said with a frown,
"I probably need a good spanking."
Posted by: real asian poet, totally at September 08, 2015 04:51 PM (wKcQA)
The poster above thinks there were no "great" ones. Once again, it depends on how one defines "great".
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:53 PM (OSs/l)
Of course, if this is one of the best poems of the year, then poetry has definitely fallen on hard times.
Posted by: Brown Line at September 08, 2015 04:56 PM (zcbZo)
Posted by: FireHorse at September 08, 2015 05:00 PM (3Ey9q)
Not sure he'd get much play in today's market.
Posted by: Chupacabras at September 08, 2015 04:25 PM (CGjum)
If he just changed it to Bukake he'd have no problem.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at September 08, 2015 05:00 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 04:53 PM (OSs/l)
Hitler was a great author.
Posted by: Louis Farrakhan at September 08, 2015 05:01 PM (zc3Db)
who wrote poems on toilet papier
they smelled quite a bit
also sounded like shit
and all began "Confucius say.."
Posted by: Hong Kong Fuey at September 08, 2015 05:06 PM (ats44)
Posted by: FireHorse at September 08, 2015 05:10 PM (3Ey9q)
Posted by: Fritz at September 08, 2015 05:13 PM (3tjn4)
*recalls the Skoal Affair*
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at September 08, 2015 03:49 PM (9mTYi)
Sokal
Posted by: m at September 08, 2015 05:15 PM (ELEPX)
You'll be published because you're obviously Native American, FireHorse. ;^)
And I liked it too.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at September 08, 2015 05:18 PM (OSs/l)
To note, those segregations do *not* exist for sexual orientation or race because those do not impact gameplay -- or, at least, not to the significant degree that sex does.
Applying those same segregations or prejudices is implicitly saying that women (or PoC) are mentally inferior to white men. That may be the argument you (or the biased judges) are intending to make, but then it should be explicit. Part of the insult is that it's a veiled insult.
Posted by: sunny-dee at September 08, 2015 05:28 PM (EBoCD)
So, yes - it's crap no matter who wrote it, and anyone selecting it for anything but the circular file has no business judging poetry, period.
Posted by: Adjoran at September 08, 2015 05:38 PM (QIQ6j)
Posted by: gates at September 08, 2015 05:50 PM (2u8LP)
Posted by: Hung Low at September 08, 2015 06:20 PM (OC/e1)
"Frankly, I see far better Chinese poetry in Chinese restaurant menu item
naming. "
Fortune cookie poem:
Help me,
I'm am held captive,
in a cookie factory.
Posted by: Leung Dong Waang at September 08, 2015 06:23 PM (hHs1b)
Incidentally, this is the same mentality that ruined the Hugo Awards for Science Fiction and Fantasy. Substance had nothing to do with recognition...only the proper ideology or ethnicity was supported. Same deal here. The SJW's rule the roost of the unimportant....but they rule with an iron glove.
Posted by: OrsonSnow at September 08, 2015 06:44 PM (OgO9f)
a) geographical names
b) pronouns
c) famous poet names
d) all of the above
e) racist
Posted by: Desicat at September 08, 2015 06:48 PM (xXiRt)
Some white chick with a Chinese name or somesuch.
Posted by: Jack O'Spades at September 08, 2015 06:53 PM (xQZ/Y)
Thy micturations are to me,
As plurdled gabbleblotchits,
On a lurgid bee,
That mordiously hath blurted out,
Its earted jurtles,
Into a rancid festering confectious organ squealer. [drowned out by moaning and screaming]
Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustles,
Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts,
And living glupules frart and slipulate,
Like jowling meated liverslime,
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turling dromes,
And hooptiously drangle me,
With crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
See if I don't.
Posted by: Chris Balsz at September 08, 2015 06:54 PM (EioIi)
Identify the following: "Ze, Hir, Hirs, Xe, Xem or Xyr".
a) geographical names
b) pronouns
c) famous poet names
d) all of the above
e) racist
f) homophobic
Posted by: Desicat at September 08, 2015 06:58 PM (xXiRt)
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-bee-10/
Posted by: Stringer Davis at September 08, 2015 07:04 PM (xq1UY)
Haikus are easiest
Drunkenly stum'bling
Engineers say you can't fly
Thigh pouches swollen
Posted by: docweasel at September 08, 2015 07:42 PM (XxzcU)
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Watchdog barking. Do he bite?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Slip in his window. Break his neck.
Then his house I start to wreck.
Got no reason. What the heck?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
C-I-L my land lord!
Posted by: Wong Hung Lo at September 08, 2015 07:50 PM (YoBuY)
Posted by: WannabeAnglican at September 08, 2015 08:21 PM (96Dar)
Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at September 08, 2015 09:56 PM (u5gzz)
That is just dumb. Shouldn't there be a feeling that happens when you read it? I guess that is only white people's poems. The ones that can't get into books called "the" best.
Posted by: petunia at September 08, 2015 10:38 PM (VoCyE)
"RUSSIAN, noun. A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul."
One of the Elizabethans (I think it was) put it in two words: "baptized bears".
Posted by: Dr Weevil at September 08, 2015 11:03 PM (B81dz)
Posted by: keena at September 09, 2015 12:49 AM (KTbb0)
Posted by: Case, Mors Semper Tyrannis at September 09, 2015 01:20 AM (Bbcs8)
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Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
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AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
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George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up
Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
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Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
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The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
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Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
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Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
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Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
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Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
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Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
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A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)