If Hillary Clinton's Speaking Fee of $237,000 Is Too Much For You, You Can Hire Her Useless Failure-Puddle of a Daughter for $65,000

What the Clintons lack in dignity, they make up for in graft.

I know I'm way late on this but can I just say: Oh my shit.

Wow.

Racism is a powerful animating force. And yes, this is racism. This is Female Superiority Racism mixed with Liberal Comfortable Class Tribalism Racism.

This is all about paying someone to stand as an avatar for one's own Superiority.

You can make a lot of money by giving the unaccomplished a racial or chromosomal excuse to feel that they're Important, too.

When the University of Missouri at Kansas City was looking for a celebrity speaker to headline its gala luncheon marking the opening of a women's hall of fame, one of the names that came to mind was Hillary Rodham Clinton.

But when the former secretary of state’s representatives quoted a fee of $275,000, officials at the public university balked. "Yikes!" one e-mailed another.

So the school booked the next best option: her daughter, Chelsea.

The university paid $65,000 for Chelsea Clinton’s brief appearance...

Now, let's see what a University gets for it's $65,000. Or what I call "full ride for a deserving underprivileged student."

The schedule she negotiated called for her to speak for 10 minutes, participate in a 20-minute, moderated question-and-answer session and spend a half-hour posing for pictures with VIPs offstage.

That long, huh? I hope she's monitoring her pulse rate. That kind of pace can kill someone.

As with Hillary Clinton’s paid speeches at universities, Chelsea Clinton made no personal income from the appearance, her spokesman said, and directed her fee to the Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton Foundation.

Yes... and let's pretend that Foundation doesn't pay for their wardrobe, offices, transportation, travel, and five man staffs. (Yes, Chelsea has a five man staff.)

You know what most people call those things?

The cost of living. (Plus, jet plane rides and five-man staffs!)

So yes, they are in fact being paid by the Foundation.

If I started a "charity" and contracted to pay all your food and rent costs for the rest of your life, would you claim that you were being 'uncompensated"?


So the university turned back to others, eventually choosing Chelsea Clinton when the agency indicated she was willing. Just shy of her 34th birthday, Clinton commanded a higher fee than other prominent women speakers who were considered, including feminist icon Gloria Steinem ($30,000) and journalists Cokie Roberts ($40,000), Tina Brown ($50,000) and Lesley Stahl ($50,000), the records show.

Chelsea's done so much more, just by being born to Hillary Clinton and... well it really doesn't matter.


Officials with the school appeared to believe Clinton was worth her fee, which university spokesman John Martellaro said was paid using private donations. They exulted to Clinton’s representatives that the luncheon sold out quickly, with 1,100 tickets selling for $35 each -- which would equal $38,500. University officials say the event was intended to boost attention for the new hall of fame, not raise money.

So you funneled money to the Clintons at a fundraiser, lost money (as usual), and then you say "It wasn't about the money anyway, it was a about the attention?"

What f***ing attention? Who the hell ever heard of this before now?

I'm reading an article about this "hall" you supposedly boosted the profile of and I can't name the hall or guess what this hall's function is.

This was about funneling other people's money to political figures the left likes -- as usual.

"Chelsea was the perfect fit," Amy Loughman, an alumni relations official who managed the event, wrote in an e-mail a few days later. "It created fantastic buzz in the community."

She created fantastic buzz on NBC News, too, before she was fired for having the charisma of a urinal cake.

...

In dozens of e-mails exchanged between University of Missouri officials and Clinton’s representatives at the Harry Walker Agency, which arranges appearances by all three Clintons, there was no reference to her $65,000 fee going to charity. Nor was there any reference in the five-page contract.

Because it didn't.

What can this charmless, talentless, pointless woman do except collect graft-checks on behalf of her parents?

The university paid the fee -- which also covered Clinton’s travel expenses -- in two disbursements to the Walker Agency. But Martellaro said, "We have no knowledge of how funds were disbursed from that point."

Bazbaz said all of Clinton’s paid speeches through the Walker Agency are delivered on behalf of the foundation "to support implementing its life saving work" and that this was "always the intention" with the University of Missouri. He added that neither she nor her hosts receive charitable tax deductions.

Because it's not charity.

Oh now let's look at the contract, which has more riders in it than Van Halen did at the peak of their popularity.

The contract stipulated that Clinton would have final approval of everything, such as the selection of her introducer (celebrities, journalists and elected officials were prohibited from consideration), the onstage setup (there must be "room-temperature water" next to her podium along with "two comfortable armed-and-backed chairs" for the question-and-answer session) and the type of microphone provided for her use (both lavaliere and handheld).

In e-mails with university officials, Clinton’s aides closely edited the texts of press releases, marketing materials and introductory remarks. Clinton’s representatives instructed that a line about her being the daughter of Bill and Hillary Clinton be deleted from one news release and that her title of vice chair of the Clinton Foundation be added beneath her name on an electronic flier. Other materials mentioned her parents, however.

When reviewing the script that a student would read introducing her, a Clinton Foundation aide asked university officials to remove the list of Clinton’s degrees. A Clinton adviser, who requested anonymity to speak candidly about the event, said "this was by no means an intention to script a high school student's introduction of Chelsea," but rather to avoid what otherwise would have been a recitation of all of Clinton's achievements.

There's so many of them, who could list them all?

She exists.

Oh, there you go. I just did list them all.

Not as hard as I thought.


...


Clinton’s representatives also closely managed her time on campus. They asked whether she would be free to depart from the event once she finished her remarks, rather than waiting until the luncheon concluded. Martellaro said she stayed until the end.

Clinton agreed to pose for photographs backstage with 100 VIPs prior to the speech. But her representatives requested that only 20 to 30 minutes be budgeted for the photo line, rather than 45 minutes the university initially sought.

You know what there's no news about?

Anything Chelsea Clinton said there that day.

For $65,000 for thirty minutes' work, you'd think that this graceless walking graft-bag could have said something interesting or insightful, no?

But no, no one expects anything from the Clintons; no accomplishments, no successes.

Just nothing but an extended hand, palm up, demanding their next pay-off.


Contest: Play this video -- Chelsea Clinton talking with Stella McCartney about how harrrrd it is to have rich parents -- and watch the counter.

Tell me the time at which you Tap Out.

How far can you make it?

Posted by: Ace at 07:53 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Well framed, Sport.

Posted by: Zombie John Holmes at June 30, 2015 07:56 PM (p0KI9)

2 But she wears a pants suit as well as Mao.

Posted by: simplemind at June 30, 2015 07:57 PM (gTvCM)

3 like a tomb in here. a tomb filled with Hillarys secrets and lies. State gonna release 3,000 of her previously undisclosed emails tonight. Feels like Friday

can't

breathe

too dark

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 07:57 PM (zOTsN)

4 poo fixed already

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 07:57 PM (zOTsN)

5 65k for 30 minutes....i thought it was for 10 minutes

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 07:57 PM (0O7c5)

6 DeadPornstarSockOFF

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 07:58 PM (p0KI9)

7 5 she has to mingle for 20 minutes after.

Posted by: NCKate at June 30, 2015 07:58 PM (bP6xm)

8 it was ten minutes of speech and 20 minutes of structured (vetted) Q&A

Posted by: ace at June 30, 2015 07:59 PM (bhepQ)

9 The site MarketWatch had this story and the idiots defending useless Chelsea getting $65k a speech is unreal. Because of all she's achieved that's why people pay her to speak being number 1 among the idiot reasons. The left would defend anything no matter how stupid it is.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at June 30, 2015 07:59 PM (DiZBp)

10 As with Hillary Clinton's paid speeches at universities, Chelsea Clinton
made no personal income from the appearance, her spokesman said, and
directed her fee to the Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton Foundation.


Where it will be sheltered from taxes but still go to fund her lavish lifestyle. For the children.

Posted by: French Spa Salesman at June 30, 2015 08:00 PM (oVJmc)

11 What the hell could The Gaping Maw of Clinton Spawn talk about for ten minutes anyways? How to remove that golf ball from the garden hose in one easy step?

Posted by: Bosk at June 30, 2015 08:01 PM (n2K+4)

12 A fool and their money are soon parted.

Posted by: just saying at June 30, 2015 08:01 PM (wkuqO)

13 she is a monument to nepotism and the neo royalty

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:01 PM (zOTsN)

14
Chelsea is grateful to have the opportunity to speak at events like this while also supporting the work of the Clinton Foundation, said the spokesman, Kamyl Bazbaz.




I'm pretty sure I had a Kamyl Bazbaz Star Wars action figure when I was a kid....

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:02 PM (kdS6q)

15 It's Howdy Doody Time!

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:02 PM (oVJmc)

16

what she achieved is escaping Hillarys cooch

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:02 PM (zOTsN)

17 How can they possibly drag these grifters over the finish line?

Posted by: dude guy at June 30, 2015 08:02 PM (q177U)

18 Every minute.

Posted by: PT Barnum at June 30, 2015 08:03 PM (yYOXd)

19 Zeppo Clinton.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:03 PM (oVJmc)

20 15 It's Howdy Doody Time!
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:02 PM (oVJmc)



Hey, Hillary was easy.

Posted by: Alfred E Neuman at June 30, 2015 08:03 PM (wkuqO)

21 No celebrities or reporters could introduce her because having them do so would demonstrate what a fraud she is. I'm reminded of mike Birbiglia's bit about a hell gig he did for a celebrity charity golf outing for cancer. First he was the "celebrity" of his foursome so he kept apologizing. Then at the banquet they had a real celebrity speak, I forget who. Then they had a kid with cancer come up and speak. THEN it was time for him to do his standup routine.

Having Chelsea speak after a celebrity introduce her is an insult to all.

Posted by: Buzzion at June 30, 2015 08:04 PM (z/Ubi)

22 Serious you guys, you KNOW she is at least going to be governor of new York one day.

Posted by: simplemind at June 30, 2015 08:04 PM (aYHsS)

23 When your talk is called "The Wit and Wisdom of Chelsea Clinton," you're pretty limited in how much you can ask as the fee with a straight face.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (8ZskC)

24 "(Yes, Chelsea has a five man staff.)"

Well, I would have taken the over.

Posted by: Funkotron at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (c7rW1)

25 see the update-- contest!

Posted by: ace at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (bhepQ)

26 Was there not another stupid ugly Biatch available?

Posted by: Boss Moss at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (n3Sbm)

27 I would go to year Chelsea speak just for the fun of telling the moderator I wanted to ask a question (and I would have some bogus, sychophantic question about how awesomely awesome it is to grow up in America's Greatest Political Family of All Fucking Time!!!11!1!), and then I would uncork this question:

"Chelsea, tell us. Janet Reno is really your Dad, isn't she?"

That would be worth getting arrested for.

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (72D6h)

28
I am trying to figure out what little clinton or the big clintons would have to pay for if food, clothes, travel, office space, hired help, tech, servers!, hookers, blow, accommodations are all paid for by the foundation.

All tax free, but these bastards think the rich! and middle class can pay just a little bit more for the good of the country.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at June 30, 2015 08:06 PM (ODxAs)

29 I wish people would pay me 6500 a minute to hear me run my cum dumpster at them

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:06 PM (unjBv)

30 I'm curious. Is it okay to pay the money but just not allow her to speak?

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at June 30, 2015 08:06 PM (8ZskC)

31 I wonder how much Socks and Buddy Clinton would get paid for purring and barking if they were still alive. They would have been more entertaining than Billary and her spawn.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (bQYVO)

32 I don't care about money.

PAY ME!

Posted by: Goodfella Chelsea Clinton at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (5itIK)

33 In my fantasy, we round up the wild-eyed idiots who are willing to pay whatever to Chelsea or her horrid mother or father, and send them to:

Happy Fun Camp Jane D'oh.

However, in my camp there's no "happy" or "fun".

Lots of manual labor, however. And Cuisine by Michelle Obama.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (FsuaD)

34
Yes... and let's pretend that Foundation doesn't pay for their wardrobe, offices, transportation, travel, and five man staffs. (Yes, Chelsea has a five man staff.)

You know what most people call those things?

The cost of living. (Plus, jet plane rides and five-man staffs!)

So yes, they are in fact being paid by the Foundation.









I'm sure that all of you small business-owning Unpeople from Jesusland have NO problems with the IRS when you forget to account for the mileage on a couple of personal errands run in the company truck.

No problems whatsoever.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (+OXwX)

35 Didn't tap...cause I couldn't watch it.


Clinton filter on my eyeballs prevents that.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (VPLuQ)

36 "Chelsea, tell us. Janet Reno is really your Dad, isn't she?"

That would be worth getting arrested for.

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (72D6h)

"What *did* Bill's Special Cigar taste like?"

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (unjBv)

37
Chelsea,
Good news and bad news:
The good news is that there's a special place here for you dear, the bad news is there is no "honoraria".

Posted by: All My Love, SATAN at June 30, 2015 08:07 PM (HKyCl)

38 Just for the record, urinal cakes are quite charismatic in comparison to Chelsea Clinton. Also better kissers, from what I've been told.

Posted by: Mister John Galt at June 30, 2015 08:08 PM (7krDt)

39 Webb must be sooo proud

Posted by: Frank G at June 30, 2015 08:08 PM (OhxaG)

40 >>> She created fantastic buzz on NBC News, too, before she was fired for having the charisma of a urinal cake.

In Nazi Germany or Soviet Russia, typing such a thing was a firing offense. I hope we don't come to that.

Posted by: fluffy at June 30, 2015 08:08 PM (2iV3X)

41 omg. what the hell did they cut out, if they left this crap in?

Posted by: ace at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (bhepQ)

42 I am viciously, bitterly jealous that I didn't come up with failure puddle.

Also at least Stella McCarthy has done something all on her own.

Posted by: alexthechick - Come to us SMOD at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (IrByp)

43 At this point, the Clintons are just phoning it in.

Dialing for Dollars...so to speak.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (VPLuQ)

44 Posted by: fluffy at June 30, 2015 08:08 PM (2iV3X)

I didn't know the Nazis outlawed insulting statements toward urinal cakes

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (unjBv)

45 Charisma of a Urinal Cake.

That's pure fucking poetry,Ace.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (p0KI9)

46 I kind of admire the Clintons. Most of these fake charitable gigs are uber rich parents setting their kids up while skirting tax laws.

The Clintons have managed to convince rich people to give them money and while there are all those cases of bribes ala the Uranium deals they also get big money out of some folks and groups just to show up and probably get lots of little donations out of idiots who are just buying into "being part of something"

Posted by: PaleRider at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (dkExz)

47 Truly amazing. Like living in a TV show.

Posted by: f'd at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (BO/km)

48 2:57

Who edited that shit? Why let that vapid nonsense go on and on?

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:09 PM (oVJmc)

49 Which would be easier to locate?

A: Hillary's lost emails

B: One person saved by the Clinton Fountation's life saving work

Posted by: Tmitsss at June 30, 2015 08:10 PM (Pa9vP)

50 If Chelsea's "speeches" are anything like the clips I've seen of her on the Today Show, she's the typical millenial:

"And I'm interviewing Miley Cyrus?" Always with the question mark uptick.

I'd gut my own self before watching that stupid, self-important little bitch.

Can't wait to see how the Obama hell-spawn turn out.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:10 PM (FsuaD)

51
"Chelsea, tell us. Janet Reno is really your Dad, isn't she?"

That would be worth getting arrested for.

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:05 PM (72D6h)








*snort*

The man who would have the intestinal fortitude to do that and avoid spoiling it by laughing would be crowned King of the Morons.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at June 30, 2015 08:10 PM (+OXwX)

52 run my cum dumpster at them

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:06 PM (unjBv)


Errrr . . .

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:11 PM (72D6h)

53 Fifty Shades of Graft by Chelsea Clinton

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at June 30, 2015 08:11 PM (8ZskC)

54
Here's one of my achievements: Getting $65K for droning on bout nothing for 30 minutes.

Have you ever done that?

Posted by: CHELSEA! at June 30, 2015 08:11 PM (HKyCl)

55 As SOON as I saw Brian Williams I laughed out loud. I kept laughing until bright red blood started foaming out of my nose at 3: 12 Just called 911. Thanks ace.

Posted by: simplemind at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (NreXU)

56 Errrr . . .

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:11 PM (72D6h)

Sorry. Old military joke. Mouth nicknames include things like "sperm bank night depository"

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (unjBv)

57 We've been known to eat urinal cakes when we get really hungry.

Posted by: Starving Haitian Kids at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (8ZskC)

58 And NO brown M and M's!



Or else!!!

Posted by: alphabaker at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (T2Zv1)

59 why WOULD anyone?

Posted by: Chelsea Clinton, RANdomly emphaSIZing ranDOM syllables like she's SEEing the SCRIPT for the first TI at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (bhepQ)

60 Tell me the time at which you Tap Out.

0:00

Pay me $65k and I'll consider watching it.

Maybe

Posted by: wiserbud at June 30, 2015 08:12 PM (LmP4O)

61 Talking to Stella McCartney, she comes off exactly like her mother without the angry bitch quality.

Which means she's pretty much without a personality.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:13 PM (oVJmc)

62 At least men will p!ss on a urinal cake. I doubt anyone would would bother to grace her in that manner.

Posted by: Mr. Mxyzptlk at June 30, 2015 08:13 PM (kHJ3a)

63
It may be fun in the future to see the battle between the clinton/obama slush fund graft machines. The bastard in chief has already set up his "foundation".

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at June 30, 2015 08:14 PM (ODxAs)

64 There is stupid, and there's weapons grade stupid.
Chelsea and the University are tied in a race.

Posted by: Gmac- 'all politics in this country now is dress-rehearsal for civil war' at June 30, 2015 08:14 PM (4CRfK)

65
Vidya of her speech:

https://youtu.be/QPoO4Tm1v8Y

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:14 PM (kdS6q)

66 This money wasn't rich parents money it was state money, tax money, the "peoples" money. Hey, that's what bureaucrats do; spend your money.
What a buzz.


Posted by: Ralph at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (/BXzQ)

67 Laugh if you want. But you wingnuts have no idea how much it costs to divert those pathetic Haitian natural resources to someone who can efficiently develop them.

Like for instance, my brother.

Posted by: Sir Hillary Edmund Rodham Clinton at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (8ZskC)

68 Fifty Shades of Graft by Chelsea Clinton

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at June 30, 2015 08:11 PM (8ZskC)

Gone with the Email

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (unjBv)

69 Chelsea Clinton makes more in a half hour than the US median annual income.

But they're *JUST*LIKE*YOU!*

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (oVJmc)

70
Speaking of the Inexplicable...

can someone tell me why Andrew Cuomo is gloating??

This is the guy who FAILED at running the state prison from which TWO hardened criminal MURDERERS escaped and were on the loose for 3 WEEKS.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (ye7KB)

71 Everybody calls them urinal mints, but they don't taste very minty.

Posted by: Joe Biden at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (tgnRB)

72 Chelsea has a "five man staff?" The hell?

Okay. One to flat iron the hell out of that wild, bushy hair.

Another to cake on enough makeup to make her appear "somewhat" normal.

Another to select her wardrobe, because gays...

The fourth to handle her everything else.

The fifth to keep her dad away from the young female staffers.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (FsuaD)

73 Chelsea Clinton makes more in a half hour than the US median annual income.

AND THAT'S TAX FREE!!!

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (oVJmc)

74
Clinton told the 1,100 people in attendance....



1,100? Must not be a lot going on in KC.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (kdS6q)

75 Didn't Darlin' Chelsea once interview Kermit the Frog? Or was that the GEICO gecko?

NBC sure got their money's worth when they hired that little moneymaker

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 08:15 PM (bQYVO)

76
Cuomo is out there all like yeah we got 'em!!

No asshole Cuomo you didn't get anyone. They got themselves. They ran out of steam and you and your bungling officers just happened to stumble upon them.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:17 PM (ye7KB)

77 The cost of living. (Plus, jet plane rides and five-man staffs!)
So yes, they are in fact being paid by the Foundation.
........................
Do they also pay for Chelsea's pharmaceuticals?

Posted by: wth at June 30, 2015 08:17 PM (wAQA5)

78 70


Speaking of the Inexplicable...



can someone tell me why Andrew Cuomo is gloating??



Because he's a Cuomo, and he believes his live-in, Sandra Lee, is an actual chef.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:17 PM (FsuaD)

79 Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:17 PM (ye7KB)

Anytime a politician says something like that, all I can think is, "Bitch, who's WE?"

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (unjBv)

80 I've left plenty of failure puddle children on many a women's dress.

Posted by: Billy Jefferson Clinton at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (21zCy)

81 49 Which would be easier to locate?

A: Hillary's lost emails

B: One person saved by the Clinton Fountation's life saving work
Posted by: Tmitsss at June 30, 2015 08:10 PM (Pa9vP)



The lost emails. At least they existed at some point.

Posted by: Mister John Galt at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (7krDt)

82
The theme of unequal opportunity is one she returned to several times in her remarks, declaring at one point that "intelligence is equally distributed, but opportunity is not."




She said, without the tiniest shred of self perception.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (kdS6q)

83 wardrobe, offices, transportation, travel, and five man staffs. (Yes, Chelsea has a five man staff.)

I once tried one of those silicone Five Man Staffs and practically ruptured my uterus. I hope Chelsea has done enough stretching exercises to handle the thing!

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (jBuUi)

84 Wasn't Kamyl Bazbaz a friend of Zyzybaluba on that one episode of Pee Wee's Playhouse where Jambi helped Pee Wee clean up the playhouse before the big surprise party for Cowboy Curtis?

Posted by: Minuteman at June 30, 2015 08:19 PM (HKyCl)

85 8 it was ten minutes of speech and 20 minutes of structured (vetted) Q&A
Posted by: ace at June 30, 2015 07:59 PM (bhepQ)
---
Think of what that would that money would get you with a skilled professional offering ten minutes of oral and 20 minutes of vetted T&A/P&A.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:19 PM (jR7Wy)

86 In retrospect, getting elected to higher office and starting a charity would have been a much easier way to get rich and be above the law.

Posted by: L. Ron Hubbard at June 30, 2015 08:19 PM (e/W+h)

87
It's only by the grace of God Almighty that those 2 didn't murder or hurt anyone in those 22 days...(that we know of).

Cuomo mustve been shitting his pants for 22 days straight.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:20 PM (ye7KB)

88 72
Chelsea has a "five man staff?" The hell?


Big staff she has.

Posted by: Ralph at June 30, 2015 08:20 PM (/BXzQ)

89

I watched the whole thing

you owe me

I suddenly undertand the whole white privilege beef a bit

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:20 PM (zOTsN)

90 Chelsea! has never done an honest day's work in her life. Just been patted on her unattractive head and told how special she is.

This, too, is the story of Obama.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:21 PM (FsuaD)

91 Wasn't Kamyl Bazbaz a friend of Zyzybaluba on that one episode of Pee
Wee's Playhouse where Jambi helped Pee Wee clean up the playhouse before
the big surprise party for Cowboy Curtis?


My kid is a Peewee addict. +1000 for the Zyzybaluba ref.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:21 PM (oVJmc)

92
The NBC gig was just another kick back. NBC expects important legislation when she is prez just like when she was sec of state.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at June 30, 2015 08:21 PM (ODxAs)

93 Because he's a Cuomo, and he believes his live-in, Sandra Lee, is an actual chef.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:17 PM (FsuaD)
---
Mandatory:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=we2iWTJqo98

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:21 PM (jR7Wy)

94 I want every university to know I'm a Clinton too.

I was just born in the wrong body.

Posted by: CWE at June 30, 2015 08:22 PM (7bv+d)

95

and my God is she boring

so boring

they only way anyone would pay to hear her is if there were some huge payoff in the end

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:22 PM (zOTsN)

96 Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:20 PM (ye7KB)

...Or they were smart enough to realize that killing someone would a) intensify the manhunt by turning the public even more against them and b) provide proof that they'd just been in one given location.

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:22 PM (unjBv)

97
sponsors also decided to underwrite a substantial portion of the costs of the launch event, in order to keep ticket costs low and make the event accessible to a broad swath of the greater Kansas City community. The resulting $30 ticket price also helped drive the quick sell out, according to event co-chair Curt Crespino, UMKC vice chancellor for university advancement.




1100 x 30 = 33000

OK, that's half her fee. Now if we take back some empty bottles to the store...

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:22 PM (kdS6q)

98 After watching the debate last night I got to surfing YouTube and came across a Hitchen's interview on CSPAN from 1999. It's amazing how much I forgot about the Clinton years and how completely horrible they were. For Hitchen's to hate someone on his own side with such a white hot passion tells you something.

Posted by: lowandslow at June 30, 2015 08:23 PM (dItuC)

99 I once tried one of those silicone Five Man Staffs and practically ruptured my uterus.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:18 PM (jBuUi)



You know the rule . . .

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:24 PM (72D6h)

100 I think I swam a couple of times at Stanford.

Posted by: Chelsea! at June 30, 2015 08:24 PM (JVgzo)

101 I clicked the vid, saw Brian Williams, and tapped out. Literally. I put the barrel on my temple.

Posted by: Corona at June 30, 2015 08:25 PM (jNCu+)

102 Staffers at the Today Show leaked the fact that they were instructed never to speak to Princess Chelsea directly. To go through a producer.

Jeeze louise. I hate these entitled twits so much. An ugly, nasty, daughter of two of the nation's biggest grifters is treated like a Special Snowflake because.

I'll be the baby grows up ugly, too. Inside and out.

And I refuse to denounce myself.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:25 PM (FsuaD)

103 Anybody else think Connie St. Louis also has the Friend of Sappho shield of protection?

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:25 PM (oVJmc)

104
Among those delighted by the event included Lisa Pelofsky, CEO of Pelofsky Associates. "She was unbelievably impressive," Pelofsky said after Clinton's speech. "She's mature beyond her years. I think the message that we can all make a difference and that you have a responsibility (stood out to me). She clearly chose a life of community service. It was very impressive."

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:25 PM (kdS6q)

105
They were dumb to stay in New York. As soon as they got out they shouldve put as much distance between the prison and themselves as fast as they could. Hijack a car and get outta NY.

Ditch the car and it's owner in a pond or a lake. Then take another car to another state and do the same thing. That's what I wouldve done.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:26 PM (ye7KB)

106
I tapped out after 0.

Or before 0. Is 0 a number even?

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:26 PM (MDgS8)

107 I wouldn't give Chelsea Clinton $10 for a Blowjob.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:26 PM (p0KI9)

108 Made it one minute in.

Stella McCartney looks like Ozzy Osbourne. Especially with that haircut.

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:26 PM (unjBv)

109 The huge payoff to put up with her drivel was hot cocoa and s'mores afterwards.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 08:26 PM (bQYVO)

110 Community service?

they are rich as fuck

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (zOTsN)

111
Within 24 hours I woulda been a thousand miles away from that prison.

Nobody would find me ever.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (ye7KB)

112 She clearly chose a life of community service.

SHE COST $130,000 AN HOUR. Some service.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (oVJmc)

113 That German Guy just crushed Alex Morgan!

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (p0KI9)

114 @70

Because that's what these prog bastards do now, they prance and preen and spike footballs even in the shadow of their abject failure.

And who is going to hold them to account?

The media?

The NY GOP?

The voters?

The man is a corrupt, fascist meathead and he will easily be re-elected by the gibbering baboons who make up his electorate.

Posted by: Kreplach at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (RfwXt)

115 Mandatory:



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=we2iWTJqo98



Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:21 PM (jR7Wy)


I hope I'm not alone in thinking that "Kwanzaa Kake" is the most condescending, racist crap ever.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (FsuaD)

116
65 k from some half ass bottom tier college?

Fuck me.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (MDgS8)

117 this proves that being rich does not mean you are smart

she is a boring lumpy young woman and nothing will change that

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (zOTsN)

118 Brown M&M's.

Because Van Halen used to ...


Crap. Nevermind.

Posted by: alphabaker at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (T2Zv1)

119 Clearly, I was remiss in not starting my own foundation. More fool me.

Posted by: rickl at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (sdi6R)

120 Five man staff is racyst, or sumtin.

Posted by: f'd at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (BO/km)

121 Those on a real tight budget can have the Clinton family dog for $5,000. It's dropped off by limo, takes a dump on the dais, humps your leg, and is picked up 30 minutes later. It's like having Bill, at 1/20th the cost.

There's a Clinton available for every budget category.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (MYSVz)

122 Ugh, what sort of lowlife would suffer the indignity of using their family name to amass power and undeservedly enrich themselves?

Posted by: Al Gore at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (e/W+h)

123 SHE COST $130,000 AN HOUR. Some service.


Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (oVJmc)

Depends on which community you're talking about. That one can afford it. Yours can't, and neither can mine, but there's just no helping some people, you know...

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (unjBv)

124 GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: logprof --USA! at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (JVgzo)

125 Hillary 2016!
Michelle 2024!
Chelsea 2032!
Sasha 2040!
Malia 2048!

Posted by: The FSA at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (jfUIE)

126 She's sacrificing, people!

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (8ZskC)

127 111


Within 24 hours I woulda been a thousand miles away from that prison.



Nobody would find me ever.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 08:27 PM (ye7KB)


I have no doubt most morons, and a handful of 'ettes, would have been in Mexico within a couple of weeks.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (FsuaD)

128 behold the new royalty

kiss the ring

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (zOTsN)

129 "Chelsea was the perfect fit," Amy Loughman, an alumni relations official who managed the event, wrote in an e-mail a few days later. "It created fantastic buzz in the community."

What is this alumni association? Can members sue for losses and the overt political bribes?

Posted by: Goodfella Chelsea Clinton at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (5itIK)

130
Did we score??

Holy crap.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (MDgS8)

131 Ugh, what sort of lowlife would suffer the indignity of using their family name to amass power and undeservedly enrich themselves?
Posted by: Al Gore

Word.

Posted by: Patrick Kennedy at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (tgnRB)

132
Among those delighted by the event included Lisa Pelofsky, CEO of Pelofsky Associates.


Looked up the company. Professional services for the charity racket. IOW, making bank on collected pennies.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (oVJmc)

133 Suckers born every minute.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (baR5c)

134 69th minute ...I didn't think it started til later.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:31 PM (MDgS8)

135 on twitter Ace has invented the millichelsea

its a unit measuring the lengths of time she can be endured

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:31 PM (zOTsN)

136 "I wouldn't give Chelsea Clinton $10 for a Blowjob."

I'd rather make hand babies.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 08:32 PM (VPLuQ)

137 Did we score??

Holy crap.
Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:30 PM (MDgS


--Yup, PK

Posted by: logprof --USA!!! at June 30, 2015 08:32 PM (JVgzo)

138 I wonder if that foam is also a Spermicide?

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:32 PM (p0KI9)

139 The charisma of an urinal cake?

Why do I feel that urinal cakes everywhere are offended by that comment?


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at June 30, 2015 08:33 PM (baR5c)

140 was this before her surgical facial enhancements

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:33 PM (zOTsN)

141 She's making a very good argument that such families should either provide a male scion for a military career every generation or be heavily taxed on their assets. If we're going to have an aristocracy they should at least start fulfilling the duties of an actual aristocracy.

Posted by: kartoffel at June 30, 2015 08:33 PM (fVxXv)

142
I highly doubt anybody in the audience yelled: "Chelsea, show us your tits!"

Posted by: wth at June 30, 2015 08:34 PM (wAQA5)

143
Ref 117: I saw the Boring Lumpy Young Women open for The Indigo Girls at the 1998 Lilith Fair.

Posted by: Minuteman at June 30, 2015 08:34 PM (HKyCl)

144 There's a lot of well-paid people pretending to be charities, aren't there? It's like an industry.

One charity pays another charity, some get paid to 'fundraise' or 'write grants', a lot of people make big money on the backs of the sick little chillruns.

I almost wonder if that funds a lot of the hate movement against real charities like churches.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:34 PM (oVJmc)

145 For $65K, Chelsea should also treat her audience to a live breastfeeding of her broodlings. Let's get our full feminine freak on, yo!

Posted by: Fritz at June 30, 2015 08:34 PM (o/UmK)

146 There's a lot of well-paid people pretending to be charities, aren't there? It's like an industry.

We're raising awareness.

Posted by: The Susan G. Komen Foundation at June 30, 2015 08:35 PM (8ZskC)

147 Glad that goal came during the commercial break on [AS]

Posted by: logprof USA at June 30, 2015 08:35 PM (JVgzo)

148 For now on, whenever some uppity lefty gets going on corruption, the rich, the environment, or hating brown people, I have one word: FIFA. Some thousands of immigrants are dying there building friggin soccer stadiums. Maybe we should drop that on the lefties during their World Cup finals (yes, they are on, and actually better since it is fit chicks running around).

Posted by: The Governor at June 30, 2015 08:35 PM (K0y5m)

149 Ok, sorry to go off topic but watching hell on wheels and the army guy just said Sherman was coming out to kill all the Indians. And then went off on some racist stuff against Indians and southerners.

This is such a good show. It does have mumble syndrome though...

I wonder how much of college tuition is spent on speakers?

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 08:35 PM (vmMMi)

150 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing their way to fame on their own.

Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)

151 I hope I'm not alone in thinking that "Kwanzaa Kake" is the most condescending, racist crap ever.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (FsuaD)
---
The corn nuts were a nice touch of whimsy.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (jR7Wy)

152 A few months ago I had to deal with a supermodel at a promotional event. it was a very weird experience, probably very similar to dealing with a Clinton or any Prima Donna.

Rule 1 is that random people are NEVER allowed to approach or speak to the supermodel directly. The supermodel has an Exeuctive Assistant or something, and you must first go through that person.

However Rule 2 is that random people are NEVER allowed to approach or speak to a supermodel's Executive Assistant directly either.

Because the Executive Assistant has an assistant as well.

If you have the nerve, you are allowed to approach the assistant's assistant directly. But even that is considered gauche and a bit risky and out-of-line.

What you'r supposed to do is have your assistant contact her assistant's assistant.

You are presumed to NOT have a assistant's assistant, since if you did, you've be at the same social level as the supermodel, and thus you wouldn't be a Random Person.

So if say Kim Kardashian saw Chelsea Clinton at Da Club, they wouldn't have to do the assistant-thing, because the mere fact that they both have multiple layers of assistants means they are on the same level, and thus can speak directly to each other.

But on the other hand, if a Random Person had no assistant, then you may not even be high enough status to speak to an assistant's assistant.

Best would be if you have medium-high social status, and merited one assistant, which would put you in the running to meet the supermodel through the assistant process.

Anyway, after scoping out the social rules, I got someone I worked with (not really my assistant, but a passable substitute) to approach the assistant's assistant, who then granted permission for me to approach her, and then the a.a. took me to meet the Executive Assistant, who sat down and had a mini-meeting with me to see if I was Worthy of speaking to the supermodel.

After about 45 minutes of delicate back-and-forth negotiations, I was granted a 5-minute session.

I imagine dealing with Chelsea and he Five Man Staff is quite similar.

I makes the court of Louis XIV seem like rank amateurs.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (jBuUi)

153 148 For now on, whenever some uppity lefty gets going on corruption, the rich, the environment, or hating brown people, I have one word: FIFA. Some thousands of immigrants are dying there building friggin soccer stadiums. Maybe we should drop that on the lefties during their World Cup finals (yes, they are on, and actually better since it is fit chicks running around).
Posted by: The Governor at June 30, 2015 08:35 PM (K0y5m)

--FIFA gave 100k to the Clinton Foundation.

Posted by: logprof USA! at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (JVgzo)

154 Preach it Jaden.

Posted by: Megan McCain at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (5itIK)

155 Urinal cakes can be a lot of fun, especially ones with a picture of a housefly which you don't really know is just a picture until you pee on it and it doesn't fly away. (This is a means to get more men to direct their stream to the center of the urinal rather than, say, the floor.)

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 08:38 PM (+jijM)

156 So how long did Chelsea spend in the winner's circle with the winning jockey?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:39 PM (oKE6c)

157

well the original Kwanzaa cake was an angel food cake with a bottle of malt liquor in the middle but she thought that was too obvious

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:39 PM (zOTsN)

158 I have no doubt most morons, and a handful of 'ettes, would have been in Mexico within a couple of weeks.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (FsuaD)



Zihuatanejo FTW!

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:40 PM (72D6h)

159 140 was this before her surgical facial enhancements

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:33 PM (zOTsN)


She paid for that face?? LOL.

That's a face you sue over.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 08:40 PM (MYSVz)

160
After about 45 minutes of delicate back-and-forth negotiations, I was granted a 5-minute session.


That's not much time to get her latest insights on quantum gravity in n-space, is it?

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:40 PM (oVJmc)

161 The corn nuts were a nice touch of whimsy.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (jR7Wy)


My favorite touch was the filling of the Kake hole with canned apple pie filling. And then raping the cake with a handful of over-sized "Kwanzaa" Kandles.


What an abomination.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:41 PM (FsuaD)

162 In my day you got rich by courting and marrying a wealthy dowager, not by giving canned speeches for a "donation" to some charitable foundation you founded.

Posted by: John Forbes Kerry at June 30, 2015 08:41 PM (e/W+h)

163 I imagine dealing with Chelsea and he Five Man Staff is quite similar.

I makes the court of Louis XIV seem like rank amateurs.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (jBuUi)

Okay, so if you guys still want AtC as queen, Cochran will have to be her assistant. And he'll need at least four assistants under him. He'll be Grand Vizier or something; now we'll need some Chief Assistants to the Assistant Chief.

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:41 PM (unjBv)

164 >>>Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM<<<

This is why a driveby airbiscuit so much more effective.

Posted by: Fritz at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (o/UmK)

165 If we're going to have an aristocracy they should at least start fulfilling the duties of an actual aristocracy.
Posted by: kartoffel at June 30, 2015 08:33 PM (fVxXv)
----
It's almost Thermidor!

*greases guillotine*

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (jR7Wy)

166 150 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing their way to fame on their own.
Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)



Yeah, no shit.

Posted by: Tori Spelling at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (oKE6c)

167
But Chelsea does have a lot of useless degrees. She's been dodging real life by enrolling in one after another. Odd that she would not want them publicized. What's up with that????

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (iQIUe)

168 150 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing their way to fame on their own.
Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)



Tell me about it.

Posted by: Nicholas Cage at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (oKE6c)

169 Hillary's dog will speak at your function for $500.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (W5DcG)

170 After about 45 minutes of delicate back-and-forth negotiations, I was granted a 5-minute session.

That's not much time to get her latest insights on quantum gravity in n-space, is it?


Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:40 PM (oVJmc)

"I've got three eight balls and a suite at the Waldorf. We doing this?"

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (unjBv)

171 zombie......

wow.....i wonder when there won't be Americans willing to do the executive assistant to the assistant's assistant...can you imagine how abused a naomi campbell assistant is?

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (0O7c5)

172 before she was fired for having the charisma of a urinal cake.

I live for those metaphors from ace. I read another good one from Kevin Williamson of National Review, who referred to Chris Hughes of The New Republic as "an argyle sock of a man."

lol

Posted by: Eisenhorn at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (J9FkY)

173 Okay, so if you guys still want AtC as queen, Cochran will have to be her assistant. And he'll need at least four assistants under him. He'll be Grand Vizier or something; now we'll need some Chief Assistants to the Assistant Chief.

Posted by: Secundus
****
I'll be that guy who stands in the back of the court with a serious look on his face, nodding sagely at times when ATC speaks.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (F0Cog)

174 She paid for that face?? LOL.



That's a face you sue over.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 08:40 PM (MYSVz)


She actually had a chin implant and surgery for her too-visible gum line. Among other things.

I don't hold out much hope for the Princess Baby in the looks department, unless the daddy has looks on his side.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (FsuaD)

175 That's not much time to get her latest insights on quantum gravity in n-space, is it?
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel


It went almost exactly as you might expect.

Despite being truly fabulously beautiful (more beautiful in person than in any photo), she was an absolute cretin. Could speak of nothing but herself. Unbridled narcissism. She had no knowledge of any topic than wasn't herself. It was kind of spooky.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (jBuUi)

176 O/T I never thought that Grace Jones was pretty. There is a certain masculinity about her,


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (baR5c)

177 150 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely
on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing
their way to fame on their own.
Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)



True dat.

Posted by: Every Fucking Kennedy since Joe Sr., the crook at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (oKE6c)

178 I hope I'm not alone in thinking that "Kwanzaa Kake" is the most condescending, racist crap ever.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:28 PM (FsuaD)


Yes, with the possible exception of "The Old Negro Space Program", which is an eternal classic:

http://tinyurl.com/The-Old-Negro-Space-Program

Posted by: Sharkman at June 30, 2015 08:44 PM (72D6h)

179 So what did you learn in the five minutes you were graced with zombie?

Posted by: f'd at June 30, 2015 08:44 PM (BO/km)

180 Another Goooooooal!

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:44 PM (p0KI9)

181
Goal haaaaa......

2 -- 0 USA.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:44 PM (MDgS8)

182 Someone call 911!! Ace is en fuego!!

Posted by: Weasel at June 30, 2015 08:45 PM (e3bId)

183 Okay, so if you guys still want AtC as queen, Cochran will have to be her assistant. And he'll need at least four assistants under him. He'll be Grand Vizier or something; now we'll need some Chief Assistants to the Assistant Chief.

Posted by: Secundus
****
I volunteer for Mistress at Arms.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:45 PM (jR7Wy)

184
She reminds me of that scene in the Godfather where Connie walks around with the big silk purse and people stuff cash into it.

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:45 PM (iQIUe)

185 Speaking of throwing money away, Greece just defaulted on their debt.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at June 30, 2015 08:45 PM (/i3Yt)

186 I makes the court of Louis XIV seem like rank amateurs.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:37 PM (jBuUi)


Comes the revolution, they won't be emulating Louis XIV, but rather Louis XVI.

Posted by: Every Fucking Kennedy since Joe Sr., the crook at June 30, 2015 08:46 PM (oKE6c)

187 Arianna Huffington pulled this BS, too. When she was running for something about 10 years ago and had to disclose she paid almost no taxes b/c she earned nothing. However, her "foundation" paid for her mansion, utilities, travel, cars, makeup, food, insurance, clothes, etc.

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:46 PM (iQIUe)

188
Perusing the headlines - How does one make Obama popular?, just elect a GOP congress to help him along! - see Breitbart

Also Afflek! has been divorced by Jen Garner. - see somewhere else.

Matt Damon made a statement - "Matt Damon!"

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (ODxAs)

189 Puerto Rico is just behind Greece, looking for some action.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (baR5c)

190 179 So what did you learn in the five minutes you were graced with zombie?
Posted by: f'd


Basically nothing. Everything was "fabulous" and name-drop name-drop name-drop celebrity fabulous me me me me.

That's about all I remember.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (jBuUi)

191 I forgot about the Clinton years and how completely horrible they were.


So idyllic, ....now.

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Staring at the Lake in the rain at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (CFcIt)

192 I hope I'm not alone in thinking that "Kwanzaa Kake" is the most condescending, racist crap ever.



Is that the one with fly on it?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (oKE6c)

193 The US is beating someone in soccer?
Are we playing blind cripples?

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (F0Cog)

194 150 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing their way to fame on their own.
Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)

I agree!

Posted by: Christopher Buckley at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (5itIK)

195 She had no knowledge of any topic than wasn't herself. It was kind of spooky.

So, obviously, the many layers of bureaucracy were merely pretentious social pecking-order stuff, not actually preserving her valuable time for improving the State of Man.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (oVJmc)

196 Connie was pretty

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (zOTsN)

197 180 Another Goooooooal!
Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:44 PM (p0KI9)


--Dammut, missed it!

Posted by: logprof USA!! at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (JVgzo)

198 Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (F0Cog)

Timmah!

Posted by: Timmy at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (unjBv)

199 >>if you guys still want AtC as queen


There is no 'want' in Alextopia.

There is only the Will of our Benevolent Queen.

And many step stools.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (p0KI9)

200 Taxes are for the little people.

Posted by: Helmsley at June 30, 2015 08:49 PM (baR5c)

201 Affleck got divorced? She must have found out one of his ancestors owned slaves.

There's a lot of that going around.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 08:49 PM (bQYVO)

202 And many step stools.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:48 PM (p0KI9)

Well, the step stools are gonna need step stools too

Posted by: Timmy at June 30, 2015 08:49 PM (unjBv)

203 She actually had a chin implant and surgery for her too-visible gum line. Among other things.

Damn! She needs more. No wonder she charges so much.

I don't hold out much hope for the Princess Baby in the looks department, unless the daddy has looks on his side.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:43 PM (FsuaD)


Looks .... no. But that baby is certainly going to have a hell of a pedigree in criminality from both sides of that putrid family.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (MYSVz)

204 128 behold the new royalty kiss the ring

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 08:29 PM (zOTsN)



They'll have to drop their drawers first, to provide access.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (oKE6c)

205 omg......michael sam and his boy friend are not going to get married......they broke up......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (0O7c5)

206 Wait, was that a height joke or a groveling sycophant joke?

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (unjBv)

207 The Clintons are selling their daughter...ok may be Vince Foster's daughter...and it is not news.

There is no lowEST with the Clinton's.

Posted by: The roost aint what it used to be at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (7GI9v)

208 >>US is beating someone in soccer?
Are we playing blind cripples


It's Girl Soccer.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (p0KI9)

209 3 minutes extra time...

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:51 PM (MDgS8)

210 She reminds me of that scene in the Godfather where Connie walks around with the big silk purse and people stuff cash into it.
Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:45 PM (iQIUe)


Oh, peshaw...... those were criminals.

Umm, wait.....

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Staring at the Lake in the rain at June 30, 2015 08:51 PM (CFcIt)

211 193 The US is beating someone in soccer?
Are we playing blind cripples?
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:47 PM (F0Cog)



We're beating someone in kickball?


Who cares?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:51 PM (oKE6c)

212
Goal haaaaa...... 2 -- 0 USA.
Posted by: eleven




Let me get this straight. You're watching women's soccer? Voluntarily?

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (kdS6q)

213 omg......michael sam and his boy friend are not going to get married......they broke up......

I blame the Catholic Church, those h8rz.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (oVJmc)

214 She was probably bored after 5 seconds like Ace. That's how celebrities are.

I'd love to have a couple of hours with you though. Shall I have my people contact your people?

Posted by: f'd at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (BO/km)

215 I would pay 65 large not to have to mingle with that disgusting little bitch!

Posted by: tbd at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (ol8Qh)

216 It's Girl Soccer.

Posted by: Garrett
****
Then it doesn't count x2.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (F0Cog)

217 Existence is a requirement for fame and notoriety?

Posted by: Sasquatch at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (+jijM)

218 It's Girl Soccer.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (p0KI9)

What's the over/under in the proportion of dykes?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (oKE6c)

219 Let me get this straight. You're watching women's soccer? Voluntarily?

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (kdS6q)

"Women's" is the operative word. See also: "Women's college volleyball"

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (unjBv)

220 Ooops:

"
AP Top News at 7:59 p.m. EDT
Greece's bailout expires, country defaults on IMF payment
ATHENS, Greece (AP) - Greece slipped deeper into its financial abyss after the bailout program it has relied on for five years expired at midnight Tuesday and the country failed to repay a loan due to the International Monetary Fund, deepening fears over whether it will be able to remain in the eurozone. "

Am I a bad person for hoping It All Collapses?

I want the Euro to fall apart. I want the Eurozone to follow. Then the EC.

Enough with the transnational crypto-communism!

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (jBuUi)

221 If I had a calling, it would be "Fluffier of the royal rack"



If I had a calling.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (VPLuQ)

222 The US is beating someone in soccer?
Are we playing blind cripples?


Everybody gets a trophy.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (oVJmc)

223 U! S! A!

U! S! A!

Posted by: logprof USA!!! at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (JVgzo)

224 >>Let me get this straight. You're watching women's soccer? Voluntarily?



At any second, the four or five hot ones could lock up in anDaisy Chain.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (p0KI9)

225 Her accomplishments -- nothing. Count your blessings America.

Posted by: Jean at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (ztOda)

226 216 It's Girl Soccer.
Posted by: Garrett
****
Then it doesn't count x2.
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:52 PM (F0Cog)



It's not arithmetic, it's geometric, and hence it doesn't count ^2.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (oKE6c)

227 205 omg......michael sam and his boy friend are not going to get married......they broke up......
Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 08:50 PM (0O7c5)


Something something no mansion, but bungalow with a woodburner something no Lamborghini, but a used Chevy.

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Staring at the Lake in the rain at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (CFcIt)

228 (Yes, Chelsea has a five man staff.)






I saw 5 man staff open for the Five Man Electrical Band in 1970

Posted by: TheQuietMan at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (DiZBp)

229 That creepy lesbian domestic violencers married annulled baby mammas are having twins.

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (iQIUe)

230 So, I wonder if Chelsea would be willing to come to Savannah and speak to poor, black young women?

On her own dime.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (FsuaD)

231
*tee hee hee*

kick

*tee hee hee*

Posted by: Girl's Soccer

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (kdS6q)

232 At any second, the four or five hot ones could lock up in anDaisy Chain.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (p0KI9)


I don't think they have coverage of the showers afterwards.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (oKE6c)

233 Woot.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (MDgS8)

234 214 She was probably bored after 5 seconds like Ace. That's how celebrities are.

I'd love to have a couple of hours with you though. Shall I have my people contact your people?
Posted by: f'd


Have your people's people's people's people contact my people's people's people's people.

Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:55 PM (jBuUi)

235 Why did we bring the Subaru!?

Posted by: Guy in the Lot After Women's Soccer Match at June 30, 2015 08:55 PM (p0KI9)

236 What's the over/under in the proportion of dykes? <<<<<<<<

Yes.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at June 30, 2015 08:55 PM (ODxAs)

237 Is women's soccer anything like the WNBA?
I'm still waiting for one of them to come out of the closet and say she's straight.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 08:55 PM (bQYVO)

238 Everybody gets a trophy.


Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (oVJmc)

All right, I'll tee this one up for the Horde: what shape is the trophy? D cells or what?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 08:55 PM (oKE6c)

239 That creepy lesbian domestic violencers married annulled baby mammas are having twins.

Turkey baster accident?

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (oVJmc)

240 It's not arithmetic, it's geometric, and hence it doesn't count ^2.


Posted by: Jay Guevara
****

Metric fascist.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (F0Cog)

241 ***POOM*** Woohoo!!

Just heard the first fireworks boom and drunken yahoo fistpump of the holiday weekend!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (jR7Wy)

242 Give to the Clinton Global Foundation.

Because you will anyway indirectly.

And the life you save just might be Chelsea's.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (oFCZn)

243 I don't care who her parents are, or how rich they are, she still looks like Webb Hubbell..............bless her heart.

Posted by: kakypat at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (HUXet)

244 It disgusts me to see some talentless hack rise to fame entirely on the success of their parents instead of working hard and clawing their way to fame on their own.

Posted by: Jaden Smith at June 30, 2015 08:36 PM (e/W+h)


Word up!

Posted by: Ron Jr & Patti Davis at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (5itIK)

245 I'm going out to look at Venus and Jupiter attempting to occupy the same space in the sky. Hillary's spawn is probably more important, but I wanted plenty of room to puke.

Posted by: goon at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (gy5kE)

246


Have your people's people's people's people contact my people's people's people's people.


Six Degrees of Social Secretaries.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 08:56 PM (oVJmc)

247 233 Woot.
Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (MDgS


--This was anticlimax. Final should be mop-up.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 08:57 PM (JVgzo)

248 Am I a bad person for hoping It All Collapses?

I want the Euro to fall apart. I want the Eurozone to follow. Then the EC.

Enough with the transnational crypto-communism!
Posted by: zombie at June 30, 2015 08:53 PM (jBuUi)


Well, not unless you're praying for it.

...

No, I'm not ....... seriously, I'm not.

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Staring at the Lake in the rain at June 30, 2015 08:57 PM (CFcIt)

249 >>> having the charisma of a urinal cake.

dude...

Posted by: urinal cake at June 30, 2015 08:57 PM (PY/7D)

250 I am begining to think Abby Wambach has two penises.

Posted by: Garrett at June 30, 2015 08:58 PM (p0KI9)

251 The are paying to see the Democrat Princess....


Posted by: Mob Member #6 at June 30, 2015 08:58 PM (qh617)

252 Japan or England right logprof?

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 08:58 PM (MDgS8)

253 I'd bet if you paid Lena Dunham $65K to speak at your gala, you'd at least get a hummer or a handy out of the deal.

Posted by: Fritz at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (o/UmK)

254 psst... I'm not really a cake.


Mostly I'm kinda minty, but most peeps won't take a bite

Posted by: urinal cake at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (PY/7D)

255 The hardest part of coching girls' soccer is getting them to kick just the ball.

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (+jijM)

256 Is women's soccer anything like the WNBA?
I'm still waiting for one of them to come out of the closet and say she's straight.

Posted by: Hank
****

Snork

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (F0Cog)

257 omg......michael sam and his boy friend are not going to get married......they broke up





Trying to piggy back off of Bruce Jenner, next week he'll come out as Michelle Sam.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at June 30, 2015 09:00 PM (DiZBp)

258 Make Chelsea the ambassador to Cuba.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at June 30, 2015 09:00 PM (W5DcG)

259 When a Hillary Clinton has a kid, come on, what more could you expect?

Posted by: tbd at June 30, 2015 09:00 PM (ol8Qh)

260 Trying to piggy back off of Bruce Jenner, next week he'll come out as Michelle Sam.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at June 30, 2015 09:00 PM (DiZBp)

his boyfriend was a twink......*jazz hands*

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 09:01 PM (0O7c5)

261
I have no Arby's within 25 miles of me. I grew up with an Arby's in my city. Today there's no Arby's near Boston.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:01 PM (ye7KB)

262 Lena Dunham+a blowie= total boner killer


eye bleach all around

Posted by: moron #73 at June 30, 2015 09:02 PM (PY/7D)

263 Most of the members of the USA Women's soccer team are quite feminine and doable. By men.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:02 PM (JVgzo)

264 I saw 5 man staff open for the Five Man Electrical Band in 1970
Posted by: TheQuietMan at June 30, 2015 08:54 PM (DiZBp)


I bet there were signs everywhere.

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (+jijM)

265 As you may have heard,
Baltimore's mayor wants to address the issue of all those yucky Confederate monuments around the city.


So I asked the neighbor across the street if we were no longer going to honor the Gay Confederate soldiers who gave their lives for the cause.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (VPLuQ)

266 253
I'd bet if you paid Lena Dunham $65K to speak at your gala, you'd at least get a hummer or a handy out of the deal.

Posted by: Fritz at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (o/UmK)

For $75 K she'll leave out the hummer or handy.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (oKE6c)

267 Hope Solo is purty.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (MDgS8)

268 Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:01 PM (ye7KB)

Having eaten at Arby's, all I can say is,

This is a problem...?

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (unjBv)

269 255 The hardest part of coching girls' soccer is getting them to kick just the ball.
Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 08:59 PM (+jijM)



How do you cooch them? I'm confused.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:04 PM (oKE6c)

270 Effectively tomorrow, in Georgia, it will be legal to buy airborne fireworks.

WTF could possibly go wrong?

"Hold my beer and watch this sh*t, boys!"

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:05 PM (FsuaD)

271 263 Most of the members of the USA Women's soccer team are quite feminine and doable. By men.
Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:02 PM (JVgzo)



So they're under cover.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:05 PM (oKE6c)

272 258 Make Chelsea the ambassador to s]Cuba Libya.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at June 30, 2015 09:00 PM (W5DcG)



FIFY.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:06 PM (oKE6c)

273 267 Hope Solo is purty.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (MDgS


Apparently she's also a raging alcoholic who likes to get into fist fights.

So, you know, marriage material too.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at June 30, 2015 09:06 PM (oFCZn)

274 267 Hope Solo is purty.
Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (MDgS

--She's gorgeous. And batshit crazy.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:07 PM (JVgzo)

275 Apparently she's also a raging alcoholic who likes to get into fist fights.

So, you know, marriage material too.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at June 30, 2015 09:06 PM (oFCZn)

*Sigh* Okay, what's her nic?

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:07 PM (unjBv)

276 So I asked the neighbor across the street if we were no longer going to honor the Gay Confederate soldiers who gave their lives for the cause.


Do you mean the Stonewall Rebellion?

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 09:07 PM (+jijM)

277 One guy had a fireworks mortar he was holding take off his head. A kid holding some sort of fireworks dies after it exploded into his chest. Cant be too careful.

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 09:07 PM (iQIUe)

278 Make Chelsea ambassador to Afghanistan. Of course, her "all male" entourage might be questionable to the practitioners of the Religion of Peace.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (FsuaD)

279
I like her.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (MDgS8)

280 My college hosted someone once whose name I won't mention, but you would recognize.

I was somehow invited to dinner with said individual prior to the speech.

Dear lord. A more self loving jackass I've never met. I'm sure we paid said jackass very well.

I guess it could have been worse though. I could have been forced to have dinner with Helen Thomas, who came to speak a few months later.

Posted by: Lauren at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (MYCIw)

281 I was watching a sports show and it had a segment on the alarming numbers of concussions in girl's soccer. 100K or so. A lot of them from headers and a lot from heading another player instead of the ball.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (bQYVO)

282 The sky is blue, the grass is green, mercenary political witches are mercenary political witches.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (ry4ab)

283 >>270 Effectively tomorrow, in Georgia, it will be legal to buy airborne fireworks.

It wasn't before? Technically it's illegal in city limits here (although it never seems to stop anyone) but you can buy all the fireworks you can outside of town. My parents neighbors do a long show every year.

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (vmMMi)

284 Apparently she's also a raging alcoholic who likes to get into fist fights.




Yeah, totally feminine.


"Mom, I'd like you to meet ... (turning aside) Hope, don't spit on the floor ... my future wife."

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (oKE6c)

285 So I asked the neighbor across the street if we were no longer going to honor the Gay Confederate soldiers who gave their lives for the cause.
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at June 30, 2015 09:03 PM (VPLuQ)
----
Their very invisibility tells you they're everywhere! From Irene Monroe, "nationally renowned AA lebian activist, scholar, theologian, and writer":

"Queer Civil War buffs have been arguing for some time that the deafening silence around lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) Confederate and Union soldiers indicates proof of their very presence."

We need to do a Moron Civil War tour in Bulmer.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (jR7Wy)

286 $65,000 for Chelsea Clinton and there's not a happy ending in sight.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (AC0lD)

287 At least McCartney doesn't look exactly like Howdy Doody. And she has actual marketable skills ... bet she can fix a rip in yer jeans, rather than just being a rip in some jeans.

Posted by: goon at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (gy5kE)

288 "How far did you make it?"

My time: -30s. Yes, negative. Saw that it was going to be Chelsea, saw that it was on the NBC News site, couldn't be arsed to wait for the page to load and the video to buffer. Not going to waste my life giving even a modicum of attention to that family of grifters while there's Destiny to be played. (Let the chosen point of contrast sink in. Aaaaaand ... there.)

Posted by: PCachu at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (gR+qu)

289 Isn't Hope Sole like 6 foot 2 and 200 pounds?


bet she'd make barky look like a sissy

What's obama? like 165?

barky can curl thos silver dumbells real nice tho

Posted by: moron #73 at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (PY/7D)

290
I like her.

I think she's nice.

Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (MDgS8)

291 167
But Chelsea does have a lot of useless degrees. She's been dodging real life by enrolling in one after another. Odd that she would not want them publicized. What's up with that????

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 08:42 PM (iQIUe)

Someone might ask her a question someone with her degrees should be able to answer.

Posted by: JB1000 at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (WLJbV)

292 281 I was watching a sports show and it had a segment on the alarming numbers of concussions in girl's soccer. 100K or so. A lot of them from headers and a lot from heading another player instead of the ball.
Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (bQYVO)



They need to start playing soccer with a bowling ball. Make the soccer problem self-correcting.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (oKE6c)

293 I like her.
Posted by: eleven at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (MDgS

--Me too. But A) I'm spoken for. B) She's like setting off an M-80. Or three.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (JVgzo)

294 In better news, the USA Women's World Cup team is advancing to the championship game! They defeated GERMANY 2-0!! Woot!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!!

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (ry4ab)

295 Thanks for the link to that video: her ugly mug cracked my damn monitor. What has she got, permanent mumps?

Another waste of skin whose extravagant lie-style is paid for by his "charity": Shithead Sharpton.

Posted by: Beverly at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (LuDhq)

296 Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (jR7Wy)

It's the new Sluggish Schizophrenia. The only symptom is that there are no symptoms

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (unjBv)

297 Hillary's dog will dump on your lawn --for a negotiated fee.

Posted by: The roost aint what it used to be at June 30, 2015 09:11 PM (7GI9v)

298 I present to you the unmitigated gall of the .001 percent....

Posted by: Manolo at June 30, 2015 09:11 PM (Z+kHZ)

299 Isn't Hope Sole like 6 foot 2 and 200 pounds?



I say again: totally feminine.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:11 PM (oKE6c)

300 The "charisma of a urinal cake"... Ace should be writing the obituaries for the Times.

Posted by: Ever at June 30, 2015 09:11 PM (hRV3r)

301 "Queer Civil War buffs have been arguing for some time that the
deafening silence around lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer
(LGBTQ) Confederate and Union soldiers indicates proof of their very
presence."


The lack of a conspiracy proves there is one!

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 09:12 PM (oVJmc)

302 294 In better news, the USA Women's World Cup team is advancing to the championship game! They defeated GERMANY 2-0!! Woot!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!!
Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (ry4ab)



BFD.


Let's make soccer interesting and play by meso-American rules: losing team gets executed.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:12 PM (oKE6c)

303 255
The hardest part of coching girls' soccer is getting them to kick just the ball.
----------
Yeah, the little darlings are pony-tailed viragoes of the first order.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:12 PM (ry4ab)

304 >>Dear lord. A more self loving jackass I've never met. I'm sure we paid said jackass very well

We had speakers and politicians in particular all the time, but one time we had an author come to host a symposium for three hours. She had no prepared remarka, and took questions for three hours. the entire time she was EATiNG and talking with her mouth full! So tacky. This lady won a Pulitzer, btw, for a mediocre book.

We talked about her for years.

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 09:12 PM (vmMMi)

305 Never mind all of this. The big news is that I swept Boner in our quarters match this evening. The Orange One is driving the porcelain bus as I write. *hic*

Posted by: Ready For Hillary!!11!! at June 30, 2015 09:13 PM (Dwehj)

306 283
>>270 Effectively tomorrow, in Georgia, it will be legal to buy airborne fireworks.



It wasn't before? Technically it's illegal in city limits here
(although it never seems to stop anyone) but you can buy all the
fireworks you can outside of town. My parents neighbors do a long show
every year.

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 09:09 PM (vmMMi)


Nope. You could fire off the noisy ones, but in SC you could buy (and illegally) shoot off the airborne 'spodey ones. So, yay. Now the idiots in GA can kill themselves and their buddies and family members. I don't have a dog in this hunt so I don't really care. Too much.


Biggest worry in Savannah every holiday are the yutes in the hood firing their weapons in the air. The fact that bullets have to land somewhere, has never registered.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:13 PM (FsuaD)

307 281 I was watching a sports show and it had a segment on the alarming numbers of concussions in girl's soccer. 100K or so. A lot of them from headers and a lot from heading another player instead of the ball.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:08 PM (bQYVO)


Puh-leeeeease. This "concussion" crap is too much. It's the new thing. Every time someone taps their head it's determined to be a concussion. It's mostly bullshit.

I had to go through this moronic concussion talk when I took my nephew to soccer. The kid telling me about it clearly had no idea what a concussion is, nor what a brain is. Yeah ... soccer concussions ... the horror!!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:13 PM (MYSVz)

308 302 Let's make soccer interesting and play by meso-American rules: losing team gets executed.
-------
That may have already happened to the PRC "steel roses".

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:14 PM (ry4ab)

309 289 Isn't Hope Sole like 6 foot 2 and 200 pounds?


bet she'd make barky look like a sissy

What's obama? like 165?

barky can curl thos silver dumbells real nice tho
Posted by: moron #73 at June 30, 2015 09:10 PM (PY/7D)

--I think she's 5'8" or 5'9". Still, tall for a chick.

No doubt she could kick Baraka's ass. Love to see her slide-tackle the First Samsquamptch.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:14 PM (JVgzo)

310 I'm a total moron. I'd watch women's soccer if they learned from womens beach volleyball uniforms.

Posted by: moron #73 at June 30, 2015 09:14 PM (PY/7D)

311 Watched the entire chelsea clinton clip.

wow does she suck.

But paul mccartneys daughter seems cool. Except for the whole vegetarian thing.

Posted by: mynewhandle at June 30, 2015 09:15 PM (AkOaV)

312 Chelsea looks like she has a chronic case of the mumps and her moms looks like a hamster that stuffed too much popcorn in its cheeks.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:15 PM (bQYVO)

313 "Queer Civil War buffs have been arguing for some time that the

deafening silence around lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer

(LGBTQ) Confederate and Union soldiers indicates proof of their very

presence."

The lack of a conspiracy proves there is one!


Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 09:12 PM (oVJmc)

The conspiracy is obviously at the very highest level because it's been covered up so well there's not a trace of it in any public records.

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 09:15 PM (ftVQq)

314 I had to go through this moronic concussion talk
when I took my nephew to soccer. The kid telling me about it clearly
had no idea what a concussion is, nor what a brain is. Yeah ... soccer
concussions ... the horror!!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:13 PM (MYSVz)

Any excuse to get soccer banned is a good excuse. Prey upon the stupidity and neuroses of the soccer moms by telling them their special snowflakes are losing five IQ points with every header.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:15 PM (oKE6c)

315 But Chelsea does have a lot of useless degrees. She's been dodging real life by enrolling in one after another.


Her school loan debt must be astronomical!

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 09:16 PM (+jijM)

316 >>301 "Queer Civil War buffs have been arguing for some time that the deafening silence around lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) Confederate and Union soldiers indicates proof of their very presence.

Hilarious.

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (vmMMi)

317 Soccer is thrilling.

Posted by: Paint Drying at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (Dwehj)

318 The conspiracy is obviously at the very highest level because it's been covered up so well there's not a trace of it in any public records.
Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 09:15 PM (ftVQq)
---

"I will make George howl!" -- William T. Sherman

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (jR7Wy)

319 Hope Solo would probably be like the Famke Janssen character from Goldeneye.

She'll beat the shit our of you in a crazy rage, then crush you to death between her thighs during the make up sex.

Posted by: where do I sign up at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (21zCy)

320 Two of the most unattractive, and unlikeable, presidents' daughters:

Amy Carter

Chelsea Clinton

Amy is/has been as pissy and mean as her angry mother.

Chelsea, as well.

What is it with entitled, spoiled Democrat hell spawn?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (FsuaD)

321 277...guy had a fireworks mortar he was holding take off his head.
***
I hid on a rickety platform in a giant oak tree where the city set up the July 4th show...an errant mortar set off the cache....it was right underneath the tree...
hilarity did not ensue...

Posted by: Mr Wizard at June 30, 2015 09:18 PM (hCdMd)

322 307 Puh-leeeeease. This "concussion" crap is too much. It's the new
thing. Every time someone taps their head it's determined to be a
concussion. It's mostly bullshit.



I had to go through this moronic concussion talk when I took my
nephew to soccer. The kid telling me about it clearly had no idea what a
concussion is, nor what a brain is. Yeah ... soccer concussions ...
the horror!!
-------------
I heard that. If the stats were really that high all the girls and boys would be playing in special ed helmets like the hockey players. Getting one's noggin rung like the Liberty Bell is a rite of passage for aggressive game winning forwards. Too much crap about safety by prissy whiners who want to wrap all players in safety foam, and probably not keep score too. Germany had one gal get an abrasion from the heading collision in the game; the trainer tied a bandage on and she played the rest of the game. She made half the injured list in a given NFL weekend look like pussies.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:19 PM (ry4ab)

323 At least Amy Carter went to public screwels.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:19 PM (bQYVO)

324 319
Hope Solo would probably be like the Famke Janssen character from Goldeneye.

She'll beat the shit our of you in a crazy rage, then crush you to death between her thighs during the make up sex.
-----------
So, death by snu-snu then?

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:20 PM (ry4ab)

325 ...Queer Civil War buffs...

well the Yankees must have been...
My great grandpa said
"Those cocksuckers won the war.."

Posted by: Mr Wizard at June 30, 2015 09:20 PM (hCdMd)

326 "I will make George howl!" -- William T. Sherman

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (jR7Wy)

"I slept with him when he was drunk, he slept with me when I was crazy, and now we sleep with each other always."

-- With apologies to both men, for joking on one of the greatest quotes ever

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:20 PM (unjBv)

327 310 I'm a total moron. I'd watch women's soccer if they learned from womens beach volleyball uniforms.

Posted by: moron #73 at June 30, 2015 09:14 PM (PY/7D)


Women's tennis. Some very pretty women. Fairly coordinated. ... and for those who are into it, half of them squeal at the top of their lungs like they were porn stars. Annoying as hell on the court but some might appreciate it elsewhere.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:20 PM (MYSVz)

328 "I will make George howl!" -- William T. Sherman



Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:17 PM (jR7Wy)

"Prancing Through Georgia" -- William T. Sherman


Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 09:20 PM (ftVQq)

329 Women's tennis. Some very pretty women. Fairly coordinated. ... and for those who are into it, half of them squeal at the top of their lungs like they were porn stars. Annoying as hell on the court but some might appreciate it elsewhere.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair
****

I don't watch it. I just listen to it with surround sound.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:21 PM (F0Cog)

330 i watched the entire video.....may i have my ampersands back? please? for the love of GOD

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at June 30, 2015 09:21 PM (0O7c5)

331 The mass of a soccer ball vs. mass of the head and brain?

Yeah, not seeing a concussion from that.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 09:21 PM (oVJmc)

332 Oh goody. Megyn Kelly is about to have fun with Hillary's(!) e-mails.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (FsuaD)

333 If Hillary Clinton's Speaking Fee of $237,000 Is Too Much For You,
You Can Hire Her Useless Failure-Puddle of a Daughter for $65,000




How much for zombie Buddy?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (oKE6c)

334

for fucks sake

now some ass has made a map of the US alleging to find segregation in red states and inetgration in blue states


just in time to support barky mcfucksticks initiative to forcefully integrate with HUD

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (zOTsN)

335 I don't watch it. I just listen to it with surround sound.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:21 PM (F0Cog)

Knew a guy who used to watch "The L Word" with the sound muted

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (unjBv)

336 What the clinton's need is the RICO Act

Posted by: Nevergiveup at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (/tNwW)

337 USA is on to the finals by the way

Posted by: Nevergiveup at June 30, 2015 09:23 PM (/tNwW)

338 331 The mass of a soccer ball vs. mass of the head and brain?
Yeah, not seeing a concussion from that.
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 09:21 PM (oVJmc)



Mass of a bullet vs. mass of the head and brain? No problem.

It's momentum you need to worry about, not mass.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:23 PM (oKE6c)

339 Hope Solo would probably be like the Famke Janssen character from Goldeneye.

She'll beat the shit our of you in a crazy rage, then crush you to death between her thighs during the make up sex.

--

It beats the old standby: "Shot by a jealous husband"

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at June 30, 2015 09:23 PM (/i3Yt)

340 just in time to support barky mcfucksticks initiative to forcefully integrate with HUD

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (zOTsN)

I'm prepared to bet my next paycheck that neighborhoods in the old Confederacy have a fuckton more integration than Northern cities

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (unjBv)

341 She created fantastic buzz on NBC News, too, before she was fired for having the charisma of a urinal cake.
...
Contest: Play this video -- Chelsea Clinton talking with Stella McCartney about how harrrrd it is to have rich parents -- and watch the counter.

Tell me the time at which you Tap Out...

********

Shit, even I can't watch that for very long.

Any time some lady friend asks you if you'd like to go halves on a bastard, just say no ... and whatever you do NEVER go out for drinks with said lady friend after she proposes going halves on a bastard.

Posted by: Webb Hubbell at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (IziAx)

342 I read years ago that Harry Truman retired to his white frame house in KC, and couldn't afford to have it painted. So he went to Ike, to say in effect it's just not dignified to have a President of the great United States live like this, and is there anything you can do about it? Anyone know where I can read about this?

FWIW, I have no complaint about Truman's request - an ex-President should have a pension of some sort. Far, far far better than the blatant corruption that goes on now.

Posted by: MacGeorge at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (tSYHw)

343 USA is on to the finals by the way

Posted by: Nevergiveup
****

Our lesbians licked their lesbians...um, wait.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (F0Cog)

344
Does anyone else think Mike Flynn's campaign logo looks more like signage for an ice cream parlor?

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (ye7KB)

345 Jane, did this ever make the news where you live?



http://tinyurl.com/ndaqxrr

Posted by: bergerbilder at June 30, 2015 09:25 PM (+jijM)

346 337
USA is on to the finals by the way.
--------------
That is true, by Sunday night they will be #1 or #2 (again). Match is in Vancouver, the official Women's World Cup this year. man, Vancouver has been getting a lot of events recently, they are the richest city on the Pacific coast, right?

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:25 PM (ry4ab)

347
My STFU moment occurred at 2:40

As for urinal cakes - when they get quite small, you cab chase them around the "bowl" with you urine stream, so even they have more personality than the Chelster.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 09:25 PM (95CzI)

348 Our lesbians licked their lesbians...um, wait.
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (F0Cog)

Actually they are mostly heterosexual.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at June 30, 2015 09:26 PM (/tNwW)

349 Does anyone else think Mike Flynn's campaign logo looks more like signage for an ice cream parlor?

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (ye7KB)

Beer label. Like Grolsch

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:26 PM (unjBv)

350 USA is on to the finals by the way

__________

Not sure I can stand the excitement.


I would have said "mounting excitement," but they probably don't allow TV cameras into the shower room.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:26 PM (oKE6c)

351
Beer label. Like Grolsch

That too.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:26 PM (ye7KB)

352 Actually they are mostly heterosexual.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at June 30, 2015 09:26 PM (/tNwW)

Right.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:27 PM (oKE6c)

353 Dustin Cable, the data scientist who devised the racial dot map (and now works for Facebook), says he doesn't expect the racial dynamics to appear dramatically different in the 2020 census. The newest colors on the map may come from growth in Hispanic communities and among those identifying as multiracial, an option only recently added to the census.

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:27 PM (zOTsN)

354 I made it to 2:32 on the Chelsea/Stella McCartney interview.

Two spoiled brats, whining about fame and fortune.

No thanks.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:27 PM (FsuaD)

355 RICO is the Maytag repairman of legislative enactments.

Posted by: Paint Drying at June 30, 2015 09:28 PM (Dwehj)

356 Truman should have had a couple of autobiographies written up before he became preezy. Something like It Takes a A-Bomb.

Posted by: Hank at June 30, 2015 09:28 PM (bQYVO)

357
Holy cats, what did Flynn's second choice look like??

That signage/logo is awful.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:28 PM (ye7KB)

358 Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:27 PM (zOTsN)

So was he mapping everyone, or facebook users?

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:28 PM (unjBv)

359 Vancouver > San Diego> Seattle> San Francisco


But Victoria > Vancouver

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:29 PM (JVgzo)

360 340 just in time to support barky mcfucksticks initiative to forcefully integrate with HUD
Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (zOTsN)

I'm prepared to bet my next paycheck that neighborhoods in the old Confederacy have a fuckton more integration than Northern cities
Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (unjBv)

I suspect this will turn out to be as accurate as all the ' food desert' propaganda.

There is no way the south is less integrated than the north at any rate. I cant speak to the Midwest

Posted by: Lea at June 30, 2015 09:29 PM (vmMMi)

361 those identifying as multiracial, an option only recently added to the census.

Ummm, sooooo people had to identify as a race they were not. That couldn't have skewed the numbers or anything.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:29 PM (F0Cog)

362 Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:28 PM (ye7KB)

Old Gothic, with umlauts

Posted by: Secundus at June 30, 2015 09:29 PM (unjBv)

363 All of that running makes my head hurt. I think that I will sue soccer.

Posted by: goon at June 30, 2015 09:30 PM (gy5kE)

364 345
Jane, did this ever make the news where you live?







http://tinyurl.com/ndaqxrr



Ummm....no. We have trouble keeping up with the daily black-on-black crime here.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:30 PM (FsuaD)

365 350
USA is on to the finals by the way

__________

Not sure I can stand the excitement.


I would have said "mounting excitement," but they probably don't allow TV cameras into the shower room.
-----------------
We're talking women's soccer here Jay, not the St Louis Cardinals.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:30 PM (ry4ab)

366 Ack, I only made it to 2:48.

Posted by: Infidel at June 30, 2015 09:31 PM (HN5+8)

367 So was he mapping everyone, or facebook users?

Facebook users who feel compelled to take a picture of every meal before it is consumed.

Posted by: Paint Drying at June 30, 2015 09:31 PM (Dwehj)

368 Well, I'm gonna go read for a bit.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 30, 2015 09:31 PM (FsuaD)

369 Our lesbians licked their lesbians...um, wait.
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (F0Cog)

--More male athletes are rump wranglers than female athletes are rug-chmpers.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (JVgzo)

370 Does anyone else think Mike Flynn's campaign logo looks more like signage for an ice cream parlor?
--------
It would be great on a little league baseball uniform. I wonder if he will be sponsoring a team?

Posted by: RioBravo at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (NUqwG)

371 368
Well, I'm gonna go read for a bit.
-----------
Check out the reading thread Jane, good stuff on it.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (ry4ab)

372 We're talking women's soccer here Jay, not the St Louis Cardinals.


Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:30 PM (ry4ab)

Huh?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (oKE6c)

373 I quit the video after all the anorexics walked in and the name Anna Wintour was mentioned.

Posted by: tu3031 at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (EDYaR)

374
It would be great on a little league baseball uniform. I wonder if he will be sponsoring a team?

Damn you're harsh.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Lovin Spoonful at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (ye7KB)

375 She is the female Ronan Farrow.
I think feminists idolize her because on some subconscious level they see her for what she is, and have as much contempt for her as we do. Someone like Carly Fiorina, who has actual marketable skills, and can do shit and run things, would make them insecure and envious.

Even though she's what they claim is the ideal she stands as an indictment of how worthless they are. With Chelsea they can pity and look down on her, while claiming to admire her.

Posted by: Flynn sane at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (p7dd/)

376 Oh, Hell, Ted Cruz just made me admire Justice Thomas even more... he's a fellow Dallas Cowboys fan.

... oh, yeah, and some heartwarming story about meeting/motivating a child he met to get better grades in school by giving him a prized piece of Cowboy memorabilia...

... but... COWBOY FAN!

Posted by: Go, Silver and Blue! at June 30, 2015 09:33 PM (21zCy)

377 I'm about as fugly as Chelsea! and I could talk for 10 minutes or so for $65G- maybe about nuclear stuff or something - or hey - the ever present dangers of "swimming attack rabbits"

Posted by: Amy Carter at June 30, 2015 09:34 PM (N787Q)

378 372
We're talking women's soccer here Jay, not the St Louis Cardinals.




Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:30 PM (ry4ab)
Huh?
-----------
Yes I am a Reds fan, why do you ask?

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:34 PM (ry4ab)

379 "Failure Puddle"


Bloody. Awesome.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at June 30, 2015 09:34 PM (L3p2N)

380 --More male athletes are rump wranglers than female athletes are rug-chmpers.
Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (JVgzo)
-----
No way. Say it ain't so.

Posted by: RioBravo at June 30, 2015 09:34 PM (NUqwG)

381 --More male athletes are rump wranglers than female athletes are rug-chmpers.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!!
****

Do I make it a point to ruin your fantasies? Hmmmmm? Do I?

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:34 PM (F0Cog)

382 --More male athletes are rump wranglers than female athletes are rug-chmpers.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (JVgzo)


LOL.

You came up with this based on what, exactly?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:35 PM (MYSVz)

383 just in time to support barky mcfucksticks initiative to forcefully integrate with HUD

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:22 PM (zOTsN)

I stand in awe at the level of multi-level coordination across every conceivable agency, media outlet, lobbying firm, PAC, not-for-profit think tank and law center that the progressives have mastered in their inexorable march to destroy America.
Meanwhile Boehner and McConnell and the entire GOP establishment are barely capable of asking Barky "Please Sir, may I have another!"

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 09:35 PM (ftVQq)

384 logprof , bull shit .
WNBA vs. MLB .
Dykes vs. guys banging supermodels .

Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:36 PM (Jws+u)

385 I'm about as fugly as Chelsea! and I could talk for 10 minutes or so for $65G- maybe about nuclear stuff or something - or hey - the ever present dangers of "swimming attack rabbits"

OK, Amy, hired!

Posted by: Hamas at June 30, 2015 09:36 PM (N787Q)

386 65 grand isn't really holding up her end is it? Hillary may have to go at her with a wire hanger. You know, to make her a "good earner"...

Posted by: tu3031 at June 30, 2015 09:36 PM (EDYaR)

387 Posted by: Webb Hubbell at June 30, 2015 09:24 PM (IziAx)



Even after all of the work Chelsea has had done, she still looks just like you.

Posted by: kakypat at June 30, 2015 09:37 PM (HUXet)

388 of all the things that make me simultaneously grimace and roll my eyes . . . who the FUCK were the 100 VIPs (does that still mean what it used to?) who wanted their picture taken with her? how "important" can you be when you still aspire to get your picture taken with chelsea clinton? do you also have no real accomplishments to call your own? you have to have a super thin resume to be honestly impressed by her . . . what is so "VI" about these "P"s so smitten with a talentless child?

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 09:37 PM (SZWTt)

389 LOL.

You came up with this based on what, exactly?
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:35 PM (MYSVz)

--The rate of homosexuality among males if far higher than among females, period. Look it up.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:37 PM (JVgzo)

390 I made it! All the way through, baby! 8 minutes and 39 seconds! I didn't even pause it because that seemed like it would be cheating. To be honest, I'm afraid I couldn't tell it from the billion other things on TV that I can not give a shit about. Kind of like the fifteen mentions of the gay marriage ruling, and the Texas State Attorney's thing about it, that was on the news while I kept my wife company in the recovery room after her procedure yesterday. I mean, at that point it wasn't even news, so what the heck?

Anyway, what do I win? Oh, I do so hope it's the platinum membership with ampersands!

Posted by: R. Kipling at June 30, 2015 09:38 PM (Tb8YD)

391 Ha! Brian Williams AND Chelsea Clinton AND Stella McCartney, all 8:39 minutes. Where's my medal?

"If you're going through hell, keep going"

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Literate Savage at June 30, 2015 09:38 PM (jR7Wy)

392 388
of all the things that make me simultaneously grimace and roll my eyes .
. . who the FUCK were the 100 VIPs (does that still mean what it used
to?) who wanted their picture taken with her? how "important" can you be
when you still aspire to get your picture taken with chelsea clinton?
---------------
Check out Weird Al's song "Lame Claim to Fame", I think it would explain things.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:38 PM (ry4ab)

393 --The rate of homosexuality among males if far higher than among females, period. Look it up.
Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:37 PM (JVgzo)
----
On sports teams?

Posted by: RioBravo at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (NUqwG)

394

You just know the lefties loved this shit. This is a totally appropriate spend. They are extremely happy when this happens. No doubt about it.

But they could have got that Pitbull rapper to show up for less, I bet. And he would have played well with the African American campus communities, I think.

How about Frank Stallone? is he still around? He would showed up for less than 5 grand.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Esq at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (APXIm)

395 those identifying as multiracial, an option only recently added to the census.



Ummm, sooooo people had to identify as a race they were not. That couldn't have skewed the numbers or anything.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:29 PM (F0Cog)


I seem to remember my grand-mother having high cheekbones. Do I get a prize?

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (ftVQq)

396 384 logprof , bull shit .
WNBA vs. MLB .
Dykes vs. guys banging supermodels .
Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:36 PM (Jws+u)

--384 logprof , bull shit .
WNBA vs. MLB .
Dykes vs. guys banging supermodels .
Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:36 PM (Jws+u)

--Funny, Mia Hamm banged Nomar Garciaparra for a loooong time.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (JVgzo)

397 Rug Chumper? Don't knock it til you tried it.

Posted by: Hillary at June 30, 2015 09:40 PM (N787Q)

398 Funny, Mia Hamm banged Nomar Garciaparra for a loooong time.

Actually, she married him.

Posted by: tu3031 at June 30, 2015 09:41 PM (EDYaR)

399 Sorry, but Morons having issues with physically fit women need to submit their Man Cards for perusal by other hot females.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:42 PM (JVgzo)

400
388 of all the things that make me simultaneously grimace and roll my eyes . . . who the FUCK were the 100 VIPs (does that still mean what it used to?) who wanted their picture taken with her? how "important" can you be when you still aspire to get your picture taken with chelsea clinton? do you also have no real accomplishments to call your own? you have to have a super thin resume to be honestly impressed by her . . . what is so "VI" about these "P"s so smitten with a talentless child?
Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 09:37 PM (SZWTt)


They're the Ph.D. equivalents of the lowly Bachelors' degree automatons that cream their jeans at the opportunity to stand behind Sir Golfsalot or Shrillary when they speechify.

To put it another way, they should take the advice succinctly summed up by the generic "New Yorker" cartoon caption: "I think I'll kill myself"

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 09:42 PM (95CzI)

401 >>>This is all about paying someone to stand as an avatar for one's own Superiority.

I call it vicarious narcissism. I've never understood how anyone could be dumb enough to feel it without becoming aware of it and rejecting it. I'm a man, but I've never been proud of the accomplishments of other men because of it. I'm half jewish, but I'm not proud of discovering Cantor's diagonalization proof. Yet feminists, minority and gay activists seem to want to feel narcissistic about the achievements of superior human beings that share some irrelevant attribute with them.

Posted by: Flynn sane at June 30, 2015 09:42 PM (mG3Qj)

402 Here comes one of our non-soon storms.
I know it's monsoon, but the suggests rain. 9 out of 10 times there is no rain.
There is plenty of wind, dust, and lightning.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:43 PM (F0Cog)

403 Soccer and volleyball babes are feminine, not equine like WNBA players. Distinctions should be important to Morons.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:43 PM (JVgzo)

404 >>>How about Frank Stallone? is he still around? He would showed up for less than 5 grand.



Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Esq at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (APXIm)<<<

And plenty left to get Norm MacDonald to intro him.
Norm: "Hey everybody we've got a great guest speaker for you tonight. I'd like you to give a warm welcome to, you guessed it...... Frank Stallone."

Posted by: when SNL was still kinda funny at June 30, 2015 09:43 PM (21zCy)

405 How many guys did Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilona bump uglies with ?
Pete Sampras and Rod Laver both well known gays , right ?

Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:44 PM (Jws+u)

406 405 How many guys did Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilona bump uglies with ?

Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:44 PM (Jws+u)


Does Dr. Renee count?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 09:45 PM (MYSVz)

407 at least paris hilton made a porn tape and some purses

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 09:45 PM (SZWTt)

408 Chelsea goes for 65K a pop? For that kind of money she would probably do a 'horse' movie, amiright?

Posted by: Eromero at June 30, 2015 09:46 PM (go5uR)

409 Is it too much to have a short story called Fall of the House of Clinton?

Vince Foster is not quite as dead as they thought as Kenn Starr arrives at the mansion to demand answers.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:46 PM (kdHdm)

410 Chelsea Clinton's charisma is so intense, I can only take 10 minutes of it at a time, or I would explode.

Posted by: Nobody Ever at June 30, 2015 09:46 PM (qyomX)

411 405 How many guys did Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilona bump uglies with ?
Pete Sampras and Rod Laver both well known gays , right ?
Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:44 PM (Jws+u)

--Uh, I'm leaving tennis and non-USA women outta this, pardon me.

Go on fapping over veiney, floppy DDD tits.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:47 PM (JVgzo)

412
408 Chelsea goes for 65K a pop? For that kind of money she would probably do a 'horse' movie, amiright?
Posted by: Eromero at June 30, 2015 09:46 PM (go5uR)


Chelsea Hidalgo Sea Biscuit Clinton

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 09:47 PM (95CzI)

413 412 Chelsea Hidalgo Sea Biscuit Clinton

I'd hit it.

Posted by: John Kerry at June 30, 2015 09:48 PM (qyomX)

414 Some may be confusing men in the fashion industry with men in elite sports when it comes to gayness or the lack thereof .
Not that there's anything wrong with that .

Posted by: awkward davies at June 30, 2015 09:48 PM (Jws+u)

415 --Funny, Mia Hamm banged Nomar Garciaparra for a loooong time.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:39 PM (JVgzo)

ONE fucking counter example makes your case? WTF?

LPGA - dyke centralWomen's softball - punchline for dyke jokesWNBA - chock a block with dykesWomen's soccer - totally straight.
No doubt.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:48 PM (oKE6c)

416

do you ever feel like they are taking a bulldozer to America

Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:48 PM (zOTsN)

417 398 Funny, Mia Hamm banged Nomar Garciaparra for a loooong time.

Actually, she married him.
Posted by: tu3031 at June 30, 2015 09:41 PM (EDYaR)

--And I think they divorced. He probably could not keep up with her.

Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:49 PM (JVgzo)

418 Well that would certainly kill even the online pr0n market - Chelsea Clinton, Chelsea Manning, Sarah Jessica, and Jenner all in one movie.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:49 PM (kdHdm)

419

do you ever feel like they are taking a bulldozer to America
Posted by: ThunderB at June 30, 2015 09:48 PM (zOTsN)


Been there... I got nothin'

-- Zombie Rachel Corrie

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 09:49 PM (95CzI)

420 Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (kdHdm)

421 regarding soccer, it is a game for women, children and communists

our women's team is doing well and we are descending into communism while being lead by fucking children

seems appropriate

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (SZWTt)

422 Hillary Clinton is clearly one of the world's greatest orators. No one ever paid Churchill that much for a speech, even adjusting for inflation. Just think, if we elect her, we can get all that eloquence for free!

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (qyomX)

423 "For that kind of money she would probably do a 'horse' movie, amiright?"


Like "American Velvet" or "The Black Stallion?" Sure.

Posted by: C Clinton at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (L3p2N)

424 418
Well that would certainly kill even the online pr0n market - Chelsea
Clinton, Chelsea Manning, Sarah Jessica, and Jenner all in one movie.
----------
Pr0n is supposed to be entertaining, Anna, not some "enhanced interrogation" technique for Club Gitmo.

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:51 PM (ry4ab)

425 I'm waaaaayyyyyyyyy more feminine than those dyke soccer players.

Posted by: Sarah Jessica Parker at June 30, 2015 09:51 PM (JVgzo)

426 420 Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat.
Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (kdHdm)


I don't know, after all this time, she seems like a two-dimensional character.

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:51 PM (qyomX)

427 exdem13 it would be a 'snuff' film as in anyone watching it would immediately off themselves.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:52 PM (kdHdm)

428 425 I'm waaaaayyyyyyyyy more feminine than those dyke soccer players.
Posted by: Sarah Jessica Parker at June 30, 2015 09:51 PM (JVgzo)




Naaaaaaay! (Neigh?)

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:52 PM (oKE6c)

429 O/T Is Greece really a developed country? I thought that it more third-world, like Mexico.

Huh?

Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at June 30, 2015 09:52 PM (baR5c)

430

Chelsea is multi-racial.

She's a Webb Hubbell-American.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Esq at June 30, 2015 09:53 PM (APXIm)

431 Quit stalling me!

Posted by: SJP at June 30, 2015 09:53 PM (JVgzo)

432 Stunning. Academia has gone mad. You would think alma mater donors would go "WTF you doing with our money you fucking idiots?!" but apparently nary a peep.

She is also butt ugly and uninteresting. If she was hawt and could speak, I think there might be a sense of celebritynessity to her appearance butt (sic) urinal cake is the perfect, absolutely perfect, mental image for Webb's daughter.

Posted by: John Doe@AnotherQuidam at June 30, 2015 09:53 PM (g1MTt)

433 So Frauline Maria von Cloggenstein, who ist more feminine? Frau Blucher or Frau Sarah Parker?

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (kdHdm)

434 --More male athletes are rump wranglers than female athletes are rug-chmpers.
Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (JVgzo)
---------
Actually I've heard that around 50% of female athletes are homosexual, whereas with men it's Michael Sam and that basketball guy. Women have a much more fluid sexuality which is influenced by the comeraderie and physical contact of sports more than it could influence men.

Posted by: Billy Jean Kink at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (p7dd/)

435 427
exdem13 it would be a 'snuff' film as in anyone watching it would immediately off themselves.
---------
Right, so it's going on the Club Gitmo mailing list after completion, then?

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (ry4ab)

436 I checked wiki to see if the Corries are still trying to sue people and found this:

On October 21, 2010, the bulldozer driver who had run over Corrie testified for four hours, and was cross-examined by the Corries' attorney.[80] In addition, four experts, including an expert on the behalf of the Corrie family testified during the trial, and concluded that the bulldozer driver could not see Corrie.[81]

I find it so odd that they got it right and no one has tried ot change it. THEIR OWN EXPERT CONCLUDED THAT THE DRIVER COULD NOT SEE HER. END OF STORY....

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (iQIUe)

437 424 Pr0n is supposed to be entertaining, Anna, not some "enhanced interrogation" technique for Club Gitmo.

I hope the CIA is taking notes.

Mohammed #739: "Do your worst, kuffar! I will never tell you where the bomb is! I laugh at your waterboarding!"

Bruce Jenner: "Hi. I'm Caitlyn. Do you like my little black dress?"

Mohammed #739: "Kull Wahad! I want to confess! Get me out of here!"

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (qyomX)

438 Stunning. Academia has gone mad. You would think alma mater donors would
go "WTF you doing with our money you fucking idiots?!" but apparently
nary a peep.



You have to wonder how administrators muster the balls to cough up that kind of money, then turn around and cry poor to the alumni.


I'd be worried that I'd be lynched.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (oKE6c)

439
Q: What is this: _________

A: ASCII Rachel Corrie

Q: What is this: ..................

A: ASCII Rachel Corrie, as painted by a pointillist

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (95CzI)

440 Jane wants to throat punch Juan Williams?

I want to throw a couch at Jerry Rivers. Gawd what an idjet.

Posted by: Infidel at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (HN5+8)

441 Right, so it's going on the Club Gitmo mailing list after completion, then?

You are assuming that Gaylord has left anyone in Gitmo to view it. Besides the guards.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:55 PM (kdHdm)

442 440
Jane wants to throat punch Juan Williams?



I want to throw a couch at Jerry Rivers. Gawd what an idjet.
---------------
Hey, someone beaned Geraldo with a chair once. Why restrain yourself?

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:56 PM (ry4ab)

443 The Stella: Shop online: Shop Playsuits ad on the left is hawt.


Still pissed my software won't block it.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 09:56 PM (JVgzo)

444 Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat.


I went flat.

Posted by: Richard Cory at June 30, 2015 09:57 PM (+jijM)

445 441
Right, so it's going on the Club Gitmo mailing list after completion, then?

You are assuming that Gaylord has left anyone in Gitmo to view it. Besides the guards.
------------
Oh come on, King Putt hasn't traded them all away for Rare Exclusive Foil Cards yet!

Posted by: exdem13 at June 30, 2015 09:58 PM (ry4ab)

446 Zombie Rachel Corrie is joining the Cardinals as a Pancake Batter.

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:59 PM (qyomX)

447
446 Zombie Rachel Corrie is joining the Cardinals as a Pancake Batter.
Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:59 PM (qyomX)


I LOLed

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 10:00 PM (95CzI)

448 Thoughts and prayers to the families of those affected by the C-130 crash in Indonesia.

And a pox be upon the Clintons.

Posted by: Darth Randall at June 30, 2015 10:00 PM (KlVdw)

449 >>>Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (kdHdm)



I don't know, after all this time, she seems like a two-dimensional character.

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 09:51 PM (qyomX)<<<

I still get plenty of traction on Rachel Corrie material.

Posted by: a bulldozer comic at June 30, 2015 10:00 PM (21zCy)

450 Actually I've heard that around 50% of female athletes are homosexual, whereas with men it's Michael Sam and that basketball guy. Women have a much more fluid sexuality which is influenced by the comeraderie and physical contact of sports more than it could influence men.
Posted by: Billy Jean Kink at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (p7dd/)

--My stats are more confirmable online, and you can look up the bios of the USA players (can't say anything about other nations) and deal with it. Lesbians or no, they're hotter than the average celeb out there including any "reality" star.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:00 PM (JVgzo)

451 Actually I've heard that around 50% of female
athletes are homosexual, whereas with men it's Michael Sam and that
basketball guy. Women have a much more fluid sexuality which is
influenced by the comeraderie and physical contact of sports more than
it could influence men.

Posted by: Billy Jean Kink at June 30, 2015 09:54 PM (p7dd/)

I suspect it's more the result of selection; dykes gravitate toward dykey kinds of things, rather like fruits gravitate toward hair dressing and such.

Having said that, I also suspect that you're right, that women's sexuality is more plastic, and even a normal girl immersed in a dykey environment might go that way after a while just because everyone else around her is doing it (women are also much more susceptible to social pressure, methinks).
The upshot is that since the proportion is so high, I assume all female athletes are dykes unless established otherwise. A liberal acquaintance told me about his daughter's college basketball experience for several years, before it recently came out that she and her girlfriend are "engaged," but not yet "married." Another generalization borne out.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 10:01 PM (oKE6c)

452 " Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat. "


Very level-headed joke.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at June 30, 2015 10:01 PM (L3p2N)

453
Zombie Rachel Corrie is joining the Cardinals as a Pancake Batter.


Strike zone: 1 mm.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 10:02 PM (oVJmc)

454 Women have a much more fluid sexuality which is influenced by the comeraderie and physical contact of sports more than it could influence men.

*********

Go on......

Posted by: Bob's House of Flannel Shirts and Wallet Chains at June 30, 2015 10:02 PM (yxw0r)

455 Heads up: Utterly relentless evisceration of an SJW on Larry Correia's Twitter feed. Dozens of messages aimed at this one hapless guy.

Posted by: Splunge at June 30, 2015 10:02 PM (qyomX)

456
453
Zombie Rachel Corrie is joining the Cardinals as a Pancake Batter.

Strike zone: 1 mm.
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at June 30, 2015 10:02 PM (oVJmc)

Juuuuuust a little outside...

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 10:02 PM (95CzI)

457
Heh.

Chalk up another save to Barrel Be-Gone (TM)!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at June 30, 2015 10:03 PM (95CzI)

458 --My stats are more confirmable online, and you
can look up the bios of the USA players (can't say anything about other
nations) and deal with it. Lesbians or no, they're hotter than the
average celeb out there including any "reality" star.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:00 PM (JVgzo)

Their bios? Their bios?? Can't get much more reliable than that.
"Lesbians or no"
So you have your doubts as well, I take it.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 10:03 PM (oKE6c)

459 2:43 or about 3-4 seconds into the two of them talking to each other. Although just to get to that point was unbearable as she is almost as horrible (might be a photo finish if the lens doesn't crack) as her mom at delivering scripted lines.

Posted by: Pete at June 30, 2015 10:05 PM (+xk0T)

460 Their bios? Their bios?? Can't get much more reliable than that.
"Lesbians or no"
So you have your doubts as well, I take it.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 10:03 PM (oKE6c)


--So any babe you can't bed is a dyke?

That's reliable?

C'mon.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:06 PM (JVgzo)

461 Well, the two ex-strippers I dated taught me that generally 50% of all strippers are lesbians.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:07 PM (F0Cog)

462 The upshot is that since the proportion is so high, I assume all female athletes are dykes unless established otherwise. A liberal acquaintance told me about his daughter's college basketball experience for several years, before it recently came out that she and her girlfriend are "engaged," but not yet "married." Another generalization borne out.
Posted by: Jay Guevara at June 30, 2015 10:01 PM (oKE6c)

Less risk regarding the sexual part of it than male homosexuals, and since most men think girl on girl is a turn on, those women who play around on the other team believe that if they decide it's not for them and they find some hot guy, he'll understand.
And probably ask for a reenactment.

Posted by: Jen the original at June 30, 2015 10:08 PM (WV80V)

463 And bacause they may dig chicks we should dismiss the sport they play. Got it.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:09 PM (JVgzo)

464 Well I managed to make it past the stupid fashion show part. Chelsea's voice is just grating. But then when she and the fashion bimbo wanted to "have therapy together", I couldn't take it any more. They don't need therapy, they need... I don't even know what they need. They need to be robbed blind and dumped into the middle of Sharia Land where they are forced to wear burqas and serve as virtual slaves to their Allah-fearing goat-humping Muslim masters, humiliated just enough so that maybe they can understand what types of challenges actual women face who don't have a "staff of 5" to demand comfy chairs for them wherever they go.

Posted by: chemjeff at June 30, 2015 10:11 PM (2XMpf)

465 I'm out.

Didn't click the link.

Didn't even risk a mouse-over.

Back in '08 this worthless bag of waste carbon was out whoring for her mom and someone asked about her cooze-hound of a father and she got all snitty about how she shouldn't even be asked such a thing.

That right there?

That was it for me on Harpy McHillbilly Jr.

SMOD, where is thy sting?

Posted by: Captain Comic at June 30, 2015 10:11 PM (iLQts)

466 And bacause they may dig chicks we should dismiss the sport they play. Got it.

Posted by: logprof
****

I must have missed where anyone said that. If someone did say that, do you want to bet that they even meant it?
Remember where you are at.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:11 PM (F0Cog)

467 The Millennials *know* that the Republicans are The Party of the Rich. All evidence to the contrary is worthless. Ignorance is now the coin of the realm.

Posted by: cm9000 at June 30, 2015 10:12 PM (8zCR+)

468 Don't think Rachel Corrie jokes will ever go flat.


Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 09:50 PM (kdHdm)

I think that Rachel Corrie joke is wearing thin!

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 10:13 PM (ftVQq)

469 463 And bacause they may dig chicks we should dismiss the sport they play. Got it.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:09 PM (JVgzo)


Your butthurt sounds gay.

Posted by: ConservativeMonster at June 30, 2015 10:13 PM (0NdlF)

470 "For $65,000 for thirty minutes' work, you'd think that this graceless
walking graft-bag could have said something interesting or insightful,
no?"

This is why I read AoSHQ!

I would pay double the Platinum membership fee for this kind of prose!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:13 PM (Zu3d9)

471 "And yes, this is racism. This is Female Superiority Racism mixed with Liberal Comfortable Class Tribalism Racism.

This is all about paying someone to stand as an avatar for one's own Superiority."
--------------------------------------------------

I love you Ace. Marry me. In a totally platonic way of course.

Posted by: stealing Ace's turns of phrase for arguments with my useless lib coworkers, YET again at June 30, 2015 10:13 PM (hjMgv)

472 Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 10:13 PM (ftVQq)

They're so one dimensional....

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:14 PM (Zu3d9)

473 Hey Hrothgar, finished the novel yet?

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:15 PM (kdHdm)

474 For your father, I'm here to help your father

Posted by: enzo the baker at June 30, 2015 10:15 PM (kprEY)

475 Well, the two ex-strippers I dated taught me that generally 50% of all strippers are lesbians.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:07 PM (F0Cog)

Ah yes, with two it's no longer anecdotal, it's data!

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 10:15 PM (ftVQq)

476 Ah yes, with two it's no longer anecdotal, it's data!


Posted by: Hrothgar
****

The science is settled. Be quiet.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:16 PM (F0Cog)

477 463 And bacause they may dig chicks we should dismiss the sport they play.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:09 PM (JVgzo)


Not at all. We dismiss soccer because it's retarded sport.

It was the opposable thumb that raised Man over the apes ... and soccer bans the opposable thumb. Biting is cool in soccer, but don't use your hands.

And soccer is a stupid sport that takes all day, lots of running around, no score and ties. Very Eurotrashy.

The lesbianism has nothing to do with how awful and stupid soccer is.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at June 30, 2015 10:16 PM (MYSVz)

478 Posted by: logprof: USA!!! at June 30, 2015 09:32 PM (JVgzo)

1. Bullshit.
2. Unknowable, because the sample sizes are so small.
3. Who gives a shit? As long as they look good during the 40 seconds/year I watch women's sports.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (Zu3d9)

479 I must have missed where anyone said that. If someone did say that, do you want to bet that they even meant it?
Remember where you are at.
Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:11 PM (F0Cog)

--Sorry, gotta agree to disagree. Team USA soccer babes are visually more aesthetically pleasing than WNBA players, and I like athletic women more than floppy-titted, overly-tatted, fake-boobed women in the porn/"exotic dancer" industry. Hope Solo > stick insect super models in my mind. Fuck who you want, fuck who you like.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (JVgzo)

480 "Ah yes, with two it's no longer anecdotal, it's data!"


Lesbian I don't know, but, the "crazy" quotient is high in that population.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (L3p2N)

481 Hey Hrothgar, finished the novel yet?


Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:15 PM (kdHdm)

Last night. Now I really have to get the movie, but it did have more than a few plot twists.

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (ftVQq)

482 Soccer is like fapping without finishing.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (F0Cog)

483 3. Who gives a shit? As long as they look good during the 40 seconds/year I watch women's sports.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:17 PM (Zu3d9)

--And that was my point, CBD.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (JVgzo)

484 Line of the year

The charisma of a urinal cake

I did laugh out Lloyd at that one

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (3mTLw)

485 I am still convinced she had one of those fake baby strap on pregnancy things after seeing her onstage days before the birth of the century. woof. my bad.

Fixin' to take one of my sons to the airport. Have the sadz and hope I don't cry. ugh. xoxo

Posted by: ChristyBlinky,aging Redneck Queen supermodel, has a Hobbit foot at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (FCPu0)

486 --So any babe you can't bed is a dyke?

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:06 PM (JVgzo)

Axiomatic.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:19 PM (Zu3d9)

487 Another black church in Williamsburg County in flames..

Posted by: Mrs. Ace of Spades with a Wang! at June 30, 2015 10:19 PM (iQIUe)

488 I made it to 2:10 in the video, when they called Linda McCartney a "musician". That was enough.

Posted by: Cymbaline at June 30, 2015 10:19 PM (s5/M/)

489 I thought girls you can't bed are bitches?

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 10:21 PM (SZWTt)

490 Line of the year



The charisma of a urinal cake



I did laugh out Lloyd at that one

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (3mTLw)

And it fits so well with the Useless Failure-Puddle lead-in!

Posted by: Hrothgar at June 30, 2015 10:21 PM (ftVQq)

491 488 I made it to 2:10 in the video, when they called Linda McCartney a "musician". That was enough.

Posted by: Cymbaline at June 30, 2015 10:19 PM (s5/M/)


Tell me about it ...

Posted by: Yoko Ono at June 30, 2015 10:21 PM (MYSVz)

492 Lesbian I don't know, but, the "crazy" quotient is high in that population.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill
****

They are also ex-girlfriends now.
It's possible that they, and the other dancers I spoke with (outside of their work) were messing with me, but it didn't seem that way.
One thing was almost 100%, they think we are degenerate idiots for throwing money at them for getting nude.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:21 PM (F0Cog)

493 Hrothgar good luck with the movie.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:22 PM (kdHdm)

494 Got to hand it to Ace, he had me chuckling all the way through the post. ^..^(____)~~~

Posted by: Cheshirecat at June 30, 2015 10:22 PM (e8vZc)

495 I did laugh out Lloyd at that one

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (3mTLw)

Hey!

Posted by: Lloyd at June 30, 2015 10:22 PM (2XMpf)

496 Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:18 PM (JVgzo)

First of all, this is AoSHQ. You do not simply agree. Fight a bit!

Second....as long as you agree that the primary function of women's sports is to titillate, then we are simpatico. But it is not true athleticism in about 90% of the "athletes" who play chick sports.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:22 PM (Zu3d9)

497 less women's soccer
more women's bikini football

Posted by: chemjeff at June 30, 2015 10:23 PM (2XMpf)

498 So any babe you can't bed is a dyke?

Posted by: logprof
****

Any woman I cannot bed...needs more chloroform.

(I denounce myself)

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:24 PM (F0Cog)

499 *ponders*

Sushi or hibachi.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:24 PM (kdHdm)

500 5 65k for 30 minutes....i thought it was for 10 minutes
Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel

A crack Ho as seen on Cops would cost you $25 bucks and you would get something in return

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:25 PM (3mTLw)

501 Sushi or hibachi.


Posted by: Anna Puma
****

Grrrrrrrrr.

(flips safety off 1911)

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:25 PM (F0Cog)

502 "One thing was almost 100%, they think we are degenerate idiots for throwing money at them for getting nude."



Well.....

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at June 30, 2015 10:26 PM (L3p2N)

503 A crack Ho as seen on Cops would cost you $25 bucks and you would get something in return.

Well a few somethings besides a cheap thrill and a possible police record for solicitation.

Posted by: Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:26 PM (kdHdm)

504 also strippers sorta hate men in a weird way emotionally, so . . .

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 10:27 PM (SZWTt)

505 Oh good.....the Iran nuclear talks have been extended another week.

That means that Israel has one more week before they implement their "Bomb The Fvck Out of Iran" plan.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:28 PM (Zu3d9)

506 A crack Ho as seen on Cops would cost you $25 bucks and you would get something in return.
****
Yeah. Something that would never go away I bet.

Posted by: Tilikum Killer Assault Whale Warily Watching Anna Puma at June 30, 2015 10:28 PM (F0Cog)

507 A crack Ho as seen on Cops would cost you $25 bucks and you would get something in return

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:25 PM (3mTLw)


Watch it, buster!

Posted by: Don Ho at June 30, 2015 10:29 PM (MYSVz)

508 nood

ONT

Posted by: AltonJackson at June 30, 2015 10:29 PM (KCxzN)

509 505 Oh good.....the Iran nuclear talks have been extended another week.

That means that Israel has one more week before they implement their "Bomb The Fvck Out of Iran" plan.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June

They should be able to run that drill, in the dark, blind folded by now.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, at June 30, 2015 10:32 PM (3mTLw)

510 LAST!

Posted by: chelsea danger at June 30, 2015 10:32 PM (SZWTt)

511 But it is not true athleticism in about 90% of the "athletes" who play chick sports.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 30, 2015 10:22 PM (Zu3d9)

--I submit that any of the Team USA soccer babes could run circles 'round 90% of us Morons.

Posted by: logprof at June 30, 2015 10:39 PM (JVgzo)

512 OK, the comparison to Van Halen is completely unfair. Van Halen used to put stuff into their riders so that promoters would actually read the contract. The Clinton Crime Family puts stuff into riders exactly so that promoters DON'T read the contract. Hey, it's covered!

I would curse the Clinton Crime Family, but they have given me inspiration to start my own nonprofit organization. Ace, you really need to look into doing something similar!

Posted by: keninnorcal at July 01, 2015 12:25 AM (3OTR8)

513 Ace won't go there for obvious reasons, but Chelsea literally looks like someone put clown makeup on an ugly dog.

Posted by: Justfactualthings at July 01, 2015 03:13 AM (oCxXI)

514 Chelsea Clinton standard rate card:

10 min speech $65,000
5 min speech $130,000
No speech $260,000

Posted by: patchy at July 01, 2015 10:35 AM (8qK6f)

515 "If I started a "charity" and contracted to pay all your food and rent costs for the rest of your life, would you claim that you were being 'uncompensated"?

Sure. I would testify to that. Is that the right answer? What do you want me to say when asked about it?

Posted by: Chris Balsz at July 01, 2015 04:32 PM (8rRE+)

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