Too cool...

I'm futzin' around in my referral logs again and not only do I find that I'm #4 (!) for "Wheely Willy" now, I'm also in the top 10 for the "who would even to think to look this up?" category with the word "duuuude". Somebody looked up that word and I'm #8.

I rather like that one. Lord knows I say it often enough. Usually follwed by, "What are you doing?" I do love men, but Jesus, do they find some goofy got-damned ways to do shit sometimes.

Bill, the guy who owns this place for instance, thinks it's a good idea to squirt water on an overheated electrical panel. You know, with circuit breakers and shit? God forbid he should actually FIX IT. He also said he wants me to do a Mexican Hat Dance really step on my cigarettes and be sure they're out anywhere in the barnyard/freestall area lest a bird swoop down, grab the left-lit-cigarette-stub and fly into the barn with it and drop it in the hay mow.

Cause, like, ya KNOW birds do that. That's soooo much more likely to cause his barn to burn than squirting water into an electric panel.

Ya see what the hell I hafta deal with around here? And... HE'S THE FRIGGIN' "BOSS". (May the Lord Bless and Keep Us... all the hell away from that nutjob.)
(Christ, he makes me miss Wally and Wally usedta make me wanna kick his ass at least three times a week.)

Eric just always does shit the hard way. Ya know how there's usually two ways to do something? There's the quick, easy, yet maybe the slightest bit unconventional, way to do a thing, then there's the "workin' for the Department of Motor Vehicle Services" way, where ya make a simple thing a day long oddessy into hell? He does that.

I, on the otherhand, am the "Miss Permanant Jury Rig" of my generation. Sure, I use a lot of ducT Tape ("Home Improvement" reference... to be said with those T's really emphasized and even a little spitting going on...) and coat hangers, but dammit, stuff stays fixed forever, which, coincidentally I'm sure, is exactly how long it takes y'all to get around to "really" fixing shit.

FOR INSTANCE.... *snerk*... About, oh a week or two ago, Eric "had a confrontation" we'll say, with the bottom panel of the front screen door. He was already pissed and, as inanimate objects are wont to do, it decided to pick that day and time to get cute, so... he kicked it's ass. Now, it looks like hell and the kittens are eyeing it as a possible escape route and he said, when I asked him about it the first time about a week after he did it, that he would fix it "tonight" when he got done milking.

Well, that was about 4 or 5 or 6 days ago and yesterday, first thing in the morning- like around 5:00am- I asked him (outta the blue, more or less) "When is it gonna be the night?" He looked at me all googly eyed and said "What night?" I said , "The night yer gonna fix the door..." which earned me an eyeroll and a "stk" sound as he poured his o.j.

I'll be fixing that a little later myself. It'll just be easier on everybody, including the door. Truth be told, I've had to fix this very thing on several doors that were dumb enough to fuck with me at the wrong second, so...

Ya know... It just occured to me as I re-read this that Eric, that little snot, IS doing this "easy" way by letting go til I do it myself. Heh. Little shit.

Aah, well, I love 'im, he's cute, well hung... I'll let 'im live, as usual.

This'd be a lot easier to get done (along with all the other shit I wanna do today) if I hadn'ta frigged up my right (of course) arm and hand. Apparently, I slept on it wrong and now it feels like I smashed my palm with a hammer on purpose and like there's a steak knife in my shoulder. I can't make a decent fist, nor lift a cuppa coffee without it hurting and lighting cigarettes is sheer agony. Ain't a whole lot better with my left hand on that last one, if for an entirely different reason. There are lots of things I can do with either hand, but flickin' a Bic ain't one of 'em. I usually wind up bouncing the lighter offa my face or somehow flying it halfway across the room when I try it with my left hand. It's like my left hand is retarded or something.

Yeah, speaking of shit I cannot do left handed... siiigh. Of course now that my right hand is not functional, my little terrorist buddy decides it's time for a comeback. He's not here yet, but he's making himself known, as it were. And, here I sit, with Ben Gay from shoulder to fingertip and I use O.B.'s. Now, that could make things "interesting", hey? I don't wanna start with them thangs til I have to and I'm not gonna sit here in pain whilst I wait, so... See why I call this place what I do? Jeez.

Alrighty then, on that note....

I haven't forgotten the post I wanna do, or Brando or the emails. I've just been a little busy, a little crippled and a lot "going to hell on that road that's paved with good intentions". You know... the teflon expressway? Yeah, that one...

I will get to it all.
Peace.

Posted by: Stevie at 06:24 AM

Comments

Posted by: Michele at July 05, 2004 10:09 AM (oopqz)

Posted by: Mad Mikey at July 05, 2004 10:55 AM (xBlvx)

Posted by: Acidman at July 05, 2004 09:41 PM (MdHRM)

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