I'm alive, but only "just barely"...
Fuckin' cold.
Not even Nyquil is making much of a dent.
(I'll take the liquid and the man, if he's available. I'd love to have his "skills" available to me right about now... I don't have a problem with the human OJ, anyway. Never have, never will. Fred Goldman, on the other hand, needs to sit down and shut up, but that's an entirely different post... *coupla seconds later* Aw, shit... let me put it this way... if I could meet one of them, it'd be OJ, okay? Fred Goldman just squicks me out.) Anyway... after the store, there is a "made over the last five days by six people, one of whom I hate" mess all over this house that I, alone, get to clean up. Real nice, huh? Pft. Whatever. The excellent news is that the asshole, and his buddy, is gone.
Took being threatened with State Troopers to accomplish that, but, hey... whatever it takes.
And, he was told to never come here again, so when he does, he's going to jail.
And and, if Jr. doesn't like it, there's the door, don't let the doorknob get jammed in your asshole when I slam it shut behind you. Not only do I never want to go through anything like that again, I won't, period.
End of fuckin' story. And, I swear to God, the next time I say "They're shit, get 'em outta here" and get argued with by Sr. about it, I'll kick his ass, too. I knew the first time those pieces of shit came here what they were.
I was told I was wrong.
THEN, when they came back and wouldn't leave, Sr. changed his mind.
"They have to go... They're horrible... What trash..." Yeah. Why the FUCK didn't you fuckin' listen to me three weeks ago when I said that in the first fuckin' place?
How DARE you make me change my position, then TAKE my position after it's proved, yet AGAIN, that I was right in the first place.
How many more times do you need to have this happen before you listen to me from the gitgo, you fuckin' BONEHEAD? No more times.
That's how many.
None.
Because I won't let that happen again.
Fuck a person learning from their mistakes, if they never do learn, ya know? After this, I will be listened to, even if I hafta get physical to be heard.
(Locking and barring doors, sitting on people's chests while I scream in faces, that kinda shit... it would be better than what we just got put through... I promise.) It'll never happen again.
At least not in the house I live in.
You wanna fuck up... take it on down the road and do it there.
Or, get your OWN house and do it there.
Keep it away from me or I will make you regret being born, not listening and inflicting it on me, I promise that, too. Promise, not "threaten".
PROMISE.
And, I take my word very seriously.
You should, too...
Especially after this shit. Christ. Anyway, fuck that.
Fuck Jr. and his attitude til it changes and fuck this cold, too. All I care to give a shit about right now is: store, clean the house, soak in tub, back to bed and TV. I'll make sure these guys have what they need, but... that's about all I can do right now.
In fact, that's all I should have to do.
Ever.
These are able-bodied people I live with, after all.
But, I've found that it's easier in the long run to do all the house shit myself than it is to hafta first fix what they fuck up when they "help", then still hafta do it all myself anyway. Less work if I just do it in the first place.
(Which is total bullshit, I know, but... this does have it's benefits and it works for me, unless I have a cold that is trying to kill me as I type... *snerk*) So, to recap... The lying peice of shit is gone.
It will never be here again.
The house is recoverable, if I get on it right quick.
This cold sucks donkey balls.
Gotta go to the store. And, speaking of lying pieces of shit... Jon the Liar guy is stopping by sometime this weekend.
I just remembered that.
Fuck.
Somebody come and kill me, please.
I'll write a note for the Prosecutor for ya so ya won't get in trouble. (Yo, God... da FUCK did I do to You? What? You think it was ME who killed Jesus, or something? How's about a BREAK here, okay? Fuck.) Other than that pending "interlude", all I want is a clean house and everybody to leave me the hell alone til this cold fucks off. I want my peace and quiet back.
I want my way of living my life back.
And...
I will have it.
One way or the other, I will have it. Watch me. Later, y'all....
Comments
1
Cold remedy that always worked in my younger days.
Needed.
1 quart El-Toro Tequila
2 doobus largus
1 pint jalapeno peppers
Instructions.
1. Find safe place to stay for 24 hours
2. Drink half of the tequila
3. Smoke one entire doobus largus
4. Eat entire jar of jalapenos
5. Kill an hour while this cooks in your gut
6. Smoke other entire doobus largus
7. Drink remainder of tequila
8. Pass out in a safe place (near the toilet)
9. Sleep 12 hours
10. Get up, puke, shit, wash.
11. Repeat step 10 as necessary
12. No cold I ever had survived such a buzz.
Worked for me everytime when I was younger. I'm to old to use any mind altering substances anymore. I haven't had a cold in at least 10 years either. Maybe I am radioactive from doing the above so much when I was young.
Good luck. Let me know how it goes.
:-)
Needed.
1 quart El-Toro Tequila
2 doobus largus
1 pint jalapeno peppers
Instructions.
1. Find safe place to stay for 24 hours
2. Drink half of the tequila
3. Smoke one entire doobus largus
4. Eat entire jar of jalapenos
5. Kill an hour while this cooks in your gut
6. Smoke other entire doobus largus
7. Drink remainder of tequila
8. Pass out in a safe place (near the toilet)
9. Sleep 12 hours
10. Get up, puke, shit, wash.
11. Repeat step 10 as necessary
12. No cold I ever had survived such a buzz.
Worked for me everytime when I was younger. I'm to old to use any mind altering substances anymore. I haven't had a cold in at least 10 years either. Maybe I am radioactive from doing the above so much when I was young.
Good luck. Let me know how it goes.
:-)
Posted by: assrot at October 12, 2006 07:30 PM (ARCEn)
2
I'm tellin ya, a strong dose of Tennessee whiskey with honey works wonders (tastes a hell of a lot better than Nyquil too)! Jalapenos, or better yet Cayenne peppers work, but you pay the price big time on the outbound....
Posted by: vizsladog3 at October 12, 2006 11:50 PM (4qWsH)
3
jeez. that all seems pretty extreme.
I've always burned it out of my system with a couple nodoz and by drinking nothing but caffienated soda.
Just jack up my metabolism.
Of course, people within a 50 yard radius all started bleeding from the ears and nose spontaneously.
Not my problem.
I've always burned it out of my system with a couple nodoz and by drinking nothing but caffienated soda.
Just jack up my metabolism.
Of course, people within a 50 yard radius all started bleeding from the ears and nose spontaneously.
Not my problem.
Posted by: Mad William Flint at October 13, 2006 01:46 PM (g/0ur)
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