Yeah, I know...
I said I wasn't gonna post anymore til I'm done.
BUT...I've had a strong indication of how this is all gonna go, this cleaning, this time. I go out into the kitchen and finish off the dishes.
I look around, trying to decide how best to begin this process whereby everything I need to do, to move and put back all slides around and blends well, like a ballet almost, or one of those small, plastic kids toys with all the numbers and they're outta sequence and you have to slide them up and down or back and forth to get them in numerical order.
Remember that precursor to the Rubik's cube? Anyway, I decide to start with the top of the refrigerator.
(Don't ask.) I pull a chair over, step up onto it and as I straighten, I begin to hear this noise, this whipwhipwhip near my head. I ducked so quickly, I'm surprised I didn't keep going through the wooden chair seat and looked up... right at the whizzing ceiling fan. I came within about three inches of standing up right into it. And, what would have made it even more "interesting" is the fact that I have my hair in a huge ponytail, right on top of my head.
(Yes, I do look vaguely like a Pomeranian...) Since I nearly either scalped or decapitated myself, I have a.) made some good progress... toward getting started. (Well, what would you call cleaning the top of the stupid refrigerator in order to eventually shampoo carpets?) and, b.) spend a considerable amount of that time wondering just what woulda happened had I stood up right into the blades of that fan.
I've got the ponytail goin' on.
It was on the fastest speed.
And, I was standing on a chair. Would it hitting me have just destroyed the fan or would it have sent me cartwheeling in midair across the kitchen to end up slamming into cabinets and finishing the trip in a broken heap on the floor?
Or both? Or, might it have just tried to rip my hair off? All I do know is that the instant I heard the noise of blades whippin' by, my EMT brain screamed "DUCK!!! Tiny(?) chopper landing!!!" Followed immediately by "What the hell? Tiny chopper?" That's when I looked up and saw what it really was. Want a better idea of how fast and hard I ducked? I remember my ponytail hangin' in midair for an instant and I felt it when it caught up and landed on my head. That's how "instantly alert" I got. Then, I nearly pissed myself laughing. Tiny chopper.
Indeed.
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