1 Rats... I missed #100,000 by a couple.

That's a pretty extraordinary milestone darlin'. Congrats!

Wish I knew where to point out another handle for ya, but I can't even seem to find one for myself. Maybe if I just grab you?

P.

2 Just don't poke yerself on the pushpins.
*snerk*

(And, what's Rob bitchin' about Munu not remembering him for? My stupid comments don't remember me either.
*grin*)

3
Hi Love,
Shit, fuck, cunt, bastard! I had just typed about a thousand words of deathless prose to you when I hit some damned key that erased the whole freakin' thing ! ANYWAY...I ain't read your great stuff since my last note to you. So tonight, here at work, I decided to read my hotmail (first time in about six days, and I get about 85 worthless comuniques per day offering such irresitable crap as, borrow money from us, get a college degree in three weeks for hardly any cash, try OUR pornsite, cheap! (I ain't got nothin against porn, but there must be millions of drooling unwashed loveless folks pouring millions of dollars into the coffers of these guys...not to mention pre-pube computer geniuses screwing up their future sex-lives by wallowing in this not-quite-real, out-in-left-field view of sex. Of course, I like porn, but I only look at the free stuff. Luckily my seventy-five year old neighbor doesn't charge me anything...) I erased over 800 of these exciting communications.

Then I remembered I hadn't read your blog since I wrote you last (about two weeks or so)and here I am. Your stuff is so cheerful, it perks me right up! However, through equine death, deadbeat diner patrons, balky vehicles, periods, commas, and a host of other frustrations, your sardonic humor and survivorness (I can make up words if I want to..) makes your blog a great read. I'm quite proud of my two progeny with IQs high up into three digits. (not toes and fingers, idiot..)Your stilted ideas, undoubtedly caused by the wonderful maternal care you survived, (although what's really wrong with you Ma sleeping with your boyfriends? You're such a Puritan...) and the anguish they cause, are no match for your nimble and wonderful intellect! Now, that and $2.40 will get you a gallon of 21st century gas, but in actuality, your I.Q. is your salvation. Wow, I sound like Uncle Jim talking about Jeeeesus. Perhaps one shouldn't go off on a computer rant at 4.00am, but (most) of what I'm telling you is very true. (The part about my seventy-five year old neighbor isn't true, for instance. She's seventy-nine.... I didn't want you to think your father was a PREvert..hanging around with old people..)

By the way, I see your wacko count is up to 100015. You're gettin' more converts than Billy Graham! Now his converts is off to Heaven, I don't know where yours is goin'.

Now, somebody brought in samples for us to run. Idiots! We've had a nice relaxing three hours with no work. Oh well. I'll check you again soon....

Much Love,

Your pateral unit...