Monday Jokes on Friday

Every have one of those weeks where you're behind a day? All week long, I thought it was one day later than it actually was. That makes today extra-bad because my body thinks it's Saturday and yet I'm at work. So here's some humor to hopefully lighten your way into the weekend.

Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Blonde: A white one...

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Blonde: Your left or my left?

Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Blonde: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it..

Blonde: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Blonde: Aaaah....................thank you.

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Blonde: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

Tech support: How may I help you?
Blonde: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Blonde: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a capital letter V as n Victor, the number 7.
Blonde: Is that 7 in capital letters?

Posted by: Ogre at 06:05 PM

Comments

1 I work in tech support. One day I got a call from this guy who was trying to install Quicken. He said that he had put the floppy in the disc drive and nothing happened. This was in the days when Quicken was on floppy and you had 7 disc's to load. He had jammed all 7 in one after the other on top of each other and had ruined his floppy drive.

Posted by: Skyler_the_Weird at December 16, 2006 04:54 AM (KkQmZ)

2 Hey, I thought they were all supposed to go in at one time!

Posted by: Ogre at December 16, 2006 03:50 PM (eznLF)

3 i work for a cable isp, we get them all the time... my favorite one is "sir, what lights are flashing on the front of your modem?"... "well the first, the third and the last one".... like we can tell which side their modem is sitting on...


also, why is it that every 3rd caller has their smoke alarm beeping every 30 seconds??? is there a shortage of 9v batteries?

Posted by: chris at December 16, 2006 10:55 PM (rBjHa)

4 "The green light is flashing."

And my smoke alarm used to beep -- until I ripped the damn thing out of the ceiling because it wouldn't shut up. No it's very quiet.

Posted by: Ogre at December 16, 2006 11:05 PM (eznLF)

5 ogre, ive been reading this page a long time, i just moved to the triad, and if you ever make it up to this area, hit me up, ill buy ya a beer

Posted by: chris at December 17, 2006 05:07 PM (rBjHa)

6 Thank you very much! And you're in the Triad? I'm not sure that you'll be able to afford a beer after you start paying taxes there, but thanks very much for the offer. If I'm ever headed that way, I'll drop you a line!

Posted by: Ogre at December 17, 2006 05:41 PM (eznLF)

7 yeah near high point, the taxes aren't all that bad, i mean i get about $90 per check taken out for state taxes, but what gets me is the asinine gas taxes (a full 14 cents above SC) and the liquor laws... i mean who ever heard of a state run liquor industry... WTF is that nonsense... but I'm loving the weather, i hear all my Florida friends complaining that its cold when its 60 down there and i just laugh at em

Posted by: chris at December 17, 2006 05:58 PM (rBjHa)

8 And strangely enough, that is the #1 reason people will put up with this abusive government in NC: the weather! The state runs the liquor industry for one reason -- the same reason they do everything they do in this state: for cash to spend.

Posted by: Ogre at December 17, 2006 06:32 PM (eznLF)

9 well coming from a state where tourism tax was the main income, this is definitely a little different. one thing i haven't figured out is that i get hit with different % sales taxes on different items... its like a 1st grader laid out the tax system

Posted by: chris at December 17, 2006 09:40 PM (rBjHa)

10 Don't try and figure it out -- it's going to change this year when the Democrats raise taxes by another billion. Current word is that sales taxes will rise by 1/2% to 7.5 and 8 percent, depending on where you live.

Posted by: Ogre at December 17, 2006 09:54 PM (eznLF)

11 I used to do level 1 support in college part time. My favorite is:

User: "when I press the power key nothing happens. [Sound of clicking button] See!"
Me: "Ma'am, have you checked the power cord?"
User: "Ohhhhhh, yeah... the cord was unplugged"

Posted by: michele at December 18, 2006 02:40 PM (etwyR)

12 Ah yes, the true classic. It's absolutely amazing how many people never check the power cords!

Posted by: Ogre at December 18, 2006 02:55 PM (oifEm)

13 Hey, I'm a natural blonde, and I'm offended. Okay, not offended. Actually my kids come home with the best dumb blonde jokes for me.

Posted by: Stacy at December 21, 2006 09:17 PM (92p8H)

14 It's okay, if you're offended you get to burn stuff. That's the rules these days, apparently.

Posted by: Ogre at December 21, 2006 10:05 PM (5n/mm)






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