You Know You're from MA
I lived in New Hampshire for about a year growing up, and I visit about once a year. Very nice place, especially since it's home to the Free State Project. However, dooming NH is the nearby Massachusetts, which exports liberalism like ebola. Courtesy of Raven, we have ways to tell you're from Massachusetts:
You know you're from MA if... You think crosswalks are for wimps... You think if someone is nice to you they either want something or they are from out of town and lost You know how to cross four lanes of traffic in three seconds You think it's not actually tailgating unless you're touching the bumper of the car in front of you You know that a yellow light means that at least five more people can get through before the red when another two can make it The public transportation system is known as the "T" and you'd rather drive in bumper to bumper traffic for 4 hours to get to Boston than be caught dead on the "orange line"... You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your house and that is how you give directions When people talk about "The Curse Of The Bambino" you know what they're talking about and used to believe it, too You believe using your turn signals gives away your plan to the enemy If you stay on the same road long enough it eventually has three different names Someone has honked at you because you didn't peel out the second the light turned green You have honked at someone because they didn't peel out the second the light turned green Anyone going faster than you is a maniac. Anyone going slower than you is an idiot. All the potholes just add to the excitement of driving Stop signs mean slow down a little, but only if you want to Six inches of snow is considered a dusting Three days of 90 degree heat is definitely a "heat wave" 55 degrees is "on the warm side" - You cringe everytime you hear some actor/actress imitate the "Boston Accent" on TV or in a movie; if you don't have it then you're never going to get it even if you were born here At the ice cream shop you call chocolate sprinkles "jimmies" A Water fountain is called a Bubbler, or rather, "Bubbla" You can go from one side of town to the other in less than fifteen minutes and see at least fifteen losers you went to high school with doing the same thing they were doing when you saw them last You know how to pronounce towns like Worcester, Haverhill, Peabody, Scituate, Chatham, and Leominster You know what they sell at a "packie" You have never been to Cheers...any of them You've slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater You keep an ice scraper in your car all year round Paranoia sets in when you can't see a Dunkin Donuts, ATM or CVS You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block oncoming traffic so you can make a left You've bragged about saving money at The Christmas Tree Shop (don't cha just love a bargain?) You know what a "regular coffee" is! You can navigate a rotary without a problem You feel the rest of the world needs to drive more like you You use the words "wicked" "pissa" and "good" in the same sentence, and often in the same compound-adjective You know what a frappe is Saint Patrick's Day is your second favorite holiday...even when you're not IRISH! You drink tonic and would never consider using it on your hair You never say "Cape Cod"...... you say "The Cape" You went to Old Sturbridge Village and Plymouth Plantation at least once, in elementary school, but never to Bunker Hill You know the Mass Pike and 495 create some sort of strange weather dividing line You almost feel disappointed when someone doesn't flip you off when you cut them off or steal their parking space You actually get all these jokes
Comments
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Posted by: Raven at July 22, 2006 12:40 AM (Ekosm)
2
If they'd stay there and stop taking MY money, I wouldn't care what they did. In fact, I'd sit back and laugh at them. But they take my money so they can survive because they can't do without it.
Posted by: Ogre at July 22, 2006 01:44 AM (o2crh)
3
You think cranberry sauce is a vegetable.
You drink dike-ur-ies.
You know what "blue laws" are.
You remember where you were when the ball rolled through Bill Buckner's legs.
You knew all along that the Big Dig would be a Big Dig-aster.
You drink dike-ur-ies.
You know what "blue laws" are.
You remember where you were when the ball rolled through Bill Buckner's legs.
You knew all along that the Big Dig would be a Big Dig-aster.
Posted by: Leslie Carbone at July 22, 2006 01:29 PM (QD1HB)
Posted by: Ogre at July 22, 2006 01:35 PM (o2crh)
5
Hey now, I am from Massachuesetts. I can't believe nobody else knows what a 'packie' is. I thought that was universal.
I do actually get all those jokes.
I do actually get all those jokes.
Posted by: PoliticalCritic at July 23, 2006 12:08 AM (1nHnP)
6
I only lived there for a year and I know just about all of these!
Posted by: Ogre at July 23, 2006 12:27 AM (o2crh)
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