Review: Four boob-filled horror flicks
Last winter I picked up a discount four-movie collection called Too Hot For Hell. I'll admit right up front (no pun intended) that one of the reasons I bought it was because all four movies included nudity, and once in a while I just want to see some boobs. Moving beyond that obvious character flaw, let's look at these movies individually.
Crystal Force II. This flick isMy biggest gripe about slashers is that the plot too often consists of “group of teenagers gather in one place and get killed.” I’m sorry, but six cool methods of murder in a row do not make a storyline.
A woman spends fifteen years in a mental hospital, and when she’s “cured” she moves in with her sister and husband. She’s turned into a promiscuous nympho, which the husband attributes to being locked up in the loony bin all those years. Actually, being possessed by a succubus has the same effect. Who knew? As the story advances, the sister can’t convince her husband that the former Miss Padded Cell is evil, mostly because he refuses to believe that the odd things going on are anything more than coincidence. In the end, the evil sister wins. Included in the mix are satanic black mass rituals, a weird midget fortune teller, several slit throats and plenty of gratuitous boobage and simulated sex. Not a boob job to be seen either, the woman all sport unenhanced bosoms. Mostly, the characters act like you would expect them to in a given situation, and the suspense builds nicely as the movie goes along. Everything isn’t hunky dory in consistancy-land though. The evil one slips her sister the date-rape drug at work and has a friend rape her in her office, where she gets busted by the boss. The sister knows what happened, and when she tries to explain to the husband the conversation gets out of hand and he walks out on her. The very next morning though, everything is fine again between the sisters (“screw the husband, that loser”) and they spend the day together as if nothing happened. Funniest prop: While sunbathing, they’re downing “beers” which are actually bottles of IBC Cream Soda. The credits, both start and end, go on way too long, showing various scenes from the movie. To their credit, there aren’t any real spoilers given away, and it serves mostly as an excuse to string together the nudity and (poorly done) gore. After the movie ends there’s an extra few minutes of bonus trailer that I think was added just to pad the minutes listed on the box. For a low-budget flick, this one is pretty good. To sum up, this collection is pretty bad. The first two movies are bad in a bad way, but the other two are bad in the delightfully cheesy way that I love. There are some pretty good boobs on display, and since that's partly why I bought it in the first place, I don't feel like I got ripped off. Much.
Posted by: Ted at 11:42 AM
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