September 23, 2003
I can't help myself
Nic posted her favorite joke. Hey Victor, how can you not love that? That's funny!
Since it's apparently going around, I'll toss in my contribution. What's green and sits in your backyard? Paddy O'Furniture.Posted by: Ted at 11:54 AM | Comments (58) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Zuppa Toscana
The Olive Garden restaraunt chain serves this wonderful sausage and potato soup. I don't know if this recipe is identical, but it's very very close.
Ingredients:1� cups sweet sausage links (12 links)
3-4 slices bacon, cut up into small pieces
� cup diced onion
1� tsp minced garlic
2 medium potatoes
4 cups chicken stock (1 box of Swanson stock = 4 cups)
2 chicken bouillon cubes
red pepper flakes to taste for heat
2 cups Kale leaves, sliced into thin strips
1/3 cup heavy cream Directions:
Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Place sausages onto a sheet pan and bake for 25 minutes or until done. Cut into half lengthwise and slice at an angle into �" slices. Cook bacon and onion together until onions are almost clear. Add garlic and cook an additional 1 minute. Cut potatoes in half lengthwise then cut into �" thick slices. Add Chicken stock, bouillon, pepper and potatoes. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer 15 minutes. Add sausage, kale and cream. Return to boil, then simmer 5 minutes.
Posted by: Ted at 08:35 AM | Comments (57) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
My Y2K Story
Airplanes falling from the sky, microwaves working at half-power, medical machines going haywire, all civilization crumbles. All because of an event given a catchy little name (that’s what we demand in today’s world). “Year Two Thousand” just doesn’t ring in the ears like “Y2K”. A high-tech abbreviation to describe the real-life situation caused by another (necessary) high-tech abbreviation years before.
For the most part, Y2K was a letdown. Unheralded hundreds of thousands of people worked untold millions of hours to make it so. I was one of those folks, but my Y2K wasn’t quite the non-event that most of us had. I am a mainframe programmer. I started out by punching IBM cards and stacking them together into ‘program decks’. No, I’m not that old, it’s just that the military is always a little behind the times. Proven technology is preferred over cutting-edge stuff that might not work when you most need it. Thinking about it just now, that punch card technology was still heavily used just 20 years ago. In 1994, I was working as a civilian consultant to the U.S. Government. My partner and I (we were a two person contract) were discussing the upcoming ‘2000 situation’ and what we would need to worry about to prevent problems with our systems. This was even before the phrase “Y2K” was coined. One day, we mentioned it to our client (the big boss) and she told us not to worry about it, because our systems were going to be replaced long before 2000. Part of what we get paid for is to anticipate problems and devise possible solutions to things that might not even happen. Knowing that replacing computer systems is a complex job, we weren’t nearly as confident as she was that it would happen before 2000, so we quietly did some preliminary analysis and wrote up some specs and notes. Two years later, I’m sitting in my office and we get the official word that we have to convert our systems to be ‘Y2K compliant’. By now, the other guy has left for another project, and the staff consists of me, myself, and I. I won’t go into a lot of detail, but I lived and breathed Y2K for the next four and a half years. Our systems contain over 2,000 separate programs and our data files maintain almost 10,000,000 (yep, million) records, and it’s all real-time. We – the government folks I worked with and I – busted our asses and got it done ahead of time and under budget. So I was feeling pretty good about things. My wife and I didn’t have any plans for December 31, 1999. We were just going to relax at home and have a quiet evening. Sometime after dinner, I mentioned to my wife that it felt like I’d just had a shot of Novocain and that my jaw felt funny. Within an hour, the numbness spread to the whole right side of my face and, after talking to the HMO duty-nurse, we were on the way to the emergency room. They did a CAT scan, which told us that I hadn’t had a stroke (and that thought had never crossed my mind before that). In fact, the doctor came into the room and announced that ‘they looked at his entire head and didn’t find anything’, which cracked my wife up. By now the entire right side of my face was paralyzed; can’t blink, can’t move my lips, nothing. The doctor tells me that I’ve got Bell’s Palsy. It’s an inflamation of the cranio-facial nerve (the third, in my case), and they don’t know what causes it. What happens is that the nerve runs through this little tiny tunnel in your skull, and when it gets inflamed, it pinches itself against the bone and gets damaged. They gave me steroids, which medical logic says will help, but they admitted that they almost never do. The nerve grows back ever so gradually, over the course of months. Other than that, they just taught me some things I needed to be aware of. For instance, because I couldn’t blink my right eye anymore, I had to tape it shut before I went to bed so that it wouldn’t dry out. I had drops I had to put in my eye to keep it moist during the day. I figured out early on that I wasn’t the world’s best dinner partner, because food kept falling out of that side of my mouth. I drooled too. It was actually kind of funny, but I’d never laugh at anyone else who had it. Probably the worst part was my sense of taste. It’s rare, but y’all know I’m special, so it was inevitable I guess. I completely lost the taste of sweet. Eating a cookie was like eating cardboard. Ranch dressing tasted like rancid buttermilk (to this day I can’t stand it). Think about your favorite foods, and imagine no sweetness at all in the flavor. Not fun. My recovery was about 85% complete in the next year. Most people can’t even tell, but I can. I still slur the occasional word, and my right eye droops when I get tired. My sense of taste returned, thank God. We were checking out of the ER that New Years Eve of Y2K, just about an hour before midnight. It suddenly struck me - I did all that work getting my computer systems ready to go, and it turned out that half my face was non-compliant. I told my wife that and laughed like a madman. She threatened to make me walk home.Posted by: Ted at 07:32 AM | Comments (55) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
It could be a long season
I'm not a fair-weather fan, but last night my beloved Oakland Raiders looked like an old team a year past their prime. They're going to win some games, and possibly even make the playoffs, but it's going to be a roller-coaster ride this year.
Posted by: Ted at 07:10 AM | Comments (54) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
September 22, 2003
Book tour
If you've seen the movie October Sky, or read the book Rocket Boys upon which the movie was based, then you've already met Homer Hickam. Homer was one of the original Rocket Boys, and he wrote the book as well as several more since. You may also remember that Homer Hickam went on to become an aerospace engineer with NASA, and helped design the Space Shuttle.
Homer Hickam will shortly be beginning a tour to promote his seventh book. Details and schedule can be found here. If you haven't read any of his stuff, I highly recommend it. He's also been very supportive of educational programs including the Team America Rocketry Challenge. I posted this on the old blogspot site once, but it's one of my favorite pictures, so here it is again. Mookie and Homer Hickam, taken at the Team America Rocket Challenge 2003 Finals.Posted by: Ted at 07:40 PM | Comments (64) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Safe and sound
John and crew have reported in. All's well in the land of SilverBlue, meaning nobody was hurt. They had a much rougher time of it than we did, that's for sure.
Posted by: Ted at 11:13 AM | Comments (60) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Rocketing Around the Blogosphere
Good morning everyone! Let's jump right into it, eh?
I’ve been misspelling Kelley’s name now for a while, and she’s been kind enough not to have someone come by and break my kneecaps. Visit her at Suburban Blight, because she’s nice and her Cul-de-sac rocks. Meanwhile, Kevin at Wizbang! survived Isabel while posting away despite losing power. That's dedication. In addition to that, he's always available to help people like me with technical problems. Check out the new in-line trackback ping-o-rama bling-bling at the end of my posts (those are my words, I'm sure Kevin would know the technical terms). Thanks Susie and Jen for pointing me at this. Kevin also points to the story of the guards at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. Honorable men like this are why we are free. Post-Isabel pictures from Victor and Nic. What do Wesley Clark and the Magic 8-ball have in common? Rattle their liquid-filled domes, and a random answer pops out. Read all about it at Jockularocracy. Daniel expands upon the concept of moral relativism, and gets my vote for his entry in the New Blog Showcase. According to that concept, just because the other entrants exist, doesn't mean they're worth a crap, or something like that. I just skimmed the article, because it's full of big words. Not Quite Tea and Crumpets shows another example of political correctness gone wild. No wonder our education system is all N’d up. Rocket Man talks about ‘A Formidable Military Force’. Take his little quiz. You’ll learn something. I guarantee it. In case I'm not clear about this, I think this is a must-read. Why must I hint? This guy is snotty and vicious, which is everything I like in recreational reading. Megan, meet Tim. Tim, Megan. Two very good bloggers who happen to be devout Christians. Which reminds me of a t-shirt I saw once that said: "Be a Christian. Take a lion to lunch." Hey, I laughed. Glenn over at Hi. I’m Black! is considering selling t-shirts. Pretty funny stuff, and make sure you read the comments. Unfortunately, when I tried to order one, he said I could never be considered an honorary black. That's why I used 'bling-bling' up above, I'm trying to build my street cred. Harvey comes awful close to causing me to become curt with him by using a picture of my dog in his war of lies and propaganda. Note that my dog is an innocent bystander. Also note that it takes some doing to make me get curt. Unless you’re Mookie, in which case I can go from zero to “you’re grounded” in seconds. Sanity’s Edge pointed out this endearing little screed. Thanks Paul! The last line is a classic. "...there's a reason why there are hundreds of statues of Charles Darwin and none of River Phoenix." I forgot to thank Pixy Misa for his technical expertise. He keeps things running smoothly around Munuviana. Finally, a quick tour of the weird. Mookie presents us with viking kitties. That's right, she wants to take us to a Gay Bar. This cracks me up every time. Over at The Cheese Stands Alone, LeeAnn always seems to find the sublime. From the mildly odd to the entertainingly depressed, you owe it to your analyst to go visit. Stevie, I reminded Mookie to get with you about your PC sounds. If she hasn’t contacted you yet, get ornery with her. I recommend grounding her, it does wonders for her cooperation and attitude. Speaking of. FREE MOOKIE! Like Susie says, consistancy is for wimps. Wow. I just realized that I used the following in a single post: moral relativism, Darwin, magic 8-ball, devout Christian, bling-bling, formidable military force, and street cred. Google is gonna turn up some interesting hits in the weeks to come.Posted by: Ted at 07:35 AM | Comments (69) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
September 21, 2003
Too funny
I missed this one when it originally happened, but a friend pointed it out.
California Governor Gray Davis on his vision for the state: "My vision is to make the most diverse state on earth, and we have people from every planet on the earth in this state. We have the sons and daughters of every, of people from every planet, of every country on earth," he said. Another friend noted that Gray Davis is so boring that bringing out Al Gore was intended to "spice up" his campaign!Posted by: Ted at 05:48 PM | Comments (61) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Dog Rules
1. Dogs are never permitted in the house. The dog stays outside in a specially built wooden compartment named, for a very good reason, the dog house.
2. Okay, the dog can enter the house, but only for short visits or if his own house is under renovation. 3. Okay, the dog can stay in the house on a permanent basis, provided his dog house can be sold in a yard sale to a rookie dog owner. 4. Inside the house, the dog is not allowed to run free and is confined to a comfortable but secure metal cage. 5. Okay, the cage becomes part of a two-for-one deal along with the dog house in the yard sale, and the dog can go wherever the heck he pleases. 6. The dog is never allowed on the furniture. 7. Okay, the dog can get on the old furniture but not the new furniture. 8. Okay, the dog can get up on the new furniture until it looks like the old furniture and then we'll sell the whole darn works and buy new furniture... upon which the dog will most definitely not be allowed. 9. The dog never sleeps on the bed. Period. 10. Okay, the dog can sleep at the foot of the bed. 11. Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you, but he's not allowed under the covers. 12. Okay, the dog can sleep under the covers, but not with his head on a pillow. 13. Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you under the covers with his head on the pillow, but if he snores he's got to leave the room. 14. Okay, the dog can sleep and snore and have nightmares in bed, but he's not to come in and sleep on the couch in the TV room, where I'm now sleeping. That's just not fair. 15. The dog never gets listed on the census questionnaire as "primary resident", even if it's true.Posted by: Ted at 05:16 PM | Comments (64) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Chinese Space Shot
I mentioned in passing that the Chinese would be making their first attempt at manned space flight, probably around the first of October. As the Brazilians learned earlier this year, accidents can happen at any time and quickly turn triumph into tragedy. The Chinese have learned this lesson as well. Then again, like any totalitarian society, what's a few peons killed when you have an opportunity to steal technology?
Posted by: Ted at 04:40 PM | Comments (64) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Commercial aircraft countermeasures
The Bush administration plans to spend about $100 million to develop an anti-missile system for commercial planes, more than originally discussed, reflecting concern that terrorists might try to use shoulder-fired rockets to shoot down an aircraft.
They're talking about things like Stingers and vintage Soviet SA-7's. Of course, this will be difficult and take time, which is one reason why certain members of congress are facilitating the crackdown on dangerous terrorists like Cub Scouts and others who fly hobby rockets and RC cars and planes. These politicians aren't interested in solving the problem, they're interested in appearing to be solving the problem. Sen. Charles Schumer, D-N.Y., has sponsored a bill to equip the 6,800 planes in the U.S. commercial fleet with some form of anti-missile device at an estimated cost of $10 billion. He said the Bush administration was still moving too slowly. They must be taking care of us, because they're spending so much money. We're just not smart enough to appreciate it.Posted by: Ted at 04:23 PM | Comments (64) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
September 20, 2003
Thanks for the effort
A neighbor called this evening, letting us know that some friend of hers had called and said our water wasn't safe after the storm. It was during dinner, so my wife said she'd look for some info on the internet and let her know what was up.
Turns out that certain areas of our county get their water from Fairfax county, where they lost power at the water treatment plants. The notice warning us about the potential for unsafe water was buried on the county website. They tried real hard to spread the word. (sarcasm
ff)
We're ok, because the morning of the storm we filled the dogs water with fresh, and we stockpiled quite a bit of water for drinking and cooking. Since it was there, that's what we've been using instead of tapwater. No real reason, just because.
If my neighbors turn into zombies from drinking mutant water, do I have to actually let them enter the house before I shoot them in the head?
Posted by: Ted at 11:21 PM | Comments (66) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Quality time
Mookie got grounded today. The details aren't important, suffice it to say that she did a half-assed job on one of her chores, and it caused some problems.
She tends to get moody in these situations, but the wife and I make it a point to get on her case about accepting the consequences and moving on. After dinner we went out back and threw a log into the firepit. The swing is still soaking wet from Isabel so we pulled up chairs and just sat and talked for a couple of hours. School, friends, world events, religion, favorite books, the conversation took some very interesting turns. It was a nice evening.Posted by: Ted at 11:14 PM | Comments (67) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Diminishing Returns
In Norway, they've harnessed the power of the tides to turn an underwater 'windmill' and generate electricity. So far, so good. The only problem is, the generating plant cost $11 million and will supply the needs of 30 homes.
Doesn't seem nearly worth it now, does it?Posted by: Ted at 10:07 PM | Comments (63) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Cleaning up
Taking a break... Mookie and mom went to work today, so I'm handling the cleanup by myself. It's not that bad. I just finished raking the backyard of all the sticks and leaves, and then swept the patio and walks. Now all that's left is putting things back where they belong, like flower pots and bird feeders. Found quite a few frogs, and managed to steer two into the raised flower bed before the dogs discovered them. It's fun watching the dogs find little creatures, because they've never hurt one yet, but man do they act fierce. And once the beastie gets away through the fence, then they come over for lovin' since I owe them my life. Funny as hell.
Seriously though, Sam our oldest dog (Skye terrier), will place himself between anything like that and my wife, and will not let it pass. He's getting up there in age, but acts like a youngster again when it comes to protecting the wife. He's a damn good dog. We may have a casualty from the storm. Last night I went to run a load of laundry, and I think I may have damaged the water pump on the washer. For some reason, our water pressure in the neighborhood was low, and I'm guessing that the water pump had to work extra hard trying to do it's job. Now the washer is dripping water (into the tub) which isn't a good sign. The washer we have now is probably five or six years old, but the one before that was 'the washer that would not die', so we were terribly spoiled. I'll be annoyed, but not surprised if we have to get a new one in the near future. Working outside for an hour, and I'm bushed. This last week took more out of me than I realized. Oh well. Back to it! Get these plants out and watered before Mr. Sun reaches their spot.Posted by: Ted at 10:22 AM | Comments (63) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Never say that
Everyone has 'hot' words that just make them cringe when used. I'm not talking about racially charged words or swear words. Just the everyday words that really bug them.
For example, I used to go bananas when my kids said they hated someone. For me, 'hate' isn't a word a child should be using against someone else. It was kind of hammered home one day when a group of kids, including mine, came up and announced that (talking about another kid) "they hated that idiot". Two parents immediated got involved, me and another dad, but while I was talking to mine about 'hating', he was chewing his kids out for the word 'idiot'. He couldn't stand the word. Drove him up a wall. Later we were talking and I mentioned it. He thought I was kind of naive for the 'hate' thing and I tried to explain it wasn't just the word itself, it was the word applied to someone else for no reason other than you're mad at them at that moment. I asked him how he managed without the word idiot since there were so many of them around, and he cracked me up when he said the word asshole was a pretty decent substitute. What makes you cringe when a child speaks? What words set you off no matter who says them?Posted by: Ted at 08:41 AM | Comments (68) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
September 19, 2003
Happy Birthday
Not just another Munuvian, but the King Munuvian himself, celebrates his birthday on the 20th.
Happy Birthday Pixy Misa, and thanks for everything you've done. Here's hoping you have a great day! A special tagline just for you: There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who know binary, and those who don't.Posted by: Ted at 08:03 PM | Comments (69) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Modern day pirates
(warning: full-on snark post follows)
Posted by: Ted at 04:25 PM | Comments (65) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Time for a little levity
I've told you before, and I'll tell you again: Go read the flea!
An Oxford museum has paid 240,000 pounds for a Renaissance plate which shows a male head made up entirely of phalluses. The head is framed by a garland carrying the inscription: "Ogni homo me guarda come fosse una testa de cazi" (Every man looks at me as if I were a dickhead). Archeology means intelligent ladies in khaki and glasses. Mmmmmmm. And no, I'm not talking about Lara Croft. Try the History or Discovery channels once in a while. Meanwhile, over at Bad State of Gruntledness, Matt points the way to my new number 1 on the Christmas List. Hockey Lego!!! Matt and Victor, I'm in a (free) Fantasy Hockey League and last time I checked they need more teams... interested? More later. Gotta go get ready for the dentist. Boy, that's a phrase I never thought I'd say so cheerfully.Posted by: Ted at 11:08 AM | Comments (62) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
After-Action Report
Here’s a wrapup of our little corner of Isabellaville.
My wife was supposed to go in to work today at noon, and we expected the worst part of the trip to be getting out of our neighborhood to the main roads. She works for an optometrist in Manassas (~20 miles away), and the doctor called this morning to report that she had no power. Don’t bother coming in unless she calls. Good deal. I called my dentist to check on the situation there (very local). No problemo, see you at noon. Woot! The extent of our problems around the house was two upstairs windows directly facing the wind were accumulating some water inside the window sill. I carried two sopping wet towels downstairs this morning. That’s it, except for some raking and sweeping outside. Normally, an inch of rain here causes some basement flooding. What happens is that the rain soaks into the ground and runs downhill to the creek which is behind our houses. There’s a thick layer of clay a couple of feet down which keeps the rain from deep soaking so the water winds up flowing under and around our row of townhouses. When it gets to where the water can’t drain fast enough, it comes up into our basement between the slab and the foundation. We’ve lived in this house now for almost 15 years and I cannot prevent the flooding, but I can minimize it and control where it happens. I’ve got it to where any water we get soaks a small corner of my workshop. I can keep up with it with towels and a wet vac, no problem. All the important stuff is already up off the floor. So we got way more than an inch, and I expected to be in bad shape, flood-wise. Instead, we got not a drop. What I think happened this time is that the rain fell so fast that it didn’t have time to soak in very much, and most of it drained as surface runoff, for which we’re very well prepared. Whew! Update (this section):We just heard from my sister-in-law. Her mother-in-law (my brother-in-laws mom) has a beautiful piece of property in Baltimore harbor, surrounded on three sides by water. It’s the core of their whole extended family, because everyone picnics there and keeps their boats there and fishes from there, etc. They’ve flooded before, you kinda expect it living that close to the water. But this time, everything is pretty much destroyed or under water.
So yeah, I’m counting my blessings this morning, because this storm was absolutely zip for me personally, but I know that it could’ve been much much worse. Much of old-town Alexandria is underwater, but cleanup is already going on as waters recede. Of course, the worst of the flooding happens tomorrow and Monday when all that rain from the west comes down the rivers towards the bay. Anyone hearing anything at all from John, Tink and crew, or WindRider, Bill, and the rest of the Virginia Beach gang? It sounds like Kevin and Victor and Nic are doing fine. Think good thoughts folks, it ain’t over for everyone.
Posted by: Ted at 10:33 AM | Comments (57) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
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