Everybody's Doing It!

1. Do you have a personal hero? If so, who is it?

Isaac Asimov.

2. What is your favorite book of all time and what made it so fucking good?

What, one book? Uh... John Barnes' One for the Morning Glory. It's a fairy tale, written for adults, it's a fairy tale that knows it's a fairy tale and revels in it, and the wordplay is amazing. Read with a dictionary close at hand.

3. What does “diversity” mean to you?

Nothing in particular. The phrase diuerse alarums, on the other hand...

4. What is the wildest thing you’ve ever done?

Wild? Um. Riding a giant inflatable banana being towed behind a speedboat. I think that's probably it.

5. Do you regret doing it?

Regret not doing it again.

6. Can you drive a stick shift?

Not legally.

7. What’s the highest speed you ever traveled in a car?

About 150km/h - maybe 95mph.

8. Were you driving, or riding at the time?

Riding. Won't say who was driving.

9. Which is better: snakes or spiders?

Look, I live in Australia. Either one will kill you soon as look at you. Spiders are easier to squash - a cinder block dropped from a good height, say, or a sledgehammer if you're out of cinder blocks. On the other hand, snakes can't jump. Also, there's usually more meat on a snake.

10. What is the most disgusting thing you ever ate?

Salmonella enterica. (By the way, salmonella.org has a Buy from Amazon link. Thanks, but no.)

11. Have you ever shit your pants? Be HONEST!

See previous entry.

12. Was losing your virginity an enjoyable experience?

On the whole, yes.

13. Should oral sex be outlawed or encouraged?

Certainly not outlawed. And I don't think it needs official encouragement.

14. Name one man with a fine ass.

Balaam.

15. Do you watch golf on television? If not, will you iron my shirts?

No. And no.

16. Who is Martha Burk?

Not sure. Is she the new editor of the New York Times?

17. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I'd like to be all-powerful.

18. Do you eat raw oysters?

No. I also do not eat raw slugs.

19. Are you claustrophobic?

Let me out of here!

20. If you rode a motorcycle, would you wear a helmet even if the law said you didn‘t have to?

Yes. I only have the one brain, and flawed though it might be, I'd like to keep it safe inside my head.

21. Name five great Presidents.

Those guys on the mountain plus one.

22. Name three shitty Presidents.

Clinton, Chirac, Putin.

23. Now call me fanny and slap my ass. Just kidding.

Yes, Fanny.

24. This is the 4th of July. Did you set off any fireworks?

No, because (a) I'm in Australia and (b) the miserable excuse we have for a state government has banned private firework displays without a permit.

25. If you could have dinner and conversation with anyone in the history of the planet, who would you choose?

The young Diana Rigg, I think. Yes.

(Questions from Gut Rumbles via diuerse sources.)

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 02:23 AM

Comments

1 Now if everybody jumped off a cliff......
(parents down-under DO say that to their kids, don't they?)

Posted by: Susie at July 09, 2003 06:06 AM (QVnOi)

Posted by: Pixy Misa at July 09, 2003 03:57 PM (w7Pkc)

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